Saving Hearts
by elli.zz
Summary: Bella is a troubled girl, running from a shattered home in Phoenix. She arrives in Forks, with no where to live and nobody to turn to in desperation she goes to a house party and meets an boy who saves her from the broken world. All human.
1. Chapter 1 Shadows

**EPOV**

There isn't a lot that can entertain me around here, Forks, its beauty is a given although not one for night life. But for some reason every other night my big brother and little sister drag me out with their friends. All I want is to get drunk so I can at least seem to enjoy the trivial dribble that the girls around here think I want to hear. A bit of control wouldn't go a miss? Instead they wear next to nothing and throw themselves upon me, I try to deny leaving them with dignity – however that is impossible if they didn't have any to begin with.

So, the "legendary" Edward Cullen – escaping from the hideous house party of someone I don't even know. Smoking away in the shadows so nobody can find me and drag me into a horrific excuse for a conversation. I care really, about some things – my family, my music and lots of other things that are just skipping my mind. And then I see her.

A slim figure of a girl had flown out of the house and stopped under the lamp-post. She doesn't look anything like any of the other girls in Forks. Her hair, long dark auburn, wavy, curly and wild – uncontrollable. Standing sideways to me she was silhouetted, her glorious figure outlined brightly, her clothes were ragged and worn. A tight black long v-neck and ripped grey washed-out jeans. She slipped her slender fingers into a pocket and pulled out a long cigarette and held it in between her full lips.

She was beautiful, she was struggling again with her fingers searching in the opposite pocket and I couldn't help but stare at the breath-taking form that was in front of me. My god, I sound like an idiot, absolutely smitten with a girl I don't even know. Her eyebrows were furrowed in frustration, her lighter wouldn't work. Flicking and flicking it – eventually she lifted her head let out a sigh of desperation, again one last click. Nothing. Frustration over came her and she threw the lighter against the wall and started to thrash around. She ran out of breath, crouched down and silently whimpered.

Right, Edward - I said to myself, I needed to talk to her. "Need a light?"

**BPOV**

After everything that happens to me tonight, I finally get away from Phoenix – to Forks, so far away from everything. And now this, I can't cope. I just wanted a light. I sound so spoilt, but the things I have seen. Stupid lighter, I am here alone now outside freezing cold without a smoke. "Need a light?" a voice from no where made me screech, and fall backwards from my crouching position, the crash made my wounds pound.

A tall bronze wild haired man, with strong features, so beautiful even from the shadows. He rushed towards me – "My god, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to frighten you. Just I saw you struggling without a working lighter" his voice was warm and welcoming, the first like it I've heard for a while.

"No not at all, please may I?" I tried to reply with an audible voice whilst struggling to get up, he placed his strong large hands on my arm and helped me up. "May you what?"

"Um you offered me a light, and made me fall over" I said with a girlish smile,

"Oh yeah, I was distracted… Of course you can" we were standing so close; I felt his breath on my head. His hand was still on my arm, so warm I felt so safe. I looked up at his eyes and caught them – green as the grass, the trees, the ocean; I have no idea what you could compare them too, so beautiful. For a while we stood studying each other. "Right, yeah – lighter, cool hold on" he got his lighter from his pocket simultaneously as I raised my cigarette into my mouth. His hand cupped my chin and my hands holding the cigarette and resting the other upon his wrist.

"I don't think I can thank you enough…?" Trying to discover this kind man's name,

"Of course, I'm Edward Cullen"

"Well, thank you very much Edward" I tried to sound cute and he smirked. "Am I not allowed to know your name?" before answering I paused, took another drag "You may indeed Edward, it's -"

"Oi! Slut!" The alleyway echoed with this beast's words. It made me want to hurl, the sound curled my stomach. "What the f*** are you doing out here?" James, the brute I had met him inside. "Watch your mouth James! And f*** off inside" Edward knew him, he stepped out in front of me, and spread his arms wide in a protective stance. "Cullen, you're messing with the wrong girl. She's a dirty whore!"

"Oh has poor James been rejected? Become an emotional drunk have you James?" Edward was mocking James. James was the same build as Edward but James could throw a punch – that much I knew. "She is the one who tried getting off with me and couldn't help herself – couldn't keep herself of off me, I had to say no" James was lying.

"You tried to rape me – you brute! I wouldn't so you hit me and you threw me down the stairs!" stepping out in front of Edward, I don't know what I was doing – I was furious. "You little b****" James ran towards me and slapped me with his backhand and sent me flying too the wall.

**EPOV**

I've had enough of this fool, someone as beautiful as my unnamed friend would never touch him. Suddenly she burst from behind my protective stance, "You tried to rape me – you brute! I wouldn't so you hit me and you threw me down the stairs!" the shock gripped me paralysed. Anger soured through me. He erupted "You little b****" he sprinted at her and whipped her with his back hand. Before I could think I tackled him to the ground and began to pound into his face.

"EDWARD, stop please!"


	2. Chapter 2 Chatter

**BPOV**

"EDWARD, stop please!" I shouted but my voice grew coarse. He sat up from where he had been hammering James face into the ground. When I saw his eyes they were full of anger, suddenly a flood of realisation drowned his face when he spotted the shimmery gloss over my eyes. He sprinted towards me after a second glance down at the mess he had created. James wasn't going to get up for a while. Edward lifted my heavy head with a large comforting hand and left it on my cheek.

"Bella" I whispered

"What? Sorry I didn't hear you?" He asked, I had to clear my throat and spoke louder,

"Bella, my name is Bella Swan" he gently stroked the hair from my face but I still flinched my head was thumping, he looked hurt himself at my reaction. I didn't want him in pain for what I had done.

He noticed the panic in my eyes and let out a light chuckle; "Come on then Bella, let's sit down somewhere" He rubbed off the blood speckles from his hand on his hoodie and grabbed my hand. An electric tingling when soaring through my body, he turned back to me with a curious look playing on his features and I giggled. What a noise, giggling I felt like as child – giggling – but he laughed along. As we left the dark alleyway and over the crumpled James, a wave of relief swarmed over me as I finally felt safe.

"Seriously? Your sister actually did that?" I burst out laughing at his anecdote. Edward and I had been talking for about two hours, when we finished a topic he would glance up at me with a doubtful look, full off worry but he would just shake it off. We were sat on a bench opposite the house party underneath another lamp-post. He was sitting straight forward but body inclined to me and I was sitting cross legged facing him.

"Yeah she did, it sounds ridiculous but Alice does things like that. I don't know how I cope" Edward said with happiness and laughter. He had been describing his family and friends to me for a while. Alice, the little pixie causing madness and happiness hand in hand. Emmett the trickster always playing about, but he really looked after them. They were both in relationships, Alice had Jasper and Emmett was with Rosalie. We laughed until it died out and I studied my dirty fingernails because I knew what he was going to ask.

"So, do you have any family?" right on queue. His eyes were impending. I had to answer.

"I did. But no brothers or sisters it was just me. I've recently left home and moved here" I had hesitated but added a fake smile to cover the truth. It was the truth just a nicer version.

"Oh that's cool, bit brave – I thought you were the same age as me?" Edward asked curiously.

"Yeah, yeah I am. Well a bit older by a few months but yeah" I answered innocently,

"You are transferring schools then? To our little Forks High? But just for senior year?" He probed.

"Yeah I guess, I suppose… Yeah probably I'm really-" I stumbled along an answer until Edward cut me off,

"Oh s***, please forgive me. I didn't mean to be all nosey in your business like that. I was just curious you know? Sorry" he looked so frightened I couldn't help but laugh.

"Not at all Edward don't worry. It's cool really. Just caught me off guard with the twenty questions" his expression lightened and his gorgeous smile was back.

"Holy crap, that is a cool ringtone" I said as I recognised 'Let the Drummer Kick' by Citizen Cope resonate from his pocket

"Yeah it is my brothers – he set it, Emmett? I did tell you he was a wanna-be drummer. He calls that 'his song'. But yes it is a very groovy ringtone" we both simultaneously burst out laughing.

"Edward, you are the grooviest guy I know!" I couldn't help myself but to tease him.

"Groovy baby – Austen Powers, totally babe? I can not pull that off can I?" Edward joked back with me.

"This may be a shock to you Mr. Cool, but no body can pull that off – minus Austen Powers" I replied with a generous smile on my face.

"Bella honestly – this is the most fun I've had around here for a while. Crap I was probably supposed answer that" Edward said with a laugh and pulled a face that sent me giggling again.

"Who's that then?" I asked as a different ringtone began from the same place, a snappy, pop tune.

"That's Alice, meaning I'm in trouble" he answered bashfully

"I know the song, its womaniser right? But there is no way that that is Britney" I inquired.

"Oh no, god no, it's this guy my sister is obsessed with, called Sliimy – weird stuff. But this cover is pretty good. I'll have to answer this; excuse me" He got up and stood at the edge of the bench.

I watched him pick out his phone from the hoodie pocket. It was a big shinny phone. How infantile, but it was impressive. I automatically looked away, like I wasn't good enough to look at it or him, he was clearly from a good family. I'm just some homeless girl sitting on a bench. My thoughts were caught when I heard a loud squeal from down the phone and I turned in shock.

**EPOV**

Bella was brilliant; she was smart, funny, and so beautiful. I'll get them back for calling and interrupting me, twice. Bella's eyes followed my hand into my hoodie pocket. But when I got my phone out she shook her glance away and stared at her hands. She looked worried, which in turn worried me. The phone call, come on Edward, I forced myself to concentrate.

"Alright, Alice?" I was somewhat grumpy at her for the poor timing.

"OH yeah nice to hear from you, nice to hear you so cheery. Where the f*** are you? We are heading home soon yeah?" Alice was so fiercely rude in her innocent voice, mocking me as always.

"Sure Alice... I am outside with a girl okay? Heading home is fine, but I'm going to drop her off first. She will fit in the Volvo, so it's cool yeah?" Despite my initial hesitation I rushed the sentence really quick so she couldn't comprehend what I've said.

"Hold the phone Edward?" She paused to consider and I took the opportunity to tease her, "Yes Alice, that's what I was doing" I retorted quickly.

"No! Shush! Did you just say you're outside with a girl?" I couldn't answer quick enough so Alice intervened, "Edward I will take you're silence as a yes you know?" And she had me, there was no option but to give in.

"Yes Alice" I said with a sigh.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! OHHHH MY GOD! Edward I'm so proud of you. This is brilliant, you haven't talked to a girl in ages. I knew it! It was just a matter of time. My god, what is her name? Hold on let me get the others. We will meet you outside!" She was so loud I had to hold the phone away from my ear. I looked round to see Bella staring at my phone in astonishment.

"I know" I mouthed to her. Before I realised Alice wasn't on the phone, she had hung up on me. "I'm so sorry Bella, they are on there way outside…" I apologised sincerely. She looked panicked, her eyes went so wide. I saw her full chocolate eyes; they were so beautiful, so scared.

"Chill Bella, they aren't that bad" I tried to calm her with a joke. I reached out to stroke her arm. But she flinched away and stood up.

"Are you kidding? Look at me Edward, I'm not like you. You're family wont like me, they'll judge me. They don't know me Edward. You don't even know me. I might be a complete psychopath!" She was so quiet, but the words she said hit me like swords. I didn't know what to do. Impulsively I stood up and grabbed her into a tight hug. Her little form fit into my own like a puzzle piece. She started shaking and I reinforced my grip. Her breathing slowed to a normal pace as I held her at arms length and looked her in the eyes.

"You are wrong Bella Swan, I know you" I said it with such sincerity, she smiled. It doesn't sound like much. Her lips spread across her face, she titled her head slightly

"Edward, I-I'm homeless"


	3. Chapter 3 Complication

**BPOV**

"You are wrong Bella Swan, I know you" Edward near whispered to me, the sincerity in his voice and his eyes reassured me. But he doesn't, the stubbornness in me came through in true form. I titled my head to the side and pushed a boundary that I didn't want to.

"Edward I-I'm homeless" I stuttered, clearly not as confident as I thought I was. He was the first genuinely nice person I have met in over 3 years. Edward's face went blank. He shook his head and stared deep into my eyes, boring into my mind. His hands were still locked onto my arms. He raised one and placed it on my face and stroked where I had cried into his chest.

"Doesn't matter – where are you staying?" Edward brushed off my statement and became so logical so quickly.

"You're kidding Edward. I'm _homeless _meaning without a home yeah? So I'm not staying anywhere." I said rudely and I tried to compensate with a smile, but his dismissal had rendered me bewildered.

"No right yeah, of course, where are your things?" I shrugged him off as he wasn't listening to me or not comprehending my situation.

"In there" as I pointed I shivered thinking of what had happened when I was last in the house. "But Edward your not listening to me, I have nowhere to go" I repeated stubbornly.

"I'm offering my house, we have plenty of rooms you can stay as long as you like" Edward said comfortingly, his sincerity over whelmed me again. He broke out into a large pearly smile I couldn't help but mirror this until I came back to reality.

"I can't; you've known me for about-"

"Doesn't matter, I promise" he said whilst cutting me off and tugged me across the road with his hand clasped around mine.

**EPOV**

I don't care if Bella is homeless, she doesn't deserve to be, that much I know. There is no evil or bad in her and I trust my judgement. Just because she is homeless doesn't mean she functions differently to anybody else, I can still read her face and she's honest. Admittedly I did not call homeless when I first saw her… But she is not a bad person. She could come home and stay with us; Rosalie and Jasper practically live there anyways. We had just reached the other side of the road when the whole gang popped out the house Alice first, followed by Jasper then a furious Rosalie a close third.

"Edward! There you are! Hello" Alice said in her little pixie voice, I just ignored her. I turned to Bella to see her hiding behind me but smiling shyly. I smiled at her small cowering figure and she looked up and smiled more convincingly.

"Right Mr. Rudey-Pants, I'll introduce myself" Alice said playfully whilst pushing past me. She was small but forceful. Bella quickly flustered with her beautiful hair in a nervous motion but Alice was gentle.

"Hey there, I'm Alice" Alice waved an outstretched hand towards Bella. She hesitantly offered her hand back.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Bella" Alice's smile grew bigger – if that was possible – as she began to ease Bella.

"What a beautiful name, it suits you" Alice said with a wink, Bella blushed furiously and shook her head.

"Hardly" Bella replied quickly. Alice was speaking the complete truth, Bella was beautiful, I could tell the rest of my family agreed, especially Rosalie; her face was distorted with jealously. Sure, Rosalie was beautiful – it was more of a science of beauty when it came to Rose, symmetrical and proportionate. But Bella, her beauty was so natural and breath-taking; I just couldn't put it into words.

"Alright 'shwaty', I'm Emmett" Emmett reached over to shake Bella's tiny hand; a big mocking smile covered his face – typical Emmett. Bella's eyebrow rose to the challenge.

"Yo, rude boy" Bella replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes playfully. Everybody cracked up, minus Rosalie who stubbornly held in her laughter but her smile was evident.

"Aha, nicely done Edward, I see she has a sense of humour" Emmett smiled at Bella, who was still giggling when I looked back over to her – her laugh was so innocent and menacing at the same time.

"And this is Jasper and Rosalie" I finally piped up, pointing at them accordingly. Jasper waved awkwardly and Rosalie nodded in Bella's direction but quickly turned away.

"So, I here that we are giving you a lift home Bella" Alice chirped. With Bella's latest confession she looked up to me for guidance on how to answer.

"Actually, she is coming home with us" I interrupted; Bella was silent and stiff at my side. My family were silenced also, but Rosalie interjected quickly, and fiercely.

"Why on earth would you bring her home?" Venom rushed through her voice as she glared me down.

"Because I said so" I replied angrily before she had a chance to rattle off on some judging rant towards Bella.

"Edward, I'm sure she is lovely. I mean I can tell you are Bella, but maybe another time?" Alice replied diplomatically, her eyes full of consideration.

"No, she's coming with me" I tried to emphasis that there was no other option.

There was a sudden explosion from Rosalie; she was off – talking and talking at me. I didn't actually she was saying as my anger was rising. I looked down to Bella; her beautiful eyes were shimmering over with tears, begging and pleading. But for what, I was unsure. I couldn't leave her at the brunt of the world alone.

"She has nowhere else to go!" I shouted on top of Rosalie's rant. Silence was ridden through our group again. I turned and put my hands on a shocked Bella's arms and looked her straight in the eyes. "Bella, you are coming home with me, its going to be fine. I'm just going to get your things from inside, okay?" I gently stroked away a runaway tear from her cheek.

"Thank you" she whispered almost silently, I held her close before turning back to my still silent family. I just walked through them. But hesitated as I didn't want them to leave her alone as I presumed my family would follow me.

"Hey Jazz, Em, you couldn't stay out here with Bella could you?" I said once I reached the door. Emmett gave an understanding nod and Jasper gave thumbs up. As I opened the door and Alice and Rosalie were close on my heels.


	4. Chapter 4 Friends

**Chapter 4; Friends **

**BPOV**

Once Edward had gone inside and asked the boys to stay outside with me, Alice and Rosalie ran off after Edward. I felt so guilty that I had caused such trouble within such a close group. I had heard so much about them and I was just messing everything up.

"Soo," Jasper said awkwardly while rocking backwards and forwards on his heels.

"Dude, you haven't introduced yourself properly yet" Emmett replied happily, as he gave Jasper a punch on the arm. I think Emmett thought it was a gentle one, but the look on Jaspers face said differently. Emmett was big and muscular, but the big grin on his face showed that he was still a big child at heart; big being the operative word.

"Oh right, sorry Bella: I am the one, the only masterful Jasper" he said with a bow. I giggled – again, again with the giggling…

"Masterful!" Emmett boomed with laughter "more like master-NOT" Jasper and I just stared at Emmett confused at his comment, while he was practically rolling over with laughter. But soon enough his infectious laughter had caught us.

"Emmett, instead of master-not you should have said 'masterful-of-shit'" I said. Jasper and Emmett erupted in laughter then started to applaud me.

"No offense or anything Jasper, I am not doubting your masterful-ness" I finished with a confused look on my face. They were still laughing and I couldn't help but join in.

**EPOV**

I wasn't worried that I had left Bella outside with Emmett and Jasper. I just didn't want to leave her. The house was still booming with music and laughter. So many people, girls – half dressed, boys – over excited, I actually couldn't stand it. I stormed through the house looking for her bag while Alice and Rosalie were shouting a conversation at me over the noise.

"What on earth do you think you are doing Edward? Bringing a homeless girl back to our house!" Rosalie shouted to me.

"Last time I checked Rosalie, it is not your house! It's mine. She isn't just some homeless girl and she is coming with us" I shouted back without looking back at her. The sooner I find Bella's bag, the sooner I am out of here.

"Look guys, please! We don't need to argue about this!" Alice shouted. She hates our group arguing. She was trying to get us to calm down and she was right. I don't want to argue but Bella was coming with me. Luck struck and I had found her bag and was retreating back outside in a rushed silence.

Outside I was greeted with a wonderful sight; Bella was in a fit of laughter with Jasper and Emmett practically rolling over with laughter. I walked up to her and stroked her arm with my free hand. She looked up to me with tears threatening to spill out from her eyes. She wiped them away and smiled brightly at me.

"Mate, she is a keeper!" Emmett exclaimed in between recovering breaths. Jasper gave an understanding wink at me. Bella blushed again, the pink colour fluttered over her white skin. Rosalie was practically steaming she was so angry.

"To the Em-mobile" Emmett said whilst clapping his hands together to get everybody's attention and pointed in the direction of _my_ Volvo.

"I think that you are forgetting that one, it is my car and two, you are not Batman" I replied, Bella giggled beside me, and the rest of them laughed too as we made our way to my car. Alice then begun to chat to Bella, nothing serious, just talking and they both looked happy. Emmett was struggling to calm Rosalie down.

Before we clambered in the car, Bella's face dropped; her smile disappeared. I quickly moved over to her. "I shouldn't be coming home with you. I shouldn't." she was whispering so that my friends couldn't hear her. I started stroking her arms, a lame attempt to calm her down.

"Shush" I cooed but she just shook me of off her.

"I wouldn't even fit in the car, what on earth was I thinking?" Bella said quickly, she was getting more agitated and nervous. It was a rhetorical question but I wanted to know the answer.

"Bella please, please just come with me. I don't know why you are homeless, but I do know that there is no way that you deserve to be. But if you don't want to then just don't, I want you to, please get in my car" I said with sincerity drowning my words. I did want her to come home with me, to be safe and warm. Tears were streaming down her cheeks; I attentively reached forward to stroke them away. She melted into my hand, and held it there with her own.

"I'll come with you" she said, calmly and clearly. Her tears had stopped and a small smile was slinking onto her luscious lips.

**BPOV**

On the way home I was seated at the back next to the door with Emmett in the middle and Alice sitting on Jasper's lap. Rosalie was in the front riding shotgun with Edward driving. His family and friends had been so kind to me, except Rosalie but she had every right to be sceptical. I was just some homeless girl coming into her home. But Edward wanted me there, so I would go. He would keep me safe, which would be a nice change.

My head was pounding; Edward hadn't noticed the grazes and cuts yet. I could sort them out later. I rest my head against the car window as night time Forks whizzed by. I remember so little of Forks, as it'd so long since I had been but I did recognise when we had gone through Forks and were heading out of it.

Suddenly, my eyes had widened and my mouth dropped in awe. Edward was from the gold mine of families. Edward's house was a mammoth, white Victorian-style three story house but it had a definite modern flare to it. One word; amazing – and that didn't even seem to cover it.

"Come on then Bella" Edward gently said whilst twisting to face me from the driving seat. I hadn't noticed that everybody else had left whilst I was silently admiring their home.

"Yeah, sure" I whispered, I didn't mean to but I just didn't have the energy to speak any louder. Cautiously I opened the door and stepped out while he quickly sped around to meet me, guiding me by tightly holding my hand. Every time he touched me it sent shivers throughout my body.

"Let's meet my parents"


	5. Chapter 5 Pleasantries

**BPOV**

I had forgotten that people have parents. Well it had slipped my mind that Edward would have some. To stay at his wonderful home for any length of time I would have to meet them. I had to reassure myself over and over that I could do this.

"Bella, you can do this, trust me. My parents don't bite" I welcomed the reassurance from Edward. He was still carrying my ratty bag; I should have dressed up to not look so homeless.

I followed like a little lamb up to the giant house, it wasn't a long walk but it felt like an age. Edward kept checking up on me with a quick glance over the shoulder with those emerald eyes. I made a mental note to remember 'emerald' as it embodied the true beauty of his eyes. The door was ajar and light streamed onto the front steps. I couldn't here any voices inside. When we reached the threshold Edward put this free hand at the small of my back to lead me in.

The house was astonishing inside too. But I didn't have a chance to admire, because my thoughts were interrupted by a gorgeous woman with an outreaching hand towards me. I looked up at Edward as she spoke. "Oh, hello… Edward I didn't know that we were having a guest tonight" She was terribly polite as she eyed Edward and myself nervously and I shook her hand.

"No Mum neither did I... Bella this is Esme, my mother" Edward beamed proudly. How could he be so cool? Maybe this was something he did a lot, bringing girls home but Esme sounded too surprised for that to be true.

"Nice to meet you" I said while carelessly playing with my hair. Clearly my nerves had gotten the best of me as Esme gasped and I quickly shook my hair back into its protective cover over my wounds. She seemed to shake of her ever growing shock before Edward noticed our short exchange. He was still smiling and his hand on my back slowly moved to grab my hand.

"Right… Oh honey, this is Bella. Edward's friend, she's staying the night apparently" Esme glanced backwards to talk to a very handsome man coming down the stairs. His face quickly whipped to look at Edward's, his eyes full of curiosity. Then his eyes followed Edward's arm to see our hands together. I didn't know what to do; I just looked up to Edward.

**EPOV**

"Yes, she is. Bella this is my Dad, Carlisle" I replied quickly and confidently. I was trying to comfort my parents and Bella with my constant smiles. Bella was clearly nervous, she kept looking up at me for reassurance and it was all I could do to admirer the beauty below me.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you. Sorry to be so intrusive… but why are you staying the night here?" My father hesitated but continued as Bella's face plummeted. Her eyes raced over my face looking for an answer. I nodded quickly and turned back to Carlisle about to respond before Rosalie…

"Oh but Carlisle don't you know? Bella has no where else to go" Rosalie came out of the living room with an evil grin on her face. Clearly proud of what she had done. Esme and Carlisle were gripped with shock.

"I don't think I quite understand dear. Edward?" Esme said quietly, her eyes scanning Bella's and my responses. I can't believe Rosalie. Bella's eyes were welling up and she hid into the back of my shoulder.

"Mum, don't freak. Bella _is_ homeless" I said quickly while glaring at Rosalie, if looks could kill she would be six feet under.

"Edward this is a situation in which I am fully entitled to 'freak' out" Esme warned strongly.

"Mum" I hissed as I turned my attention to Bella's quivering form. She wouldn't let me see her face. I turned back to my parents who were staring in wonder.

"Please" I said desperately. They had to let her stay. My eyes were pleading, and Esme dropped all concerns immediately and rushed over to Bella and started cooing over her.

"Shush darling, you are welcome here" Esme said carefully while wrapping her motherly arms around her, forcing Bella's head onto Esme's shoulder. I finally got to see Bella's tear ridden face and in that moment I knew I could never cause her pain.

**BPOV**

We to the living room after I had calmed down and I felt like such an fool getting so worked up. My emotions were not being kind today.

"Bella, look I don't mean to upset you. But I think its right that we know more about you" Carlisle said diplomatically. They should know, for all they know I could be some psychopath. Luckily I wasn't, so this conversation wouldn't be as awkward as it could be. Edward wasn't sitting next to me; he was leaning against the wall opposite my perch upon one of the sofas. Esme and Alice had taken position sitting next to me. Rosalie had stormed off earlier after seeing that her comment hadn't forced me from the house. But apparently she wasn't far, as this question made her slowly retreat into the room.

"Dad, do you have to?" Edward asked cautiously after my initial silence and hesistation.

"No, its okay; it is only fair. You've been so kind to me" I interrupted whilst staring intently at Edward reassuring him.

"Well, in your own time dear" Esme said calmly while stroking my hand lightly. I withdrew my hand and smiled up at her before studying my dirty hands. Just breathe I told myself.


	6. Chapter 6 Story

**BPOV**

"Right so, okay…" my voice was so shaky but I had to continue, I knew I was safe now. I didn't dare look up at the welcoming family that had let me in without a second thought. I couldn't imagine what they would think about me after they knew who I was.

"I used to live in Phoenix, with my mum and my stepdad. My dad used to live here in Forks, I used to visit like every summer" I heard gasps of breath when realisation over came my audience. Charlie Swan, police chief of Forks, shot two years ago. I continued without looking up. "But that ended when my mum met Phil, she said that I had a new dad now. Phil was a heavy drinker, I mean like seriously heavy. I told mum what he was doing to me… But she just ignored me. Phil started beating my mum and everything spiralled out of control once she lost her job. Soon enough my mum was gone. She was a shell of the women that loved and cared for me. She started drugs, out of desperation I suppose. I couldn't look after her anymore. Then she died, about 6 months ago. But she was gone for so much longer than that"

I had to pause, my breath was running short and I stroked away some tears. Still not daring to look up I just continued. "And that left Phil. He used to come to the house drunk, leave the house stoned. He got so, so angry. He got arrested for drink driving. When he got home he was furious and I had locked myself in my room so he couldn't get to me. But this new anger ran through him, he broke through my door. I screamed and screamed. I started throwing things at him. It only angered him more. He charged towards me. So I launched myself out of my small second storey window." Saying this out loud was harder than I thought. I replay it every night in my head but this was too difficult. My scars were itching with the memories.

"I managed to only break one arm, but I was covered in cuts and bruises. That was the first night that I wasn't at home. I slept in an alleyway not far from my house so when I knew that Phil would be out during the next day I could sneak in and grab my stuff and get out, finally get away." I let out a deep breath, the worst bit was over.

"I came to Forks with part of my college fund that I had been saving myself. But my mum never told me that Charlie had died" I couldn't help it now; tears were streaming from my eyes.

"Oh Bella" Esme cried as she pulled me into a hug. Alice was crying and rubbing my back attentively, Rosalie's face was crippled with sympathy. Emmett, Jasper and Carlisle were shocked. Edward wasn't there. I had made him so ashamed. Who was I to think that he would want a freak like me here?

"Where is Edward?" I asked in a quivering whisper, desperately searching for him around the room.

**EPOV**

Bella; the gorgeous, smart, funny Bella. How could any creature do that to her? I couldn't stand to hear anymore of her story. I should have stayed, to be there for her. But an immense anger poured through my veins, I had to let it out. I ran silently out of there to the garden. I ran to the end. I ran into the forest and beat the closet tree I could find. Bark flying of in all directions. How could anybody do that to her? My hands were a bloody mess when I had to stop for breath. I looked back to the house, through the glass wall at facing me I saw Bella staring at me. Alice at her side stroking her hair, I should have been there. I ran back to her as fast as I could. When I reached her I picked her up, wrapped my arms around her and cooed into her ear.

"I am so sorry Bella. So, sorry. You're safe, I promise. You are safe" I could hear her whimper into my shoulder, she started to shake so I put her down gently.

"I know" she whispered while wiping away her tears, her beautiful face stained with sadness. But she smiled; it was small and only reaching the edges of her brilliant lips.

**BPOV**

I was lying in the bath; Edward was sitting outside on the other side of the door. Talking to me, I insisted that he go and do his own thing, but he had sworn not to leave me. The warm water soothed my whole body, but my head still hurt and I was so tired. Edward kept me awake, and for that I was glad. I don't think I would ever grow tired of hearing his voice.

"Bella?" He called through the door,

"Yeah?" I replied tentatively.

"I have to go and do something real quick. Alice wants me. I'm sorry I'll be right back, okay?" He said apologetically.

"Edward, stop being so daft, of course you can go" I urged. I felt bad for preoccupying his attention. When he left I let my heavy eyelids close. With nothing else distracting me I could concentrate on the pain on my head. I closed my eyes trying to shut it out. I reached up to carefully remove my hair placed in front of my injury. It was warm and moist as I gently touched it. I opened my eyes in alarm and brought my hand down to eye level. Blood, dripping from my forehead; the smell made me instantaneously dizzy and my sight blurred. I felt myself falling quickly into unconsciousness.

**EPOV**

"Hey Bella?" I said as I reached the bathroom door. I didn't get a reply.

"Bella? I'm sorry I took so long" I waited with my ear pressed against the door.

"Seriously Bella? Bella!" I started shouting, I reached for the doorknob and suddenly stopped myself, I couldn't walk in while she was in the bath.

"Alice! Alice" Panic rose within me as I shouted desperately for my sister.

"What Edward? Hey chill, whats up?" She asked as she skipped down the hall towards me.

"Bella, she won't reply" I said nervously. Alice acknowledged the panic in my voice and rushed into the bathroom. I heard Alice gasp.

"Bella, Bella, come on Bella." Alice pleaded with Bella, who seemed unresponsive.

"Alice! What is happening?" I questioned, panic and nerves combining into a hysteria.

"Edward, I can't do it, please come in!" Alice begged and I burst through the door without a second thought to see a soaking Alice and an unconscious Bella lying limp in Alice's arms loosely wrapped in a towel.

"Alice, go and get Carlisle" I demanded as I rushed to take Alice's place supporting Bella. Her head was bleeding badly, a gash next to her hair line, I should have noticed. I immediately felt so guilty for not noticing, fuelling my fear, that and the fact she wasn't breathing…

She wasn't breathing.

"Edward! CPR!" Carlisle shouted up the stairs as I heard him rush around the house. I had performed CPR before; I knew how to do it. But this scared me, too much. She was so lifeless.

"Come on Bella" I begged as I pushed against her chest. Suddenly water spurted from her mouth, and she stared coughing violently.

"Edward" she whispered as her eyes fluttered open. Just then Carlisle stormed in, medical kit in hand. Carlisle ushered me out of the way, I moved gently. "Edward" she gasped as she felt me move.

"It's okay, I'm right here"


	7. Chapter 7 Dreaming

**EPOV**

When Carlisle was done, Bella was so sleepy. Alice had got some stuff from Bella's bag and helped her get dry and dressed. I was still waiting outside in silence just listening to Alice and Bella. They were getting along but I could tell that Alice was being very careful about what she said. The rest of my family had gone off to bed. It was about 3'oclock in the morning when I was carrying Bella to one of our guest rooms. Esme had made the bed and put a glass of water by the lamp on the bed side table.

Bella was stirring lightly in my hold as I was putting her down into bed. "Edward" she whispered as I pulled the covers up.

"Yeah Bella?" I said lightly, I had crouched down so I was at eye level with her though she could barely keep them open.

"I'm sorry" Bella murmured as she slowly moved her hand out of the warmth of the covers and outstretched the little distance to meet my hand on the edge of her bed.

"No, no. You just sleep now, yeah? Sleep now" I whispered back, grazing my fingers over hers.

"But-" She started but I cut her off immediately,

"No Bella, no buts. It is time for sleep" I said playfully. I sat down out of my crouch but my chin was still able to rest on the bed. She was too tired to argue back, so I stroked her head carefully until her breathing slowed pace. Creeping out of her room, I glanced back at her. The bright moonlight shined through the room, making her beautiful skin luminous. She was an angel; her dark mahogany locks spread across the pillow. I felt bad for leaving her, but I was knackered too. But my mind never left her as I dreamt peacefully about her all night.

**BPOV**

_Waking up is always a painful experience in this house. Hold on? This house? Edward, where are you? Why am I back here? _

"_Mum!" I shouted into the darkness. No reply…_

"_Mum! Please, don't leave me!" I shout again. Out of the corner of my eye I catch her, skipping along the white sand. Towards Phil._

"_MUM!" I start running after her, my legs are like lead, sinking in the sand. Come on Bella, you can do this, you can save her. She reaches him and disappears. _

"_NO!" I scream. I drop to my knees and the surroundings change. I'm back in my room. _

"_She's gone now Bella. Good Bella, just open the door now" Phil teases, his voice ran chills down my spin, made my hair stand on end. I stay silent, I creep into the corner. _

"_Oh come on now Bella, we've been through this before" He breaks through the door. Frantically I search the room for my window, my chance for escape. "No where to go Bella" he taunts as he comes closer to me. I can't stop him, I never could. He starts beating and beating me._

"_No Phil! Please stop!" I cry out in desperation. I struggle against the brute force. _

"STOP!" I scream and thrash out my arm to the side as I am propelled into consciousness. Reality hits me and so does the pain in my hand. I look around to see that I had smashed a glass of water with my hand when I woke.

Suddenly Edward bursts through the door, turns on the light to see me sitting straight up in bed, blood slowly dripping from my hand. He races over to me and examines my hand.

"Shit" he whispers,

"I, I-I'm I'm sorry" I said frailly, my voice is so shaky I barely recognise it.

"No, no look. Come on its fine" he reaches up to stroke away my tears caused by the nightmare. He picked me up and carried me through the door, downstairs towards the kitchen.

"Look, you hold you're nose, and wait here. I'll be one second, we need to get the glass out" I complied as he placed me on the counter and raced up the stairs. In no time at all he was back by my side with Carlisle alert and set with his medical equipment.

"Oh Bella, what happened?" Carlisle question as I cringed away from the cold metal of his tweezers. Edward held my head close to his shoulder so I couldn't see what was happening.

"I had a nightmare…" I said once I had more control of my voice.

"Well, you'll be fine. You don't even need any stitches just a couple of bandages." Carlisle had worked quickly to get the class out. "I don't take well to a glass of water at night either Bella" Carlisle said with a playful wink at me, "much prefer some milk" I let out a breath of laughter and Edward had a small smile on his face.

"Sorry for waking you up Carlisle" I said shamefully.

"Oh, don't you think such a thing. I can always go back to sleep; which is in fact what I am planning to do" Carlisle said cheerfully, so welcoming and fatherly it was entrancing.

"Thank you" I said lightly, Carlisle smiled at me before heading out of the kitchen while Edward was still silent.

"I'm sorry Edward, thank you for, well thank you for everything" I looked up at his eyes only to be captured in them. A gorgeous smile grew across his face.

"Anytime" He said with a smile, while helping me off the counter. When we left the kitchen we found Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett waiting for us. I could feel my cheeks go the same shade that Carlisle had just washed down the sink, blood red with embarrassment.

"Bella, are you okay? We heard you… scream" Alice said sheepishly whilst speeding towards me and hugging me.

"Y-yeah I'm good. Just a bit of glass in my hand but Carlisle sorted me out so I am well I'm sorted I guess" Emmett let out a chuckle at me stumbling around my words but smiled generously.

"Well, not to be rude or anything but Batman needs some" Emmett said whilst rubbing his hands together. Rosalie elbowed him in the stomach and gave me a sympathetic smile.

"Bella, I think you should count your self lucky" we all paused in silence as Rosalie spoke directly to me, for the first time. "I have to LIVE with my nightmare" she continued, pointing at Emmett with a distinct 'duh" expression. Laughter started again but I was excited and relieved that she offered an olive branch of reconciliation.

"I'm not that bad am I?" Emmett said with 'play' sad-face, sulking in Rosalie's direction.

"No, of course not darling…" Rosalie said with confusion smeared across her face. We were all laughing until Esme called down for us to go back to sleep. "Alright Mum" they called up in unison. We all made our way up the stairs with me and Edward trailing at the back. Once we reached the top of the stairs Alice turned to me to give me another big hug.

"You're going to be okay you know that right?" she said lightly to me while holding my arms. I nodded silently and Alice skipped off to her room as she left me and Edward standing at the top of the stairs.

"You sure you're okay?" Edward murmured to me in the new silence of the house.

"Yeah, I'm fine Edward I promise. Phil doesn't come if I have my iPod on, I just forgot tonight" I said self-consciously, shuffling awkwardly at my vulnerability.

"It was Phil? In your nightmare?" he asked cautiously. He looked so upset and concerned.

"Yeah, sorry." I whispered, looking down at my feet nervously.

"Why do you always apologise? It isn't your fault. It kills me to think that you had to live through that" Edward said whilst trying to encourage eye contact. I had started to well up in my eyes, they were about to over flow but Edward grabbed my hand and pulled it up to his lips. The gentle pressure of his lips upon my knuckles was beautifully calming. "Come on, back to bed with you, like Emmett said Batman needs his sleep" Edward said playfully, leading me back to my temporary room.

"I'm not Batman?" I said confused, but with a smile on my face, joining the joke.

"As soon as you get to sleep, so can I" Edward said with a wink to me.

He watched as I rummaged through my ratty bag to find my iPod, as I clambered into the warm comfort of my bed and as I shuffled around to get even more comfortable. "You set now?" Edward said softly as he crouched down by the bedside. I hadn't noticed how tired I still was until now. I merely nodded as I let out a small yawn.

"I take that as a yes then. Goodnight Bella" he stroked my hair from my face before staring into my eyes. There was an emotion embedded in them that I couldn't describe. He merely shook his head, once he was at the door he turned to look at me again before he closed the door. I turned over onto my back to start searching through my iPod, when I finally decided the music lulled me into a peaceful sleep.


	8. Chapter 8 Breakfast

**EPOV**

I slept soundly once again. When I heard her earlier screaming in the dead of night, it scared the life out of me! It frightened me to think that she could be in danger to her under my protection. Her fragile form when I stormed into the room. Her eyes were red with fresh tears, her hand dripping with blood against the white sheets, the glass shattered across the floor, the glass wedged in her hand, and her hair was wild tangled in distress.

Her imagination and memories hurt her so much. I dreaded to think of what that devil of a man had once done to her. After I had been assured that she wouldn't be waken like that again I fell into another dream about Bella.

I woke up surprisingly prompt in the morning, straight on nine o'clock. I slowly meandered downstairs, assuming that nobody else would be up when I noticed Esme was with Bella in the kitchen. They were sitting at the table talking; Bella had a glass of milk and she was spinning it lightly with her fingertips while Esme was looking at her intently.

"So, Renee what was she like, before?" Esme asked carefully, obviously wary but Bella smiled brightly in response.

"She was so beautiful; her eyes were the deepest blue. She was tan and freckles dotted all over her face. I remember she was so erratic and happy all the time. I used to think that she glowed. We used to take walks along the beaches at night, because it was so warm and beautiful with the wind lightly tickling our faces." Bella's eyes had slightly glazed over in the memories. I resisted the urge to run up and wipe the tears away but I waited outside, letting the moment continue.

"Oh Bella, she sounds wonderful" Esme said happily, reaching her hand out to rest lightly on top of Bella's.

"Yeah" She said, I had to look back in, her lips had curled up at the memory of her mother.

"You should remember the better things Bella. I can't even try to imagine what you have been through, but I could imagine that it is imprinted in your memory forever. But try to concentrate on the better things to remember instead. Like the beautiful mother you've been describing. It would be so dreadful if you were to forget her the way she should be remembered" Esme was so motherly; she radiated warmth and love wherever she went.

"Thank you so much Esme" Bella's voice was so beautiful even when she whispered.

"Don't need to be thanking me, I would do anything for my family and it seems Edward has taken to you… A lot" Oh no, Esme had crossed the line! I could practically hear Bella blush. She did choke slightly on her milk though. It was time for intervention.

"Oh hey, I didn't think any body else was up?" I said – no one will ever know I thought to myself smugly. I beamed at Bella and she smiled back.

"Oh, is that right?" Esme said with an eyebrow raised so high I thought it was about to run of her forehead. Mothers always know everything, and best.

"Yeah that is right, Mum" I replied warningly, she knew I had been waiting outside.

"Enjoying your milk?" I chanted to Bella as I glided into the seat next to her.

"Yeah, its good milk?" she said with an adorable confused face and a casual laugh. The worries of last night had seemed to disappeared.

"Well, Edward you ears must have been burning my boy. We were just talking about you" Esme nearly sang as I silently pleaded with my mother to stop. Bella's mouth dropped and simultaneously blushed furiously.

"Great Mum… That's great to know thanks" I said gruffly, trying to avoid the conversation as best I could.

"Oh don't worry dear, anytime" Esme said smugly whilst leaving the room with a playful wink.

"I am so sorry. Appalling behaviour from my mother there" I apologised jokingly, shaking my head.

"No, not at all, she is really kind. She actually helped me sort some stuff out" she said shyly then took a sip of her milk. She was so adorable it made my heart melt.

"Oh, that's good then. Would you like some breakfast?" I said cheerfully wandering towards the fridge.

"I can make my own breakfast, you don't need to do that for me too" she replied playfully watching me from her perch.

"No yeah sure, you go ahead – do you need a map?" I teased, leaning on the counter, folding my arms smugly.

"What do you mean? I clearly have been homeless for too long, what goes into your breakfasts?" She replied mockingly as she walked towards me

"No Bella, do you have any clue as to where anything in my kitchen is?" I replied, mimicking her mocking tone.

"Ah that I don't" she said retreating back into her seat sheepishly.

"So I will continue yes?" I offered with a small but victorious laugh. She only nodded in reply; holding her milk with both hands, drinking slowly from it.

"Please" Bella asked politely, placing her glass on the table – still not finished. I hunted around the fridge, suddenly remembering that I can't cook.

"Bella I have just remembered something vital in order to produce a breakfast" I admitted shamefully.

"What's that then?" she said playfully, intrigued by my statement. Her eyes were wide with amusement.

"Well… I can't cook" I stated, shyly looking down at my feet.

"Oh dear brother, it's lucky that your brilliant sister can?" Alice chimed, sliding into the room with Jasper hot on her heels. Alice gave Bella a wide smile and glared jokily at me, waiting for me to agree.

"Of course, what would I do without you?" I appeased whilst rolling my eyes, walking back over to Bella. Alice instructed Jasper, Bella and I to sit down and be patient whilst she got to work. We soon were supplied with a giant pile of homemade pancakes.

"Quick! Eat quickly before Emmett gets a whiff of them" Alice urged whilst placing them in the middle of the table.

"Too late!" Emmett declared from the threshold of the kitchen and he almost pounced at the table in a single stride. Rosalie followed swiftly, we began to talk aimlessly and laugh at Emmett's eating habits. I wasn't paying much attention to the conversation; I was to preoccupied watching Bella as she ate slowly and delicately. She was joining in and smiling, so brightly. It was such a perfect and settling image, Bella sitting in front of our glass wall with our green garden and trees in the background with the sun beaming in, while she was smiling and chatting vibrantly. I was trying to memorise the image before it changed.

"So children, what are you doing today?" Carlisle interrupted, entering the room. Alice's face beamed and Rosalie had a menacing yet playful smirk on her face. I knew what they had in mind immediately.

"No. Nuh-uh none of that yet" I said sternly to Alice and Rosalie.

"But come on! Who knows she might enjoy it?" Alice moaned. Bella's confusion increased as her eyebrows furrowed together, her eyes racing around the table.

"What? Please, let me in?" Bella said pleadingly, I couldn't resist those wide, wanting eyes.

"They want to take you shopping" I admitted solemnly. Simultaneously Jasper and Emmett physically cringed while Alice and Rosalie leant in eagerly for Bella's response.


	9. Chapter 9 Relax

**BPOV**

After much debate, we didn't go shopping and I was overjoyed. I would have enjoyed some time to get to know the girls. I hate shopping; it makes me feel bad as consequence of my homelessness. I have no money and ultimately no means of getting any money. I am worthless while Alice and Rosalie are beautiful; I have never seen any body more perfect than those two were. They wear brilliant clothes, all designer labels, not that I have ever seen any but I could tell. I just didn't like shopping.

We had decided to have a film day and just relax after the hectic night last night. Slowly we clambered up the stairs and separated our ways before meeting back downstairs. Edward was being really kind and considerate; always looking after me, his smile always shined brightly, his little touches made my skin tinkle. I threw on a pair of washed out blue denim jeans and an old "Gun's and Roses" tee that was handed down from Charlie one summer when I had forgotten to pack any pyjamas. Time had taken its toll and the sleeves were ripped, making the arm holes long. I had to wear a black boob tube underneath to cover any indecency. Quickly I tied my wild hair back into a high and slightly loose ponytail as I made my way downstairs.

"Woah, Bella – you look positively editorial!" Alice said to me whilst I wandered down the stairs, suddenly paralysed by what I presumed was a compliment.

"Really?" I questioned shyly re-examining my outfit; a simple combination of a baggy top and jeans.

"Yeah! You totally have that wind blown and interesting thing going, you know the whole rock n' roll thing." Alice chirped happily from her seat.

"Gun's and Roses, that is pretty hard core, where did you get that?" Emmett asked from the far end of the room.

"It used to be my Dad's… He gave it to me years ago" I replied hesitantly always conscious of talking about my father.

"Well, your Dad was pretty cool" Emmett exclaimed and simultaneously everybody else glared at him in shock.

"I guess I wouldn't know Emmett" I said back, a smile on my face but my heart was aching with the truth that I didn't know my father at all.

"S*** I'm sorry Bella I didn't even think" Emmett quickly retracted with genuine concern as Edward rushed to my side to hold my un-bandaged hand delicately.

"Emmett, it's cool I promise, I don't mind" I tried to reassure as Edward was stroking circles on my hand with his thumb he had learnt in a short time that he could reassure me with his gentle touches.

"When do you ever?" Jasper quipped, smiling happily to himself.

"Sorry, what Jasper?" Rosalie finally said after we shared confused glances, we were all in silence after Jasper's confusing comment.

"Emmett never thinks? You know when he said 'I didn't even think'. Well I said 'When do you ever?' like a joke?" Jasper defended.

"Ah, funny guy Jasper!" Emmett retorted while sinking into his chair.

"I can't believe you guys didn't get that" Jasper said in genuine disbelieve, raising his arms and bringing them down dramatically.

"Jasper, darling – we get it, you were just a bit slow on the up take there" Alice patronised delicately, patting him on the head while he growled playfully at her.

We were only sitting down for three minutes beginning to settle, discussing our film choices, before Carlisle came in.

"Okay guys, we are going for comedy, Monty Python with The Life of Brian, or The Notebook?" Emmett was sitting nearest the television, searching through the DVDs.

"Emmett, the Notebook isn't a comedy" Rosalie stated blatantly, moving towards him to take a look at the films.

"Oh, but I found it so funny" Emmett joked with a quick slap from Rosalie in response to round the back of his head while she playfully winked to the rest of us.

"Monty Python it is then" Emmett submitted whilst rubbing his head with a soppy expression.

"Hooray, that didn't take long – nice work with the decision making" Edward chirped sarcastically rolling his eyes. I looked up at him laughing and he winked back down at me.

"Bella?" Carlisle said, stealing all of our attention as we turned to him.

"Yeah?" I replied cautiously, thoughts suddenly ran through my mind, causing panic to rise inside me; like maybe he wanted me to leave.

"Can I talk to you quickly?" Carlisle asked, gesturing away from everyone else. I stood up slowly and nodded. Edward looked scared, his eyes wide with questions. I tried to reassure him as I removed my hand from his grasp as I followed Carlisle.

**EPOV**

Alice was right earlier, Bella did look amazing and unique. Bella was too beautiful, she looked happy and bright. Her Gun's and Roses tee was ripped down the side exposing her flat white stomach and even though she was under nourished she was still radiant.

When we had sat down, I made sure to get the sofa so that Bella could sit next to me but without being uncomfortable. Rosalie was sitting on Emmett's lap on the floor rummaging through our wide DVD selection and Alice was cradled against Jasper's chest on the big chair against the opposite wall.

"Can I talk to you quickly?" My father asked politely to Bella but I was desperate to not leave her side. When she had gotten up and followed him, I sulked while watching Monty Python, despite the nearly contagious laughter from my friends I didn't laugh once. In such a short time I was so accustomed to Bella's presence.

It was at least half way through the film when Bella came back. I could tell she was trying to look happy. Bella sat close to me and crossed her legs on the sofa while fiddling with her hands furiously. It was obvious she had something on her mind, anybody could tell. But as we continued to watch the film, she slowly began to relax. I had been completely preoccupied in looking at Bella; subconsciously I would find myself paralysed in her beauty, only stirred out of it by sporadic laughter.

The day whizzed by so quickly, Bella had shuffled her head onto my lap after lunch – which consisted of a 'healthy' proportion of sugar. We watched several other films, which entertained to an extent but we soon grew restless and began talking between each other, joking and laughing and at the end of every single one we continued to discuss in depth which one to watch next.

Jasper and Rosalie left after dinner; watching my siblings make out with there other halves was not particularly pleasant. I could tell Bella was thinking the same thing as she stood with her arms crossed while she bit at her nails, an awkward and impatient trait I hadn't seen yet but still adored.

After they were gone, Bella confessed that she was tired and while she got ready for bed, Emmett had challenged me to a quick 'Call of Duty' Xbox session. He won by a sneaky five-point kill when I was momentarily distracted as Bella was walking down the stairs; she had plaited her glorious hair and wore a plain white vest top with grey cotton bottoms, devoured with holes another display of the harm she had suffered. Bella stood patiently at the bottom of the stairs like a child with her fingers fidgeting together at arms length near the hem of her long shorts.

"Ha, I won! Edward, bow to me!" Emmett cheered as I stood up and walked towards Bella, dismissing Emmett's jeers.

"Heya" I said quietly to Bella as I seized her hands and intertwined my fingers into hers delicately, she still stood above me on the couple of steps remaining on the stairs.

"Dude, can you not hear me? I beat you! I beat you bad" Emmett taunted me, coaxing me.

"Oh Emmett, you masterful being. It would be a privilege to bow at your feet" I caved and said sarcastically but Emmett and Bella both giggled at masterful. I had obviously missed the joke but Emmett was trudging past us with a big grin on his face.

"Thought so too" He said whilst patting me on the head patronisingly, passing Bella on the stairs and not looking back he went up to his room.

"That was your fault you know" I teased Bella

"I only wanted some milk?" Bella chanted and her face was flawlessly innocent with the exception of a tiny devilish flick of a smile in the corner of her scrumptious lips.


	10. Chapter 10 Empty

**BPOV**

Edward had provided milk, walked me upstairs, tucked me into bed, kissed my knuckles and stroked my hair before he left me in the cool moonlight to sleep. He had been so generous in all that he had given me adding to his perfection. He was godly; his beautiful hair, so untamed, his features were perfect, his skin was flawless and his body was toned and muscular. These were aesthetic features, inside he was kind, generous, caring, intelligent. My insecurities rose as I compared Edward to myself and saw how truly unequal we were.

I decided not to lull on that question anymore; far to depressing for my current state of happiness. I set my iPod to shuffle, and the first song was Guns and Roses, "Sweet Child O' Mine", I thought it was exceedingly fitting especially after my conversation earlier with Carlisle…

"_Bella, I'm sorry to interrupt your very important film day" he said playfully, gesturing towards the living room._

"_I think I will cope" I tried to laugh in return but the panic was rising as the light conversation dwindled_

"_The way Emmett is about DVD's you cannot take it so lightly" he hesitated as the serious talk loomed overhead. "I heard Emmett's comment earlier, about your father Charlie?" I nodded solemnly as he continued, "I've been thinking and I have discussed it with Esme. We think that it would be a good idea for you to learn more about your father?" Carlisle suggested tentatively and I immediately loved the idea, to learn about him so I couldn't forget him. _

"_I would love to Carlisle" I said hopefully. _

"_I don't think I could provide you with the information you need Bella. I could take you down to the police station tomorrow, so you could talk to some of his old colleagues, I know that he had great friends down there." Tears were falling slowly from my eyes but they weren't from sadness, I was excited and hopeful._

"_Oh thank you, that would be really great" I said gratefully, finally wiping away the stray tears running down my cheeks. _

"_Oh come here" Carlisle said with outstretched arms and I walked into a warm hug. "You are a brilliant person Bella, so was your father". Carlisle chanted much like Esme would have. They were well suited in every aspect, so caring and paternal it was a strange but welcoming feeling._

I woke at the break of dawn with the beautiful sunlight shining through the large glass wall. Their house was so beautiful, waking up to see the bright green grass and every other tone of green was scattered in the forest. I stood and got out of the bed slowly. It was only five in the morning, Carlisle said we would leave at seven. I sat on the floor at the end of the glass wall, placed my head against the cool glass and contemplated what I was about to do.

I had never really put any thought into what I wear because it never mattered before but today was different, today was important. I shook all of the contents of my bag upon the floor. I found my least scrappy pair of jeans which were depressingly still hole ridden and settled on a plain white round neck long sleeve t-shirt. I unravelled my hair from the plait and I studied myself in the long mirror resting against the wall. I concluded that I was nothing like my mother; she was tall, I was short; she was tanned while I was had a ghostly complexion; she had freckles, my skin was a plain canvas; her hair was as blonde and bright as the sun, and my hair was a deep dark brown. We were complete opposites and shared nothing in common except the love that we once shared for one another.

I silently made my way downstairs, careful not to wake anybody. I poured myself a half glass of milk and sat at the table with my iPod playing a classical track in the background to ease my mind. I had just finished my milk and was playing with the glass when Carlisle walked in.

"You ready?" Carlisle asked carefully.

"Yu-huh" I said cautiously, I got up and placed my glass in the sink, avoiding his gaze.

**EPOV**

Nine o'clock again and I knew Bella would be up already. I had also dreamed of Bella in my flawless sleep; I had taken her to my meadow and we lay there while the world whizzed by, our time had stopped and her skin sparkled under the delicate moonlight. I got up quickly and strode downstairs expecting to find Bella sitting in the kitchen but she wasn't there.

"Edward, honey, good morning" My adoring mother called as I raced past her going back upstairs. I ran back up to Bella's room. The door was wide open; her things were spread all over the room. Panic instantly poured through my veins as questions ran through my mind.

"Mum, Mum!" I shouted in confusion, running back down the stairs.

"Yes, my dear, good morning to you to" Mum teased as she didn't seem to gauge the severity of the situation, my Bella was missing. The subconscious title of 'my Bella' did cross my mind but was quickly overthrown by worry.

"Mum, where is Bella?" I asked with panic flooding my words as I gripped tightly onto the countertop.

"Oh Edward, she has gone with Carlisle." Esme admitted solemnly from across the room, her voice fluctuating with guilt.

I thought to myself that the floor in the hallway facing the front door happens to be very comfortable as I had been anxiously awaiting Bella's return. I had breakfast. I had showered. I got dressed. I was on the Xbox with Emmett for a period of time. I had had lunch too and I had talked to Alice. Soon I was left with nothing to do but to wait. I was occupying my time by supporting the wall with my back opposite the front door.

A car approached and my thoughts began to race excitedly with the prospect of Bella's return. I just wanted her safe, safe preferably in my arms. I tried to justify my unreasonable claims on Bella, in the dangers of the outside world. What if she returned and her hair smelt different? That question was quickly dismissed as ridiculous as I straightened my back and listened carefully. They entered the house in silence, Bella entered first. She was carrying a big brown leather trunk with Carlisle following closely behind with his gaze remaining on the floor, with a fatherly hand guiding her on her back. I immediately jumped up and walked to her side as she was struck motionless when she had entered.

"Hey" Bella muttered timidly adding an unconvincing small smile she had on her shaking lips. I searched her face thoroughly for the truth; her chocolate eyes cried out with pain, but she blinked furiously and shrugged out of my hold.

"Bella?" I called as she was walking up the stairs, away from me as she struggled with her mysterious case. "Dad?" I asked desperately as he was walked away too, I spoke louder "Hey, Dad?" he turned and gently shook his head sympathetically.


	11. Chapter 11 Memories

**BPOV**

The car journey had been silent and I was thankful for that as it gave me a chance to sort out my incoherent thoughts. I sat staring at the building in front of me; I barely recognised it even though I knew that it had never changed.

"Bella?" Carlisle said cautiously, instead of replying I just turned and tried focused my attention as I couldn't trust my voice to be audible, let alone strong.

"Take your time okay. I'll be right here" Carlisle reassured, undoing his seatbelt and rearranged himself in the seat.

"Yeah… Thanks Carlisle" I said uncertainly while getting out of the car. We had discussed that yesterday and decided I had to do by myself. Carlisle had phoned the station and explained that I was going to visit. Walking through the doors I felt the eyes crawl up and down my body in confusion and sometimes sympathy. A big man came up to me and I instinctually flinched at the closeness and he backed away a little and I relaxed quickly.

"Isabella?" He asked carefully, lowering himself slightly to my eye level. I nodded in response. His voice was completely indifferent to me. He noticed my lack of acknowledgement and sighed, "Let's go and talk yeah?"

I had been listening to this man talk about my Dad for at least two hours, while I sat there mostly in silence, but sometimes I laughed, smiled and even asked questions. He described him as a strong courageous man and described him in such detail. He told me about how Charlie could lead the team so easily and successfully and about how he used to joke about having no cooking skills. Charlie used to talk about me all the time, showing off pictures of me. The man had asked if I wanted to know about his death, I refused profusely. I only wanted to know about how he lived. I had been crying silent tears of happiness at the heartfelt memories.

"So I guess you'll be visiting Sue next?" He asked presumptuously.

"Who?" I asked curiously, he took a sharp intake of breath. "Seriously who?" I persisted while he fiddled with his hands. "Please, you have been so helpful" I begged, he truly had been. A man that had been so close to my father had reincarnated him through stories and anecdotes, so much so that I would be forever grateful.

"Charlie remarried" He said apologetically and my heart caught in my throat as my thoughts stopped.

Learning that my father remarried caused my heart to selfishly break a little, he had every right to. After the pain that Renee had caused him he deserved to be happy. But it made me feel forgotten; that he had moved on. I wasn't surprised that I didn't know. Charlie hopefully invited me to the wedding but I had been severely restricted in terms of my contact with the outside world.

I told Carlisle when I got back into the car that I had another stop and he knew where he was going while I barely remembered. When we pulled up at the same house I had grown up in memories hit heavily as I stared at the familiar house. The place I had loved escaping to during the summer, the house that I prayed and ached to be when Phil beat me and when my Mum died.

The house maintained so much life while the man who made it a home for me was six feet under; this realisation brought floods of tears to my eyes, so much so I thought I could down until I looked back to Carlisle who couldn't bring himself to look at me. This guilt caused me to rub the tears from my drowning eyes and hurry to the door. I stood waiting at the door for my confidence to catch up with me before knocking on the door. Finally I shakily I knocked and waited for what felt like an eternity.

An average sized woman opened the door, she was very cautious as she eyed me with wide, gentle brown eyes. She had every right to be, in this state I was the epitome of homeless when I came bearing tear stains, bandages, stitches and hole ridden clothing.

"Sorry can I help you?" she asked politely after we had been silently taking in one another.

"I'm Isabella Swan" I whispered, nearly inaudible but she heard me and gasped in shock. She was careful not to touch me although her arms noticeably twitched to encompass me but she just opened the door wider and stood behind it, gesturing me to enter.

"I am so sorry Bella" she pulled me into a hug as soon as I was inside, the all too familiar settings were now overwhelming me and sent me into another round of unstoppable tears cradled into her arms.

Sue had told me everything about my father, she told me about how kind and adoring his was, about how much I reminded her of him; we had the same hair, the same smile. Sue frequently paused just to look at me, I often caught her gaze as I looked around the living room.

"Bella, I know you must think that he forgot about you. But he never did. Here come with me" Sue said calmly after she had finished talking. She led me up the stairs to my old room.

"Please understand, he kept it the same for so many years, waiting for you. He never stopped thinking about you. But once he had died, and you never came. I had your things packaged. They are all still here, but I didn't know that you were going to come back. I'm truly sorry." She pleaded with such sincerity; I nodded, preparing myself for what was on the other side and I took a deep deliberate breath as she opened the door.

The walls were the same colour; the layout was exactly how I remember it. My bed was still there, with boxes piled up, all over the room, the wooden rocking chair that Charlie had sat in to read to me and watch me sleep. In the middle of my bed sat a big leather trunk. I walked up to it, instinctually stroked the top where "SWAN" was imprinted on the top. I looked back to Sue for permission, she nodded slowly. Her eyes welling up, I was still crying. "It belongs to you, he said, he left it for you. He believed with all his heart you were going to come back" Sue said with her voice getting caught, she finished in a whisper as my heart ached.

Carlisle drove me back to the house in silence after Sue had talked some more and generously told me that I come back anytime. I genuinely thought that she was a wonderful person and I was ecstatic that Charlie had been able to find somebody to make him happy. I was cradling the still unopened trunk in my lap; it didn't feel right to open it in front of any one.

When we pulled up to the house I only now remembered Edward, I had been so preoccupied and now I had even more to think about. I didn't want to drag him into this, and I wanted to do it on my own. "Bella," Carlisle's voice shook me into the present and I turned back to Carlisle.

"Yeah?" I replied gently, I still felt so vulnerable.

"I am really proud of you. It was a big thing to do today. Now, do you want help with that?" Carlisle offered politely but I shook my head.

"No, it's okay, thank you" I replied as I didn't want to or couldn't let go of it. Charlie had left it for me and for me alone, for when I came back. I've finally returned and he isn't here. Carlisle led me in and I found Edward was sitting at the opposite wall, waiting for me. I moved forward fractionally. He jumped up towards me, his eyes plastered with confusion. Guilt pulled at my heart because I had left him here without a word.

"Hey" I muttered, I knew I hadn't convinced him in my attempt to reassure him. The weight in my hands was weighing down on my mind. He stared at me intently, his hands on my arms. Edward's eyes raced over my face, searching for the answers; I couldn't give answers that I didn't know myself. I shrugged him off and walked away. It was hard, I never believed it would hurt to walk away from anyone but I had to do this, on my own, "Bella?" he called out desperately behind me, it killed me not to turn around and I struggled up the stairs.

Once in my room, I placed the trunk down carefully on my bed as I moved all of the clothes to a pile in the corner so I could place the trunk on the floor beneath the glass wall. I cautiously sat in front of it and tried to calm down; "just breathe Bella" I thought to myself as I reached for the rusted buckles. The trunk was full of photo albums, old pictures, CDs, my drawings, old books, picture books, and toys. I recognised only few things; the sight caused my breath to catch in my throat with immense sadness. In a netted pocket on the inside of the lid there was a letter with my name on the front. When I brought it out, there was CD attached to it; Maroon 5, and I let out small exasperated laugh. I found the CD player that was on the shelf opposite the bed and it started playing softly as I read the letter;

_Dearest Bells, _

_Oh, you know that I am not one for words. But I have to do this, I guess. Bells, I have missed you so much. Not being with you, not hearing from you kills me. I don't know what to say. Oh god I really don't. There is so much that I want to say, I just can't get it out. This trunk, this heap of crap it's yours Bella. I have collected this stuff. It is everything that you have ever left here, it's the toys I have given you, and it is the books that I read to you. I hope that you treasure this… I wish I had a chance to treasure you like you should have been. _

_I hope you can read this, I'm getting a bit old and emotional I hope you understand. Bells, I will always love you so much. _

_Yours forever, Dad _

**EPOV**

She had been up there for hours and I hated not knowing. Carlisle had finally explained that she had gone to learn about her father. I knew this would be such a painful experience and I needed to be there for her but Carlisle told me that it was something she had to do on her own. When it was time for dinner, I pounced at the opportunity to go and see her. I stormed up to her room, three steps at a time. I heard her crying. I couldn't be patient if she was upset. I edged the door open fractionally to see her reflection in the window, an image that was heart breaking.

"Bella, oh Bella" I echoed as I entered and moved swiftly towards her.

"Why didn't he come to get me? I needed him? I needed him so much." Bella pleaded rhetorically. She was crying so much, struggling to breath, coughing out the tears. I moved myself underneath her so I could cradle her as her head rested on my shoulder. My eyes welled up at her pain; she was so upset, so destroyed. We sat so still in the quiet while she was shook. ",Come on Bella, dear Bella, shush" I cooed repeatedly into her hair by her ear. She had clearly run out of tears and finally she turned to me, she didn't need to say anything. I stretched my neck to kiss her forehead. Then I delicately stroked her hair out of her beautiful face.

"Dinner is ready" I said finally, with a comforting smile.

"I don't want to go" she said, even though she had finally recovered for now. Her scars ran so much deeper. "Do you want to see what he left me?" she offered pointing to the trunk. It warmed by heart to see that she wanted to share this with me, to share Charlie with me.

"Of course" I answered enthusiastically as she wiggled out of my grip she looked back at me and patted her legs, urging me to join her.

"Come on, here we go, over here. Come on" Bella taunted me playfully. But I complied as she pointed to where I was to sit. I sat down, she joined me by returning to my lap, and wrapped my arms around her while she fiddled with things within her trunk, showing me this and that, talking about Charlie and about the happy aspects of her childhood.

"Thank you Edward" Bella interrupted herself showing me a little teddy bear. She put it back and leant her head against my chest and intertwined her fingers in mine.


	12. Chapter 12 Sunrise

**BPOV**

"Hey Bella! Guess who woke up before you?" Edward's voice teased from close by as my eyes fluttered open.

"Well done Edward, wouldn't it have been enough too meet you downstairs with your giant smug grin on your face instead of actually waking me up in the process?" I moaned playfully, sitting up gradually to face him.

"No I don't think so, this is much more satisfying" he said playfully whilst shuffling out of the way. I swung my legs out of bed so they were hanging off the side. "We have important things to talk about today" Edward warned.

"We do? I questioned, I would love nothing more than to wake up each day to see his face and talk with him all day, but the use of _important_ worried me a little.

"Oh yes, very important. You realise you have been staying here for about two weeks now?" Edward said, taking in my room. These last two weeks had been some of the best I remember because Edward's family had been so kind, giving and funny. Alice and Rosalie hadn't gotten the chance to get me shopping; I call him a pessimist when he tells me it's only a matter of time. Esme and Carlisle are painfully nice to me, when I wake up early in the mornings Esme is always up soon after and comes to talk to me; sometimes we talk about serious things, sometimes its just banter.

"Yu-huh" I said groggily, finally standing up to collect my things to go to the shower. He then took my place where I had been sitting to watch me scramble around in my bag.

"Well, this wasn't the point, but why don't you unpack?" Edward asked, clearly side-tracked, wavered from the "important" conversation.

"Oh sure I'll do it later" I said distractedly while shuffling around in my bag. "What was your point then?" I asked curiously

"It's nearly the end of the summer break Bella" Edward stated.

"Oh, do you want me to leave?" I asked casually, while inside I sent myself into frenzy. He immediately stood and walked towards me.

"Why on earth would I ask you to unpack if I wanted you to leave?" he asked, shocked at my ignorant question whilst dragging me to stand in front of him.

"Oh, right yeah I guess" I said flippantly, trying to dismiss my question as quickly as possible.

"Right, no Bella I do not want you to leave. It's about school" Edward said hesitantly, waiting for my reaction.

"Oh brilliant" I said sarcastically and my face dropped immediately.

"You are so dramatic" he said teasingly, pulling me into a hug. "Everybody needs to learn Bella" he whispered into my ear causing shivers to run through me.

"But I don't wanna" I whined like a baby, pulling away from Edward slightly, so his hands were still wrapped around my back and I tried my best to look adorable with puppy-dog eyes.

"Noo no, that is not going to work this time" Edward said sternly while smiling brightly.

"But-" I tried to interject but he immediately cut me off.

"That's enough from you Missy; you are coming to school with us when term starts. Carlisle has been very sneaky and has already enrolled you. We drew straws on who had to tell you, I'm just unlucky I guess" He said and grinned at me wickedly. All I wanted to do was lean in two inches and connect our lips. But our relationship was complex, I didn't even know if he wanted to be like that with me. For now, I thought teasingly to myself. I wiggled out of Edwards grip and shuffled into the shower with a playfully hurt look directed at Edward for his traitorous behaviour. He chuckled as I mimed slamming the door, careful not to make any noise as everyone else was asleep.

"Edward" I chimed through the bathroom as I knew he'd be close by.

"Yes?" he replied because he barely left my side and I wanted him to stay with me.

"What is the time?" I said cautiously as I prepared for a quick shower. I heard him giggling to himself. "Edward" I warned.

"Dearest Bella, it is four thirty in the good old A.M" Edward said mischievously as my jaw fell.

"Why _dearest _Edward, am I up at four thirty in the 'good old A.M'?" I said with light-hearted venom running along my words.

"Because, when I said it was nearly the end of summer break I meant that we are going back to school tomorrow. And Alice and Rosalie have demanded that they take you shopping, but I have some where very special to show you, I want to do it today, so I figured four thirty would be just fine. Now would you please get in the shower, and meet me downstairs, oh and wear comfortable shoes" He finally admitted and dropped a bombshell. I heard him scampering off the stairs, to safety.

When I was done and squeaky clean, I hopped out of the shower and fled back into my room. Edward was right, I should unpack I thought to myself as I surveyed the heaps of clothes piled around the room. I looked out my faded black skinny jeans, and a blue checked shirt, all my clothes reminded me of how I looked so homeless. My clothes looked shabby, too small, worn and were always either ripped or were ridden with holes. I looked at myself again and reluctantly made my way downstairs.

As I reached the kitchen, I rested against the threshold to watch Edward panicking over the kitchen. He was wearing a black t-shirt with a long v-neck and a shabby pair of blue jeans. He looked effortlessly handsome, the black and blue contrasted perfectly with his wild bronze hair.

"Edward I never asked for proof that you can't cook" I said sweetly, moving closer to him.

"Oh I see, I try and do something nice and get mocked. Fine I'll never do anything nice ever again." He stropped, throwing his arms dramatically.

"Not like that you silly boy" I said playfully as I reached his side I looked down in horror at he had created.

"Is it that bad?" Edward questioned shyly, upon seeing my reaction.

"What is that?" I teased.

"Fine I'm terrible!" He confessed happily and we both laughed at his hideous creation.

"Promise me something" I said whilst turning back to him.

"What's that?" he said turning to me, suddenly alert by the lack of space between us. He looked down to consider just how close we were and looked back with a glorious smile.

"Never ever cook again"

**EPOV**

Bella was so perfect. I know that she would never see herself the way that I do. Once we had joked about my complete lack of catering skills we headed out. She was so adorable when she was confused; her eyebrows furrowed together and she frequently stretched out her hands to signal me to wait for her. I did as I was told and she grabbed onto my arm. With Bella holding my arm we made our way into the forest at the left side of the garden. We reached the meadow just before sunrise. I continued to walk into the middle as Bella just stared open mouthed at the edge.

"Oh Edward, it is beautiful" Bella said in complete awe. It truly was, I had found this place one day whilst trekking through the forests with our family. It was so green, so colourful, the canopy of trees above created the perfect protection from the rain. The floor was dotted with blue bells, which instantly reminded me of Bella as she looked perfect in blue. I chuckled to myself at this realisation and Bella was slowly walking towards me.

"How long do we have left?" Bella asked, we had been lying in the meadow for two hours. The sun rise was magnificent, it glowed bright yellow, the light hitting Bella's face softly and her smile was as radiant as the sun. She had described to me how happy the sun and warmth made her. I had brought my iPod and docking station and let it play softly in the background. She had shuffled over and her head was resting on my chest. My arm surrounded her and she was playing with my fingers, with her own floating above her head.

"Not long," I was saddened to say so, but unfortunately we could not stay. We would eventually either starve or suffer from hypothermia. Upon my reply, Bella stopped playing with my hand and intertwined her fingers in mine urgently. I was constantly touching her, silent subtle touches, her hands, her back, her hair but we hadn't held hands like this before.

She sat up and turned to me, I had to follow. My arm was wrapped around her because she was still holding my hand; the motion brought us closer together. Her beautiful lips inches from mine, they were a delectable shade of pink that contrasted with her ghost like skin and her chocolate eyes. When I had drawn my attention away from her lips and back to her eyes, she bit down on her bottom with her pearly teeth and she melted into my eyes. My hand was shaky but I placed it lightly beneath her hair grazing her neck. She shivered underneath my touch. I looked in her deep eyes for a long period of time before she gave me a nod of reassurance. I steadily trailed my hand up her neck to the back of her head. She smiled widely, mimicking my own before our lips made contact. Her lips were so warm, so sweet, so perfect. I held her head lightly but kept the contact. We moved considerately against one another. When we separated, I was saddened but she smiled like a Cheshire cat, she rested her forehead against mine. I smiled back when her eyes met mine again. She leant towards my mouth again and kissed me lightly on the lips. I couldn't help my lips to curl up at the presence of hers as I pressed back onto hers.


	13. Chapter 13 Sunday

**BPOV**

I never wanted to leave. His lips were just as perfect as the rest of him. I was proud of myself that I took the initiative and confident because it felt so right in the moment, in the beautiful meadow. I would never have believed that I could make him as happy as he does me but his smile was shining for the rest of the morning. When we got back to the house it was only half nine, however Alice bounced off of the walls when we entered through the back door to the kitchen.

"EDWARD! I said back by nine!" She screeched, I curled into him; for protection from the noise that came from Alice's mouth. He put a protective arm around me and playfully scowled at Alice. This had an adverse reaction as Alice galloped towards us.

"Oh my God, you didn't did you? You did? Seriously?" Alice rambled quickly; I looked up to see Edward's face just as confused as mine.

"Oh pish posh" she said when she realised that we hadn't understood her to dismiss us and the look on our faces.

"Pish posh?" I mocked cautiously still safely behind the protection of Edward.

"Don't say anything you'll regret later Bella. I assume that Edward has told you of the wonderful day we have planned for you?" She said whilst offering her hand to me.

"I'm sorry Alice" I pleaded taking her hand; Alice was pulling me slowly away from Edward. He pulled me back and quickly kissed me on the forehead and I suddenly felt a stretching sensation as both of them had one of my arms each.

"Edward, hand her over. We are going shopping. End of" Alice dictated sternly while he looked genuinely sad and continued to hold on.

"Edward, don't! I'll get Rose and then you'll lose and have a one armed Bella" Alice warned viciously.

"Ah, guys I don't want one arm!" I said in alarm, trying to be diplomatic.

"Then I'll just have to take the other one" Edward sulked.

"Edward, you promised?" Alice whined with her bottom lip out in full force.

"Fine" Edward yielded. He let go of my arm dramatically and sulked off to go and sit down at the table. As Alice was rushing me out of the room and I mussed Edward's hair, gave him a playful smile wink being dragged from the room. His eyes widened with surprise and he laughed lightly.

Rosalie was set and ready in the car. "Well, nice of you to turn up Bella" she teased.

"Ah, let me stop you there Rose, I never knew that I was going shopping, I am just a toy to you people!" I mocked but Rosalie and Alice suddenly exchanged a mysterious look and smiled wickedly.

"Oh no Bella, that comes later" Rosalie said with a wink to me via the mirror. They both laughed menacingly when I was over whelmed with confusion.

**EPOV**

I estimated that they have been gone for approximately six hours, thirty-eight minutes and forty-six, forty seven seconds. Emmett and Jasper were keeping me preoccupied, but my mind wandered again when I noticed the time._ Six hours!_ Bella wouldn't be able to cope especially because I had woken her up so early.

Eventually Rosalie and Alice came storming through the doors armed with an extortionate amount of bags full of shopping. Bella slowly came in slightly after them, dragging her feet behind her, also swamped with many shopping bags. We all stared in silence as she slowly entered the room and flumped down onto the sofa. Jasper and Emmett - and maybe myself a bit too – started laughing at her. She looked absolutely exhausted. She looked up, begging for some assistance so I hurried over to her, released her hands of the shopping bags and shuffled underneath her so she was resting on my lap.

"So how was your day, girls?" Emmett asked, simultaneously raising his hands to cover his ears. Before the rest of us had a chance they replied enthusiastically.

"Oh my god! It was absolutely brilliant wasn't it Rose?" Alice squealed.

"YES, Bella was hot! It was so much fun!" Rosalie chirped in return, ending in a synchronised screech. I titled Bella's head up with my hand on her chin.

"You had fun today?" I said lightly, looking into her sleepy eyes.

"Yu-huh… Kind of" Bella said so quietly and sweetly everybody released a simultaneous sympathetic "aww" sound at her sleepiness.

We decided to watch a couple of films from our large collection to let the girls recuperate. Bella had fallen asleep on top me, which was surprisingly comfortable because she was so small and if I wasn't so in love with her I wouldn't have been noticed she was there. That thought ran so quickly through my subconscious I barely had time to hold on to it, although time slowed as I tried to process this realisation.

"Dinners ready children!" Esme called from the dining room, she interrupted my internal monologue of panic and for that I was very thankful. Everybody began to get up to leave noisily until I interrupted them as I looked down and saw the peaceful Bella in my arms.

"Hey guys, who is going to wake Bella up?" I asked innocently and they looked at me with confused expressions, ignored my question and bounded off into the other room.

"Hey Bella?" I said delicately and her eyes fluttered open and met my own. "Dinners ready, time to eat" I whispered, she looked around slowly and then down to see that she was still in my lap.

"You should have moved me" she said groggily, rubbing the tiredness from her eyes, stretching a little.

"No, I didn't want to move you" I replied childishly, and Bella smiled widely at me then tried hop off my lap but her legs tangled in mine, resulting in a near crash towards the floor.

"Woah steady on there!" I said once I had safely wrapped my arms tightly around her waist.

"As if I needed another reason to thank you" she said while blushing furiously whilst we regained composure and stood up together.

"Oh dear Bella" I said, stroking the beautiful blush that now covered her skin. I felt her fidget in my grasp; I looked down to see her tiptoeing allowing her to look me straight in the eye.

"Thank you" Bella whispered onto my mouth, I physically shivered that instantly embarrassed me. She giggled like a child and then pressed her lips against mine. Once she pulled back, I sulked. She titled her head to the side, and raised an eyebrow.

"But dinner is ready Edward?" Bella teased playfully.

"I want you for dinner" I teased back, I pressed my lips lightly against the skin along her jaw. She giggled again it was a glorious sound that I could never tire of.

"Dude! Stop eating that lovely girl and come and get some food!" Emmett bellowed from the dining room and Bella face turned instantly red again.

"Come on then" I said lightly to Bella who followed, hiding from my family and I reached down to hold her hand. Esme and Carlisle weren't eating with us claiming that they were much too civilised. Bella threw her hair in front of her face, a lame attempt to cover the blush and embarrassment. Fortunately for Bella, everybody was generous enough not to comment. Emmett would have if Esme hadn't prepared one of his favourites for dinner which kept him very preoccupied.

Once we were finished, Jasper and Alice offered to clean the dishes, no body argued and no body else offered to help except from Bella who tried to but I warned her that she would not like to join them while they were 'cleaning'. It brought back terrible memories of a thanksgiving last year where I had walked in innocently to see my sister on top of the counter whilst Jasper devouring her neck with furious kisses; it is safe to say that I didn't sleep well that night. The rest of our merry band congregated in the living room.

"COD?" Emmett suggested with a big smile distorting his face, he wanted another match on the Xbox to justify his previous win.

"Wanting to beat me again Emmett? Keep dreaming" I said mockingly and he gave me a disturbing wink. Rosalie settled on the sofa and beckoned Bella over. She quickly followed with a smile. They started chatting about something as I quickly got distracted through mine and Emmett's 'epic' battle. Alice and Jasper had returned with big mischievous grins on their faces. Alice had a slight blush on her face to, all factors horrified me as her brother.

Esme strolled into the room about an hour later, said that Jasper and Rosalie had to go home soon because it was school tomorrow. Instead of going into the hallway to say goodbye and having to watch Alice and Emmett say goodbye, Bella and myself decided to say goodbye under the watchful eye of Esme; so no snogging would go underway in the living room.

While Alice and Emmett were gone, Bella and I sat in a very comfortable silence, looking intently at each other. It always felt like she was trying to read my mind, I always catch myself thinking what it would be like to be able to read her mind. I can read people so easily; they are so predictable but Bella is much more difficult to tell because of her history though her emotions were always so evident.

Alice ran straight up the stairs claiming she had lots to do before tomorrow. Bella stared at me with her eyebrows raised, questioning me on my sister's motives. "I have no idea" I replied, she looked so adorable when she was confused and we just laughed it off until Emmett walked in.

"Do you know how unfair it is that Bella is allowed to stay here but every other night Rosalie and Jasper have to leave?" Emmett moaned, turning on his heels at the foot of the stairs to face us.

"Emmett, could we recap as to why I am here in the first place?" Bella replied mockingly, using a lot of hand movements, like a geography teacher.

"Ahh I understand" he said with his head down, shamefully.

"There we go" Bella replied patronisingly jumped up and patted him on the shoulder, having to tiptoe to reach his shoulder, ultimately showing the playful relationship they were developing.

"But still it's no fair that Edward's little love thing gets to be here when mine can't" Emmett continued to whine, surprisingly Bella didn't go red, she looked at me curiously. I jumped up also and pushed Emmett in the chest in a playful manner but accidently had a much greater impact than intended.

"Okay then Emmett! Good night now – Batman needs to get to sleep yeah?" I urged and begged Emmett with my eyes to leave.

"Oh yeah, I knew you would eventually see things my way" Emmett said, chuckling to himself and I nodded to get him to go up stairs.

"But I thought you were Batman?" Bella said to me once Emmett was out of hearing range.

"Ah, but surely to be a good Batman you would let some fool think he was Batman because living with two lives is difficult but if you fused them together I could not deal with the press etc, so I use Emmett" I rattled off my plan as quickly as possible while Bella stood in awe at my rambling.

"Edward or Batman you have thought about this way to much" Bella teased with a wide smile.

"No I haven't, because I spend my time thinking about you" I blurted out before I had time to think. Bella's face flushed furiously. I hit my self on the head with the palm of my hand and held it there with my eyes closed; too ashamed to look at her.

"I think about you too" She whispered, my eyes flew open. Bella's confession had shocked me and filled me with a combination of relief and happiness. She had come _a lot _closer to me. She removed my hand from my head, and guided it to the small of her back. I pulled her closer to me, wrapped my other arm around her abdomen. I picked her up a little so her feet were lifted up off the ground. We stared into each others eyes before I leant in a placed a light kiss on her lips. I could not get over the sensation. I was about to pull away when she tangled a hand into my hair and the other grasped onto my neck. She started to kiss me more heatedly. I pulled away for a second, looked her straight in her eyes, full of desire. I could imagine mine were filled with the same longing. She nodded and continued to kiss me she was smiling against the kiss, I ran my tongue along her bottom lip and she gasped and tightened her grip on my neck, pulling her upwards, allowing me to slip my tongue into her mouth to be met by hers.

We couldn't stay like that for long. We broke our passionate kiss for some air. She bit her lip and I put her down gently but she still stumbled. I laughed lightly, and took her arm in my hand, keeping her steady. "Bed time now?" she mumbled, the very innocent comment sent sparks throughout my body as it sounded so evocative. I nodded in response and followed her up the stairs while I tried to collect my thoughts. I rushed to my room as she parted to get ready for bed. I whipped on an old t-shirt and cotton trackies and went down to her bedroom to say goodnight.

The door was slightly ajar, I didn't want to storm in, in case she was indecent so I sneaked a quick look to check. I only caught her reflection in the glass wall; she was pulling a white vest top over her bare back. I followed her back down to her shorts, down Bella's lovely pale legs. In the moonlight it was a beautiful image to take in. Once she was done I knocked lightly on the door so I could be causal and hide my lurking tendencies.

"It's open" Bella said whilst snuggling into bed.

"You got every thing?" I asked, sitting down on the edge of her bed. She nodded after thinking, with her eyes rolling as she thought, her eyes travelling nearly into her brain.

"You sure?" I persisted and she nodded again, rolling her eyes sarcastically this time. This had become our ritual and I crouched down to look her in her beautiful eyes.

"IPod?" I continued, and Bella waved it at me with a matter of fact smile on her face.

"Milk?" I asked, no words were shared when she impatiently pointed to her bedside table.

"Alright, alright I am just checking" I pointed out while pouting for sympathy and she laughed, I loved being able to make her laugh.

"Actually, one thing I haven't got" Bella said suddenly and she moved to sit up, provoking my curiosity.

"Ah what's that then?" I asked, moving back to sit on the edge of her bed.

"Are you my boyfriend?" Bella asked, with the lack of space between us I noticed just how small her bed was, compared to the extravagance seen throughout the rest of the house.

"If you want me to be" I answered diplomatically, I wanted to be with her but wasn't willing to push Bella too fast. With that she pulled me closer by my neck, and kissed me. I rushed my hands to find her neck, trailing my finger tips up and down her smooth skin. We pulled away when we ran out of breath. She flopped quietly back down on her pillow. I stroke her face and hair gently before crawling off the bed.

"I take that as a yes then?" I whispered into her ear before kissing her lightly on the forehead. She giggled quietly before fiddling with her ancient iPod. I stayed there a little while; to watch her fall asleep gently, before I ran up to my own bedroom to collapse upon my own bed with a small thump before dreaming about my glorious girlfriend.


	14. Chapter 14 Learning

**BPOV**

I slept gloriously, dreaming about Edward. _My _boyfriend. His lips were so perfect, so strong, so soft. I loved the way that they left an icy sensation on my skin wherever they touch. Waking up for school, was another thing entirely. I woke up at the break of dawn, again. I actually don't know why I do it, it just happens. Sun rises, so does Bella. Unless some glorious god happens to wake you up at four thirty so you can watch the sun rise together, which is _totally _acceptable.

I woke up and stayed in bed for a good ten minutes. My iPod playing some Marina and the Diamond, "I'm not a robot". Such a great song. I eventually got up, I kept my duvet on, not wanting to leave the warmth of it. I sat down in front of my bag. Ah, I still had to unpack! I hung up my nice-_er _tops, and all of my jeans. The rest of the tops were piled in a drawer. After that it was only six, and I hadn't decided what I was going to wear. Just as I have this thought Alice burst through my door supplied with many shopping bags.

"No, Alice please no" I begged and cowered deep into my covers.

"Fine, I won't play too much. But still could you please wear something that I brought for you yesterday?"

"You did what yesterday? I thought that everything was for you!"

"Bella, please for me? Just wear what I tell you too – it will be so much less painful for you" I took her seriously and then we both looked through the bags. We, nah I'm not pulling that one, _she _ ended up choosing an oversized navy blue knitted top, but I had my way and still wore some knackered blue skinny jeans. She insisted I put my hair up in a high loose ponytail and I truly had no choice but to abide. She wanted to try with some make-up but I persisted no.

Once we were done it was seven, we headed downstairs to get breakfast… And milk. I like milk. When we arrived in the kitchen I was saw everybody waiting looking at us they were sitting at the table with a mountain of food in the middle. I shuffled over and set next to Edward, he pushed a glass of milk along the table and I smiled widely. I decided, from the wide range of foods available, on a fruit salad, only consisting of strawberries, pineapple and mango. I was not looking forward to school.

We drove in Edward's lovely Volvo, well Edward, Alice, Jasper and I did. Rosalie had picked up Emmett earlier, to do some sport stuff or something. The school was so small, the car park was half the size of the canteen was in Phoenix. Everybody else had small second hand cars, and the Cullen's pull up in a brand new silver shiny Volvo. But we were not the centre of attention at the moment for two cars up from us Rosalie and Emmett had arrived. Subtle? Not quite, a sleek red Porsche was rested underneath them.

The rest of the student population seemed to turn their attention to me. Brilliant. Edward raced around once out at his side to open the door for me. I took his hand by my side and intertwined my fingers into his, he looked down questionally at me and I looked back up with a 'don't let me go in front of these hawks, I'll end up armless, do not leave me alone…please' look on my face. Talk about the looks on their faces! They were staring, jaws dropped; mouth's wide open; real attractive. It's called manners people? I had manners enough to hide behind the side of my lovely boyfriend. He looked down at me again when he felt me grip tighter on his hand. Before we were about to walk in a small building he pulled me round to face him, wrapped his over arm over my shoulders.

"You okay?" he said while boring into my mind.

"Yeah, but why do they have to stare like that?" I said whilst pointing lightly. His magnificent eyes followed my finger and off into the direction of our audience. He chuckled! This is not a chuckling situation; I wish I could just slink of into the shadows.

"Why wouldn't they stare at such a beautiful creature like yourself?" He said smoothly, turning back to me with true eyes.

"Oh shh" I said turning my face away (still in his iron hold), hiding the blush that was not subtle, good one blush no ninja certificate for you.

"Bella, you are magnificent" he cooed gently into my ear. I shivered; he laughed and pulled me in tighter to the hug. We headed into the building, it was hideous, covered in potted plants. There was an equally hideous woman sitting at a small desk. Edward ushered me towards her but waited against the far wall, watching me.

"Hey I'm"

"Isabella Swan, lovely to meet you!" she cut me off, she was _very _excited.

"Nice to meet you too" I looked back over to Edward whilst she was fiddling and searching for something. He was holding his nose to stop the laughter from spilling out. I gave him a quick 'V' before turning back to the _lovely _woman. I smiled widely and politely as she handed me some papers and explained what I was to do. Go to all my classes, get the teacher to sign the slip, hand it back to her at the end of the day oh and I was meant to enjoy myself too! Whoopee!

Edward checked out my timetable while walking me to my first class.

"Hmmm" he speculated

"What? What is it?" I questioned

"Nothing, we just don't have many lessons together" he pouted adorably, I pulled him closer to me by yanking on his hand, which was still attached to mine. He stumbled against the force and flopped into me, it made me laugh so much! The panic and shock on his face was hilarious. He pouted some more, but then quickly joined in. He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist and smiled brightly at me.

"Then, we shall just to make up for it wont we?" I teased. Instantly he crushed, well when I say crushed like it hurt, it didn't it was B.E.. Okay lost track, he crushed my lips under his, taking my breath away. I was about to tangle my hands in his glorious hair when he shook his head.

"What? What have I done?"

"No nothing, its just. We have to get to class"

"Oh. Well I guess I'll no better to kiss you back next time then" I said dropping his hand and wriggling from his grip. I started walking away when he twisted me at the waist.

"Not like that Bella honestly, you think I would prefer class to you?"

"Well Edward I just don't know anymore" I said playfully, his hands grabbed at my waist and pulled me closer. He lightly pressed his lips against mine, every time he did so I became jelly in his hands. He broke away and let out a big smile.

"You have English now Bella, with Alice" he said with a wink and a slight push into the classroom. Alice enthusiastically waved, it was school? How could anybody be _that _energetic. She was sitting at the back of the classroom with a desk and a seat next to her which she had placed her bag on, how did she know I had English first? Oh well, I dismissed the thought as I shuffled into the seat.

"Hey Bella, why aren't you looking fine? Where did you get your top from?"

"Very clever Alice" she humphed and pouted like a child. "What have I done now?"

"You didn't play along" she turned away from me.

"You're serious?"

"She is always serious" Jasper said, making me jump… And squeal a little… Alice didn't turn to look at him as he moved around her to sit on her other side.

"Oh, my top? It's brilliant isn't it. Um actually my really brilliant friend gave it to me, she is really brilliant, I would have thought you would know her? She is really cool and lovely and _really _fashionable, just like you" She turned back to look at me radiantly, she smiled and gave me a big hug just before the teacher walked in.

"Romeo and Juliet" the teacher said slamming the book onto the table to gain our attention. Crap, I was meant to give him that slip thing. I stuck my hand up like a little girl.

"Um sir?" he nodded

"I'm Bella, I'm new. I forgot to give you this" I shook it in my hand.

"Well come on then, give it to me" Finally somebody that was in the _right _mood for school. But he was a bit nasty. I shuffled out of my seat again, gave him the stupid slip, he signed it, gave it back and waved me back to my seat.

"So, anything else so _very _critical to interrupt me with before I begin _again?" _Everybody started laughing and I merely rolled my eyes heading back to my seat. Romeo and Juliet was easy, I have been homeless but it wasn't due to my own stupidity. I was clever, I'm going to bother being modest because it is boring to listen to over and over. I have brains, I'm not like a full on genius but much to that hideous teachers' disgust I knew Romeo and Juliee just like the back of my hand. _Hey, that's new_ – Robots, great film (for children)! I just wished that the rest of the day wouldn't be as horrible.

**Sorry for misleading anybody, I am not finishing the story – it is still going. Hope you still like it xxx **


	15. Chapter 15 Visuals

**BPOV**

No such luck. Not for me anyway. It was the lesson before lunch and what terrible lessons they had been! I mean Edward had came to the end of every class to take me to my next; keeping the hawks at bay, holding my hand and generally being brilliant. But once I was in my lesson I was all alone again, I would be drowned in eyes all over my body it made me squirm. They would all whisper about me, and I'm not being big-headed or anything I know it was about me because they were dumb enough to point! Come on people!

The rest of the teachers were nice enough, none of them made me stand and introduce myself. I got my slips signed and was sent to sit mostly on my own. In my current lesson I had to sit next to this bizarre girl – no not Alice. She talked _at _me. Like all lesson. Jessica? Possibly, I can't remember. Worse than Alice, least Alice talked a bit of sense? Whatever she was saying it was pure drivel. I smiled politely and nodded and 'umm'-ed and 'ahh'-ed. As for the work we were doing, I knew the stuff already; I had only been become homeless at the last week of school, I tried to go but I was much to straggly; teachers would have noticed, would have called Phil, would have had me sent back to him. No deal.

The bell rang and I let out a large audible sigh. Jessica quickly turned to me whilst shoving her stuff into her bag, which was pink by the way. A nice pink bag, it might as well of had glitter and sparkles on it, or she could have worn a feather boa? Anyway she turned to me;

"Hey Bella, I know you were hanging around with the Cullens and stuff but they think that they are so you know popular and I was wandering if you would like to hang around with me and my friends; we don't think that you are that strange but the Cullens I can tell they think you are weird. So yeah you can come with me yeah?" What?! What on the glorious Earth was she talking about?

"Um actually, thank you for the _lovely _invitation but I think that I'm good with the Cullens…"

"What?" she genuinely looked astonished.

"I mean seriously thank you, but I'm good" Edward was holding the door open, waiting for me.

"Are you kidding?" Jessica asked me stunned.

"Do you think that he is kidding?" I pointed towards Edward while walking towards him, rolling my eyes. He noticed my irritation and skipped up to me, grabbed my books from my hands, wrapped his free arm tightly around my ribs, bent down and kissed me heavily. When we heard Jessica mimicking hurling, we broke apart, he still had be by the waist and glared at her.

"What's wrong Jessica, catch a glimpse of your own reflection?" Edward said while straightening me and leading me out of the classroom by my hand. As soon as the door closed behind us we heard Jessica squeal, like a combination of "eek" and "ahh" sort of thing.

"Sorry about how rude I was in there. She just _really _bugs me" Edward said to me, why was he apologising?

"Don't be silly Edward it was brilliant. You should have heard what she was saying to be before you came in" he pulled me closer to him, his hand my hip.

"Food? Alice will be mad, we are running late now"

"Late for lunch?"

"Yeah, don't ask…"

"Um Edward I just did"

"Oh pipe down"

"Haha, oh Edward is there milk?"

"Of course"

"Yay" I said enthusiastically, the first thing that had me excited all day. Well apart from the kissing and being with Edward in general, but I could do those things at home. Home. I was calling Edward's house home. Is that a good thing? I think it is. I smiled brightly. Edward looked down at me, confused.

"I just really like milk" I replied to his unvoiced question. I wasn't ready to tell him that yet. It would sound weird, _Hey Edward, your house is now my home. Isn't that great, I've been staying for only two weeks and now I am in love with you _huh?! I'm what? I broke of my preview of what a hideous conversation that would have been. What my subconscious had added in completely threw me. That I definitely could not tell him yet. We had only been together 'officially' for about nine hours.

We had entered the canteen and were lining up by the time I got out of my head. Not like high, I meant just out of the little running conversation I was having. "Why do you like milk so much" he asked as we were nearing my soon to be favourite destination, the milk bit. There were all types of milk, but I only like plain old white milk milk. Proper milk. I picked one, put it on the tray that Edward was holding and smiled again. I kept doing that, smiling; it had started to hurt, but in the good way. Edward merely shook his head. For lunch, there wasn't anything appetising. I settled on a wonderful apple. The colours on it were so beautiful, I know strange thing to think or even say but it was so bright, so red and so shiny. Of course Edward had protested about that I should eat more, but he was paying for it, I wasn't hungry and even if I was the food looked kinda gross.

As soon as we sat down on the table full of our friends, I grabbed my pretty apple, grabbed a random notebook – which I learnt that the lovely Cullen family had provided, paying for me to eat, to clothe, to clean, and now to learn, but on the plus side they had brought me some colours – and my colours and started drawing the apple carefully. The group soon noticed my distraction and fell silent. I looked up to see the whole table staring at the book in confusion.

"Um Bella?"

"Um yes Emmett?"

"What the hell are you doing?"

I shamefully looked down at the fail-y attempt to capture such a glorious range of tones and shape (in the apple) and lifted my head slowly to answer; "It is just an apple" I said whilst shaking the apple at them.

"Bella! Why didn't you tell me you can draw?" Alice chirped

"Well Alice" I began, started talking like geography teacher, "you see, I cannot draw, that is why I haven't told you" Before I could cover it Emmett had grabbed my notebook. I looked to Edward in desperation, but he was leaning forward; eager to see.

"Emmett! Give it back please" I said while clambering around the table, luckily I had closed the notebook when they first asked me about it, he was looking through the pages to find it.

"Emmett! Don't look at it!" he was nearing the page, I had drawn it in the back, sneaky.

"EMMETT NO!" I shouted, really loud. I didn't care who was looking I pounced on Emmett's back and covered his eyes with one hand while the over manically stretched for the book.

"DUDE!" Emmett bellowed. Everybody on our table was laughing hysterically. The rest of the canteen had fallen silent, looking at our display.

"Emmett give it here and I will give it back"

"Give it where?"

"Here! Here, give it here"

"Bella! You are covering my eyes, there fore I cannot see where 'here' is!"

"Edwardd" I moaned. He stood up obidently and walked over to me. "Can you get it for me?" I whined, he merely nodded. He grabbed ME! He grabbed me! And put me over his shoulder.

"No no no no no! Bad Edward!" He was smirking his face off as Emmett had grown silent and sat back down.

"Oh shh you, let us see" Edward said placing me back onto my seat. I released a big childish humph. Edward reached out and rested his hand on my leg and stroked my leg with his thumb. He was actually grazing my skin because of the lack of actual material. "Please don't" I begged on last time. But they were already nose deep in the book, staring at my stupid drawing intently.

"Bella that is positively gorgeous" Rosalie complemented, her face was beaming

"Bella, Bella – draw me!" Emmett chuckled as he passed the book onto Jasper and Alice.

"Damn Bella, that is impressive" Jasper said – true gangster coming through…

"Nice use of 'damn' Jazz" Emmett got there before I did, but to be honest I wouldn't risk it where he could easily rip it out of me right now. Jasper gave a playful 'V' while passing the book fully into Alice's grasp. She was looking at it intently, scrutinising it.

"You've done it Bella. You have finally silence Alice" there was laughter echoing around the table but I stared at Alice's face. She then took her head out of the book and beamed at me.

"Marry me?" she said confidently, Jasper gasped playfully and I smirked. "Seriously Bella, to borrow my Beloved's gangster tone when I say: that is the shit" my face dropped.

"Bella, not like that – I was being gangster, the shit being like the best thing ever!" I smiled brightly but there was still on judge left. Alice passed it to Edward, who took it but was looking ay me.

"I won't look at it if you don't want me to?"

"Well, you might as well, everybody else has" I said glumly. I looked away from him, scared to his judgement.

"Oh would you stop doing that! That drawing was amazing" Rosalie commented, I obliged, smiled and turned to look at Edward. He was smiling brilliantly at the picture in front of him.

"You are truly amazing" he whispered as he pulled my chair closer to his and wrapped one arm around my neck to pull me even closer to kiss my head.

…..

**EPOV**

Today had been amazing, hugging and kissing Bella in public. Every boy in the school was swamped in jealously. She looked so beautiful in blue. Her jeans were so tight and hole ridden, her pale skin shining through. Her picture! That was amazing, she had gotten every single tone and shaded area perfect, the shape of the apple was perfect. Lunch had gone by swimmingly, _nice use of 'swimmingly'. _Why are you so mean to me? _Because you are talking to yourself_… Oh.

We were walking to biology, only Bella didn't yet know that they last two lessons were biology and gym, and I had them too. She gave me a confused look when I reached for the door knob leading to the lab. "Oh Bella, I forgot that I was taking you to your classroom" I joked, she didn't catch on…

"Well, where am I meant to go" I leant down to kiss her fore head and gave her a gentle shove into the room.

"This is a lesson that we share" I whisper to her as I pass to get to my desk. She got her slip signed and waited to be allocated a seat.

"Well Ms Swan. Where would you like to sit?" she looked at me but I shook my head subtly, this was a sneaky trick question. Nearly sir, nearly. But mine was the only desk with a free seat.

"Um, the only free desk is over there" smooth Bella, she played like she didn't know me. He looked over to me, I don't think I covered my smile quick enough.

"Okay Bella, you will sit next to Mike Newton" NO! Not that creep! No way! "Mike show your self" he continued. Bella's face had dropped dramatically. Mike stood up, pushing out his chest. Jessica piped up; "But sir, I am sitting here"

"Well Jessica, nicely observed" I chuckled lightly, needed to give him credit for that one. "Jess, move next to Edward" Jessica looked over to me in horror, I had implanted my face into the desk. This could not be happening. "Now people" he instructed, Bella walked towards Mike, no signs of entertainment, she looked miserable, but she released a small 'stop looking at me in that way before I kick you somewhere you _will _regret' smile to Mike. She was sitting in the seat closet to the row and she turned away from Mike, good. Jessica plumped ungracefully into the seat next to me. Oh please make this be over and done with.

The lesson continued painfully, Bella never turned to Mike. She was daydreaming out the windows. Bella! I whispered with my mind. What? Strange. But the teacher was about to ask her a question. I didn't hear it, but neither did she. "Isabella, concentrate!" he shouted, unnessecary may I add.

"I was concentrating" she retorted.

"Oh really, so what did I ask you?" clearly amused at the thought of winning a fight against a pupil.

"You asked 'why don't plants respire'" she answered. I quickly looked at his face. She was right.

"And the answer is…"

"Well sir, either you are wrong or you set a trick question. Plants do respire" she answered quickly. He was thrown, he had clearly gotten it wrong.

"But why weren't you looking to the front" he was clearly intreguied, as was I, I didn't think that she was listening.

"Because there was only a 2.4 percent chance that you would catch me not paying attention"

"How?" was all he responded with.

"Well there are 32 students in the class and around 10 other objects of interest, you could have been looking at and not at me So add them together that is 42, and then divide the by me, because I have exactly the same chance of being observed as the over objects involved. So you divide one by 42, times by 100 to get a percentage. 2.4 percent chance that you could have been looking at me." Woah.

"I see." He then quickly returned to his desk and told us to copy out something from the textbook, clearly recounting the population of the class and trying to work out the possible ten other objects. That was amazing. I turned my attention to look at Bella, she was sitting away from Mike still.

"Wow, that was really impressive Bella" Mike said creepily. He leant out to touch her shoulder when she didn't turn to reply to him. She snapped back at him, loud enough for the whole class to hear; "Mike, did it ever occur to you that the reason I wasn't looking forward was because I want to get as far from you as possible?" The teacher merely raised his head at the commotion and nodded in agreement.

"Bella, you'll be moved next lesson; don't get to excited"

"Why sir?" Mike chirped up, are you kidding? Bella had just full on beaten him down and he still thinks he has a chance? What a fool.

"Well, to put it nicely Mike; Bella is more intelligent than you could ever dream of being, she would perform much better over by Mr. Cullen. Oh and it seems that she has an uncanny dislike for you" With that brilliant statement from the teacher, Bella beamed and the bell went. I packed my stuff up quickly and zoomed over to meet her. She smiled widely at me.

"Have I ever mentioned how amazing you are?" I said sweetly as we were heading out of the door.

"Um, I don't remember anything being said?" she said coyly.

"Haha, well you are" I beamed at her, grabbing her small soft hands, intertwining my fingers in hers. Making our way to gym. Her eyes widened with freight as we were getting closer, she recognised the sport equipment outside.

"Oh god, not gym" she descried when we reached the doors to the changing rooms.

"Come on Bella, it wont be that bad." I muttered into her hair whilst pulling her in for a comforting hug.

"But it will, you've seen what I'm like. I can't keep up straight"

"Please Bella, try to enjoy yourself for me"

"You're in this class too!"

"Actually Bella, all of us are" Rosalie chirped dragging Bella away from me into the girls changing room. I laughed and made my way to the boys.

Bella got off lucky, she didn't have to participate due to a lack of kit. She was sitting on the benches to the side of the room with a smug smile on her face. When I had wandered out of the changing rooms, in my shorts and a tight vest I could see Bella's mouth drop from the opposite side of the gym. The rest of the hour was spent playing basketball, complete doss. Emmett, Jasper and I were a little bit unstoppable. It was over quickly, I rushed to get changed and meet my Bella.

She was leaning on the wall outside the changing rooms. "So I see that you got yourself out of that one nicely?" I cooed to her, surprising her and slipping my arm around her waist, putting my other hand against the wall, without sounding sadistic, she was trapped.

"Oh very nicely"


	16. Chapter 16 Play

**BPOV**

Okay, so maybe school wasn't as hideous as I thought it was going to be. Edward was so lovely, so what if they found out that I could draw? Is it a bad thing anyway? Well after gym we all clambered into the Volvo and headed home. There it is again! Home. Anyway we were heading there when Alice had an out burst;

"Bella!"

"Jeez Alice, a little warning don't you think? I am driving here" Edward said from the front, Jasper nodded furiously next to him.

"Anyway, Bella"

"Yes Alice"

"Can you paint?" crap, maybe them finding out that I can draw could lead to _very _bad things.

"Ummmm"

"Answer or I will take it as a yes anyway?" her voice rose in octaves as she spoke.

"Um. Fine yes I _can _paint. But I've never done anything big I can't afford it"

"EDWARD!"

"Alice! Stop with the shouting, we are in the same car!!"

"To the shops!" she said with an arm in the air, pointing in some random direction. SAT NAV no, why we have ALICE NAV? Bravo brain, bravo.

"No, no, no, no" I chanted, I am not having her buy me anything else for…ever. I might not be able to get away with that but a long, long time would do.

"Alice, no." Edward said sternly.

"We have already passed the shops; we only have five minutes to get home" Jasper said diplomatically.

"But I wanna" she protested.

"Not now" Edward replied. Soon enough we were back. Edward raced around the car to open my door.

"You don't always have to do that you know"

"Do what?" he chirped innocently. He grabbed my hand and wrapped my arm over me so his hand rested on my shoulder but my arm was across my chest.

"The whole gentlemen thing. Its very nice and very much appreciated but you don't need too"

"I like to do it though"

"Why?"

"Because I don't know, well I guess Esme has always taught me to I guess" Edward replied as we walked through the door.

"I have done what darling?" Esme chanted from the living room. Edward looked at me with his mouth wide open like 'how did she hear that' face.

"I have no idea" We wandered into the living room to meet a smiling Esme sitting in front of the TV watching some sort of cooking programme.

"Mum, Bella was saying about how much of a gentle man I am", releasing me and walking towards her and giving her a polite kiss on the cheek. She beamed at me

"Well isn't that lovely, I'm glad you appreciate the hard effort I put in to make you a nice man" she chuckled at herself.

"I'm sorry, I am occupying the living room this afternoon. You wander off somewhere else now" she said shoeing us away.

"Later Mum"

"Shoo, shoo" she actually shushed us. We crept up the stairs silently. We dropped my things in my room, briefly entering.

"You unpacked" he said enthusiastically. I beamed at him and nodded.

"This morning" I said slipping my arms over his shoulders and draped them over his neck.

"Ah very impressive" He whispered back to me, forwarding a beautiful attack on my lips, and mouth, and oh hello neck.

"Oh Edward" I gasped as he reached my collar bone. He immediately broke contact, a panic-y look draped over his face.

"What? Did I do something wrong?" I chuckled lightly and pulled him back to my lips.

"Oh I wanted to show your something" he said once we stopped for air. He still had me gripped tightly against him. He carefully dropped me from his hold, grabbed my hand in his and pulled me out of the room, up the set of stairs and into his room.

"Um Edward, I have already seen your room" he looked back over to me, small smirk on his face, from where he had be rummaging through a drawer.

"Don't be silly. I know that" he said walking towards me again, hiding a hand behind his back.

"Edward" I warned, he smiled widely. Once he reached me I was careful to finish my sentence before he got hold of me; he can truly dazzle me. "Edward, you didn't get me anything did you? I have warned you how badly I take presents" He laughed playfully at me, wrapped his free arm through my arm, which I had put out on my hip, and continued to rest his hand on my hip.

"Sir no sir! No presents sir!" he nodded his head sharply. I giggled at his mocking. I've been doing that a lot too. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips before dragging me down two flights of stairs. He continued into a room that I hadn't been in. We had passed Esme, Edward quickly winked at her and she nodded quickly in response, trying to catch me out. Not likely. But I was still confused. The room we had walked into was a massive space, cream walls, and dark wooden floors. It had large windows scattered all over the western wall, light filtering in wonderfully. There was a large black piano in the corner, we were walking towards it. I looked up to him hopefully and he smiled down brightly at me.

As we came closer; he released me and walked over to the seat. I stood and watched him get comfortable, he lifted the lid and his eyes were wide in excitement. I smiled at him, he looked so happy, so at home. He then suddenly looked up to me, panic and confusion ridden on his face. I stared back, eyebrows furrowed together – I do that to much, I'm going to get really bad wrinkles, sucks – and titled my head. He patted the bench, which he was sitting on. I obliged quickly, eager to hear him play.

"Okay, I um wrote this piece I guess"

"You guess? Meaning you are not sure or not whether you wrote your own song?"

"Well fine, I did. But please don't judge it too harshly, I've only been working on it for about three weeks" He chuckled lightly as he saw the understanding flood my eyes. He had written it for/about me. I sat there in silence as he got himself ready, music paper teeming with notes dotted everywhere. He started playing softly. He was the definition of a god. I kid you not, it was amazing. The sounds filled the big room and everything seemed to slow down. I stared at his fingers swiftly stroke the keys. He wasn't even looking at the music sheet, his eyes were closed as he whole body moved with the music, his broad shoulders rocked forward as he stretched down the piano, his arms jolted lightly when the song picked up pace. His face bobbed up and down as his arms did. His big smile never leaving his beautiful lips.

He played the last keys so softly, my eyes had welled up. It was so beautiful, he was so talented. He turned to look at me, his hands flying softly of the keys to my hands.

"Say something Bella?" he whispered

"That was so, so beautiful Edward" I said wiping a stray tear away.

"I'm really glad you liked it" he said while pulling me into his side.

**EPOV**

She loved my music, and I loved my music so much it meant so much to me that she liked it. Jasper and Rosalie were spending the night here, we had some family time, had dinner then went our separate ways a little after dinner. Bella was now up in my room, inspecting my music collection. We had been discussing music for a while now, there were things that we liked and disliked, we didn't agree all of the time. We had on some Snow Patrol in the background coming out of my large sophisticated stero. She had gasped at how 'techno' and "star-wars-y" it was. She actually said that. How could somebody so clever, as she had already proved that she was, use a word like "star-wars-y"? I do not know. But she was brilliant. I was lounging out on my small black couch, watching her flick through the CDs.

"Oh dear"

"What??" I questioned

"Britney Spears…." She said while waving the CD at me. Crap I had forgotten that one.

"Uh, oh well, uh it isn't _actually _mine" I said innocently, it wasn't!

"Oh _I _bet" she quipped, "Is she your secret passion?"

"Hahaha, unlikely! No look believe me, it _was _Alice's. She claimed that she ran out of room in her room but still wanted to keep it, I just haven't got round to getting rid of it. I don't normally go in that category anymore"

"Ahh," she nodded.

"Oh, but her down and come over here"

"Sorry are you talking to me or Britney?" she cackled to herself, I nodded until she ran out of steam. She wandered over to me, and sat down and threw her legs over mine. She yawned like a cat, weird comparison but she did the hands balling thing and like twitched her head to the side, not like a twitch, twitch. It was still cute.

"Is somebody tired?" I said lightly, stroking her legs and massaging slightly. She merely nodded and we started our new routine for night-time, which I had a strong passion for by the way; as I did Bella.

……

School for the next two weeks had been good. We were secluded in our own little world. It seemed so much better than in the real one. Bella had been happy but for the last week she seemed like something was bothering her. When I had consolidated Alice she told me to wait until Bella was ready to tell me. As I got ready for school, I whipped on some jeans and a white t-shirt and green cardigan, not a girls cardigan, a MANLY cardigan. _There isn't much manly about a cardigan__. _Had a point, but Bella liked it. Yes that is all I care about, yes I sound creepy and weird but I have learnt to accept that I am in love with her. Had not told her yet, she didn't seem ready, I doubt I was.

I walked downstairs to grab some toast before school, Emmett was already down wolfing down a large bowl of sugar covered cereal while Esme and Carlisle looked on with horrified expressions. I joined them in the same expression as I sat down opposite him. He plunked down the bowl on the table and let out a satisfied "ahh"

"Emmett, that was hideous"

"N'aww thanks little bro" he said with a wink.

"Now boys, you behave" Esme chanted softly, grabbing some fruit from the fridge.

"But Edward did have a point" Carlisle joined in.

"Dad!"

"Emmett, I'm sorry but you eat like a bit of a pig. But you already have Rosalie so it's fine"

"I've always eaten like that!"

"Then you are luckier than you know, Rosalie is a saint" Carlisle joked while giving Mum a small kiss on the cheek, heading out the door. Alice gave Carlisle a quick hug before skipping into the kitchen, Bella following her. She always looked so gorgeous. She had on a dark blue top with laced arms, I loved the way that whatever Alice got her to wear that there would still be some Bella in there; she had on her blue skinny jeans, the same she wore on the first day of school – they were her favourite, mine too. I gazed at her as she skipped to the fridge to get some milk. Once she had gotten her milk she came to sit next to me, a smile plastered across her face as I passed her the piece of toast that I had made for her in preparation.

Alice had pestered and pestered Bella to start painting. She hadn't given in just yet but I could tell that it wouldn't be long. Bella had been made to draw something every week. This week it was her task to draw an ivy leave; the only condition she had to hold against this whole 'we are forcing you to draw so we can look at these beautiful pictures' was that we were not allowed to see it until she had finished. This had all started with Alice and Rosalie, Bella had bargained them with drawing, slightly foolish, but it worked, for now. Last week she had me made to draw a small flower, she chose a daisy. It was beautiful as aspected and Alice bugsy-ed it as hers.

I looked at her cautiously, I had been sick with worry; her looking so distracted like that.

"Edward, whats wrong?" she questioned

"Um I think I should be asking you that"

"Huh?"

"You have clearly been thinking about something for at least a week, I've been worried about you" the rest of the family weren't listening, arguing about something petty I believe.

"Oh Edward, do I have to?"

"No of course you don't. But I would like to know, especially if it was bugging you" I said that innocently but I pulled a little subtle puppy-dog face. I had reached my hand over and was tracing circles on her leg.

"Its my hmurghhmerday tomorrow" she mumbled, I barely heard her

"Sorry it is your what?"

"It may or not be my birthday tomorrow"


	17. Chapter 17 Preparation

**BPOV**

"It may or may not be my birthday tomorrow" I said. I had been thinking about telling them for a whole week. I could have gone un-noticed and they wouldn't have thought twice, but for some reason this just ate away at me. But I don't want a fuss, I knew that they would. I haven't had a fuss for my birthday since well, I haven't ever made a fuss over my birthday I mean, yay I'm getting older.

"Your birthday?" Edward spluttered, his face was distorted with, I don't know what you would call it, shock, confusion, panic – all of them wrapped up into one strangely beautiful package.

"You what!" Alice squealed across the table.

"It's her birthday, tomorrow!" Edward said, calmly? Nahh.

"Oh my god! Why didn't you tell us Bella?" Alice squealed, again.

"Yeah Bella, why didn't you tell us?" Edward said to me, I felt like I was being interrogated.

"I just don't want a fuss that's all" I said truthfully

"You should have told me" Edward said, he had calmed down now. He was pleading.

"BELLA! This is not acceptable, Edward don't you dare back down. She is not getting out of this one! First you don't tell us you can draw, now your birthday Bella. Do you think we would have gone a year with you here and not noticing that you never celebrated your birth on um what's it called…? A BIRTHDAY!" That was a hyper jumble of noise and sense that came from Alice, but to be honest I wasn't thinking that far ahead.

"I'm with Alice on this one guys" Emmett said, "I like birthdays" he said with little glum face on.

"Guys I'm sorry…"

"Yeah you should be" Alice sulked

"Alice, don't be like that. I've almost done my picture?"

"No Bella, you've been bad" she sulked of out of the room. I turned to Edward who was still a little shaken up.

"Edward?"

"I wish you'd told me, I'm not going to have any time to get you anything good enough for you"

"Bella, you're a big meany."

"Emmett! Don't you get mad at me too"

"I'm only joking Bella, but you have some serious grovelling to do, Alice wise" he said with a big grin but then a sympathetic smile. After he left I turned to Edward again.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know that it would mean that much"

"You didn't think that your birthday wouldn't mean that much to us?" Edward said confused.

"Well, I guess but it just not a big thing for me" I said glumly, I didn't mean to upset him or Alice.

"Least you know now" He said coming swiftly towards me, placing a careful hand on my cheek. I nodded, I felt bad for making them panic, but was slightly glad that due to time they wouldn't be able to do anything snazzy. He kissed me gently, I let my hand loosen from the glass of milk and raced to find his hair before he could um, escape. I deepened the kiss, I sound like some sort of sexual predator but he tasted so, so yummy.

"Bella! Stop eating face, Edward needs to take us to school" I pulled my attention to her immediately, I'm glad that she wasn't ignoring me, but interrupting me! But of course, I blushed. Edward smiled, always amused at my blush. It's a serious condition! Kind of…

…..

When she said that Edward needs to take _us _to school. She really meant that she is going to drop me and school, wait for Rosalie, then run of with Edward and leave me alone with Emmett and Jasper, both of which I only have gym with. So the day before my birthday I am on my own. Brilliant. Most of the day I went un-noticed and un-bugged by people. At lunch I stormed to the canteen to find Emmett and Jasper. And find them I did. They practically jumped on me and dragged me off to the table.

"Bella," they said in unison

"Why hello to you to. Why did you pounce on me like that? I didn't get any milk"

"What is it with you and milk?" Jasper questioned

"Dude, stay on topic. We have orders"

"Oh no, not you two!"

"What is your favourite colour Bella?"

"No, no. This is stupid"

"Bella, do it. It will be so much less painful this way" Emmett warned, playfully checking out his knuckles.

"Fine…"

"So what is your favourite colour?" Jasper continued

"Green, is this going to be like a twenty questions thing?"

"Um or you could call it interrogation" Emmett chanted

"Favourite smell?"

"Favourite smell?"

"Behave Bella"

"It's a weird question but I guess… like a flower-y, strawberry, sweet sort of smell"

"Emmett, were we meant to be writing this down" Jasper 'whispered'.

"Dude, that would have been a good idea…" Emmett 'whispered' back, I chucked them a pen and paper from my bag; and soon continued the assault on my personal information.

"Favourite food?"

"Oh and milk doesn't count" Emmett said

"I gathered that… Um I would have to go for like some fruit or something"

"You are _so _strange."

"You don't need to tell me" We laughed and they didn't stop with the petty questions until the end of lunch. The end of the day was over quickly, Jasper and Emmett had met me outside the girls changing rooms.

"Guys I have just thought, how are we getting home?"

"Ah foolish Bella"

"Silly, silly Bella" they mocked, they shook their heads: 'ashamed' of me. Emmett ran off ahead to the car park and pointed like a child to a big jeep.

"They dropped it off this morning, I cant believe you didn't think that they wouldn't think of _everything_" Jasper chanted. He had a point, of course the Cullens would think of everything. When we arrived home the house was empty. There was a note on the fridge; the place most likely we were going to see it, Esme had said that she had gone out with Rosalie, Edward and Alice, Carlisle would be home soon. It was getting late and I decided to make some dinner with the aid of Emmett and Jasper of course.

We had finished dinner, stayed downstairs for about two hours – watching TV and they challenged me to some Call of Duty. I failed, big time; they laughed _big_ time. I had 'stormed' off and declared it 'such a silly game, and that I wouldn't want to make them feel bad by showing them how truly great I was. Carlisle had come home while we were preparing dinner, had told me off about not telling any one about my birthday, had dinner and then wandered off into his study to let us play.

I was just getting in my nice warm bath when they came home. I heard big gasps from Emmett and Jasper and prayed that Alice, Edward, Rosalie and Esme had actually brought something like a bouncy castle for Emmett and Jasper. But I had an underlying feeling that that wasn't the case. I was listening carefully, many feet came clambering up the stairs and scampered of in the other direction but some feet came closer to me.

"Bella?" Edward knocked on the door.

"Oh sorry? Who are you? I don't recognise your voice?" I mocked, okay so I was pissed that I missed out on a whole day with him.

"Bella, don't be like that" He said as he slumped against the door.

"Fine I'm sorry. I just missed you" I whimpered

"Bella, don't you think that I didn't miss you?"

"Well, you were busy I guess"

"For somebody so clever you are foolish, I never stop thinking about you Bella"

…..

**EPOV**

I was telling the truth, Bella always kept my mind hostage. I loved it. I wasn't angry that she hadn't told me that it was her birthday TOMORROW. I was just upset, at least it was going to be a Saturday so we wouldn't have to bother with school. Today had been hectic; Alice was rushing around for decorations, cake, presents, clothes. I was excited for Bella, but knew that she didn't take presents well. I warned my family of this and they 'understood'. Our family have always been terribly extravagant. I rushed to get changed into my p-js while Bella was finishing in the bath, I was done and back at the bathroom door but it opened.

Bella was standing there, towel tided underneath her armpits; the cream colour towels melting into her own pale tone. Her hair was still wet, smoothed out of her beautiful face. This way you could see very single angle and tints of shadow, the highlighted areas of her face; her brown eyes looked positively wonderful, the tones of dark brown, mahogany, slightly hazel tones bounced off in every direction: forming together one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I processed all of these things very quickly and gasped in awe. She stared up at me underneath her long, long eyelashes. She blushed slightly, bit down gently on her bottom lip before grazing past me, where she had touched me shoulder it left tingles underneath my skin.

I wandered slowly to her room, not wanting to spy on her again. Well you know? Not like I wouldn't want to see again, but not like that. She had left the door open, not wide open, but welcomingly open. I slowly edged passed the door; she twisted her neck to look at me. She had been standing facing her bed, pulling her shorts up. She had little grey shorts on; she must have had them since she was at least 5, they were knackered. She was still topless had I mentioned? She was careful not to turn to me, I only saw her glorious back, the moonlight was shining in, hitting her side, her body refracting the light beautifully. I studied her body as she still stood facing away from me. Her little shoulders leading to a skinny back, by her ribs and waist she went in and gracefully came out a little by her waist again. She looked like some sort of Greek godess; if Greek gods came in such a wonderful skin tone. She slipped on a white vest top, and turned to look at me expressively; she glided into bed and waited for me for me to come over to her.

"Hey" she whispered as I was crouching down to eye level

"Hey" I whisper lightly back, reaching for her hand.

"I'm sorry about not telling you it was my birthday tomorrow"

"It's okay, I understand, I just think that celebrating the day that you were brought into this world should be celebrated"

"Why?" she said curiously

"Because, if you were never born 18 years ago, then I would of never gotten the chance to meet you" She smiled brightly, and pulled on my hand to get me to lean over and give her a quick peck on the lips. I stroked her hair from her face and got up to leave.

"Edward" she said as I was about to close the door behind me,

"Yeah?" I answered stepping back in slightly.

"Do you have to leave?" she said. No I didn't, I really didn't. Well I kind of did, but I wasn't going to tell her that. She outstretched her hand and beckoned me over.

"Stay with me" she whispered as I sat on the edge of her bed. I nodded lightly; I stayed perched on the side of her bed. She gave me a wonderful 'have you not got any brains boy?" look. She patted the bed space behind her, it was impressive how small she was, the bed was tiny yet there was so much space next to her. I jumped over her and she opened the covers so I could get underneath them. I wrapped my arms around her waist. Her back hugged tightly to my chest. She leant her head back; "thank you" she whispered against my neck.

"Anytime"

**Like it? xxx**


	18. Chapter 18 Birthday

**BPOV**

I had woken up at the break of dawn, as usual but was so comfortable I didn't move an inch. In the night Edward had moved and now one arm was tucked under my head the other outstretched across the bed. When I say I didn't move an inch, I meant I didn't move an inch away from him. I did however snuggle into him, rest my head on his chest, pulling his arm with me so it was resting on my shoulder, I outstretched an arm over him. He only stirred a little but smiled in his sleep as I drew little pictures onto his chest, not with pen or anything, with my fingers. _Hey I couldn't find any paper so I just drew on you, I didn't think you would mind. _

"Morning birthday girl" he said groggily, shocking me. I jumped a little in his arms and he laughed, tightened his grip on me. I had almost forgotten it was my birthday but I wouldn't mind if we could stay like this.

"How do you wake up so early?" he questioned, resting up on one elbow, putting me at a funny angle I gave up and rolled over on my stomach, resting on my elbows to look at him.

"I don't know, I just always have" He nodded slowly, understanding. I have a smile like always on my face now. It is impossible to get rid of it when he is around.

"We better get ready" he said, getting ready to leave

"No! Please stay, I don't want to" I murmured the last bit because I had wrapped my arms tightly around his chest and shoved my face into the cave of his neck. He chuckled but obligied, he lay back down and shuffled me around so I was back to where I had been, but my upper body mostly over his chest; my head was resting near his neck. He started soothingly stroking my back.

"You know birthday Bella, we will have to get up today" he chirped

"Oh do you have to call me that?"

"Well it is your birthday…Bella"

"You are hilarious!" I said sarcastically, he laughed, I started shaking as his chest rumbled. I leant up on his chest to look at his face.

"And you my Bella are beautiful" he said stroking a stray bit of hair behind my ear and leaving his hand on my cheek. I leaned forward slowly, aiming for his leaps. He beat me to it and kissed me heavily. It was absolute bliss. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me upwards. He nibbled lightly on my bottom lip and I struggled for breath. I let his tongue slip into my mouth, I met his with mine and they started to dance. I tangled my hands in his glorious hair and around his neck. His hands were undecided on where to go. I directed him to the small of my back. He raced his fingertips up and down my back. We broke off for air, both short of it. I only noticed that I had straddled him slightly. I couldn't care less, by the look of it, neither could he. I rested my heavy head on his forehead and smiled widely, he mirrored mine. How could anything be so perfect?

"Shit" he whispered as he glanced at the bed side clock, I hadn't for a while.

"What? What is it?" I straightened, suddenly really aware of what it would have looked like if somebody had walked in… If you get what I mean. I rolled of off him, embarrassed of where I was. Sitting on his chest… Esme and Carlisle would love that, _Happy Birthday you random homeless girl! Oh hey, you're on top of my angelic son, that's fine, totally, totally fine. _I crawled under his arm and just rested my head on his chest instead of all of me.

"Alice wanted me downstairs at 8"

"Seriously?"

"Well she didn't know that I was going to spend the night here did she?"

"I don't know, she does know some things some times."

"Ah, good point, she does, that's weird isn't it?"

"Yeah, so what is the time then?"

"Bella the clock is right there" pointing to the clock, but I wasn't facing that way.

"I know, but I want you to tell me"

"Its two past eight"

"Edward, we have been talking about the time for a minute, meaning that you uttered 'shit' at like one past eight"

"Yeah"

"You are crazy! The lot of you"

"Fine I'll just leave then?" he said flipping off the covers, sitting up in bed.

"Noo, not like that"

"Well I do have to get up Bella" he said continuing to struggle around me, I wasn't going to make this any easier for him to _leave_.

"I thought that it was _my _birthday"

"Oh darling, please catch up" he said now sitting on the edge of the bed, I just ignored his sarcastic comment and continued. Rude boy.

"Surely I should be able to get _anything_ that I want"

"You have to get up Bella…Well not yet, we are going downstairs and you are going to have a lovely long bath"

"But I had one yesterday"

"Well just stay up here until we call you"

"I'm not a fan of this scheming Edward" I said folding my arms dramatically and childishly across my chest.

"N'aww Bella come here" he grabbed my hand and pulled me up. He swept his big arm around my neck and pulled me in close to him.

"Just have fun for me?" he continued, looking me dead in the eye with puppy-dog eyes. Like his eyes weren't irresistible enough, just stick a puppy-dog in there.

"Fine" I mumbled, wiggling out of bed and standing in front of my new wardrobe – it wasn't new, well it was to me, it was just I hadn't had one for years – pondering what to wear. I couldn't decide, so I flew my arms up in the air and threw them across my chest.

"Stop being so grumpy, it is your birthday" he swarmed his arms around my waist from behind. I was persistent, kept my arms crossed.

"Come on Bella" He whispered into my neck, making me shiver.

"But I don't wanna" I whined

"Shh," he echoed as he kissed my neck

"Hmm" I murmured as he placed gentle kisses up and down my neck, along my shoulder and collar bone.

"I thought you were meant to be with Alice" I choked out, his kisses continued.

"True" he dropped his hands from my waist and walked towards the door.

"Edward Cullen!" I shout-'whispered'. I waggled a finger at him, signalling him for him to approach me. He came like a good boy, head down.

"I'm sorry" he said wrapping his arms around my waist again. Nearing in to kiss me;

"No it's not that" I turned away just before our lips touched, his face looked so disheartened, I desperately tried to hold on to my laughter and entertainment.

"What should I wear" I continued, looking confused at my wardrobe. He perked up, what? Boys aren't meant to appreciate the effort and thought process that goes into getting dressed – for other girls anyway, I just chuck on whatever normally.

"I love you in blue" he whispered in my ear before strolling out of my room. So much for pay back; I'm left with shivers and he gets to leave! Not fair, how did he do that? It took me forever to decide, I hated imagining what this would be like everyday, if I cared a lot about what I looked like. I decided on something blue funnily enough. It was a tight high waisted skirt, dark blue; I never owned anything like that before I met Alice, but she had gotten it for me. Underneath I decided to wear my knackered Gun's and Roses tee. It suited me. I think? I thought about wearing tights, but I didn't have any, I let my wild hair down and shoe wise, I put on some off-white plimsolls. The skirt was girly enough! I waited patiently in my room until I was beckoned.

"Bella? Oh Bella?" Alice chirped, skipping up the stairs into my room.

"Woah" she said when I stood up.

"You are good at this" she said eyeing me up and down, instructing me to twirl. I complied

"What dressing myself?"

"Yeah, you look really cool and not to mention really hot. I'm glad that you are wearing the stuff I gave you" she said wandering over to my wardrobe, having a flick through seeing what I had and hadn't hung up.

"Anyway, is it someone's birthday today Bella" she said with a smile then gave me a quick 'play along or die' face.

"Um I'm not sure, who could it be?"

"Well, I think it could be yours?"

"MINE? Are you sure Alice?"

"Um..Yep" she said jumping from where she stood, pouncing on me with a huge hug and then grabbed my arm and led me to the top of the stairs. And you know when I said yesterday that at least seeing as they only had one day left they wouldn't be able to do anything fancy – I was so, so, so wrong.

Alice had decorated the whole room, flowers crawling up the walls, fairy lights ready to turn on when the sunlight was shining; a table made up with presents. Crap, presents. "Fuck me Alice" I whispered to her, pulling her into a hug, "it looks incredible thank you so much"

"Anything for you Bella" she chirped as she quickly headed down the stairs to gather the family's attention. I followed her, not so quickly. Edward was the first to notice me; he stood in awe as I walked towards him. He bent down to kiss me on the forehead. I should be the one in awe, he looked perfect in his dark red blazer, rolled sleeves and a white t-shirt with a long v-neck. He was also sporting some washed out black skinny jeans.

"Ah 1, 2 3" Emmett bellowed from the back of the group

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Bella, happy birthday to you" Everyone chanted, I blushed quickly, all this attention.

"Hey! Guys you didn't do the proper one"

"Emmett that was the proper one" Rosalie said, confusion slapped across her face.

"No the proper one ends; you look like a monkey and you smell like one too"

"Oh god" Jasper said, in shock that he could still be so immature. We all burst out laughing and Carlisle tapped Rosalie on the shoulder sympathetically.

"Okay, okay! Breakfast time!" Alice shouted above the laughter. The rest of the group headed into the kitchen but Edward kept me behind. I looked up at him, he was beaming down at me.

"You look so beautiful Bella"

"Thank you, Alice was proud that I could dress myself" I laughed, he pulled me in for a tight hug.

"You don't look to bad yourself" I said, looking up at him through my eyelashes. He looked down to me hungrily. I couldn't resist and jumped on his lips, with my mouth – that would have been strange. He pulled me closer and lifted me off the ground – why am I so short?! Well not as short as Alice, but still. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck. Why am I cursed with lungs that constantly need to be filled with oxygen!?

We wandered into the kitchen to be greeted with a big flash, crap photos.

"Alice come on! At least give them a chance" Rosalie chirped, I gave her a thankful smile, she winked at me as if to say 'I'm nice now but later I have something possibly dreadful in store'.

"Okay, okay – get together then" we obliged, I hand one hand rested on the muscular arm that was holding my waist and I smiled. I don't mind smiling but preparing for photos – with people on looking, kinda makes me feel a little sick. But I got other it because I looked up at the gorgeous man holding me and the smile just came to me.

"Okay say cheese"

"No!" Emmett shouted before Alice got a chance to press the button.

"What now Emmett?" Esme questioned 'impatiently'. It was like this family never actually had any real negative emotions. All they do is mock eachother and have a bit of general banter it was marvellous, so care free.

"All day, in honour of Bella's birth we should say 'say milk'. Because she is obsessed with the stuff"

"And it is still a dairy product" Jasper added in.

"Sounds good to me" I added also

"Alright! I had a good idea!" Emmett roared with laughter and gave Jasper a booming high-five.

"Can I take the photo now?" Alice questioned. They all hushed down and nodded, staring over at me and Edward waiting for our picture.

"Okay, so say"

"MILK" the whole table shouted. Alice shook her head in astonishment but continued with the photo anyway. I asked and asked but she wouldn't let me see it. Edward didn't seem to bothered – of course he wouldn't he is a god. For breakfast they had prepared a gorgeous fruit salad, courteous of the 'interrogation' that I sat through yesterday, they informed me. It had mangos, pineapple, strawberries, raspberries, apple, orange, melon, grapes and lots and lots of other yummy fruit. Alice was watching me carefully throughout breakfast.

"Presents now!"


	19. Chapter 19 Gifts

**EPOV**

"Presents now!" Alice squealed as soon as Bella had finished. Bella would hate this bit; her face showed it clearly. Her mouth dropped open, she looked up to me eyes wide. I could only shrug. I had no control over this, but I was secretly happy because I get to give pretty nice things to a wonderful women _and _I had an excuse. We all got up and headed back into the living room, alice was giving us directions and ushering us around. I had gotten up and was walking towards the living room before I realised the most important person wasn't with me. I looked back with puppy-dog eyes, hoping they would work. She did look truly beautiful; the dark blue contrasting perfectly with her long, pale legs. Her top was brilliant; it showed that she was still my Bella and not just some Barbie Bella that my sister had created. Her wild hair framed her face, like the very first night I met her. It was gorgeous.

Bella was sulking in her chair. "Oh come on Bella, it wont be _that _bad" I said lightly walking back over to her.

"Yes it will, I don't deserve all this attention and money and presents. I'm only getting older" she sulked. How foolish. She deserved everything and more. I had reached her, I turned her around on her seat, crouched down in between her lovely legs, I stared up into her glorious eyes. I decided to tell her just that.

"Bella, you deserve everything and more, twice over damn it!" she smiled lightly, and my smile grew. I rested my hands on her soft knees. She brought her hands down to clutch mine.

"But I already have everything I could ever wish for Edward. And you and your family have given it to me" she said quietly, I could tell that she was fighting back the tears. I reached one hand up to stroke her cheek and tucked the hair behind her ear.

"Oh Bella" I ushered as a stray tear fell down her beautiful cheek. She threw her head upwards so she was staring at the ceiling. She shook her head, her hair flying around. She came to a sudden halt and looked back down to me bearing a cautious smile. I put a confused look on my face, questioning her actions.

"I was about to get all emotional, I just shook it out" she smiled widely at me, placed a small soft hand on my cheek now. I smiled back at her, lifted myself so I was at eye level with her.

"Bella you can get 'all emotional' you can 'kick off' you can do whatever you like Bella" I said sincerely

"Because it is my birthday?" she questioned, looking innocent and confused.

"No Bella, because I love you" she looked astounded and I traced her face quickly to see a set emotion to see what to do. She wasn't ready for this, she had only been here a month. Come on Edward what the fuck were you thinking, _you clearly weren't thinking. _Don't rub it in! Her eyes suddenly changed, she looked happy so unbelievably happy. Her smile grew on her face and her eyes were shimmering over.

She moved both her hands to delicately hold my head in her hands.

"I love you too" she ushered, pulling me slowly into her and moving herself forward to my lips. I moved my hands quickly to her neck. I touched her lips gently. I could feel a few tears run down her cheeks. But her lips were smiling, she was happy – tear worthy happy!! Her warm tears ran down her cheek and reached mine, that is why I knew what sort of temperature they were; because they touched my cheek too, I don't have some weird tear thermometer power thing – how pointless would that be?! _Hey I can not stop you crying but would you like to know the temperature of your tears? _Nah.

She pulled away slowly, trailing her hands down my neck, resting in the caves of my neck. Her smile was beaming and her happy tears had stopped. I smiled back at her widely, struggling to keep my happy tears in, say what you will but I am happy, unstoppably happy. I loved her so much, and she loved me back. SHE LOVES ME! I pulled her back for another strong kiss to keep the moment here forever. I never wanted to leave this moment. I pulled away again though, I looked her in the eyes. She moved a hand to wipe away the light tear stains – still smiling may I add.

I held her head in my hands lightly, suddenly shock covered her face. She was looking towards the door. No?! Not now, please tell me my family weren't watching. Oh god, I still hadn't turned around but Bella had started to blush profusely. Crap. Not that I minded people knowing but it still, you know what I mean? She looked up to me again, shock, panic and embarrassment covered her face. I slowly turned around and was met with the eyes of my on-viewing family. Esme's hands were clasped together in front of her mouth; Carlisle was smiling brightly with an arm resting on Esme's shoulder. Rosalie and Alice looked positively giddy, Alice was jumping up and down silently while holding tightly onto Rosalie's hand. Emmett was grinning immaturely and Jasper was imitating tears.

"Can we come in?" Rosalie asked politely, Alice clearly too excited to talk… sense. I pulled Bella up and hugged her tightly into my side. I mouthed a 'sorry' to her and she nodded and wriggled her head into my chest. I nodded at my family and they stormed in and surrounded us with a group hug. Bella looked up at me, tightly compacted in the middle of the hug.

"I can't breath" she whispered to me quietly, tiptoeing to reach my ear.

"Breathing space is needed!" I said loudly. They broke their hold around us and stood with stupid grins on their faces. Bella still hiding into my chest.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKK" Alice squealed, I would say loudly but it was so much louder than that. She pounced in between us and started jumping up and down. She grabbed one hand of mine and one of Bella's, still jumping up and down, making our arms flop up and down too. Bella grew a curious look on her beautiful face. I looked to my family for guidance Rose caught my look.

"Alice?" Alice's movement slowed, as she was intrigued by Rosalie.

"Presents?"

"PRESENTS!" she screamed again, she dropped my hand and ran out into the living room, but she had taken Bella with her.

"Um thanks for the help Rosalie" I mocked as she walked past.

"Shut up lover boy, I did what I could" she said shrugging her shoulders. Emmett gave me a 'light' punch of the arm, the same light punch which sent me stumbling backwards into the kitchen counter. I laughed lightly and followed everyone out. Alice had sat Bella down in the middle of the sofa, Alice was standing in between the table stacked with presents and the sofa. Rosalie and Emmett were sitting down in the large chair to the side. Esme and Carlisle shared the other sofa and Jasper was perched on one side of the sofa that Bella was sitting on, clearly leaving space for me to sit beside her.

"Edward" Alice hissed as I was taking my time sitting down. She looked at me sternly and I hurried to Bella's side, intertwining her beautiful fingers with mine.

"Okay Bella, who's do you want first?"

"Umm" she said looking to me for direction, I merely shrugged.

"I really don't mind Alice, who ever doesn't mind I guess" Alice's smiled beamed wider as she rummaged around the table.

"Okay, this is from Jasper and myself" she beamed handing over a small white box.

"Tha" Bella started but was quickly interrupted by Alice

"Nu-uh, no thank yous until you open the presents, or else we will be here forever" Alice commented. She was crazy. As if she heard me she gave me another stern look. Somebody gave her way too much sugar… Another glare, get out of my head!!

……

**BPOV**

This day had been so amazing. Edward told me that he loved me! I was so freaking happy! And the presents, I thought I would get really angry at the amount that they had spent on me, either they were lying but they had promised that these were gifts from the heart and not their wallets. Alice and Jasper had first given me unlimited life tokens for "Barbie Bella Dress Up" and Jasper had given me ones labelled "Get Crazy Alice of off me" tokens. They were greatly appreciated, even though I have not yet found myself as unlucky enough to succumb to this 'Barbie Bella' they were referring to.

Rosalie and Emmett had gotten me a gift certificate for an 'education in modern media production' as Emmett had put it; Rosalie translated it as 'DVDs, at free rent, any time from Emmett's large collection'. These were jokey presents and I was of that. But I was curious what they had been out doing all day yesterday if this was the outcome. Esme had given my some new bed covers and sheets, and another token for 'Esme gets to re-decorate your room'. But Esme claimed that it had to be converted immediately. Carlisle had given me a band aid; then chuckled himself into hyperventilation. Then he gave me a beautiful pair of pearl earrings, he later told me that Alice had chosen them, I laughed at his honesty. Carlisle and Esme had given me a Cannon DSLR, I nearly fainted. I have always wanted one, _always_. They chuckled to themselves and winked at Emmett and Jasper, damn! I'd forgotten at the interrogation I had admitted that I had always wanted to try at photography.

Alice and Rosalie persisted that Edward gave me his present before their final present. I was worried about their present but put it aside for now. I turned to Edward as he stood and went to the table to pick up a small box covered in wrapping paper. He smiled warily as he gave it to me. He passed it to me, un-wrapping it made my stomach curl. I knew that he was bound to have spent a ridiculous amount of money, and by the grin on his face I knew he had.

"Edward! I can't believe you, I have a perfectly fine working iPod" I gasped as I looked at the impressive iPod classic. I only had a little black and white screen iPod, but it still worked. This thing had more gigabytes than I could ever think to imagine.

"No, you have an ancient iPod. It has a black and white screen Bella" he moaned, pleading ridden in his eyes. I looked down at the marvellous machine in my lap. Sighed and smiled brightly.

"Thank you Edward"

"Anytime" he said, wrapping his hand around my waist, shuffling me closer to him on the sofa.

"No not anytime! That goes for all of you! I greatly appreciate everything you have done for me and given me, but I could never excuse this silly waste of money on me" they all gasped in unison.

"Bella, you just shut right up!" Alice said from her now seated position next to Jasper.

"Yeah too right, you will get presents when we give you presents! Or else you just will not cope in this family" Rosalie protested. Alice nodded fully. I sighed, clearly not going to win, severely out numbered. Then Rosalie and Alice grew wicked grins on their faces.

"_Our _present now Bella" Alice chirped, she was pure goodness but in a evil way. She skipped over to the table to pick up a large box. She placed it in between me and Edward on the sofa.

"Go on then" Rose urged. I un-wrapped it cautiously to find a tool box underneath. Alice and Rosalie were struggling to contain their laughter.

"Guys I don't get it?" I questioned, they remained 'silent' other than the giggling, I looked up to Edward who signalled me to open the tool box.

"No, please oh god. What have you done?" I questioned manically as I opened the tool box to see it stuffed to the brim with paints and paintbrushes. I was shocked when they grabbed a hand each and raced me up the stares in a direction I didn't recognise. We raced up a second stair case, the one to get to Edwards room. I didn't realise there were any other rooms up here. But we passed his room. Everybody was quick behind us. We halted suddenly as we reached the end of the hallway. I was turned to face a closed door. The rest of the family had caught up and were shuffling in behind us, in the cramped corridor. I felt Edward slip his hand through the crowd of people behind me and squeezed my hand lightly.

"Okay Bella, close your eyes"

"Guys please, what have you done?"

"Bella" Rosalie hissed. I complied and huffed childishly. I heard the door opening and was lead into the room.

"And taadaa" Alice said dramatically. I slowly peeked open my eyes.

"Oh my God" I said quietly I was welling up again. I wandered around the glorious room. They had created a spare room into an art studio. There were large windows scattered across the long white walls. There was a large easel to the corner of the room, surrounded by a small stool and mountains of paints, and new brushes. It was beautiful, littered with fairy lights. There were several art books scattered on a large desk, pots filled with colour pens and pencils. It was glorious. I turned back to look at the family who had given me so much. They were standing nervously waiting for a response.

That is when I started crying, like full on tears streaming down my face. They all stared on. Edward walked up to me, wrapped his strong arms around my waist and lightly forced my tear stained face up to see his. I was smiling, brightly. So brightly that he began to smile to. He loosened his grip and was now just holding me by my waist. He waved the rest of his adoring family over. They hugged me strongly. I was still crying, but it had slowed. When we parted, we stood around in a circle, I was still admiring the beautiful wonderful space that they had created for me.

"Welcome to the family Bella"


	20. Chapter 20 Beauty

**EPOV**

She loved the studio; I must admit it was kind of my idea too. But I'm not just saying that because it went so well. She clearly loved art, you could tell it in the way she drew. She would never let me see the pictures we made her draw but I couldn't help but see the giant smile on her face as she scattered her hands swiftly across the page, when her eyes flickered up in energy as she got a new idea, how she would scrutinise each picture until it was done.

The rest of her birthday was seamless; Bella and I were uploading my music collection and transferring Bella's old collection onto her new iPod while the rest were preparing lunch. At lunch time Bella was giddy to open her new camera. It looked perfect with her, she persisted to take photos of everyone and everything. She was having so much fun, just like a birthday should be. After lunch, camera still in hand, she asked that she could transfer some DVD tokens and asked the whole family to join. We watched several films, none of them captured my attention. Bella was in my lap, examining and playing with her new camera. Night time strolled around quickly and Bella looked tired, straight after dinner I ran her a warm bath.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do you stay with me while I bath and stuff?"

"I don't like to leave you Bella"

"That is adorable" she said opening the door, which shocked me, I had been leaning against it. I fell back and landed at her feet. She giggled down at me and cautiously stepped around me. I quickly rushed into the shower while she got dressed for bed. I raced back to her room once I was also ready for bed.

"Okay Bella, time to test out your new iPod?" she merely nodded in a sleepy reply. She was just about to snuggle down into bed when she turned to look at me curiously.

"I didn't use my iPod last night" she stated

"Did you have a nightmare?"

"No" she started to walk towards me slowly, I met her half way, wriggled my arms around her waist.

"You kept him away Edward" she said hugging me tightly. I pulled away to look her straight in the eyes. She was so content. I hugged her tightly, lifting her of the ground again. Only this time she didn't let her legs fall, she wrapped them around my waist tightly. I pulled back to look at her curiously. She suddenly panicked and loosened the iron grip she had created around my waist. I was still looking at her in the eyes, they screamed sorry and slight embarrassment. I moved an arm to her lower waist and pulled her back, tighter to me. She smiled widely and kissed me passionately. Her hands tangled in my hair, she pushed her light frame into mine. I grasped her hip tightly with one hand and the other was stroking her beautiful neck line.

She gasped for air, when we broke away. My breathing pace had certainly increased. She paused and bent her head and pressed it on my chest over my heart. She giggled as she heard it thumping loudly. I walked towards the bed slowly and put her down carefully, I lent down to listen to her heartbeat – it certainly wasn't steady. I looked up at her and gave her a 'laugh at my erratic heart beat will you? Check yours out my wonderful Bella' look. She continued to giggle.

"Can you stay here again tonight?"

"No"

"Why not?"

"Because, your bed is much too small, where as mine is much larger and you are very welcome in it"

"Well I like my bed"

"That I'm glad, would you prefer to enjoy it on your own or come up to my room?" I questioned, she pondered momentarily and jumped back up out of bed, and stood in between my legs.

"Do you have milk in your room?"

…….

**BPOV **

"Hey Bella?" he murmured into my exposed ear. He was right; his bed was a lot bigger. But Edward and I were still cradled together in the middle of the bed as if it was mine.

"Yu-uh" I moaned sleepily, barely opening my mouth

"You're getting sloppy with this whole waking up thing" he mocked.

"No, you are just getting better at setting alarms" I mocked back, I open my eyes slowly to see him turning off the alarm setting on his bedside clock.

"Gotta cha" I whispered, sprawling out on top of his chest.

"Ahaa, that you have" he said wrapping his arms tightly around me. I raised my head a little so I could kiss his beautiful lips. He reacted big time; he pulled me up by my waist so he could investigate my mouth with his intoxicating tongue. I moaned as he released my mouth and started placing fiery kisses down my neck and along my collar bone. That is when I saw the time.

"Edward!" I shout-whispered.

"What?" He said reaching my eyes again, shock and panic covering his. "I'm sorry I won't do that again"

"Edward it is _three_ thirty!" I hissed, rolling of off him.

"But I wanted to take you somewhere again today" he hushed crawling over to me, yes I had been very childish and rolled all the way to the other side of the bed.

"Where?" I quizzed, turning to see him – intrigued.

"That's a secret" he whispered against my lips. He had gotten a lot closer. I forgot that it was three thirty and threw myself against his lips. I manically tangled my hands around his neck and in his hair, pulling myself closer to him. He took a sharp intake of breath as I rolled onto my back so he was on all fours above me, he swept one arm underneath my back and brought me closer to him, the other supporting his weight. I pulled myself into him, I wrapped my legs around his waist again. He gasped for air and I travelled down his neck with heated kisses. I ran back up his jaw line and under his ear. He moaned with pleasure as I grazed his earlobe with my teeth. I placed a final feathery kiss in between the bottom of his ear and his jaw line. I broke away and smiled wickedly. He mimicked my smile. I turned him over so I could listen to his heartbeat again. He laughed, which shook my head resting on his chest.

"Bella"

"Shh" I interrupted him and waved a shh-ing hand at him. As I listened to the not-so-steady heartbeat it slowly soothed back down to a normal pace as he stroked my long hair down my back, making me shiver as he reached the exposed skin below the line of my vest top.

"So where are we going?" I questioned as I moved back up to him, I rolled onto my stomach, being supported by my elbows. He followed suit and rested on his elbows only he was lying on his back.

"Some where you might want to take your camera"

…….

As soon as I realised I raced from bed, had a quick shower, and got ready to go; some scrappy jeans, a white vest top and a long sleeved dark red cardigan. As I was about to bolt down the stairs I opened the door and bumped into Edward. He chuckled to himself but I shh-ed him with a quick kiss, I didn't want anybody to wake up did I? I wasn't just kissing him because I wanted to, sometimes I _had _to.

"Shh, everybody is still asleep" I whispered as I brushed the hair out of my face. He caught my hand and brought it up to his lips. He kissed my knuckles lightly and then covered his lips with my hand and nodded his head obediently. Camera in hand we made our way out.

The walk took us at least twice as long as usual. I found so many beautiful colours and flowers, and not to sound creepy but I kept nabbing sneaky pictures of Edward, he was so beautiful. He never lost his patience with me though, he let me be; watching as I pranced around an object trying to get the right light balance and the right angle. When we got there it was like I almost had forgotten how beautiful it was. I ran up to Edward, because some how this place always paralyzes me with the sight of it. I always stand still at the edge of it before the shock has warn off while Edward wanders into the middle and basks in the sunlight streaming through the canopy of trees.

"We missed the sunrise didn't we?" He nodded in response, this was my fault. He noticed my moodiness and hastily walked to my side.

"There is a sunrise every single day Bella" he whispered to me, pulling me in for a hug.

……

**EPOV**

I loved watching her being so happy, the walk there did take twice as long but I couldn't care less, my family with such a simple gift had given her something so incredible. Every time she spotted something pretty something would spark inside her and her whole face would light up. And I had noticed that she was taking 'sneaky' pictures of me, I let her have her fun, I noticed that after every single time she got one of me she would giggle like an adorable child.

We had missed the run rise, but we stayed there for six hours; we had talked and talked, kissed and kissed, and kissed… She took lots more photos, I even managed to get her to take some of us together. It is amazing what you can learn in six hours about a person and you wouldn't even have to talk to them. She _even _showed me her photos that she had been taking; she of course skipped the 'sneaky' ones of me but was overjoyed to show me the ones of everyone else yesterday. They were beautiful, and I'm not sucking up to the girl that I love and adore, they were stunning photos and she hadn't even edited them, I doubt that they would need editing.

"So why the special outing?" she quizzed, playing with my fingers as she had the first time we had came here together

"Oh so there has to be a reason for me to take my beautiful girlfriend to such a beautiful place?"

"Well no, just last time you brought me here I was set to endure a hard day shopping"

"Ah, its not that exactly"

"Oh Edward, what are they doing to do?"

"This is going to sound really strange but they kind of want to lock you in the studio until you paint something for them?" My lovely sister and her best friend had gone _really _crazy this time.

"They cant do that can they?" she looked up at me innocently.

"Bella" I breathed "They said it was either this or shopping, I think that you better just do something that you enjoy, I'm sorry"

"No, no it is okay" she smiled brightly, "I do like to paint"

……..

When we got back to the house it was ten thirty, Alice was bouncing of off the walls with excitement. Everybody was downstairs and eating breakfast, we joined but not for long as soon as Bella was done Rosalie and Alice rushed her upstairs in a hurry. I followed, I didn't want to not see her for _so _long with out a goodbye. Bella was standing in front of the door sternly.

"Alice, before I begin, I need you to print off some pictures for me, as my research" Bella said firmly, Alice nodded.

"And Rose, I need a sketch book to well sketch my ideas, because I gather that you have already gotten me a canvas?" they both nodded, "Go on then" Bella continued with a sigh, they both nodded and quickly ran towards me, I barely had enough time to move out of the way. I was squeezed up against the wall and Bella started giggling.

"You seem to be enjoying this" I said smoothly walking towards her.

"You know what, I think I am going to" she said wrapping her arms around my neck.

"Hmm, well I bet that soon you will stay in this room forever and never come out to see me" I moaned like a child.

"Well, that _is _a possibility" she mocked with a gloriously wicked smile on her face. I ravaged her lips with mine. Trailing hot kisses down her neck. I accidently pushed her against the door but she just giggled against the passionate kiss. She opened the door, escaping my hold. She ran into the big white room and was paralysed with shock again. I walked over to her and slide my arms around her waist. I started placing light kisses on her collar bone. Suddenly she turned to me, a wide smile on her face, her eyes shimmering over. I tightened my grip and pulled her upwards so she could wrap her tiny legs around me. She nestled her head into my shoulder and placed one little feathery kiss on my neck, enough to make me shiver. I held her like that for what seemed like forever, but it still wasn't long enough. She pulled her head back up and looked me dead in the eye with entertainment rushed through them.

"I have an idea"

"Oh do you now Bella?" she nodded and bit her lip childishly, like she was containing her idea until she had permission to let it flow out.

"Well, go on then" I coached, she smiled brightly at me and I couldn't help but mirror.

"I could say that you have to stay"

"I would love to Bella, believe me I would. But I don't think that we would be able to pull that off" I moved one hand carefully from supporting her and placed it lightly on her cheek, stroking smooth gentle circles on her cheek with my thumb.

"But you saw them, they were doing all sorts for me, they were like little children"

"Yeah little fierce impatient children" I remarked. She burst out laughing and I obviously joined. A big flash interrupted our laughter. I turned Bella and myself to face the door. There was the exact same fierce little impatient child with a camera in hand, showing the picture she had just got to Rosalie who congratulated her.

"Edward, get out"

**BPOV**

Edward gently put me down, placed a delicate kiss on my forehead and walked out of the room. Childishly waving manically once behind Rosalie and Alice. I chuckled lightly.

"Okay, okay, we get it – you guys are all 'happy' and 'in love' but we sorry _you_ have some serious painting to do" Alice remarked. MY smile merely grew at my thoughts going back to Edward.

"So we got you the photos and the sketch book, what are you going to paint?!" Rosalie asked impatiently.

"All in good time my wonderful friends, now adios" I shooed them out of the room, they obliged but I could tell that thye didn't go far. I knocked on the inside of the door loudly, I heard them squeal.

"Bella please let us in, or at least tell us what you are going to do?" Alice whined

"Alice, is my iPod in here?"

"Um yeah, connected to the speakers why?"

"I will call when I'm done okay? Now scat" I shouted playfully, I waited until I heard their footsteps lightly skip down the stairs before I turned away and wandered towards my lovely new iPod. I knew exactly what I was going to paint, I would never tell them that yet though. Music was on shuffle and I could begin; I started to hang up several of the photos around the space where the canvas was. I quickly sketched out some drawings and tested some new paints. Shit I got paint on my cardi. I couldn't get paint on anything. I decided that instead of doing the sensible thing like getting changed I decided to un-dress and paint in my underwear. No body was coming in until I told them to so I was safe. I decided that I would only start painting when the right song came one, first song, first stroke. I waited listening to the songs fill the air until Florence and the Machine, Cosmic Love starting playing and the beautiful lyrics took me away.

………

**EPOV**

I had nearly grown as impatient as Alice and Rosalie. They had placed lunch outside the room for her but she instructed that no body was to come in. It was driving me crazy. She had been away for longer but there was something unknowing that was driving me mad. "Dinners ready everybody" Esme called from the kitchen. Alice and Rosalie stared at each other for a millisecond and sprinted up the stairs. I sprinted quickly after them, lucky that I was the fastest. "No! Let me see her first" I yelped when I had reached the start of the corridor, they were knocking impatiently on the door. No wonder Bella couldn't hear the music was booming, if it wasn't for our house being so large it would shake the foundations. I ran up to them and met them by the door.

"Well you did knock" I said

"Yeah we did, we have to go in…" Alice said mischievously

"Yeah and dinners ready" Rosalie added in matter-of-factly. Alice's hand was the first to reach the door knob, she turned it slowly, raising the suspense. "Oh come on Alice" I coached her on, it was driving me mad! I wanted to see her, what she had created. The door suddenly flew open, Bella still hadn't noticed. She was standing, bum poking out, on the stool, painting the top corner of the canvas. Did I mention that she wasn't wearing clothes? Yeah she wasn't, her glorious body. She had a white bra and a matching pair of small knickers. She looked like an angel, so innocent, so glorious. Alice and Rosalie gasped, I hadn't seen the painting yet, I was too busy looking at the mostly naked form of my girlfriend and I don't care how weird that sounds you would _so _do it too. She was slowly and carefully stepping down of the stool, but as she was getting down she turned towards us; to see the three of us gawking at her and the painting. She looked so beautiful, her wild hair fell down perfectly between her shoulder blades, her flat stomach, her breasts – not to sound crude, but they were there and I couldn't help but notice them – looked delicious, her long legs looked even longer. Her underwear seemed to melt into her pale skin. She didn't look angry, upset or embarrassed. She just looked at me, admiring her. She bit down on her glorious lips and it was like time froze. Alice and Rosalie disappeared for a fraction of a second and it was just Bella and I transfixed, staring intently into each others eyes, her paint brush fell against her arm, then I noticed that she was covered in paint. She started giggling profusely when I started to laugh.

"Bella, I'm glad you took your clothes off! Look at the state of you, you are covered in paint" Rosalie remarked. Bella had green, blue, yellow, purple, okay she had about a trillion colours splattered over her perfect – mostly naked – body.

"Dinners ready" I choked, hold on where did my voice go? Bella started giggling again. I coughed to speak louder, "Dinners ready Bella". She continued to smile at me. She walked towards the speakers and turned down the music.

"We did knock" Rosalie defended

"Don't worry guys I'm not mad, I had just finished anyway" She dramatically waved her arm in front of the canvas, like pulling down an invisible curtain.

"Holy crap" Rosalie uttered quietly. Bella stood to the side of her master piece, scrutinising it. Bella had really, really out done her self. She had painted a wide canopy of trees, very figurative. Including many intricut branches, spreading all over the canvas, except there was something about the leaves. Rosalie, Alice and I all simultaneously walked forward to look at them in a closer inspection. She had painted them as eyes, from the middle of each leave there was a small black spot, and from that she had painted the out going lines that create the colour in the pupils. She had used very tone of green I would have thought imaginable. I then darted my eyes around the room, she had hung pictures that she had taken to day up around the canvas. She had many pictures facing upwards of the trees, showing the long trunks and the mishmash of branches. There were a couple of pictures of me, she had circled my eyes. It was a bit surreal, and one beautiful picture hanging above the canvas was a close up of my eyes.

"Oh Bella" I said turning my attention to her, she was standing still awaiting out reactions. I looked at her in awe. She smiled widely, the end of her paintbrush pointing at the side of her cheek. I picked her up in a big hug. Her feet were no where near the ground. I had grabbed her by the waist, thrown her upwards and caught her again. I was basically hugging her mid-rift. She giggled as my hair tickled her stomach. I lowered her slightly, so I was face to face with her.

"I don't think words would be enough to tell you how beautiful it is and how perfect you are"


	21. Chapter 21 Kiss&Tell

**BPOV**

"I don't think words would be enough to tell you how beautiful it is and how perfect you are" he said lightly to me, he always knew exactly what to say, so bloody perfect and romantic. He was still holding me tightly, and surprisingly I wasn't hyper-aware that I was only in my underwear, I wasn't even hyper-aware that Rosalie and Alice were still standing in the room. I wrapped my bare legs tightly around my boyfriend and he hugged me tightly. Have I mentioned yet, throughout this whole process of me 'revealing' my painting – which I was actually proud of – Alice had not said a word!

"Edward would you mind putting Bella down for just a quick second?" Alice basically whispered she was so quiet. I nodded quickly to Edward for him to put me down, he sulked slightly. I nodded at him once more urgently; he put me down steadily straight away. I walked over to Alice carefully, she was still staring at my painting.

"Yeah Alice?" I said quietly, I quickly looked to Rosalie for guidance but she merely shrugged.

"Come here you beautiful, beautiful girl" she whispered again, only walking towards her did I realise that her eyes were nearly flooding with tears. I hugged her so tightly. "Alice come on, it's not that bad is it?" I laughed, trying to lighten the mood. She let me go and held me at arms length in front of my painting.

"Bella, take me seriously now" she said sternly, still holding me. I merely nodded.

"Bella, you are so freaking beautiful and so freaking talented" she said between shaky breaths.

"It actually breaks my heart to know that you might not have had the chance to flourish, to have the happiness that you really, really deserve. Please never forget that" Alice said slightly more confidently to me. Her breathing had steadied but her eyes were filling with more tears. As were mine.

"And that thing" she said pointing to my canvas, I had to turn to look at it before she would continue; "It is amazing! How did you take something so boy and make it so beautiful" She said while softly wiping the newly formed tears running down my cheeks with her tiny fingers.

"I second that!" Rosalie said loudly, clearing her own tears, running towards Alice and myself; grabbing us in a big hug.

We didn't break contact until Edward cleared his throat. He crossed his arms across his chest childishly, I giggled at his sulkiness. I rushed over to his warm embrace. He picked me up again; I giggled some more, wrapped my legs around his waist and tangled my hands in his hair. He moved his hands quickly to my waist but wrapped one around my neck, pulling my head closer to his.

"Guys we do have dinner?" I heard Rosalie say, I tried to turn around but Edward kept me still, we hadn't kissed yet but I could tell in his eyes that he wasn't about to go to dinner.

"I don't think they are hungry" Alice replied.

"Oh they are, just not for food" Rosalie mocked, Edward stifled a giggle and I smiled widely. I heard Rosalie usher Alice out of the room and close the door behind us.

"Bella you are so beautiful" he said stroking my cheek, arriving his hand back to the back of my neck. I blushed.

"Why does everybody tell me that?" I questioned, he looked astounded.

"Oh Bella!" he said in shock.

"What?" Instead of answering me, he threw his lips against mine. I kissed him back, he grabbed my waist and pulled me up further so my legs were wrapped around his muscular abdomen, and that my head was bent down kissing him. I clasped my hands in his hair, he gripped me tighter.

"Edward" I whispered with pleasure as he placed feathery kisses down my neck, along my collar bone, down to the curve of my breasts. His soft kisses were so well soft. He is going to make me crazy. I pulled his head up to look me in the eyes. I saw lust, then some panic as I continued to hold him. I couldn't resist, I leant in to kiss him passionately again.

"Jesus Christ!" Emmett shouted from the door. I jumped down out of Edwards hold and crawled behind him, still being very much undressed. Edward stood in front of me, spreading out his harms so that Emmett couldn't see me still being very much undressed. I pulled on Edwards sleeve, he turned back to look at me and I pointed over to where I had placed my clothes. He walked over, as I crawled behind him. He stood in front of me as I quickly put on my clothes.

"That was the definition of get a room" Emmett chuckled to himself as he wandered further into the room. I hopped up behind Edward, after being dressed again.

"Funny thing Emmett, we were in a room – and _then_ you stormed in" I commented, rather proud of myself. Edward laughed and nodded in agreement.

"Well yeah I guess but still, you were at least three quarters naked" Emmett said… loudly.

"Who was three quarters naked!?"

…….

**EPOV**

Okay, so Carlisle wasn't that pissed, he was just 'concerned' about our behaviour alone together. I mean at least it was Emmett instead of Carlisle when he first came in. That would not have been acceptable, Bella; legs around me, hands knotted in my hair, and "three quarters naked". I on the other hand looked perfectly innocent kissing her everywhere I could reach at least my hands were at safe places… Kinda…

We didn't have to go to dinner, they had finished but left us well left over's. We ate in the kitchen, but under the strict eye of Carlisle, safe to say that we were pretty much silent. When Bella went to go have a bath Carlisle had said that he needed to 'talk' to me I believe that 'quickly' was also mentioned. But this conversation was not over fast enough;

"_Well Edward, I know that Emmett likes to exaggerate but would you like to explain what Bella was doing any percentage naked?" I could tell that he was secretly enjoying watching me squirm, and squirm I did, the truth didn't make any sense. But I was not going to lie. _

"_Um well Bella was painting, which it would have been nice if you commented on by the way, just saying you haven't yet and she worked so hard on it and it was so beautiful" _

"_Edward" Carlisle hissed, "I'm affaird I could not concentrate on her probably spectacular painting because I was to busy getting over the shock of hearing that Bella was in fact 'three quarters naked'" Why did they have to keep brining that up? I mean she is probably fully naked now. Bad thoughts… _actually rather nice thoughts._ No shh, bad thoughts. _

"_Right, sorry Dad" I mumbled _

"_Continue Edward" he commanded_

"_Yeah, sorry, of course. So Bella was painting and she didn't want to get any paint on her clothes, but she couldn't come out of the room to get changed because of Alice and Rose so she decided that she was going to be safe until she called us in, but Rosalie, Alice and I obviously didn't know about her clotheless state and went in to tell her about dinner."_

"_What a strange set of events" _

"_I know" I mumbled,_

"_Well, you still haven't explained why Emmett was so shocked" _

"_Dad, don't make me" _

"_I'll make you do whatever I like son. I think I need to know" he smiled, he couldn't hold in anymore about how much he was enjoying this. _

"_We were just kissing Dad I promise" he pondered over my honesty for a while. I could tell that he was about to talk about. Just breathe Edward, it will be fine. _

"_I think it is time that we talk about being 'safe' again" _

I'm going to stop there. The last five minutes of that conversation were _so _painful. My Dad talking about contraception, whipping out his wise old doctor man knowledge; nicely done…

When I went to go and say good night to Bella, she was looking shameful.

"Hey" I whispered, she was already in bed, crawled up, facing me. I crouched down by the side of her tiny bed.

"Hey" she whispered back. Moving her hand out slowly to mine, she intertwined her fingers in mine.

"I'm sorry" she continued

"Sorry?! What for?"

"For the sex talk you just had to endure"

"How did you know about that?"

"Esme gave me one"

"Oh no"

"Oh yes" she mocked, making me laugh.

"I think I should be saying sorry then"

"Why's that?" she quizzed

"Well becauseI am the one with the embarrassing and intrusive family"

"No! You shh right now. You and you're family have given me everything. And I'm not just talking about the presents and the clothes, they have made me feel safe. Whatever your family do to me, I don't care. I deserve nothing from them, or you, and you have given me everything I could of ever imagined" She was welling up, I stroked her tears away but Esme burst through the door ran up past me and hugged Bella tightly.

"Bella, my darling" she cooed to Bella, she continued when she released Bella. "You are so, so, so, so, welcome" she was standing by the door now. Are we not even going to mention the fact that she was listening in to our conversation? I looked to Bella, she was stroking her tears but she caught me and shiftly shook her head.

"Night, night Bella" Esme waved, closing the door behind her. Nothing for me then? Glad to hear that I am _so _loved.

"Oh and you too Edward" she shouted back. I laughed. Bella was sitting up now, she beckoned me onto the bed. Once I was perched on the edge of the bed she grabbed me in a tight hug. I hugged her back just as tightly.

"I love you" she choked, still crying. I pulled back, looking her in the eyes. I stroked her soft face.

"I love you too"


	22. Chapter 22 Quiet

**BPOV**

Edward didn't stay in my room. He had to leave, I did wonder why Esme had been listening in at the door but decided to dismiss it because I could never say a bad word against Esme. Carlisle and Esme had become parents to me. But that didn't mean that I would ever forget about Charlie and Renee. I woke up at the break of dawn again. You might wonder if I wake up at different times when the seasons change, like when its summer and it is the day breaks earlier, it used to be, but I worked out that _sometimes_ it conflicted with school. So now I have just got into the habit of waking up at five to five thirty.

I decided on my favourite pair of scrappy blue jeans, some 'white' plimsolls and a white shirt with that funny un-ironed, crinkled affect; it was oversized so I tuck the front into my jeans. I went downstairs after pulling my hair out of the plait, my hair went crazy. I skipped into the kitchen to the fridge; there was a note on the door, 'Call back Sue'. Why did I recognise that name? Hmm. Anyway after my short distraction I was enticed by milk. I poured myself a generous glass before sitting back down on the chair and just thought some things over. How this incredible family had changed my life so much.

"Hello darling" Esme chanted as she walked seamlessly into the room, bearing a beautiful silk dressing gown. Her face changed as she saw the note on the door.

"I see you have some milk yeah?" She questioned, I nodded in response and lifted it for her to see. She smiled weakly back at me; quickly crumpled up the note, she then rushed over to the bin and returned her attention back to me with a relieved smile. She's brilliant, but strange…

"What would you like for breakfast?"

"Um I don't mind, you don't have to make me breakfast Esme"

"Oh hush hush, I like making my family breakfast"

"Thank you" She started rushing around the kitchen, something clearly on her mind. She had decided to make some pancakes but refused my help. I just sat down, one earphone in and sipped on my yummy milk slowly. Before long everybody else was waking. Edward was down first; he walked over to his frantic mother and kissed her on the cheek. He then smiled brightly at me, giving me a generous but safe kiss on the lips; his mother was in the room. He gave me a silent 'what's up with her' look; I merely answered with a shrug.

"Okay darlings, pancakes are ready" she chirped as she delicately placed the plates in front of us, she held mine a bit longer when she placed it down. She was very careful not to look at me for too long, but she wanted to I could tell that much, her eyes kept fidgeting under her lids. Edward couldn't stand it anymore,

"Mum you're okay right?"

"Who? Me darling?"

"Yeah Mum, you are the only person I call Mum…Mum"

"Oh well yes I'm perfectly fine"

"PANCAKES" Emmett boomed running into the room. A very tired looking Rosalie trailing behind.

"Alice please" I begged when I saw her struggling downstairs with my large painting.

"Mum" Alice requested the attention of Esme

"Yeah honey" she said not turning around, she was too busy tidying away, or whatever she was doing.

"Where can _we _put this?!" she said, very giddy for a Monday morning

"Put what Alice?"

"Mum if you looked?!" Alice said growing in confusion and impatience.

"Sorry, I'm just distracted"

"No kidding" Emmett added from across the table, Esme's face fell slightly, "But you did very nicely with the pancakes Mummy" He apologised. Jasper stifled a giggle at big bad Emmett's use of 'mummy'. Which was amusing but Esme's behaviour was confusing.

"Anyway Mum, I want to put this somewhere special"

"Put what where?"

"MUM! Please, look over here!" Esme turned her head as commanded. Her draw dropped in awe.

"Oh Bella that is yours isn't it?" Esme asked, I nodded in reply, still rather embarrassed that Alice was showing it off like that.

"It is absolutely beautiful my dear" She said, raising her hands to wipe away some tears. What is it about my work that makes people want to cry?

"Thank you Esme" I replied.

"Right, well you lot better be off to school now yeah? It's getting pretty late"

"But Alice and Jasper haven't had breakfast"

"Well they can take some with them"

"Why cant we just eat them here?" Alice questioned persistently, Esme was about to blow.

"Why can't you just do as your told?"

"Mum?" Edward asked carefully

"JUST LEAVE!" we sat in awe. I didn't know what to do.

"I'm sorry, please, please just go to school, enjoy yourselves, learn and stuff" She repeated. I was the first to leave, I shouldn't be involved in this. Edward quickly followed. Esme was still standing in the kitchen, fuming. Edward whipped out his cell phone and rang Carlisle to tell him. Everybody else filed out of the room silently. I followed them to the car as we waited for Edward to drive us to school.

…….

I thought that today was just going to be the same as any other painful experience at school but it was different. On the way to school we drove in complete silence. I was seated in the back next to Rosalie, Alice was on Jasper's lap and Emmett was in the front. Alice had crawled into Jasper's chest. Emmett and Edward were silent and stone in the front. When we arrived it was weird; we kind of stayed in the car until the first person made the move, it was Edward, he hopped quickly out of his door and he opened my door for him, he was holding it open but he wasn't looking at me. I placed my hands lightly on his chest, begging for some, well just something. He looked down and smiled weakly, he clasped my hands in one of his and brought them up to his and kissed them strongly. He wrapped his over hand around me and pulled me in a tight hug. He rested his head on top of mine and gave me another kiss on the top of my head.

The rest of the lot were out of the car and were waiting by the front of the car.

"I'm sorry about this Bella" he whispered, still holding me in the hug, I pulled back slightly so I could see his beautiful eyes, they had shimmered over.

"Edward, it's not your fault" I stroked his face and tiptoed to leave a delicate kiss on his lips, not pushing him further. I walked slowly over to Alice grabbed her hand lightly and gestured to go to English. Jasper had his strong arm around Alice's shoulders pulling her into his side, her arm was still out stretched so I took it in my fingers and started stroking intricate patterns on the back of her hand. The teacher for English was still terribly sarcastic, I ignored him, I think that he was the only teacher that hadn't caught on that I pretty much already knew everything that they wanted to teach me.

Edward still came to collect me at the end of the lessons, we walked close together and hand in hand. He was so distant though, I realised what he must have felt when I was thinking about my birthday. But this was serious, by their reactions Esme clearly hadn't acted like this before, unfortunately for me, I had seen it many times before. But Esme was a god-send and her little out break was nothing compared to the troubles I had with a drugged up Renee. I still felt horrible. At lunch it was weirdly quiet again. I started doodling aimlessly on my notebook, waiting for the hour to pass. I did it in black biro but it ended up as a large leafless tree.

Edward and I walked to Biology, the silence is normally fine. But this one seemed like it had to be filled. We walked in, the teacher smiled at us weakly. I liked this one, he understood fully that this class was basically a free period for Edward and I; but we came and were obedient anyway.

"Class, it has reached that time in the first term where I can not be bothered… So enjoy this film about marine life" with that he flicked off the light switch and sat down at his desk and it looked like he fell asleep.

"Edward" I whispered about ten seconds into the film, he just turned to look at me instead of replying.

"Look, Esme is going to be fine" I leant my hand out to rest it on his arm. Luckily he didn't flinch away, he actually held my hand there. He smiled weakly,

"I know" he whispered back, he placed a free hand on my leg and started stroking smooth circles on my leg.

"Then what's wrong?"

"I want to know what made her like that, I don't like not knowing" I nodded in understanding. I rested my head on his shoulder, not knowing the answer. The hour went too quickly. Edward told me that the whole family were skipping gym, uncaring of how suspicious it looked. So we met them by the car, we clambered in and for the second time alone today I heard Alice speak,

"We should get her some flowers" she said weakly. We all agreed. Then I had an idea.

"Guys I have an idea"

…….

**EPOV**

Bella's idea was wonderful, Esme would love it. I just hope that she would tell us what had been bugging her. I hated seeing my mother like that, it just wasn't natural for Esme, and she always had a smile or something nice to say. I know I sound naïve but this just wasn't our Mum. I drove off quickly to the grocery store, we rushed inside to get the supplies needed and we paid together and rushed out again. The plan was that we were going to make a big poster saying "WE LOVE YOU", bit cheesy but Esme would love it, then we were going to all stand behind it looking happy and then using Bella's camera we will take a group picture with us holding it, and then we were going to print it off, laminate it, frame it, and give it to her with some flowers, which would also be featured in the picture.

"Okay so where should we do this?" Bella questioned.

"Somewhere that means a lot to her" Rosalie chirped, we sat in silence while thinking hard.

"The beach!" I proclaimed, she loved the beach near Forks. I mean it wasn't your typical beach but Esme had loved it. I waited for the cars agreement until I sped off towards the beach.

When we were there we all clambered out of my car. Bella got slowly out, she hadn't seen it yet. The beach was a small stretch of sand and stones. Basically, not a very good description but it was beautiful, and Esme loves it here. Bella looked on in awe and immediately whipped out her camera and started to run all over the beach taking pictures every where.

"Bella?" Alice called after her, Bella's attention went straight back to the task at hand.

"Sorry guys, it is _really_ pretty here" we nodded in agreement.

"Okay so we need the paper laid out with like stones holding it down yeah, is that cool?" she asked.

"Cool by us" Emmett boomed, and got to work, it didn't take long. The rest was common sense, we taped them together so it became one long piece of paper, we started to paint on the letters; first Bella had marked out the letters so it didn't go all wonky. We had brought enough paint and brushes for everyone to get one with their letters. We decided to take the pictures in front of the sea.

"Guys how about instead of just one picture we do like a collaboration of loads of different pictures of us, we have loads of time left?" Jasper suggested. We turned to him in shock

"Yes I do have a working brain, but will we not have enough time if you guys continue to stare at my gorgeous form" he continued. Alice bounded up to him and gave him a big kiss on the lips, and he wrapped his arms around her.

"COUGH, COUGH" Emmett boomed, our shocked expressions now turned to Emmett.

"Dude, you are actually meant to cough, not say cough, cough" I remarked. It was good to see that everybody was talking and happy again.

"Yeah" Emmett said defensively "I knew that, I didn't think that I could cough loud enough" We erupted in laughter and I saw Bella quickly nabbed a few sneaky shots of everyone laughing.

"Okay come on then every one" Rosalie instructed as Bella placed her camera and got ready to put it on timer.

"Ready?" She shouted over us,

"SIR YES SIR" We all boomed in unison. Bella clicked the timer and rushed over to join the line. "Okay look happy!"

"SAY MILK"

……..

**BPOV**

We had been on the beach for over an hour and we decided that we should stop. I had gotten hundreds of photos, but of course we couldn't print them all off. When we got to the photo printing place we all crowded around one small screen picking which ones we should print off. We picked some hilarious ones and then some cute ones. When they were done and laminated we rushed off to this antique shop where we chose this large vintage frame. We had gotten the flowers earlier so we rushed back home, hoping not to be questioned about the time.

But when we got home, it was dead. There were no lights on inside. We cautiously walked up to the door. One the front they had written a note

"Truly sorry about this morning, we have gone out - will be back in time to get dinner ready, all our love Carlisle and Esme." Emmett read out the note to us.

"Guys, we should cook dinner" Edward suggested.

"Hell yeah, they could be out for ages and I would starve!" Emmett commented, rubbing his tummy.

"Not what he meant, or was it?" Rosalie chirped

"No, it wasn't…" Edward continued, "I think that we should make them a really nice meal, and we can quickly get some pizza for us"

"That's a really good idea" I finally commented, it was Esme was always cooking for us, it would be really kind to give something back to her.

We decided on what we wanted to cook for them, some reason still standing outside. We clambered in with a set game plan, but when they reached the living room they were silenced.

"Hey what's up?" I questioned slowly trudging into the room. I didn't need a response; my canvas had been put some where special indeed. It has hanging in the plain space above the TV.

"I'm not sure if it was possible but I think that it looks even better up there" Jasper commented

"Here, here!" Emmett shouted

"Emmett seriously, what is wrong with you?" Rosalie joked, but he played upset.

"N'aww my big bear come here" Rosalie apologised – kind of – arms wide open. He quickly obliged and picked her up. The peacefulness of the hug didn't last long. He chucked her over his shoulder, fireman style and carried her to the kitchen.

"We have some cooking to be doing! Get in here!"


	23. Chapter 23 Skip

**EPOV**

We had been cooking in the kitchen for about an hour; I would say that it was all hard work… But it wasn't; it was really fun. I'm glad that Bella never put her camera down, some how we got sauce and flower every where. The girls had run out and set up the dining room, covered in candles and with the posh cutlery and they put the flowers that we picked for Esme and placed them beside the cutlery, after discussing how awkward it was to have a big pot of flowers in the middle of a couple while eating dinner because they couldn't see each other or the scent ruin the smell of the meal. Sounds productive doesn't it?

When they finally came home we were just finished tidying up the kitchen, we raced out of the kitchen and waited in the hall with our present for Esme, Emmett was holding it because the frame and the prints were actually very large and none of us could hold it.

They walked in slowly, Esme looked like she had been rubbing away tears, Carlisle looked saddened. I quickly scanned our group's reaction; they all seemed to do the same. We nodded and decided silently that we would continue.

"HAPPY BEING WONDERFUL PARENTS DAY" we had actually decided that earlier, we thought it would be a nice touch. Esme smiled brightly and Carlisle chuckled.

"This is for you" Emmett said flipping over the frame so they could bask in the glory of the front. They were both stunned in silence.

"This is" Esme said, choking back her tears "this is amazing" Carlisle was beaming from ear to ear.

"Thank you children" he said proudly. He simply branched out his arms, we continued to follow in to give a group hug to our wonderful parents. Hold on? Bella was missing. I looked back to see her on looking. She looked really happy, but she deserves to be with us.

"Yo Bells, get in with this hug" Emmett bellowed, glad that he did. I smiled that my family knew what was right, that she was a part of this family. I outstretched an arm so she would join the hug near me.

"Darlings, my wonderful darlings" Esme started once we broke the hug, "This is brilliant, so wonderful – where should we put it?"

"Oh I have an idea, you could take down my really embarrassing painting and you could hang it there?" Bella suggested, my family scolded her with cold looks.

"Bella, how on earth could some one as intelligent as you say something so ridiculous" Carlisle questioned mockingly. Bella just mumbled to herself, making me smile.

"I have just the idea, Emmett to the dining room" Esme instructed, as she led the way. We all giggled mischievously as they left the room.

"Excuse my language but holy crap!" Carlisle remarked, sending us all into fits of laughter.

"Carlisle" Esme hissed

"I'm sorry darling, but what other words would do for this?" Carlisle defended

"You do have a point there" Esme turned from the candle lit dinner we had created and looked at our giggling group.

"Holy crap!"

…….

After Bella had recommended that they eat before it got cold; we decided to go our separate ways without disturbing them while watching DVD's. Bella and I were up in my room, lying down perfectly peaceful, for once we weren't attacking each other with kisses. She had her head rested on my chest; she was playing with the hand attached to my arm over her shoulders. My other hand was holding her other hand that was flopped on my chest. Suddenly she jumped up and sprinted out of the room. To shocked to say anything I just sat up and waited for her to come back in.

She was out for _at least_ a minute; she came back in carry many pencils, colour pencils and a sketch book.

"Could you just hold your hand out?"

"What?"

"Like hold your hand out, like the way you were when..." She didn't finish, she shuffled back to where she had been, colours and sketch book in her lap.

"The effort I go through" Bella muttered, I let it go, she was enjoying her self. I believe that she was drawing my hand.

Thirty minutes later, and yes I mean thirty minutes later; Bella had finished

"Okay, okay I'm done…Wanna see?"

"Of course" she flipped her sketch book round so I could see an incredibly detailed and toned picture of my hand, even though it clearly was my hand it looked to pretty to be attached to my body.

"That is fantastic Bella" I complimented, she dropped her colours and sketch book carefully on the floor before surprising me and pouncing on me. Immediate contact with her lips made electricity run through my body, at _very_ high voltages. I positioned her on top of me. She twisted her hands through my hair and around my neck. I ran my hands up and down her back. We broke off for air,

"I love you so much" I whispered, stroking the hair hanging down behind her ears and leaving my hand on her cheek. She leant forward so her forehead was resting on mine,

"I love you too… A lot" she whispered as she smiled brightly. She leant forward again to reach my lips for light contact with hers.

"You two" I heard a knock at the door, Bella scrambled off me and settled herself to the place she was before.

"It's open" I called casually

"Time for bed now sweeties" My darling mother called, making me embarrassed that we still technically had a bed time and cringing at her casual use of "sweeties"… She looked in to see us snuggled up together, but she was distracted by the sketch book on the floor, she bent down to pick it up but paused and looked at Bella.

"May I?" Esme asked politely

"Of course you can" Bella answered, Esme opened the book and there on the first page was her latest drawing. She gasped in astonishment.

"Bella, one of these days I swear you are going to give me a heart attack with all these amazing pictures" Bella giggled and I laughed at my mother's amazement, I always prepare myself because I know that it is going to be amazing. I should say that out loud, I would be over-loaded with good boyfriend credit.

"But still, bed time now" Esme chanted as she practically skipped out of the room, "Oh before I go, thank you for tonight and my present. It was so amazing, and I'm sorry about this morning" We decided not to ask her about it until she was ready to tell us. Bella raced downstairs to get ready for bed as I did the same in mine. After I was done I sprinted downstairs to say good night to her.

"You ready?" I said as I tapped lightly on the door.

"Yu-huh" she said lightly back, I entered slowly, I cracked the door open slowly and then walked in. She snuggled down into bed, I went to crouch by her bed.

"Crap" she muttered when I reached her side,

"What? What's wrong?"

"I've left my iPod somewhere, I guess you have to stay" she toyed.

"Bella, I would love to but you know it was only yesterday that we endured that sex talk, I don't think that my parents want me to stay in here for a while" I replied, I would love nothing more than to stay in her bed, with her wrapped in my arms. But Esme and Carlisle were probably on patrol, waiting for me to settle in my own bed. She moaned childishly and crossed her arms over her chest dramatically.

"Come on now Bella, I have to go"

"But I don't want you to" she moaned again

"I don't want to either but I have to. Now where is your iPod" she shuffled around in bed and pulled it out from underneath her and smiled 'innocently'.

"Do you think that I wouldn't have noticed Bella?" I mocked

"Well you would be in bed already and then you wouldn't have been able to leave" she said edging towards me. I leaned closer, to whisper,

"Bella, I am much bigger than you and stronger, you couldn't keep me here"

"I have _ways _of keeping you here" she whispered seductively against my lips. I shivered and leaned forward to kiss her hard. I sat on the edge of the bed and she pulled herself upwards. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I pulled her onto my lap, leaving my hands on her waist. Our tongues danced and she pushed her little frame closer to me, I pulled her in tighter, then she shocked me by pushing me back so she could crawl on top of me, I was not complaining. She broke away and I involuntarily stuck my bottom lip out, she rested her head on my forehead but flew back down to my lips to lightly nibble on my bottom lip.

"Bella" I gasped as she trailed from my lips to my jaw line.

"Yep" she answered cheerfully, quickly removing her lips from contact with my body. She rested her head back onto my forehead, I moaned at her, she just officially played me and I was mere putty in her hands.

"See?" She questioned playfully, rolling off me and shuffling back into her bed.

"Um no not quite, would you mind showing me again" I teased as I went to crouch by her. She merely shook her head at me, her eyes were struggling to keep open.

"Right you, iPod?" she nodded and waved it.

"Milk?" I questioned, she pointed to the glass on her bed side table.

"I only ask for you Bella" I pointed out

"I know Edward" she out reached a hand and placed it lightly on my cheek, but her sleepiness let it fall.

"I love you Bella" I whispered, leaning forward to place a light kiss on her fore head. She grabbed my head delicately with her petite hands, placing them on my cheeks.

"I love you too Edward" she said pulling me in for another light kiss that left my lips tingle. I got up to leave her room. I made sure that she had her earphones in before I closed the door. I loved telling her that I loved her; it felt so right. I was just passing the stairs when I over heard Esme and Carlisle talking at the bottom.

"We have to tell her tomorrow Esme" Carlisle said sternly, with a sad look on her face.

"But she is so happy at the moment"

"Think about it this way darling, how happy will she be when she finds out that we didn't tell her about the third year anniversary of her fathers death?"


	24. Chapter 24 Run

**BPOV**

Hello Sun; even though in Forks is under cloud cover 93.2 percent of the time in the mornings I was always blessed with the sun stroking my face. I sat upright and looked groggily around. I looked to my clock and yes it was exactly 5:31.

I trudged downstairs, after getting dressed in a dark blue cropped top, I had a plain white vest underneath, and as usual I wore my favourite jeans. I scuttled to the fridge and got my glass of milk. I wasn't sitting long before I got bored, ran upstairs to get my sketch book. Shit, it was still in Edward's room.

I waited outside, thinking carefully about if I really needed my book. And I did… I opened the door silently. I peeked in to see if he was awake; he was sound asleep – also very much topless, his strong, muscular body was perfectly structured basically, drool worthy, but I have control. I tiptoed into the room and luckily I my book was on the floor. I picked it up gently and started to pick up my colours. Why did I have so many? Oh yeah I remember because the Cullens are way too generous. I finally had them all cradled against my chest and turned to walk back out. I tiptoed back out of the room, but my sketch book impaired my vision of the floor, which is very necessary for me to walk. Suddenly I walked into a small dresser.

"Shit, shit, shit-y Mc-shit, and shit" I murmured to myself, my knee was killing me, I was seriously going to bruise. I had made an impressive thump but Edward merely stirred in bed. I reached the door and just opened it when I heard him stir some more I turned around to see if, yep, he was resting up in bed leaning on his elbows.

"Bella?" he questioned groggily

"Sorry Edward, I just had to get my sketch book. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you" he shook his head furiously, waggled his finger at me. I walked quickly over to him, placing my art stuff on the edge of the bed before rushing around the other side to sit by him.

"You look really happy today Bella" he said raising a sleepy hand to my face.

"I do?"

"Yeah, you do" he said wrapping and arm around my neck and pulling me gently towards his chest. I chuckled as he flopped back into bed, his arm still holding me close. I wiggled and he loosed his grip; I straightened myself, still inclined towards him. I was happy, I kept smiling, he was too. I bent down to kiss him lightly on the lips. He was surprisingly alert for this time in the morning; he pulled me closer to him, kissing me fiercely, not that I minded. He pulled me on top of him. His hands were on the small of my back, put playing with the edges of my vest top.

I couldn't help myself, I know it was bad but I just couldn't stop myself; I released his mouth and started trailing kisses down his neck, along his collar bone and further down the contours of his perfect chest. His breath hitched as I traced where my lips had been with my delicate fingers. I wimped out when I reached the line of his boxers; I moved my lips back up and kissed his mouth lightly. He moved one hand to the back of my head to cement me against his lips. He pulled me up by the waist so he could explore my mouth more with his fascinating tongue. I played with his tongue as they danced together and his hands played with my body. One cold hand ran up my back underneath my vest, the other was lightly placed on my neck. He removed his hand from my back and involuntarily moaned. He pulled away from the kiss and looked at me quizzically in the eyes. I didn't know what he was asking me…

"Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"What's up?" he quizzed

"What do you mean what's up? Nothings up"

"You moaned, did I do something wrong?" he replied, looking generally shocked.

"Oh that was because you _stopped _touching me" he chuckled, rolled me gently so I was on my back and I giggled like a well like a girl I guess as he leaned over me.

"So you like it when I touch you?" Edward asked coyly.

"No she certainly does not!" Esme bellowed from outside the door. Edward grew bright red, I mean for once it wasn't me that blushed! It was adorable, but I cackled wildly. I wandered innocently out of his room, picking up my art things. I was met outside the door with a very pleased looking Esme. She smiled wickedly at me before glaring at Edward's cowardly form now completely submerged by the covers. I chuckled lightly, only just recovering from my fit inside his room. I skipped down the stairs back into the kitchen, seeing my half full glass of milk.

Walking into the room I nearly forgot what I wanted to draw anyway. But the view outside captured my mind again, I ran outside sat against the glass wall and started quickly. I wasn't aware of the time passing until Esme came out and sat beside me.

"Oh hey Esme, I didn't hear you coming"

"No don't worry that's okay" I wiggled around so my legs were straight in front of me and I put my sketch book to the side.

"Bella, I need to tell you something, and it is difficult okay"

"Yu-huh" I replied bravely. She outreached a hand and placed it gently on my leg.

"Okay, well" she steadied herself,

"Pheww," she breathed outwardly, frantically waving her free hand in front of her face like when you have something really hot in your mouth and you wave your hand trying to cool it down but your mouth is closed so you know it doesn't really work, well Esme was doing that now, she wasn't eating. She was trying not to cry.

"Okay, okay" she breathed again,

"Bella, it is the third anniversary of your father's death on Saturday. You've been invited to go to a remembrance thing at Sue's, I mean, your old house. I said that I would talk to you about it first"

"Yeah sounds good" I nodded silently and walked inside quickly; put my art stuff on the table, Esme rushed in behind me.

"Darling, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine Esme. I just, um can I go for a walk?" she just nodded, holding back her tears. I didn't have any.

I sprinted outside and ran for the forest. I knew that Esme was looking, but it didn't matter. I would be completely safe. I ran and ran, I had entered the forest and the trees disorientated me. I kept running and running, I surprised myself that I hadn't fallen over yet. I don't know why I was running, but for some reason I felt like I was Forest Gump and that I just had nothing in particular to run for. I would continue running until I couldn't run anymore.

……..

**EPOV**

After being woken by Bella's most welcome presence, kisses and touches; I was very awake. I had a quick shower, got dressed and raced downstairs to see her. But she wasn't there, Esme was sitting at the table on her own, a half full glass of milk sitting on the table in the seat beside her, she was staring off aimlessly into space.

"Mum?" I questioned

"Oh hi honey, do you want some breakfast" she turned to me, but her mind was else where.

"Mum where is Bella?" Her eyes quickly flashed out side, worry seeping through. I caught a glimpse of Bella's sketch book and pencils.

"Mum?!" I said, panic drowning my voice

"Honey, please calm down"

"Mum, I'm totally calm, where is Bella?" I persisted

"She just went for a walk"

"Please" I begged.

"It is the third anniversary of her father's death on Saturday. She said she was fine and that she just went for a walk"

"Did you see which direction she went in?"

"Edward you should leave her to come back to us"

"I am never leaving her, she can't do this on her own"

"Straight ahead, straight into the forest" she whispered, guilt dripping her words. I turned towards her and placed a light kiss on her head,

"It's okay Mum" I rested a quick hand on her shoulder and she held onto it for a second, once she let go I sprinted out of the house. She may not have known where she was going but I knew where Bella's feet would take her. I ran faster than usual, I ran and ran knowing exactly where I was going. I got there in just over five minutes.

When I reached the edge of the meadow, I bent over and panted in relieve as I saw her sitting in the middle, basking in the new sun. She didn't turn to me as I walked towards her, my breathing still haggard. She had her eyes closed, face titled up relishing in the early sunlight. She was cross legged. I stood behind her, unsure of what to say.

"Bella" I whispered.

"Hey Edward" she whispered back

"Do you want me to leave?" she didn't reply, she only shook her head slowly.

I wandered closer to her, sitting behind her with my legs spread around her. She shuffled back into me and let her legs out straight too. She rested her tiny head against my chest, I wrapped my arms loosely around her and she tied her little hands around my arms.

"Do I have a right to miss him?" she questioned quietly

"Of course you do Bella, he was your father"

"I don't even know if he was buried or cremated, I didn't even know what day he died, I didn't know what day his funeral was. For fuck sake I didn't even know he was dead!" she scream whispered, her voice broke and she couldn't go any louder.

"Bella!" I said firmly and twisted her around so I could look into her beautiful tear stained eyes. "Bella, look at me" she was avoiding eye contact, I moved a hand beneath her chin and lightly forced her to look at me. Her lips were shaking and her eyes were spilling tears.

"Bella, that was undoubtedly not your fault, you should have been told, you weren't. It wasn't your fault that you weren't here. It wasn't you fault that you have had such a shit life so far. You have every single right to miss him and your mother. I will spend every inch of my life trying to make up for the worlds cruelty to you, you deserve nothing less" She was crying furiously I pulled her into me and held her close. I held her for an unbreakable amount of time. She only pulled away so she could position her self more comfortably so she could hug me tighter.

When she had fully calmed down, she pulled back a weak smile on her beautiful lips. I moved the hair from her face that clung to the tear stains. I stroked the tear stains away.

"Thank you" she whispered

"Shh, you don't need to thank me"

"But you _always_ save me Edward"

"I don't have any other choice"

"How come?" she asked innocently.

"Because if I didn't save you, you would eventually disappear and that isn't an option" I responded honestly.

"Edward I love you so much" she cried as she fell back into our hug, she gripped me tightly and I hugged her back.

"I love you too" I whispered back into her ear.

She shivered and pulled back. She placed a light kiss on my lips. Our heads were so close, but we still weren't touching. I leant in to place another feathery kiss on her lips. We fell into lust but it was less demanding, slower. She pushed me onto my back lightly, I helped her position herself on top of me. She hovered over me, we stared longingly into each others eyes. She bent down to kiss me lightly again, I reached a hand up to her cheek. She reinforced the kiss, I ran my tongue slowly along her bottom lip. She moaned delicately and let me roam her mouth with my tongue. She rested a hand on my neck and the other slowly mingled itself into my hair.

I removed my lips from hers and trailed little kisses down her smooth skin, her light breathing hitched as I met the top of her cleavage. I ran small kisses along the curve of her breasts, but she demanded my attention back at her mouth. I obliged and kissed my way back to her lips. Before we made contact again she toyed with me, nearly letting our lips touch but lifting her lips, turning her head before we reached. She smiled wickedly as I moaned childishly, we started kissing passionately again.

I ran my hands down her back and when I reached the end of her top I played with the seam at the end. I could feel her nod slightly against the kiss; giving me permission. I slowly crawled my hands underneath her top, her beautiful skin was so smooth, my wide hands spread over her back, I explored her back but one hand slid to her stomach, she gasped at the contact. I rushed to get it back to safety, she stopped me, grabbed my hand and left it there; our lips never breaking contact. I lightly trailed my finger tips along her side. She giggled lightly, I was tickling her, I laughed lightly back. The sound of her laugh was delectable. I slowly wandered my hand up the back of her bra. Her breath hitched again as I squirmed my hands under the strap at the back. I removed them but she nodded against the kiss again.

I pulled away, sat up – Bella still straddling me came with me – she looked shocked and upset. I looked her straight in her honest eyes, where she could never hide her emotions from me. I brushed her hair from her face again; she smiled against the innocent touch. I had one arm wrapped under her bottom, how immature do I sound saying that? I awkwardly shuffled around so I could cross my legs. She left her legs out stretched behind me.

It started to rain lightly, we both looked up, watching it fall around us. Bella started giggling, I pulled her closely to me, she smiled up at me through her long eye lashes. 'I love you' I said with a small kiss on the fore head 'whatever the weather' she replied with a delicate touch to my cheek, and a smile up the sky. Nothing needed to be said, we sat there in silence, deep conversation running through our eyes.


	25. Chapter 25 Rain

**BPOV**

We had to leave our beautiful wet meadow, we were both soaking wet. His hair looked gorgeous, his shirt clinging to his chest. I don't think I could ever, ever thank him enough for helping me every time. I was so messed up, I didn't know what to think about my Dad's funeral thing. Edward truly helped me clear some stuff out, run it slower.

When we came back it was mid-day everybody else had gone to school, there had been a note left on my glass of milk, still half full. Edward raced over to it and read it out loud for my benefit;

"_Dearest Edward and Bella, _

_Carlisle and I officially granted you a day off, seeing that we have no idea where you went. I hope with all my heart that you two are okay. I'm sorry Bella, we will discuss it with you later. Have a nice day at home, behave… _

_All my love, Esme."_

It was impressive how she got all of that neatly onto one post-it note. Edward smiled at me and I beamed back.

"So Bella, it seems that we have the day and the house to ourselves" he said wrapping his arms around my waist.

"That it does"

"Well, what would you like to do today?" he said, softly into my neck.

"I fancy doing some painting" I answered honestly

"Painting?" he quizzed

"Yeah, unless you had something else in mind?" I teased

"Umm," he raised his eyebrow and bit his lip, but quickly shook the lust out of his head,

"No, painting sounds good" he let go of me and signalled that I could go ahead.

"NO!" I screamed, I turned in shock to the window.

"Shit!" I ran outside to where I had been sitting. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" I murmured as I looked down at my ruined sketch book, and I don't know that it was just a build up of held back emotions but I cried. Edward was by my side, in the pouring rain.

"Come on Bella its okay"

"It's ruined" I screamed

"Bella, we can get you a new one!" he shouted back to me, the storms were growing, thunder was shattering around us.

"No! No, you can't just replace something so important! It isn't right. I shouldn't have left it, I left it here to die"

"Bella, come on" he wrapped his big arms around me, around all of me, constricting my arms.

"NO! I can't leave him!" I screamed against the rain.

"I shouldn't have left him. He's gone, it's gone!" I struggled against his hold. My tears were falling like the rain around us.

"BELLA!" he yelled at me above the crushing storm. He turned me around.

"It wasn't a choice you were allowed to make! Stop blaming yourself for things that you could not control!"

"Bella please" he pleaded "please, please come inside!"

He held me close to him, I was still crying; but I had lost my energy. I pulled myself up against him and he picked me up. I wrapped my legs tightly around him, and buried my head into his shoulder. He wrapped one supportive arm under my bum and another around my waist. We didn't stay there long; he whisked me into the kitchen. He dropped me down gently and I walked towards the window; I crouched down to where my ruined sketch book was.

"Do you want me to get it for you?" Edward asked, crouching beside me.

"It's ruined now, the colour has run, the pictures aren't worth shit"

"They were worth everything to you" I just turned back to him. He picked me up and rested me in his lap.

We stayed there soaking wet, watching more of the rain pour down. It was only when I started to shake we moved. He ran upstairs and instructed I got undressed and ready for a bath.

"Bella you ready? I've run you a bath okay? It's hot so it will get your blood moving" he cracked open the door but had his head turned the other way. I was in a dressing gown so I pulled open the door making him fall back a bit. I laughed at him and he joined in. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

"Edward, aren't you going to get cold and ill?"

"I'll hop in the shower while you're in the bath, is that okay?"

"Yu-huh, this is going to be like the first bath I've taken without you there"

"Bella, you really don't grant me with enough credit you know" he answered confusingly as he led me to the bathroom.

"Bubble-bath" I said, a little bit excited.

"Yes Bella, a bath, with bubbles" he mocked,

"I'm going to jump in the shower, while you get in the bath, and then I'll race upstairs get dressed and stay with you in here until you are done. I wont be able to see because of the bubbles" he explained, what a wonderful boyfriend.

"Well, it seems you have thought of everything" I replied, he smiled brightly obviously proud of himself and ushered me to get in the bath. I slid out of my dressing gown's sleeves; he took them and spread them out so he couldn't see as I stepped out and into the lovely bath.

"Thank you Edward"

"It is always okay Bella" he said, bending over to kiss me on the fore head.

I closed my eyes and let the water sooth my cold body and my mind. I could hear the running water of the shower start. I tried not to think about his glorious body, I decided I'd take the calm time to think about my father.

He was my Dad, my only Dad. I had gone to Renee's funeral, which I had to organise, since that funeral I visited Renee every day for a month. Charlie, my Dad, had been dead for two years and I hadn't even known, I haven't paid him my respects. I wanted to go to see his grave, to say some things to him that I never had a chance to.

I heard the shower turn off, and I kept my greedy eyes shut as he ran out of the room. I opened my eyes as he came back in, he was carrying a chair. I looked at him quizzically.

"I'm not going to just hover by your side Bella" he answered, that was kind of obvious. I felt kind of dumb.

"You're not dumb Bella" How does he do that? He put his chair down very close to the bath tub and before he sat down he kissed my fore head lightly.

"Are you nice and warm and without hypothermia?" I asked casually,

"Yes, I am well, yourself?"

"I want to go to and see Charlie on Saturday"

……..

**EPOV**

Bella had decided that she wanted to visit Charlie's grave, it would be good. Well not good, good, but it would be not productive, but she would. I don't know. Once she got out of the bath and I got out of the room. I waited against the door, curious what could make her take so long. I couldn't imagine what she was going through or what she had been through, in fact I don't think I wanted to. All I wanted to do is be there for her, she could not do this on her own, again.

"Edward, move away from the door because I'm about to open the door and as hilarious as it is to watch your shocked face I don't think that it would be fair because you have been so good to me today" she chanted through the door. I did what I was told and was prepared to wrap my arms around her waist.

She opened the door, looked surprised but I wrapped my arms tightly around her. She smiled but wiggled out of my hold and skipped off to her room. I waited sitting against the door.

"Can you not stand up or something?" she questioned as I fell back into her room as she opened the door. I hopped up quickly. She looked lovely in some plain grey cotton trackies and a white long sleeved t-shirt.

"I can stand just fine" I retorted, slowly. So I like to look at my girlfriend and get lost in her glorious body and beautiful face, side affects may include losing track of time and losing your mind and heart because both now belong to her. She wrapped her little arms around my neck; I pulled her up so she could wrap her legs around me.

"Bella" she lifted her head from my shoulder.

"Yu-huh" she said, placing her head so it faces me on my shoulder.

"I think it's too late to start painting"

"Me too" she ushered, her words tingling my neck

"So what would you like to do?" I continued, I was swaying her slightly, she seemed really tired.

"You" she mumbled. That um what?

"I mean, some TV or something would be good" she quickly covered up, pulling her head up to face me. She stroked my cheek lightly. She didn't get down, I didn't want her to get down, but it would make walking difficult. I started walking to the stairs. I was stretching my neck around her to try and see my feet.

"Edward you can put me down" Bella said sensibly

"I don't wanna put you down"

"Well it's either that or we both fall down the stairs"

"Ah I have an idea, jump down a second" she complied; looking really confused

"Okay, now jump on my back" I continued

"Seriously?" I only nodded seriously before I turned around back away from the stairs, and waited for her to jump on.

"Fine" she muttured, she heaved her little frame onto my back. I shuffled her up and held her legs tightly as I started down the stairs.

"Bella?" I called turned behind, her still on my back. I planned to be immature for a bit.

"Yeah?" she answered, confused on my back" I turned to look up the stairs, "Where are you Bella?" I continued.

"Edward! I'm here"

"Where?" I said spinning around making her laugh at my foolishness.

"Edward, I'm in the fridge," she replied, I rushed into the fridge, careful not to drop her.

"In here?"

"Yeah"

"Bella, I can't see you"

"I'm behind the milk, pick it up, you'll see me", I complied and laughed

"Um, Bella you're still not there"

"Oh that's weird… I must be in the cupboard; you know the one with the glasses in?"

"I know that cupboard well" I spun around just for laughs, and she did, her beautiful laugh echoed through the empty house.

"Okay, so now the cupboard is open… I still cant see you"

"I'm behind a glass"

"Bella, you are behind a see-through glass?"

"Um yeah" she replied matter-of-factly

"Ohh, which one?" I questioned, this was going to be fun, well immature but entertaining.

"That one"

"This one?" I said pointing to a random glass

"No that one"

"Ahh this one?" I questioned again, pointing to another

"No that one!" she said 'distressed'

"This one?" I asked pointing to yet another random one.

"Yeah, that one"

"Okay, I still can't see you"

"Well thing is… You need to fill the glass with the milk"

"Why is that?" Ahh I had her there.

"I think well, because I said to" she answered, I poured the milk into the glass and put the milk back into the fridge. I placed it on the table.

"Okay Bella, I've done as you asked, can I see you now?"

"Um, I think I could work that out" she jumped down out of my hold and sat in the seat beside her milk, starting drinking slowly. I sat on the seat next to hers but shuffled myself and my chair closer to her, her little legs in between mine. I watched her as she drank her milk; I lent my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. She was dragging this out, she kept on looking down at me and the smile caught the side of her lips.

"Ahh, yummy milk" she said with a satisfied gasp as she placed the glass back down on the table.

"I know of something much yummier than milk" I said coyly as I straightened and pulled her chair closer to mine.

"What would that be?"

"Guess" I whispered against her lips, I quickly moved my lips to trace along her neck.

She sighed lightly as I continued down to the neck line of her top. She placed her cool hands on my cheeks, raising my head back up to hers, where I was quickly met by her lips. I grabbed her waist and lifted her onto my lap; her legs quickly wound themselves around me. She deepened the kiss and wrapped her arms tightly around my neck, her fingers playing with the ends of my hair. My hands were waiting at the bottom of her t-shirt; she pulled away and looked me in the eyes seductively. I picked her up and started wandering towards the kitchen as we begun to kiss again. I thought that walking down the stairs with me just carrying her was difficult but my attention was not on my feet it was on her lips.

Stumbling into the living room, I quickly decided that we weren't going to make it up the stairs. Every time I stumbled Bella would giggle, but quickly return to kissing me. The sofa sprung up on me, well it didn't I just hadn't realised that it was so close, and I, well, we fell over the back and she landed with a small thump on the sofa. I was able to stop myself from completely crushing her and held myself up by one arm placed by her head.

She started to cackle at me, I quickly joined in. She raised her hand up and placed I lightly on my cheek, trailing it through my hair to the back of my head; pulling me closer. She kissed me fiercely and quickly tangled her other hand in my hair, cementing my lips to hers. My hands trailed down her sides, when they reached the end of her top I hesitated, she wasn't ready, I thought to myself. She released my hair and moved her hand down her body to reach my hand hovering over her stomach. She slowly moved my hand under her top and lifted the end up slightly.

"Are you sure Bella?" I said looking down at her, staring intently into her eyes.

"Yes" she said confidently. I hesitated before kissing her again before she moved her hand back to my hair and pulled me in for another strong passionate kiss. I gently moved my hand back under the hem of her top, she sighed at the contact and urged my hand to continue. I roamed her flat soft stomach but it didn't feel right to go that high yet. When I reached there I wrapped my other hand under her top and wrapped it around her waist, I stretched my other hand around her back, pulling her closer to me.

We broke away, and her smile matched my wide smile. I pulled her up so she could sit on my lap again.

"So what do you want to watch?" she asked, looking around – still on my lap – for the remote.

"You" I answered absentmindedly, she looked up at me again, her eyes becoming very quizzical. I stroked a stray hair from her face and behind her ear.

"I do love you" I said blatantly.

"And I, love you too Edward"


	26. Chapter 26 Time

**EPOV**

It was really late when my family came home, like past dinner late. Bella had persisted that she wasn't hungry; she had some more milk and some fruit. I on the other hand was hungry, and because I can't cook she made me some chicken. I felt bad but she said 'it was the least she could do'. After that we got more ready for bed, we were only in comfy clothes anyway. Bella also said that she didn't want to sleep until they came home so we stayed downstairs and ended up watching some really retro cartoons because Bella said that she never used to watch cartoons, I said that she had been very deprived, but I retracted that statement, falling over my words. She told me that it was fine and eventually she distracted me from the guilt by kissing me.

But now, Bella was now sleeping gently in my lap. I was slowly nodding off to sleep. I was stroking her hair making sure that she was peaceful; I hate it when she is in my arms and she doesn't have her iPod on. I worry that I'm not enough to keep that brute away from her in her dreams, but she is calm, she is still and I wish that I could eventually wipe him out, but I think that he is too embedded. I was too tired to stay sitting up, I rolled her off of me gently and lay down beside her, she only stirred a little. She was facing me; her face was so peaceful, unlike how torn with emotion she was before. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her gently closer to me. I fell into a sweet dream.

"Shh, shh guys" I heard Esme whispered, I couldn't be bothered to open my eyes.

"N'aww look how cute they are" Alice commented quietly. I couldn't help but wonder in my sleepy state why they were out so late.

"He makes her so happy, look she smiles in her sleep" Rosalie commented also, I really wanted to check at see if it was true but I thought I shouldn't risk it, they would make me move, and I really didn't want to.

"Dude, he makes us look bad" Emmett 'whispered' to Jasper.

"Nah, really?" Jasper worried

"Yeah, he does" Alice chirped, trotting up the stairs

"Come on, lets leave them be" Carlisle ushered.

Once I was sure that they were all up the stairs I peeked my eyes open to see Bella. She had her eyes open too, she smiled widely at me as I smiled back. I placed a gentle kiss on her lips and she snuggled her head into my shoulder.

"Goodnight Bella" she nodded and mumbled some incoherent sleepy mess before falling back to sleep.

……….

**BPOV**

I woke up at sunrise again, well I judged it by that, I wasn't sure because I didn't have a bed side clock downstairs on the sofa. I had slept surprisingly really well. I feel bad that I don't use my new iPod as much as I used the old one but I take it to school and listen to it in class when I'm on my own. I didn't want to move, in case I fell off of the sofa and dragged the sleeping Edward with me and I didn't want to move away from him anyway.

I decided that since I didn't know what the time was that it would be safer to get up and get ready for school, seeing as I was rather absent yesterday. I shuffled out of his hold, grimacing as I went. He only shifted slightly as I skipped up the stairs to get dressed. When I slowly rushed, okay I know that is the most contradicting of adjective use of the year but I don't do well with rushing but I was so I like slow motioned rushed back down stairs. He was still stirring, his face looked sorrow. I rushed over to his side and crouched by the sofa.

I stroked his beautiful wild bronze hair back and out of his perfect face. His frown lifted and a wicked smile grew on his face. He was awake now; he grabbed me and pulled my body onto the sofa.

"Bella, you left" he moaned like a child

"Only because I didn't want to wake you" he stuck his bottom lip out, "But I came back didn't I?" he nodded slowly and I placed a little hand on his cheek.

"What time is it?"

"Last time I checked it was like 6"

"Six?"

"Yeah"

"How do you do it Bella?"

"I don't know, I have absolutely no idea. But I'm glad I do because this way you never hear me sleep talk" I spurted quickly

"You sleep talk?"

"Mildly"

"Bella that is silly, how can you mildly sleep talk?"

"Well waking up at five thirty every day is also silly, so I think that I can mildly sleep talk"

"You have a point, but I want to hear you sleep talk"

"Well you can't"

"Hmm, we will see about that wont we"

"No please don't, I don't think that'd you'd want to"

"Why?"

"Because I said so" with that I skipped out of the room into the kitchen, Edward following slowly. He sat down lazily in a seat, watching me while I got a glass of milk for me and sat beside him. I drank my milk slowly, watching Edward watching me. His hair was so wild from sleep, but his eyes were wide awake, the green tones so alive. The image brought back my memory of losing my sketch book, I wanted to capture the colour, but now I couldn't.

When I had been outside yesterday looking down at my ruined book all I could think about was Charlie, my Dad. I'd left him, he didn't know what was happening to me – how could he have. Edward was right, I couldn't have controlled what happened, even if I was here he would still have died. But all the logic in the world wouldn't nor couldn't blank out the fact that I miss him more than anything. I have always tried to think logically, that there was a defined reason and chance that the things that happened to me had to happen to me, because it just had to. Like if it was me, it was me because I had done something. Or that it was me because it had to be, because statistically it would have to be me. Statistics show that every one in twenty teenagers of my generation will have somebody from another generation fucking up their lives, and I happened to be that one in twenty for every one in Phoenix.

My eyes had drifted away from Edward, I was staring out the window trying to figure every thing out.

"Hey Bella?" he called back my attention, I turned to him and smiled weakly

"Yep," I answered 'cheerfully',

"Bella, don't keep things from me" he said almost sternly

"You'd just get angry at me; I'm thinking things you told me I shouldn't"

"Bella" he cooed as he crawled of his chair and crouched down in between my legs and moved the hair from my face so he could see my watery eyes.

"I am never angry at you, I couldn't be" he continued honestly, "I can't stop you from thinking that way; I wish I could but I can't. All I can do is tell you that you feeling that way is not fair on yourself, you haven't done anything to deserve what your life has played you" I shivered against his true words, I wiped the stray tears away. He stood up but bent over so he could pick me up in a tight hug.

………

Four days had been and gone since Esme told me about my father's third anniversary of his death, today is now Friday and tomorrow would be Saturday. Esme and Carlisle hadn't spoken to me about it again. I couldn't bring it up. We were at home again after a seemingly short day at school; it feels like time is whizzing by faster to get me to Saturday. I knew that time couldn't move faster, I knew that no body could control time but that is what it feels like; like time is catapulting me through time until I reach my destination

Edward had been very protective over me, I wasn't complaining, he would never leave my side except from when he had too. All week everybody had been obviously treading very carefully around me, hopefully after this they would all go back to normal, well if you could call a messed up homeless girl living with an incredibly rich and generous and lovely family normal. And I hadn't picked up a pencil, paint brush, colour or even my camera since Tuesday, they had noticed.

"Hey Bella" Carlisle called from the kitchen, my attention jumped up from my position; crossed legged on the sofa next to Edward, my head resting on his strong shoulders, the same that I had been crying on.

"Yeah" I called back, slowly getting up.

"Can we speak to you?"

"Yeah totally, sure" I was mixed with emotions; scared about the subject that was certain to come up, slightly happy that they were going to talk to me properly, because they hadn't since.

"Bella" Edward whispered as he clasped onto my hand as I got up,

"Yeah" I whispered back

"I'm here okay"

"I know Edward" I bent down gave him a quick light kiss on his lips, "Thank you" I whispered against them, pulling away again. I reached the kitchen quickly and saw Carlisle and Esme waiting for me sitting at the table. I walked towards them, not wasting time, and Carlisle nodded as I pulled out a chair.

"Okay Bella, we know this is difficult, but it is tomorrow, we need to discuss it" I nodded slowly. He continued; "Would you like to go?" he questioned blatantly

"No, well not with every body else there. I would like to visit his grave tomorrow, on my own" they were both silenced momentarily in shock by my statement.

"Are you sure that is what you want to do?" Esme questioned carefully.

"Yes,"

"Well, okay then" Carlisle said, clearly expected more of a discussion.

"What about Sue?" Esme questioned again, equally carefully

"Oh" I hadn't thought about her, which was foolish. Of course 'call Sue back' the name had called out to me.

"I'll visit her, but I don't want to see anyone else" I answered

"What ever is okay with us Bella" Carlisle chanted

"I know" I answered, accompanied with a fast nod.

"It'll be okay darling"


	27. Chapter 27 Black

**BPOV**

It was Saturday today. Just like any other Saturday except today I was going to visit the grave of my father; the father that I knew for 10 years of my life instead of the whole 18. I woke up at five today but the sun wasn't shining, it wasn't even sneaking out from behind the massive cloud cover, it was the first day in Forks when I wasn't greeted by soft warmth penetrating my room. I sat up in bed and threw the covers of off me. I tried to calm myself and prepare for today.

After my chat with Carlisle and Esme, he had phoned Sue to ask her if it all sounded okay. It did. Edward had not hassled me with questioned, he had waited while I had a shower and he had stayed in my bedroom with me for two hours before he went to his own.

Today I wanted to look like myself, not some beautiful creation of Alice's. I had to be me, but smart to pay my respects, I hadn't done so yet. Before I got dressed I had a good look through my trunk that Charlie had given me before I got dressed. I looked at the pictures he collected of me, the ones of how he used to remember me. I looked so small, so innocent, and not to mention careless; I used to run around in denim shorts and colourful t-shirts, I still looked really pale but there was a distinct brightness in my eyes which I'd missed. I started to cry lightly, missing the old me, the younger me. I wiped a few tears away and strolled towards my wardrobe, flinging it open to inspect it carefully.

About an hour later I had decided. I was wearing my Guns and Roses tee that he had given me; underneath I had a long black vest top. On top I had a long black cardigan, bottoms wise I decided on a pair of tattered blue denim shorts and some laced tights. I tied my hair up in a pony tail, just as it had been in the photos. When I looked at myself in the mirror, even though it sounds like a peculiar out fit, I felt like Charlie would recognise me.

I made my way slowly downstairs, walked to the kitchen and wandered to the fridge, today felt too much like any other day so far. Instead of milk I poured myself a glass of apple juice. The sun was still hidden. I sat down at the table sipping silently on my apple juice. It felt so different, the apple taste drowned my throat and it was sweet but cold, very cold. I tried to concentrate on the apple juice, studying the taste and comparing it to milk, instead of letting my mind wander off to the lack of sun and the overwhelming task that laid ahead of me today.

I had only finished half of my glass when Edward walked down, I didn't know that he was coming today.

"Hey Bella" he said quietly walking up to me slowly, he was dressed as he was coming today. He had on a white shirt, a thin black tie and some black jeans.

"Hey" I said almost inaudibly. He came and sat in the chair next to mine, he was about to ask me something when he noticed the lack of milk and the replacement of apple juice.

"Did we run out of milk?"

"No, you've got loads, I feel bad that you have to supply like twice the amount of milk you had before I arrived"

"Is that the reason you're not drinking it now? Because you know that we can afford as much milk as any of us need, you aren't putting us out Bella"

"No, yeah I know"

"Then why aren't you having milk?"

"Today felt too much like every other day" He stroked my leg gently as I spoke. He looked up to me caringly.

"Bella, look I'll come if you want me to. I can understand this is something you have to do on your own; I just wanted to be able to help you. I totally understand that I have never been through anything like this, but I want to be there for you. I don't want you to have to cope on your own, because you have me now." He rushed out he words very quickly; it was nearly difficult to understand him.

I stroked his cheek with my hand and smiled lightly. He looked full of panic,

"Please come with me Edward, I don't think I can do this on my own" I whispered. He pulled me into him gently, rubbing my back soothingly. I resisted the urge to start crying, I didn't want to start now, it was almost certain that I would later.

"Okay, so what do you want for breakfast?" he asked once he let me out of his hold, his hands were still gently holding my arms. I shrugged, I didn't feel that hungry but I knew that he wouldn't let me out of the house without food today.

"Hold on Edward, you can't cook"

"Oh, that's nice, thanks for the vote of confidence" he mocked as he strolled towards the cupboards. I laughed as he dramatically pulled out a cereal box.

"I think I can put deal with cereal" he continued, getting the milk from the fridge.

"Well I'm not so sure Edward, are you sure you can cope?" I mocked back; he was making this easier, clearing my mind.

"Hmm, enough of that from you; here it looks okay right? Oh was I meant to put the cereal in before or after the milk?" he mocked more as he placed a bowl in front of me.

"Oh dear Edward, you're not cooking again are you?" Esme chanted as she glided into the room. She came over to me and placed a soft kiss on the top of my head, and went over to Edward, kissed him on the cheek and leant over his shoulder inspecting the cereal mockingly.

"It's actually okay, I'm impressed" I complimented, smiling over to Edward.

"Yeah, just you wait, there is a super chef in the making"

"Um Edward I wouldn't go that far" Esme mocked from the cupboard.

"Well I am glad you wouldn't go far, I don't like it when you leave" Carlisle flattered as he walked up to Esme, giving her a tender kiss on the lips. He looked over and gave a short apologetic smile to me, Edward 'choked' on his cereal.

"You ready Bella?" Carlisle questioned. I didn't know the answer, well I guess I did, I was dressed and clean and presentable. But if I was ready to actually do this; I wasn't so sure.

"Bella?" Edward asked, I hadn't been aware that time was passing so quickly. I stood up, causing Edward to rise with me.

"I just need to get some things" I said whizzing up the stairs. I rushed into my room, to the trunk. I rummaged through to pick out a picture I could take with me. I found one of me on Charlie's shoulders, he had a giant grin on his face and I had a scared but entertained smile on mine. I looked so small against him, he looked big and brave.

I rushed back down the stairs, clutching the small picture in my hands; careful not to cringle or bend it.

"Edward and I will come with you Bella" Carlisle said when I reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Here, Bella please take these" Esme said passing me a large bouquet of flowers, white lilies, they were beautiful.

"Thank you Esme" I whispered as I was led to the car outside. Edward was by my side and touching the small of my back guiding me. I shuffled in the back seat, Edward took the seat next to me, I carefully placed the flowers in my lap, stroking them into place.

The ride to the cemetery was silent. I stared out the window, as we whizzed around Forks, the greens, browns, blues and greys of nature all mixed together. When we arrived Edward carefully reached out to gently stroke my hand.

"We are here Bella" my attention turned from the view from my window to the view out of his. I saw a huddle of cars on the opposite side of the road, surrounding them was a group of middle-aged people. In the midst of everyone I saw Sue, she was dressed in totally in black, but her smile beamed outwards, the memory of my father was running down her cheeks.

"I can't not yet, not, not until they are gone" I whispered, Edward nodded understandingly. Carlisle turned back to look at me quizzically, I couldn't stand his gaze so I turned back to look out of my window but I outstretched my hand to Edward, he quickly met my hand with his and I intertwined my fingers into his, gripping them nervously.

It was at least ten silent minutes until Carlisle announced that they had gone. I spent another five minutes preparing myself to get out the car. I breathed a big sigh before I swiftly got out of the car. Edward quickly followed me. I didn't know where I was going. I looked back to Carlisle who nodded at Edward, I moved my gaze quickly to Edward who nodded at me knowingly; "I know where to go Bella, don't worry" he ushered.

It didn't take us very long to get to his grave. I choked at the sight of it, it looked the same as everybody else's. I walked up closer to it and gasped as I could read the notation on the stone:

_Charlie Swan _

_Strong, loyal and brave_

_Beloved husband _

There was no mentioned of what a great father he was! It wasn't there, there was no evidence that I was even related to him, that he never fathered me; I fell to my knees and starting weeping onto the cold stone. Edward kept a safe distance; he knew I would call for him if I needed him.

I controlled myself and shuffled backwards, I cleared my face of tear stains. I placed the flowers against the cold stone and placed my picture beneath them.

"Pheww" I breathed.

"Okay, its okay, I can do this" I motivated myself. It wasn't working.

"Dad, it's me, your Bells, I'm back. I came back looking for you, but um you, fuck, um you were dead. And you still are, obviously. Dad, I can normally cope with words, look what you've done to me" I joked, and choked out a laugh between gushes of tears.

"Well Dad, I don't think I could stomach telling you why I had to come back. I've wanted to come back, ever since I left. I was so happy here Dad, and I am now. Well not right now but now in general. The Cullens Dad, they have taken me in. I was a real state before, I would still consider myself one now but I'm a better state. They are all so nice. I met your wife too, she seems brilliant. I was so happy to find out that you had found some one to help feed you" I laughed lightly again, knowing that he would have been chuckling too. It started to rain.

"I don't know Dad, it just feels wrong you not here with me. Every single morning I've been here I have blessed with the sun on my face. The freaking sun Dad! I lived in Phoenix for 18 years and the sun never touched me like it does here."

"I have been crying a lot recently, I feel so guilty. I feel that if I was here we would have been happy, everything would have been different. I feel like I let you die. Like my aging soul, my unhappy place made you die. I don't know how it would work. I've tried to be logical but it just doesn't make any sense"

"I have been so lonely, back in Phoenix I used to pray that something would bring me back to you. I needed you, I needed you so much. To protect me when the world was out to get me, you raised me well though, I'm strong, well kind of."

"I still wear that Gun's and Rose's tee, I wear it all the time, it still reminds me off you. I… Dad I want you back. Come back, please?"

"I miss you, so, so much" I couldn't see I was crying too much; the tears and rain were streaming around me. I looked up to see the dark grey clouds storm around me.

"You should have got me; I couldn't have left on my own. I didn't know how to contact you, I wasn't allowed to go near the phone. I couldn't get the post. I was all on my own. Mum wasn't there, she has died, I couldn't save her either. She wanted me to call Phil my Dad. But I wouldn't dad. I wouldn't, you will always be my Dad. I don't care that it isn't engraved into this shitty piece of stone. You were my Dad, I wish we could have grown together, we deserved to be together."

"Dad, I need you now, please, please. I would do anything, I mean I would sit with you every night and watch those boring sports that you love, I would even try to enjoy them. I would always do my homework, I would cook for you every night, we could go fishing together, I hate fishing dad, but I would do it for you. Please" The thunder boomed around me.

"Dad, I need you!" I screamed, "Why didn't you come to get me? Didn't you want to see me! Seven years Dad!"

"Seven years! Seven years I was alone and broken, I was beaten Dad, I was raped, Mum was doped up beyond believe, trying to escape, I couldn't escape Dad. I needed you to save me! Why didn't you come to get me?!" I screamed into the rain. In rage I punched the hard stone, again and again. Edward wrapped his arms around me pulling me back.

"NO, no, no. I'm sorry! Let me go. I'm sorry Dad! Let me go!" I screamed again, struggling against Edward's strong hold.

"LET ME GO!" he dropped me and fell backwards. I landed with a thump on my knees and crawled quickly towards where I was sitting. I hugged the headstone tightly.

"I'm sorry dad. I'm so sorry" I repeated over and over, I looked down at my hands around the headstone and they were bleeding badly but I didn't feel that pain. I heard Edward slump down to the ground.

"Dad, please come back" I whispered as I pulled back and picked up the small picture I had placed beneath the flowers. I looked back to Edward, tears unstoppable and streaming down my face. Edward was sitting knees up looking out to me, he was soaking wet and his face was crumpled with sympathy, fear and anger.

"I'm in love Dad, you should be here to tell me that I'm foolish to be in love when I'm this young. You should be telling me to concentrate on my school work. But you're not."

"Edward, I need you" I cried out to him. His head twitched up and he ran over to my crumpled form. He took me in his arms and held me tightly.

"I'll look after her forever Mr. Swan, forever and more"


	28. Chapter 28 Red

**EPOV**

I decided to stay behind, I was close enough so she could call me but I didn't want to interrupt or be nosey. I stood and watched as her shaking body rocked forward with her tears. The rain had started crashing down with booming thunder.

"Dad, I need you!" she screamed so loud over the thunder into the rain, "Why didn't you come to get me? Didn't you want to see me! Seven years Dad!" She was crying harder, she choked out her screams.

"Seven years! Seven years I was alone and broken, I was beaten Dad, I was raped, Mum was doped up beyond believe, trying to escape, I couldn't escape Dad. I needed you to save me! Why didn't you come to get me?!" She started punching the rock hard stone. She was going to really hurt herself; I ran to her; wrapped my arms tightly around her and pulled her up off the ground, her hands were dripping with blood.

As soon as I picked her up she started struggling against my strong hold.

"NO, no, no. I'm sorry! Let me go. I'm sorry Dad! Let me go!" she screamed, the rain beating down, I didn't want to let go, she would hurt herself again.

"LET ME GO!" she screamed once more, she didn't want me. I dropped her, I was going to put her down but she was struggling so hard; I had no choice. She fell to her knees and like it wasn't heart breaking enough to watch her soak her face in tears in, in her outfit which was drowned by the thundering rain, but to watch her crawl towards her father's headstone and wrap her weak arms around his headstone, I felt like I was about to cry myself, there was nothing I could do to help her.

I sat down, I was angry that Charlie had died it wasn't his fault but he made her so upset. I didn't want her to be upset, it hurt me so much. I wanted to carry her some where safe, where no body to touch her again. I she seemed to be calmer now, still so ridden with sadness.

She turned to look at me; her eyes filled with more tears, her face flooded with streams of tears. She quickly turned back and I turned my gaze away from her. The sight of her was so shattering, I wanted to rush over to her but I couldn't until she wanted me there; I had already intervened when I wasn't wanted.

She turned to me fractionally and called for me; "Edward I need you" she choked. I sprinted towards her, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer to me tightly, we were still sitting down, she was facing away from his headstone but I was facing it.

"I'll look after her forever Mr. Swan, forever and more" I whispered into her ear but talking to Charlie. I wanted to care for her, I wanted to save her. She pulled back, rubbing her tear stains from her eyes. She looked at me, her face still tear stained but now rubbed red.

"Hey, hey come on Bella" I whispered stroking her hair from her face.

"Edward, I miss him so much"

"I know, I know" I ushered pulling her back in a tight hug. We stayed there for ages, letting the rain soak us. She drowned my shoulder with her slowing tears. She was starting to shake, we were both freezing. Carlisle came up behinds us with a large umbrella.

"Guys, we should go" he had to shout over the thunder. I pulled her back, holding tightly onto her shoulders, I looked deeply in her eyes.

"You ready?" I whispered to her

"I think so"

"Come on" I said shuffling up, looking over to Carlisle who looked so sympathetic. Bella looked back at Charlie's grave. She grimaced and bent over to collect a small picture.

"Bella," I said quietly while I was at Carlisle's side. She was still standing by his grave.

"Bella you are going to freeze" I said again as she walked back towards me.

"I'm not cold" she said blatantly,

"Oh yes you are" I said hugging one arm around her shoulders as we were walking back to the car. She melted into my side.

"Oh Bella, your hands!" Carlisle remarked,

"I'm sorry, I just got a bit angry" Bella almost whispered.

"Oh Bella, it will be fine" Carlisle said lightly. We got to the car in silence again, we clambered in, soaking the whole car. After we started driving, "Do you still want to visit Sue?" Carlisle asked, looking at Bella through the rear view mirror. Bella looked up to me, her wide tired eyes were confused.

"Just quickly,"

……….

When Bella said quickly, she really meant quickly. She asked to stop off at a grocery store and got some more flowers then we got to, I don't know what to call it, her old house, Sue's house, but we got there in just over five minutes. She looked up at the small house and whimpered slightly, she gently stroked new tears away, you could tell that her face was stinging.

"I'll only be a minute but would you come with me Edward?" she said, not turning to me she was still looking at her old house. She outstretched a tiny shaking hand to me, I took it and knotted my fingers with hers.

"Of course Bella, whenever you are ready" I said lightly back, stroking circles onto her hand. She looked up to me and smiled weakly, her redness had faded, the tear stains were removed, her eyes were just shimmering over.

"Take as long as you want, I will wait here until you are done" Carlisle said turning to us. I nodded back at him. Bella took another look at the little house, sighed then started to get out of the car, I rushed out and met her and her hand on the other side. She quickly intertwined her fingers in mine and pulled on my arm, I nearly slammed into her but instead I regained composure and stood closely to her.

We reached the door and Bella stood outside staring intensely at the knocker for two minutes. I decided not to rush her, I just tried to make her feel safe and calm. She looked up to me for guidance and I nodded slowly. She raised her hand to grab the knocker but noticed how distinctly fucked up her hands were. She dropped it and looked at me again. I raised my own hand and tapped the knocker lightly.

We didn't wait long for a reply, Sue came rushing to the door and opened it. She dropped her mouth in shock, surprise, awe, I don't know we were soaking wet, Bella's hands were bleeding, I was carrying the flowers, so I don't think that there was much that wouldn't drop your jaw when two straggly teenagers walk up to your door.

"Oh Bella, please come in" she finally said.

"Oh no, it's okay thank you, I just came to give you these" she shook her head and signalled for me to pass the flowers to Sue. She took them with a weak smile.

"Bella, I insist, please come in, we have lots of food"

"I don't think so, maybe another time" Bella said politely, "Oh and this is Edward" she said pointing to me. Sue gasped at Bella's bleeding hand, but turned her attention to me.

"Well, hi there. I'm Sue." I didn't know what to say in reply, I opened my mouth and quickly closed it again. I outstretched my free hand, because Bella didn't want to let go of my other one and we shook hands politely.

"Did you visit your father today?" Sue turned her attention back to Bella. Bella's eyes started to water slowly.

"Yes I did" she said flatly. We stood there, thankful for the porch roof, in silence for a couple of minutes.

"I think we should go now" Bella suggested, looking to Sue then back up to me.

"Yeah" I nodded in response.

"Well, it was nice seeing you again" Sue said desperately as we started to make our way back to the car.

"Bye Sue" Bella said politely, a small weak smile creeping on her lips.

Bella hurried back into the car and dropped my hand, staring at her own. She balled them up and pressed them hard into her thighs. I jumped in the other side of the car and tried to grab her hands, she resisted.

"Come on Bella" I said once I had her little wrists in my big hands. She was frantically turning her head to the side, avoiding my eyes.

"Bella" I said sternly, it called her attention to me.

"I can not help you if you keep resisting my help. I want to help you, I want to try and help you. Let me" I said honestly.

She whimpered, unclenched her hands and hung her head. I pulled her gently to me and rested her on my lap. I nodded to my Dad in the rear view mirror, he started the car and I cradled Bella to my chest. We got home quickly, Bella was so sleepy I carried her silently inside. Carlisle had rushed inside first I heard him gather up the family and talk to them quickly;

"Bella is struggling today, be kind, be gentle, think what you would be going through in her shoes. Okay?" I heard a hummer of mumbled yes's and I strode slowly into the room, cradling Bella to my chest still.

"I'm going to take her upstairs, I'll have a quick shower, get dressed and run Bella a bath" they all nodded silently. Rosalie and Alice looked like they were about to cry. Emmett and Jasper looked so sad, sympathetic at the crumpled Bella in my arms. Esme was crying silently, Carlisle had a big arm around her.

It is rather astounding how much your foot-eye co-ordination improves when it is needed. I was able to zoom up the stairs while still holding Bella. I placed her lightly on her bed.

"Edward" she whispered as I was about to leave the room.

"Yeah" I whispered as I came back to her side, crouching at her bedside.

"I'm sorry about in the graveyard." She opened her eyes and flashed to mine, she looked so hurt.

"No, it's fine absolutely fine. I just wanted to help, I didn't know how to"

"Will you stop telling me that everything is fine, because do you know what fine stands for?"

"No?"

"Freaked out, insecure, neurotic, everyday, fine." She giggled lightly and I joined in. I stroked some stray hairs out of her face.

"Bella, I'm going to get in the shower and run you a bath. Get out of your wet clothes and get ready for a bath yeah? But stay warm" I instructed, she nodded sleepily. I ran out of her room and started to run the bath while I jumped in the shower. I couldn't relax fully but I could feel the warm water trickle down my body, soothing my cold muscles.

I hopped out of the shower, wrapped a towel around my waist, shut off the bath and sprinted out of the bathroom. I got dressed in some random comfy clothes and sprinted back to Bella's room.

"Bella?" I knocked on the door.

"Yeah?" she answered sleepily, I creeked open the door slowly, "You ready?" I continued, opening the door.

"Ready for what?" I saw her sitting up in bed fully dressed in the same soaking wet clothes she had been wearing before.

"Oh Bella, you were meant to get ready for the bath I've run you"

"I'm sorry Edward, I fell asleep I think" she mumbled, yawning like a kitten.

"Don't worry, come on now, get undressed and get ready yeah? I'll wait outside"

"No, I'm too tired" she mumbled again,

"Bella, I can't help you get undressed"

"Why not?" she teased, she was really tired.

I walked over to her slowly; I shuffled her legs out the side of the bed. She held up her bloody hands, trying to shrug off her cardigan.

"Oh Bella, we will have to sort those out" I said taking them in my hands. She shrugged. I started to slowly stroke of her cardigan; she shivered at the touch and closed her sleepy lids. I threw her cardigan away, it landed with a splash on the floor. I lifted the hem of her Guns' and Roses t-shirt,

"Sleepy Bella, you need to lift your arms" she complied with a slight moan, I lifted it slowly, I grazed the skin on her arms.

"No, you have to keep them up" I coached as she wanted to put her sleepy arms down. I pulled her vest top up quickly, revealing a soft pale stomach covered with goose bumps.

"Bella, you are going to have to stand up"

"No" she mumbled some more and groaned as she tried to lift herself, she failed. I swooped one arm under her arm wrapping round to hold her up.

"Okay, okay you're up but this is going to get tricky. Do you think you can stand?" she nodded lightly, she steadied herself before signalling for me to continue. I still held onto her arm because I let go and she wobbled. I reached a hand down and slid her shorts down over her lace covered legs; they didn't need pushing after I dragged them over her bum they fell to the floor.

"One foot up" I instructed and she complied sleepily; I removed that side of the shorts from beneath her foot. "And the other one" she lifted her foot and I slid the shorts across the room to the pile of wet clothes in the corner of her room. I reached down and rolled the top of her tights down, I let her sit back down and she landed with a light thump. She smiled sleepily as I rolled down her tights on both of her legs at the same time. I pulled the soaking wet tights off and chucked them to the growing pile. I looked down at her cold body and I reached over to get her dressing gown.

"Up you get Bella" she complied and stumbled a bit, I wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled the sleeves of the dressing gown onto her skinny arms. I removed my arm and wrapped the dressing gown tightly around her, she flopped against me and she started to giggle in her sleepy state. I picked her up and carried her into the bathroom.

I placed her down in front of the bath, holding her steady.

"You okay?" I asked, she was staring absently into the bubble filled bath.

"You're going to stay with me again?" she turned to me, her eyes surprisingly wide. I nodded and turned around so she could get out of her underwear and into the bath. I quickly ran out to get a chair and came back in to a bubble smothered Bella. She smiled softly as she saw me clambering around with my chair. When I reached the side of the bath she outstretched a small wet hand and I took hold of it, carefully washed off some dried blood and carefully kissed the back of her hand.

"Pass me your other one" she did as I asked, I did the same to this one; although her right was decently more battered than her left.

"Hold on, let me get you some bandages or something, we don't want it to get infected" she nodded slowly. I rushed to the cabinet, found some bandages and rushed back to her. She giggled as I nearly slid of my chair. I carefully wrapped the bandages around her fragile hands and held them.

"You know that wasn't the reason I outstretched my hand"

"Yeah, but it had to be done"

"I suppose, thank you again Edward"

"I would do anything for you Bella"


	29. Chapter 29 Groundwork

**BPOV**

Three weeks had passed since I had visited my Dad. Eventually everything got back to the strange sort of normal that it had been. Our group of friends seemed tighter than ever, they made me feel so welcome. I had painted two more canvases and given one to Alice and the other was hanging up in the house. Alice was ecstatic that I was being creative again.

Esme had hung up our frame of photos in the dining room. It really did look brilliant; all of us looked like a proper family. We had grown into a proper routine too; it made me feel safe for once. I would wake up, sometimes with or without Edward Esme and Carlisle had set some boundaries but other than that he would stay with me. I would go downstairs, get milk; when the rest came downstairs I would have breakfast with them. We would all go to school, I had English with Jasper and Alice, then I used my iPod to block out the drivel of the rest of the classes, Edward would collect me between every class, we would all eat lunch together and talk and laugh about the most pointless things, I would then have the most doss lesson of all – Biology, with a teacher that worships the ground that Edward and I walk on, we just sat there talking quietly or writing notes to one another not really paying attention but never not paying enough attention to get called up on it. Then gym, where I would get mocked for an hour by the lovely warm-hearted family that had taken me in.

I was currently sitting on the sofa in the living room on a Sunday evening, watching Emmett and Jasper go against Rosalie and Alice playing some Mario game. I wasn't actually sitting on the sofa; I was actually sitting on Edward. I had day-dreamed off into thinking about what a generally wonderful time that the Cullens had given me.

"Hey Bells" Emmett said loudly, when does he ever say anything at a normal volume?

"Yeah?" I responded, he had pulled me out of my life-montage since I had been here.

"Has Edward taken you on a date yet?" what a strange question, obviously because it was Emmett everybody's attention was turned to our out-of-the-blue conversation, I should of said 'out of the Emmett' conversation. But that would have been strange…

"No," I answered confused. I looked up to Edward, he was fuming and he was glaring at Emmett. Emmett smiled widely.

"You haven't taken her on a date yet?!" Alice squealed at Edward.

"Look, I really don't mind. I wouldn't have expected you to" I interjected, forcing Edward's face to look at me, he smiled lightly then went back to glaring at his siblings, Jasper was giggling with Emmett who was looking so mischievous. Alice was in awe that he hadn't.

"Oh babe, I would not put up with that if I were you" Rosalie commented, making me laugh a little but she 'glared' at me showing she was serious.

"Guys please stop!" Edward bellowed, because they had all started gossiping about it.

"Look it isn't like I didn't want to, I just didn't know if you would want to" he said to me sweetly, like no body else was there.

"Of course I would love to, but you don't need to"

"But I want to, if you want to?"

"Oh for Christ sake, just ask her out!" Emmett boomed, bringing Edward and I swiftly back into the room, not that we ever left the room sort of thing.

"Fine" Edward hissed at the family, signalling for silence. He turned to me, I had shuffled of off his lap. He took my healed hands in his and looked at me genuinely.

"Bella, would you please come to dinner with me on Friday night?"

"Of course"

……….

Thursday; Rosalie and Alice decided that I didn't need to go to school today. They kept me at home while the boys went to school.

"Hey, how come I can't go to school today?"

"Well Bella, you have a very important event tomorrow" Alice teased

"I do?"

"Bella! Of course you do!" Rosalie started, shocked I didn't know, but I was still confused.

"Your _first _date with Edward!" Alice continued equally as shocked.

"Oh, so I take it that we are going shopping?"

"Hell yeah!" they squealed in unison, they rushed me out into Rosalie's car.

On the way there we were belting out random songs whenever we recognised them, it intrigued me to see just how much more free spirited I was now. I found out that instead of walking around Forks minimal shops we were going to Port Angeles. It didn't take us too long to get there, but along the drive I was taking pictures of us and the surroundings that were whizzing by.

We got there and I was dragged to the mall,

"Okay are you ready for this Bella?" Alice questioned standing outside a mall.

"Um yes?"

……..

We had been shopping for the whole day; it had been rather leisurely compared to my last frantic shopping trip with them before I had begun school, woah that was a long time ago… Anyway we were stopping into shop after shop and were looking at dresses.

At first I was like aren't dresses a teeny weenie bit snazzy for a first date, they argued that we had been together for nearly a month, which was also bizarre, that this date should be snazzy and wonderful.

We had been in hundreds of shops I felt, trying on dress after dress; finally I caught a stunning dress in the corner of my eye.

"Alice?" I called, nor nearing it, still just in awe from the sight of it.

"Yes my darling Bella?" she skipped over to me, I pointed in the direction of the beautiful creation.

"Oh my god! Rose get over here!" Rose quickly neared us, Alice and I both pointed in unison. Rosalie gasped in awe.

"Ladies, we have lift off!" Alice and I stared at Rosalie in confusion.

"Okay, you are officially spending too much time with Emmett; he is seriously messing with your brain!" I perked up, she tut-ed me and walked towards the dress. She picked up the hanger and handed it over to me. I held it up to my body, turned to see the mirror; Rosalie and Alice gasped simultaneously.

And then I did something I never thought that I would hear out of my mouth, I squealed. I full on squealed; I placed the dress to the side before beckoning Alice and Rosalie who joined in the squeal of excitement and wonderment, we hugged and jumped up and down, it was weird and lame upon reflection but I had found the most amazing dress ever.

We decided that I didn't even need to try it on, we made sure it was in my size and then brought it. They hid my eyes and ears when they were paying for it, they said I was 'better off not knowing'. We called home saying that we were going to go out for a 'special girl dinner' and would be back later.

**EPOV**

"Special girl dinner" pfft… I only saw Bella for like two minutes this morning; it was painful and strange not going to collect her after every class. Anyway, I knew that they were shopping for; they were shopping for an outfit for Bella for tomorrow. I knew that she would look stunning whatever she wore, I'm such a good boyfriend, not being bigheaded or anything, I never hear Jasper or Emmett saying things like that!

Well not all was bad, we did have a proper 'lads' night, we enrolled a serious amount of gaming, my hand was about to lock up, we ended up manly wrestling and eventually we had some proper 'man' food which meant fried chicken and pizza and then some manly beer. Carlisle decided to treat us, suggesting that the girls had probably done the same.

They finally came in as I had beaten Emmett for the third time! I rule! They came in and as a complete contrast to how Bella had looked once she last finished shopping. Her face was beaming with excitement and her cheeks were rosy with entertainment.

Bella glided over to me, plumped down onto the sofa and placed her bag to the far side of the sofa.

"Hey Edward" she whispered as she crawled up to me. She wrapped her hands around my arms. I pulled her onto my lap and twisted her around.

"Hey Bella" I whispered into her neck, she shivered and nestled her head into the cave of my neck.

"Bed time?" Bella whimpered lightly. Her voice bounced of off my neck and sent shivers running through my body. I nodded and picked her up, I skipped up the stairs and into her room, I was already ready for bed so I skipped back downstairs while she got ready for bed to collect her shopping.

"EDWARD!" Alice screeched at me as I bent down to pick up the bags.

"What?" I defended, but straightened straight away.

"What do you think you are doing?" Rosalie quizzed, flanking Alice

"I was just taking Bella's shopping to her room?"

"No you don't, this is for us" Alice quirked.

"But"

"Edward, no take-y!" Rosalie interrupted and patronised me, well done Rosalie. I obliged and scuttled up the stairs to go back to Bella. I knocked lightly on the door.

"You ready?" I asked creaking open the door.

"Yep" she answered cheerily. I opened the door fully, stood in the doorway looking on to a p-jama-ed Bella. She was standing absentmindedly at the end of her room, out-looking with the moonlight bouncing through the window and of off her body. She had a small plain white cotton t-shirt and small grey cotton shorts.

I walked up to her; she smiled as she recognised my reflection. I wrapped my arms around her waist, she turned around in my arms and wrapped her own arms my neck. She smiled widely and tiptoed to reach my lips; she kissed me lightly and ran her own tongue along my bottom lip. I pulled her up, and she wrapped her bare legs tightly around my waist. She moaned against the kiss as I moved a hand on her bum to support her. She threw her small body closer to mine and tangled her hands into my hair.

When we finally broke for air she smiled devilishly.

"I missed you today" I said walking her over to her bed.

"I missed you too Edward," she replied. I tried to put her down but she wouldn't let her legs go.

"Bella, you can't get to sleep while your attached to me like this"

"Yeah I can"

"Fine, you might be able but I wouldn't be able to" I argued

"Can't you just stay with me a bit?" she pleaded

"Yes I can" She let go off my waist and dangled her legs, she slowly let go off my neck and hair too. She lifted the sheets and crawled into bed, waving for me to enter after her. I entered, pulling her into my chest.

"Did you have fun at least today?" I questioned, curious to know more about her trip.

"Yeah, I had lots and lots of fun. All of which you aren't going to know about" she quirked

"I'm sorry that isn't what I meant. I'm glad you had fun though."

"Hmm"

"You sleepy"

"Yes very" she mumbled,

"Okay then, goodnight Bella"

"Love you Edward" she whispered leaning back to let her lips graze my neck.

"I love you too Bella"

…….

**BPOV**

The night came and went quickly. I dreamed peacefully, as I always did with Edward holding me. The sun rose early today, I looked over to my clock, it was half five. I turned back over and Edward was sleeping peacefully. I wiggled myself closer to him; I rested my head on his chest and listened to his sleepy heartbeat.

He started to mumble some incoherent mumblings and I turned my head on his chest to look up at him. He was flickering his eyes open.

"Morning Edward"

"Hmm mormen Bella" he mumbled groggily

"What was that Edward?" I mocked, crawling up his chest so I was much closer to his head.

"I said good morning my beautiful Bella"

"I didn't get that"

"Hmm, that is very strange, because I spoke so clearly"

"I must be going deaf then"

"Yeah probably" he mocked; I leant forward to place a delicate kiss on his soft lips. He groaned when I pulled away.

"Edward I need to get dressed, we have school today"

"No, no" he argued

"Shh, right, you scat I'm changing" I said shuffling out of my duvet and strolled towards the wardrobe. He still hadn't moved. I turned and gave him a 'you have to leave or die' playful look and he threw the covers off and stropped out of the room childishly.

I was finding that it was getting more and more difficult to decide what to wear, I don't know why that was but it was. I had eventually decided on my favourite jeans and a black-wash out vest top and a white lace top. I seem a bit obsessed with lace, I think that it is pretty.

I skipped down the stairs and into the kitchen where a very impatient; he was sitting down at the table a glass of milk waiting for me. He was wearing a pair of jeans, a white cotton t-shirt and a dark grey zipped hoodie, yum. His head twitched towards me as I stalked slowly towards him.

"Look what they have done to you" he sulked, throwing his arms across his chest.

"Hey, I dressed myself this morning. Don't I look nice?" I teased

"No of course you do, you look beautiful" he said pulling on my waist and hugging me tightly.

"But…?" I coached

"But, why did it take you so long to get dressed?"

"I don't know, but I wasn't that long was I?"

"You were at least 7 minutes"

"Oh really?"

"Yep, now drink you're milk I'm going to get some toast for us"

"Toast? My word don't you think you are pushing your culinary skills?" I mocked

"Oh ha ha" he continued while getting up, I sat down in the chair next to his. I started to silently slurp on milk, admiring the beautiful man that I was lucky enough to call my boyfriend, my best friend and my protector.

………

**EPOV**

To say the least I was nervous about tonight. I mean yes it was only a date, well only doesn't come into it. It was our _first _date and yes it had taken me nearly a month to take her on a date. Secondly it was _our _first date. Our being beautiful Bella and myself; Bella being the most fantastic girl in the whole of everywhere.

Alice and Rosalie dragged me out of school at lunch, which I was glad because it would take much longer than just an afternoon afterschool for what I had planned. We zoomed home, we rushed in and around the house, I collected the furniture, Alice got the decorations and Rosalie started in the kitchen.

We travelled several times to and from our destination, it was starting to look pretty good. When Emmett, Jasper and Bella came home Rosalie and Alice had whisked Bella upstairs, Bella never saw me I didn't see her either – I was seriously missing her but what must be done, has to be done, I guess.

I had to sneakily enter the house without being noticed. I was told that an outfit had been selected for me, I decided not to argue with her. I walked towards the bed where she had laid out for me. There was a single button blue blazer, a white shirt, a very thin blue tie the same colour as the blazer and a very nice pair of faded, but without holes, jeans.

I sneaked back out of the house, and made my way to the meadow.


	30. Chapter 30 Date

**BPOV**

"Bella stop fidgeting" Rosalie instructed, pulling on my hair while brushing it.

"I'm sorry, I'll stop" I begged

"Damn right you'll stop" She mocked, tapping me lightly on the head with the brush.

I had been rushed upstairs as soon as I came home. Rosalie and Alice made me strip off minus underwear and sit on a very comfortable stool (yes sarcasm) in a very thin dressing gown. I had been pruned, plucked and many other verbs that described the torture that I had suffered for about three decades, or maybe just three hours. Apparently, I only had an hour left; I felt butterflies fly around my stomach, good pretty butterflies but all the same.

"Right we have just about done" Alice squeaked, pulling back to look at me quizzically.

"Oh Alice we have truly out down ourselves this time" Rosalie complimented, looking at me also.

"I think I agree with you Rose, aka my partner in beauty"

"Guy's can I look at myself yet?"

"No" Rosalie said sternly

"Did you get my 'partner in beauty' joke?" Alice whined

"Yes Alice it was very clever" I commented, trying to get some credit to look at myself.

"Bella no matter what you say you can't look at yourself yet"

"Crap" I uttered to myself.

"Oh the potty mouth on her" Alice said with a strange posh accent

"She will never get to see herself with words like that" Rosalie mocked in the same mimicked accent, I just laughed at them and waited it out.

Ten whole minutes later they officially declared that they were done playing with me;

"Bella, thank you for your lack of resistance" Rosalie commented

"Even though it would have been futile" Alice quickly added in before Rosalie continued

"You have just participated in what we like to call 'Barbie Bella'" they both clapped in joy once Rosalie finished.

"Does that mean I can look at myself yet?" I questioned eagerly

"Well, unless you intend in going to dinner in your underwear then no"

"The dress?" I asked hopefully

"Yes!" They squealed in unison, I then proceeded to jump up and down in my seat.

Alice rushed over to her wardrobe and pulled out the beauty. I squealed some more and Rosalie put her tender hands onto my shoulders, relaxing me. She stood me up and I shuffled off the thin dressing gown, and waited for my dress.

"What about my bra straps?" I questioned panic ridden through my voice

"Oh silly, silly Bella" Alice mocked, revealing from behind the dress a strapless bra the same colour as the dress.

"Ah, of course" I uttered, duh, I thought to myself.

"Now darling, would you please get it on!" Rosalie instructed, I quickly turned and shuffled on the bra. I turned back around to receive my dress, they unzipped it and slid it on top of me, carefully avoiding my curled hair. It fit perfectly and Alice zipped me up while Rosalie looked on at the side in awe.

"Oh Bella, you look fabulous" Rosalie gasped,

"Bella! You are gorgeous!" Alice squealed.

"What am I wearing shoe wise?" I asked cautiously

"Well, that um you are wearing some plimsolls" Alice said her voice full of grimace, her face fell,

"Plimsolls? Seriously? I mean I know that I am not one for heels but plimsolls"

"Oh Bella, you'll make me cry, please just trust me" Alice whimpered passing a perfectly white pair of tidy plimsolls.

"Sorry Alice" I said, outreaching a sympathetic hand to her shoulders.

"I think I can cope" she whimpered again. I bent down to slip on the plimsolls, they were cute but still.

"Okay, okay I am finally ready, may I see now?" They both didn't answer they just ran towards covered mirror.

"Come on, stand in front of it" I obliged quickly and breathed slowly, and waited for the reveal.

"Guys! No fair you get to see and I don't" they had been distracted and were discussing my outfit with each other.

"Okay," Alice breathed, then looked at Rosalie. They both grabbed a corner of the material

"1, 2, 3!"

………

**EPOV**

Okay, I am getting proper, proper nervous now. I had been waiting here for ages now, hoping that the food wasn't going to get cold. Alice had phoned me about ten minutes ago telling us that they were leaving the house. Poor Bella, I had heard that they had blindfolded her.

There they were, Rosalie had sprinted in front of them to signal me to stand up. I complied and her smile beamed brightly. Alice had stopped Bella and Rosalie was standing in front of her, they were at the very edge of the meadow. They all shuffled forward, still not revealing Bella and not letting her see what we had created for her.

Rosalie took a dramatic step to the side to reveal the most beautiful creature I have ever, ever, ever, like full on ever seen. Bella was wearing a gorgeous dress, okay words may not be able to describe it; I shall try. It was a deep blue, it was strapless and it curved around her breasts, it had a black piece of ribbon under and around her chest. It was completely ruffled and in a torn sort of way, it was short, lovely and short. There was many different layers and sizes of material as the bottom half of the dress. The colour made her skin look so beautiful, it radiated of off her pale skin, her legs were so long and beautiful. Her arms were long and held out to the side, trying to feel her way around but too scared to actually move. She just looked stunning.

**BPOV**

Okay, so they had been dragging me through some where. I was blindfolded. Yeah, they blindfolded the one who can barely walk with full sight. So Alice and Rosalie had strong hold onto my arms to stop me falling over. I didn't know how long I'd been walking but it felt like forever.

I was stopped.

"Alice? Rosalie?"

"Shhh" well then. I decided to shut it until I was given permission to speak. This was like a beauty military campaign. I started moving again and the light changed, I could tell because it was slightly beaming through my blindfold. And then they let go, they let go! Well I gathered that we were here but still.

"Guys?" I whispered after a long silence. No answer… A little tug pulled on the back of my blindfold. Then I saw. Our meadow, our beautiful meadow, just more beautiful. It was littered and covered in fairy lights; fairy lights ran up and down all of the surrounding trees. There was a small fire burning to the side of a table covered with a white table cloth. There were intricate garden chairs on either side of the table. There were candles short and tall on the table, there was cutlery and everything! On another short smaller table there was an iPod and iPod dock playing softly in the background.

Then I saw Edward. My lovely, gorgeous, perfect Edward he was wearing a tight blue blazer, a muscle gripping white shirt, a very thin blue tie and a gorgeous pair of faded dark blue jeans. He strolled up to me and stood a couple of feet away from me.

"It is gorgeous Edward"

"Are you kidding? This is nothing compared to you. You look stunning" Edward said kindly; making me blush.

"You look just as stunning" I complimented, walking towards him. He met me in the middle and wrapped his long arms around my waist.

"Well, before it gets messy we are going to take our leave" Alice chirped from behind me.

"Thank you both so much" I wiggled out of Edwards hold and went to grab them in a group hug; they were careful not to touch my dress or make-up.

"Anytime" they chimed together before skipping off into the forest.

"Well Bella, we do have dinner" he said and I turned, he wrapped his arms back around my waist and I wrapped mine around his neck.

"Seriously, out here?" I questioned, because that would be extremely impressive, he nodded and led me in the direction of the table. He even pulled out my chair and waited until I sat down and then he pushed me into the table!

"Edward, you still amaze me"

"Well I am glad"

"Me too,"

"Prepare yourself, I'm hopefully about to do so again"

………

**EPOV**

Bella was truly amazed by the food that the lovely Rosalie and Alice had created. It was impressive that the food was still warm but I think that she was more impressed by the quality, it looked really posh. Once we had finished the main course I pulled out desert.

"Crème Brulee?"

"Yes Bella,"

"Now that is amazing" she said astounded, she greedily started eating hers and I laughed at her excitement and started on mine, somehow I still finished before her. I looked to her quizzically and my look caught her eyes.

"What?" she asked with a curious smile

"I finished before you"

"Well, you are bigger than me Edward"

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Um yep" she giggled childishly, I laughed.

"But I thought you were eating really quickly, my point being"

"Nu-uh, I started to eat it quickly but then I decided that I wanted to savour everything about tonight" she stated, and my heart grew as did my smile.

"Carry on then" I coached as I watched her nibble and slowly eat her crème brulee, it was part painful and part wonderful.

She finished with a satisfied 'ahh' and beamed at me.

"This has been so wonderful Edward"

"Well, I do feel guilty about not doing it sooner"

"Don't be stupid. There has been too much going on Edward, any way tonight is beautiful" she stood up and walked over to me in her wonderful dress, my eyes greedily taking in all that could be seen and she came over and sat on my lap. I welcomed her.

"I tell you one bad thing about how fabulous this night is going to be/has been" I stated stroking my beautiful Bella's bare back, she smiled and wrapped her arms loosely around my neck.

"What is that then?" she questioned innocently,

"Well, in a week it is going to be our one month anniversary and I don't think I will be able to do better than this one" I said rather smugly, she was leaning closer to my lips.

"Then we will just have to ruin this one some how" She teased, inching my lips towards her.

"How are we going to do that then?" I questioned against her lips.

"Hmm, well kissing you is horrible" she mocked

"Yeah I've found that too" I played along, a cheeky crooked smile that seemed to make her almost fall against my lips until she controlled herself.

"Then kissing would definetly ruin this evening, we should do that. You know for the greater good?"

"Yeah I agree" I finished pushing my lips against hers. Her lips melted against mine and she pushed herself against me. She shuffled in my lap, clearly a bit uncomfortable; I rustled her around so she could loosely wrap her legs around me. She pushed herself closer to me, I wrapped one arm around her waist, holding her tight to me, my other hand was stroking one of her silky smooth legs. She leaned even closer to me as my hand reached the hem of her dress. That was one lean to far, the chair toppled over.

We erupted in laughter and she giggled profusely. I rolled us awkwardly of off the chair and rolled onto the cleverly pre-placed rug. Her giggled slowly crawled to a halt and she looked me shyly in the eyes, she was now on top of me.

"You do look so beautiful" I said honestly, she did, the fairy lights twinkling around her with the green of the trees bouncing around the meadow, her beautiful eyes were praying onto mine. It was absolutely stunning, I slowly moved a strand of hair dangling in front of her face and placed it behind her ear. She folded her head into my hand and smiled back at me.

Instead of commenting back, she ravished my lips with hers, tangling her hands in my hair. I pulled her upwards so I could gage more of her wonderful mouth. I 'accidently' left my hand on the back of her leg, that sounds pervy but the noises she were producing were delicious. She ran one of her delicate hands down my chest and tracing my muscles, making me shiver throughout my body.

Then, I felt a trickle of water. No.

"No, no, I don't want it to rain" Bella moaned, as she released my mouth and looked up towards the sky.

"Looks like mother nature wanted to ruin tonight for us" I whined as I sat both of us up. She wiggled so she was a bit more comfortable on my lap.

"Well, I think that it was because I lied earlier" she whispered, leaning closer towards my lips again.

"What did you lie about Bella?" I whispered back against her lips.

"That kissing you was horrible, I don't think I fooled anybody" she 'sulked'.

"You were lying? Jeez, this is awkward I was telling the truth" I gave an 'awkward, jeez get me out of here' face and erupted in laughter as Bella 'clouted' me on the arm and looked very adorably offended.

"Bella, you know I'm kidding, come here" she only sulked more and crossed her arms. It was still only raining lightly, we could stay a little longer.

"Bella aren't you going to talk to me?" I whispered against her neck. She turned her head to the side childishly. I placed gentle fiery kisses against her neckline and along her collar bone. She moaned lightly as I placed light kisses further down her chest, she whimpered as I reached the dip in her dress.

I was suddenly interrupted by a random outburst of rain,

"Bella, I love you and would stay here together forever but you have been much to exposed to the elements of late"

"Lets go then Edward" she said getting up off me. I sat there dumb-founded.

"You don't love me then?" I sulked,

"Haha, that is what you get Edward" I continued to sulk and she walked closer to me and crouched down to face me.

"Of course I love you silly"


	31. Chapter 31 Night

**BPOV**

We kissed lightly once more before the rain started harder. Edward muttered grumpily to himself as I waited for him at the edge of the meadow, shivering. He was right I was going to end up without limps due to the constant amount of rain I'm normally under attack from. Edward had just reached my side and wrapped one arm around my back and started leaning us back home.

"Edward, what about the stuff?" I said shakily, looking back at the beautiful meadow, grimace covering my face.

"Don't worry, it will be fine it is only water" Edward said calmly, pushing me gently forward,

"Well if it is only water then why are we leaving?"

"Because my darling Bella, you are shivering"

"No I'm not" I said with shaky lips. I turned to look at him to convince him with a convincing smile, he in return gave me a 'now way you can convince me with blue lips' look. He reached out and lightly grazed my bottom lip with his thumb.

"Here have this" Edward muttered taking off his blazer.

"Oh no Edward, you'll freeze!" I declared, scurrying away from him, but like I was ever going to escape him? Not that I ever wanted to. But still, he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me closer to him, he had already taken his blazer off.

"I'm not going to wear it, I could just leave it here if you don't want it"

"Edward, you are so stubborn" I said resting my hands against his chest, "And really cold" I finished, hugging him tighter so he would warm up.

"Right, you are a hypocrite," I nearly interrupted him but he covered my mouth with his hand, "First of all, _you _in fact are the most stubborn person I have ever met, secondly _you _are freezing!" he removed his hand from my mouth and I shut my mouth tight, rather dumbfounded. Apparently the idiot goes well with rain, Edward pulled me upwards and kissed me heavily on the lips. I wrapped my bare legs around him, I could feel one of his arms around my waist but the other was missing.

There it was, wrapping his blazer over my shoulders. He pulled away and smiled very widely and smugly.

"You think you are so clever" I commented, struggling very much to get my arms into his blazer without letting my legs go of him. I never want to let go off him.

"Do I have any other reason to think other wise?" he commented smugly a giant smug grin matching his smug tone. I had finally gotten my arms into the blazer when I replied;

"Well you did say that you loved me"

"How is that not a clever thing to do?"

"It means that you have to stick this out for longer" I finished and he looked offended.

"Bella, I'm not sticking out anything."

"No, I mean I didn't" he interrupted me quickly,

"No Bella, listen to me; it wouldn't matter if I told you or not Bella. I have loved you for so long, I would never stop loving you okay? Get that into your beautiful head, I love you and I wish to continue until you tell me to stop, please don't think otherwise" he stroked my face lightly; small tears were slowly running down my cheeks. He lightly pressed his lips against mine, looked me deeply in the eyes.

"Do you believe me?" he questioned quietly, I nodded about to overflow with tears, happy tears.

"Edward, I am so in love with you. I don't want you to leave me ever, ever, ever, ever, ever. Sound good?" I said, honesty running down my cheeks. He laughed and I choked out a laugh.

"Sound's like a plan" he said with humour and honesty.

"Batman" I responded absentmindedly as I flopped my head against his shoulder, he started to carefully walk us through the forest with me still in his arms.

"What was that Bella?" he quizzed after a while, picking up pace slightly and he gripped me tighter. I pulled my heavy head up to look at the concentration on his face

"You said 'sounds like a plan' and I said Batman so it goes 'good plan Batman. It's just something people say because it kind of rhymes I guess" and then he chuckled, I giggled along.

"So does that back you Bat-girl?" he asked foolishly,

"Oh Edward, do you know nothing about Batman?" I asked blatantly, he looked very confused.

"No?" he answered confused,

"Bat-girl is at least 5 years younger than Batman; Bat-girl would get it together with Robin not Batman. It just doesn't work that way, Bat-girl and Robin are like students, Batman is teaching them about the lines of good and evil. And that is even if you think that Bat-girl exists, it depends what text or script you are going by. Edward you have much to learn. I think that I should be Batman, because you clearly know nothing and you should be Robin, it would suit you" I ranted off, he looked at me half quizzically and half astounded, his jaw dropped open and I shut it shut with one of my fingers.

"How on earth do you know _that _much about Batman?" he questioned, shuffling a quick look to me before looking back down at the ground, we were getting close to the house because there was a far out glow of warmth and comfort.

"I don't know I guess I spent a lot of time back in doors back in Phoenix, I mean it wasn't like I was allowed out so I just used to watch re-run after re-run and I used to read and read that is also why I happen to be without being big headed, rather knowledgeable. So I guess I can thank them for being so terrible" I ranted again, he looked horrified.

"Bella, don't you ever thank him for anything. He deserves nothing." He said angrily, I was taken back and silenced. I just mumbled a sorry and dug my head back into his large shoulder.

"Don't be sorry Bella, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten so angry" he apologised quietly

"No, no it is okay. I didn't mean to say it"

"I know Bella" he slowly placed me down and I realised that we were standing just to the side of the house.

"Hmm, Bella did I tell you just how amazing you look tonight?" I blushed and hid my face to the side.

"Speak for yourself, you look fantastic my beautiful boyfriend" I stated, surprisingly bringing more confidence as I walked closer to him. He wrapped his long arms around my waist, one hand falling to the small of my back, but his fingers trailed lower lightly.

"Can I tell you one more time?" Edward asked

"Tell me what?" I asked confused.

"Just how much I love you" he whispered against my lips.

"Hmm, yes you may. As long as I can say it return" I whispered back,

"You may my lovely, beautiful, perfect Bella" he whispered again.

"Then I love you more than I love milk" I whispered, he cackled lightly and I joined in. I abruptly ended the laughter when I couldn't resist anymore; I smacked my lips against his and he responded quickly.

"I'm not coming out because I am sure I do not want to see what is going on, please come inside" Esme yelled from the kitchen door. Edward grumbled when I pulled away but we were still so close that our lips were almost touching.

"We'd better, you are going to freeze" I whispered against him, he smiled and led the way in. Esme was standing arms crossed impatiently at the kitchen counters, but her mouth dropped open 'slightly' when we walked in.

"Alice?" Esme bellowed, Alice skipped in from the living room, with a big bright smile on her little face.

"Please, please tell me that you got pictures of them when they weren't soaking wet?" Esme continued, I quickly turned my attention to Alice. She nodded wickedly and pulled out my camera from behind her back

"Of course I did mother" she chirped as she skipped back out of the room.

"Oh darlings, please get out of those beautiful wet clothes" Esme chanted and ushered us out of the room.

"Thinking about it…" I said shyly, he twisted around and wrapped his arms around me.

"Thinking about what?" he whispered into my neck.

"Thinking about getting a room!" Emmett shouted from the sofa, they all proceeded to laugh manically. I blushed furiously and dug my head into his chest. He quickly lifted me up and rushed me up the stairs, as he reached the top he turned around and flashed a wicked, playful 'V' at the family below, only making them snigger more.

He continued to carry me to my room and gently placed me down on my bed. I was sitting on the side of the bed and he sat beside me.

"So, what were you thinking?" he quizzed, turning me to face him.

"Doesn't matter now" I muttered,

"It doesn't?" he asked pulling me onto his lap, I wrapped my arms lightly around his neck.

"Nope," I knew he wouldn't drop it so I decided to kiss him, the things I have to do eh? I swivelled my legs around so they were loosely wrapped around him, he pulled me closer wrapping his arms tightly around my back and waist. I let go of his mouth and trailed little kisses as far down his neck as I could go, his stupid lovely suit getting very much in the way.

I wriggled one hand down to the collar on his shirt as I moved my lips back up his. He removed my hand from his collar but he never removed his lips from mine. I groaned lightly but he pushed us back so I was lying on my back and he was hovering above me. He then trailed kisses all the way down to the top of my beautiful dress, he lips left electric sensations all over my skin. Then he chuckled,

"What?" I questioned quickly, impatient to get his lips back to mine or contact with my body.

"I just figured we did actually get a room like Emmett told us too" he said between lowering laughter.

"Hmm, I have to get ready for bed I'm sleepy now" I mumbled, he chuckled lightly again before rolling of off me. I shuffled up and kicked my shoes off before wandering to the wardrobe. I slid of my dress and carefully let it fall to the floor, I picked it up to put it neatly on a hanger even though it was soaking wet it would never deserve to be put on the floor.

I turned around; Edward was still sitting on my bed, looking at me with a emotion that I couldn't describe. He suddenly lurched up towards me, he wrapped his arms quickly around my waist and pulled me up, I wrapped my now much barer legs around him. Edward took the hanger from my hands and placed it carefully on top of the mirror to the side of us. Every single detail what happened from then on was lost from memory in a lust-filled, uncontrollable and passionate haze.

…….

**EPOV**

Um; words are not enough to describe what happened, we categorically did not have sex. I woke up next to a 'three quarters naked' Bella. Well in actual fact I woke up with a 'three quarters naked' Bella half on top of me. I myself was in a half naked state, I had sprinted up to my room to grab some comfortable trousers in the night because I was freezing and I had mad sure that Bella was not going to get cold, so I gave her the covers, and now my bare chest was covered by my beautiful Bella.

To add to the list of how amazing the past 24 had been, I have now woken up before Bella! Her breathing was slow and steady, her chest rose and fell regularly, and yes I admit I was watching. I'm allowed. She loved the meadow, and the date, and me. I couldn't imagine my life without her now, I wouldn't even want to. I carefully lifted my head, not to wake Bella, so I could gloat when she eventually woke up.

"It's three past six Edward" she mumbled,

"What?" I remarked, looking over to the clock, and then quickly down to Bella.

"Okay, well now it is four past six" she said smugly as she rolled over on my chest so she was facing me.

"Are you kidding?"

"No, look you can check?" she pointed innocently and confused to the clock.

"No, I trust that it is actually four past six. I thought you were asleep?"

"Um I was about an hour ago" her big eyes were wide, beaming confusion.

"For crap sake, I thought I had finally woken up before you" I mumbled, sulking slightly.

"I'm sorry Edward, I'll try to sleep for longer" she wiggled her way further up my chest so her head was hovering over mine.

"But you looked so peaceful, I actually thought you were asleep" I moaned, stroking her face lightly, her hair was gorgeously wild.

"Hmm, it's a skill you will come to learn young Robin" she mocked, outreaching her lips for mine before I could retort. I decided against breaking our beautiful kiss for a petty argument that I wouldn't win.

She crawled up my body more so her knees were supporting herself over my waist, I wrapped my arms around her pulling her against my chest. She pulled herself up slightly so she could run her hands down my waist.

"Ahhh," I warned when she reached the line of my trousers. She pulled back immediately and looked embarrassed and slightly offended.

"What? Sorry, I thought, I don't know, I'm sorry, sorry" she mumbled furiously as her face brightened.

"No, Bella it isn't that, believe me. Just if we start now, at seven past six in the morning I would not want to leave and if we don't come out all day then my family might get a little suspicious, don't you think?" She nodded, moaned and rolled of off me and the bed, she fell onto the floor with a loud thump and started cackling to herself.

"Shit, Bella are you okay?" I scrambled of off the bed to her cackling form.

"Haha, yes! I'm fine" I started laughing with her before she interrupted me by grabbing me by my neck and kissing me very passionately, she crawled her legs around me and I pulled her closer to me. Her hands scaled up and down my back. She gasped when my I placed my hand on her stomach, she coached my hand upward with a hand of hers that wasn't grasping my back and chest, for once, I'm not complaining, at all.

"HOLY CRAP!" I jumped up from underneath Bella, and looked towards a very shocked and disturbed looking Alice.

"HOLY SHIT!" Rosalie shouted from behind Alice.

"HOLY MOTHER!" Jasper bellowed afterwards. Bella had jumped up and was cowering behind me.

"Oh damn, this is gonna be fun" Emmett chuckled to himself. Crap, shit… Mum? Esme was standing behind them, absolutely fuming.

"Shit"

**Sorry it took forever to for me to update xxx**


	32. Chapter 32 Gossip

**BPOV**

Kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me now? I was still cowering behind Edward, come on I was basically naked or three quarters naked which is the preferred reference to my naked state, not that I was complaining I mean I loved what happened last night and it wouldn't have really worked if I wasn't as naked as I was but still this was ridiculous. Why where they here? Ah, what do I do? Shit. Shit. Apparently Edward was as confused as what to do as I was.

"Mum, mum look, just don't. Please?" Shit! Esme was here, what the hell was she going to think? Well I could kind of tell, please, please don't kick me out.

"Mum, come on, please um Mum?" I still hadn't peeked out from behind; I was 'three quarters naked'. Esme still wasn't speaking.

"I'm not sure what to say." Esme said softly,

"Oh come on, the door was closed!" Edward defended, Esme gasped.

"Not the point young man, you two are in trouble" Esme retorted quickly,

"Mum, come on this is harsh" Emmett added in,

"Yeah, I mean Jasper and me do stuff like that all the time" Alice added in, Edward flinched, a bit too much information but it was nice of them to help out, if it was helping? I wasn't sure.

"But they haven't been together as long as you four have been" Esme replied shortly.

"Mum, you should be able to see that they love each other just as much as any of us love each other, even more so" Alice chirped.

"Well yes, that is clear" Esme responded, "but I don't want you to rush yourselves, especially in front of me!"

"Mum, trust me we aren't, and I do love Bella, so, so much" Edward chanted, reaching a hand back; I reached out to take it with my own hand.

"Right, I'm leaving Bella and Jesus I hope that you are actually invisible and standing beside Edward instead of cowering behind him because you are 'three quarters naked'… Do not let me catch you like this again; I don't think I could handle anymore" Esme chanted and I raised my head slowly out from Edwards arm to see her tottering out of the room.

I noticed that everyone had also shifted further into the room.

"What the fuck are you guys doing in Bella's room anyway?" Edward suddenly burst, stepping forward, uncovering me, three quarters naked like everybody is continuing to mention.

"Edward" I hissed, trying futilely to cover myself, he rushed back to me, holding me to his side, not covering me but I felt safer.

"We were planning to redecorate your room today Bella, as a surprise" Alice chirped remorsefully,

"Guess what, I was _certainly_ surprised" Everybody started laughing and I giggled too, Edward stifled his own laughter.

"That's nice, but could you leave so we can"

"Continue" Emmett interrupted Edward, Emmett gave a booming high-five to Jasper who shook his hand afterwards in pain and I blushed because really I would really, really like to continue.

"No, I was going to say to get dressed" Edward continued,

"Well don't dress in your nice clothes because you two are going to help us too" Alice added, before skipping out of the room, dragging Jasper out with her. Rosalie followed her and turned around to me to give me a fierce 'juicy details later or well to be honest there isn't another option' look, I could only nod and hide my face behind Edward.

"Come on, just one high-five?" Emmett pleaded, with wide eyes to Edward.

"Get out Em" Edward instructed. Emmett actually did what he was told and sprinted out of the room animatedly, but he gave us a parting wink. Edward couldn't contain himself he burst out laughing.

"Are you kidding? That was horrible!" I remarked absolutely horrified.

"No, not at all it was but I'm just laughing at how incredibly lucky we are" he said turning me to him, hugging my waist, I left my hands on his wonderful chest.

"You call that luck?" I mocked,

"Hell yeah, I'm lucky I still have my head, and eardrums"

"Edward, your eardrums are somewhat attached to your head" I mocked further, he merely nuzzled his head into my shoulder, tickling me with his lovely hair making me giggle profusely.

"I do love you Bella" he whispered in between crawling kisses up and down my neck.

"Edward, the door" he picked me up and I wrapped my bare legs around his pushing myself against him; he carried us towards the door. He reached out one arm and pushed the door closed. He then pushed me onto the closed door, I giggled at the force. I kissed him strongly, winding my tongue with his. He released his arms from my back and let his hands trail up and down my body. I moaned as he freed my lips and trailed his kisses down my body.

"Cut it out!" Alice chanted with a heavy knock on the door. Edward gently set me down, he looked deep into my eyes;

"I love you Bella, never forget that" He said softly to me.

"I love you too Edward," I replied honestly, he grabbed me in a tight hug, lifting me off the ground but I left my legs limp. He always kept me safe, warm, protected, loved, and I love him.

"Never leave me" I whispered into his ear, he put me down gently and looked at me carefully;

"I won't, never, ever, ever I promise"

………

**EPOV**

The day was long, but I never left her for longer than necessary, I would always be back at her side. I ran quickly upstairs to get changed and met her downstairs for a quick breakfast round before our family discussed the decoration plans.

"Right, everybody today is a serious day" Esme bellowed, taking our attention, all of our heads flicked up to hers.

"This is how it is going to happen" she continued, "Girls, you first pack up all of Bella's stuff, then boys you will empty her room of everything else, furniture etc. I'll give you more instructions after then" we all sat around in awe.

"Go" she instructed and ushered us away, we all sprinted in random direction not knowing really where we were going.

"Fools" Esme muttered to herself and we nearly all fell to the floor with laughter.

The girls did their thing upstairs while Emmett and Jasper challenged me foolishly to a quick Xbox session. Naturally, I won, again and again, it is rather amazing how much time they took packing up her stuff, she only had one duffle bag to start with!

**BPOV**

So I was being held captive up in my room; we had long since packed all of my stuff into other bags ready for temporary movement.

"Bella, please do tell"

"Tell what?" I pleaded innocent

"Oh cut the crap Bella, tell us what you did with Edward?"

"I did nothing he is still downstairs" I joked, but they were angry now. I was sat on my bed and they were both looked (surprisingly) very big and intimidating.

"Look, just tell us how far you went?" Alice questioned again, I was so tempted to say 'we didn't go any where' but I knew that I would not get away with that.

"Not far like at all, just second" they gasped.

"What was it like?" Rosalie questioned, they had now sat down and were flanking me on my bed.

"Guys, you have done it before, you know what it was like" I said embarrassed, blushing fiercely.

"Of course we have, but what was it like _for you_?" Alice persisted,

"You wont stop or let me go before I tell you will you?" they both shook their innocent heads with little sympathy, more evil. Like gossip demons, beautiful lovely gossip demons. I was cornered by gossip demons, who's lovely demeanour are just to fool like a bug eating plant, 'come here my pretty, you can tell us everything, trust us, tell us…mwahaha'.

"Earth to Bella" Rosalie called, in her non-demonic tone I had just created for her in my mind.

"Yeah, sorry"

"Continue!" Alice instructed,

"For God's sake this is so embarrassing. It's just, I don't know how to describe it, it was so natural and right and brilliant it was like pure unadulterated, passion. It made me feel like I could finally free myself, and he helped me do that. I don't know that sounds really cheesy doesn't it?" I turned my head up to look at them because I was fidgeting with my dirty nails, I wash every single day; and still they are an absolute state. I should ask them about that.

"Baby Bella that was beautiful" Alice whimpered

"Beautiful? Seriously was that not the definition of cheesy?" I said, very confused.

"No, that is so sweet, and I can tell that Edward thinks the same, don't you Alice?" Rosalie added,

"Totally, you should of seen the grin on his face, like all day even when we burst in like that, it was like this big 'I have a super amazing girlfriend and I will love her forever and I totally got to second with her last night, it was amazing suck on that' sort of face" We all erupted in laughter once she had finished, when it died down Rosalie really threw me in at the deep end;

"So what did it feel like _physically_?" she asked with a wicked grin on her beautiful face.

"Are these details really needed?" I begged, they just gave me a 'you really can't be that thick or hopeful, tell us or death shall loom close' look, which is very impressive that they could both time the exact same look at the same time.

"His touches make me tingle with electricity all through my body, when his cold hands run up my body it makes me squirm and want more. His body is so perfect, he makes me feel safe. But he is so careful with me because of what I've well because of what Phil did to me. He treats me with respect, like I'm some sort of angel or something."

"Bella, come here" Rosalie said grabbing me in a tight hug, "you two are so perfect for each other" she continued.

"Rose, no fair, my turn" Alice whined, Rosalie let me go and Alice grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into an equally tight, loving hug. We got up and picked up the couple of bags of stuff and made our way out of the room;

"Oh and for the record Bella, you are his angel, so that is how you are going to be treated" Alice started,

"Yeah get used to it, it's no bad thing" Rosalie finished; their minds were in sync as well as their faces – expression wise.

We headed down stairs with our bags and the boys decided that their Xbox game was much more important that helping us down the stairs. Except from my wonderful Edward, he paused the game, making Emmett and Jasper moan and whine but he rushed up towards me took my bag and wrapped my arm around my back and led me down the stairs.

"Dude, he really is making us look bad!" Jasper moaned to Emmett, they both looked gobsmacked at such brilliant boyfriend material.

"Yes, that he is but then again you two are terrible anyway!" Rosalie remarked,

"Too right you two are terrible boyfriends, you should take a note from Edward's beautiful, caring book" Alice chirped. I smiled widely up to Edward he beamed back down.

"Am I really that good?" Edward turned to me, slinking his arms around my back. I nodded shyly, and looked up at him through my lashes.

"You are so beautiful Bella" he whispered into my neck.

"Dude, stop it, you are killing us here!" Emmett bellowed. Rosalie and Alice were sulking with their arms crossed across their chests; awaiting for their boyfriends to be pumped into good boyfriend action.

"Look, guys I'm sorry I just treat my wonderful girlfriend the way she should be, and I'm not going to stop for you" Edward said smugly, he was clearly just rubbing it in now, I mean yes he was a perfect boyfriend but he was enjoying seeing Jasper and Emmett squirm.

"What ever happened to bro's over ho's?" Emmett whined,

"Hey, watch your mouth Emmett and Bella is better than you two any day" Edward said affirmatively, this wasn't fair, Edward was brilliant but poor Emmett and Jasper they were seriously going to suffer.

"Guys, you are just making it easier for him, just shut up and attend to your girlfriends" I interrupted, they looked dumbfounded for a second then they raced up to their lovely other halves and tried their very best to help them out.

"Boys! I see that the girls are done, would you mind getting on with what I've told you to do" Esme yelled when she walked into the living room, calling the boys to attention. They straightened up military style, making Rosalie, Alice and I snigger uncontrollably.

"Go, go, go" Esme coached, they all ran up the stairs, into my room. I just hoped that they wouldn't have the same conversation I just had to endure…

**EPOV**

I realised soon after we had nearly cleared Bella's room of the terribly bland furniture why Bella and the girls had taken so long finishing, luckily I still had work to do so I was 'preoccupied' when they started;

"So…" Emmett started, leaning against the wall.

"So what?" I asked, trying to avoid the conversation for as long as possible.

"So, what did you do?" Jasper continued,

"What do you mean what did I do?" I asked again, but I soon realised that they would end up being hideously crude, oh dear.

"I mean how far did you go? What was it like?"

"There is no way that I am having this conversation with you" I stated blatantly.

"Oh come on dude, we will find out from Rosalie and Alice anyway, you might as well tell us your story"

"Eugh, you two are actually the devils children. Can't you just imagine instead of me telling you?" BAD IDEA

"Well sure we could little brother" Emmett started and dazed of into his horrible mind.

"NO! Stop, get that filth and my beautiful Bella out of your mind" I commanded and they turned their attention back to me.

"Go on then Eddie boy, tell us all"

I did, I told them everything well I didn't tell them the crude details but everything else, it was my pleasure to relish in the thoughts again. The girls eventually came up armed with a very impatient looking Esme.

"Boys, are you quite done?" Esme said shaking her head,

"Well, clearly you are done, why didn't you come down?" Esme asked again, I saw Bella's expression change as she saw the giddy expression that Emmett and Jasper were proudly wearing. She turned away from the door, and started to walk away quickly.

"Hey, Bella?" I shouted as I sprinted through Rosalie, Alice and Esme. I caught sight of her going down the stairs,

"Bella, hold up" I shouted for her again, when she reached the bottom of the stairs she turned back to look at me running down them.

"You told them" she stated more than questioned,

"Yeah, I didn't know that I wasn't allowed to" I answered honestly I walked towards her but she took a couple of steps back.

"Come on, you told Rosalie and Alice" I defended,

"That's different" she whispered,

"How?"

"It just is, I mean Rosalie and Alice wont mock you about it"

"Seriously? You know that they are only joking, and I can totally tell them not to"

"But," she whispered,

"But nothing Bella, unless you are ashamed? Do you regret it?" I asked, begging that her answer was no. But her face looked bizarre, beautiful bit still.

"No of course I'm not and no I don't regret it" she said, walking towards me.

"Then what is the problem?" I asked, still curious.

"I know that Emmett wont drop this, even if you tell him to" she finished, she was telling the truth he probably wouldn't. I wrapped my arms around her waist,

"Bella, I don't want to push you, I don't need that okay, all I need is you. We don't need to do anything like that again, not if you don't want"

"Hmm, what makes you think that you are all I need"


	33. Chapter 33 Decorate

**BPOV**

Edward and myself had found ourselves in yet another make-out session, until we were interrupted by Esme, I felt bad she had definitely seen too much of this. Once we had all of my stuff removed Esme decided that she didn't want my help. Another surprise, yay, I just _love _surprises, along with gifts.

Not only that she still wanted the help of everybody else, so I was alone, and awaiting a surprise and probably plenty of gifts. I decided instead of moping around all day that I shuffle along upstairs and do some painting. I was about to 'accidently' go out of my way to check on my room but they had Jasper and Emmett guarding the door.

"Are you guys not allowed in?" I mocked as I carried on in the direction of the art room.

"No, we are allowed in, we just thought we'd take the job of keeping you out" Jasper boomed as I walked up the second set of stairs.

"Edward is allowed in… YOU!" Emmett boomed, then he erupted in laughter I could practically see the judgement on Jaspers face. I decided I wouldn't reply, I would just go and breathe and paint and breathe Bella. Woosaa.

I was previously prepared for decorating so I didn't have to undress this time, I was wearing an old flannel shirt of Edwards that he lent me and some scrappy shorts. I looked around the beautiful room they had made me, it took my breath away every single time I entered. I noticed that my iPod was in the dock ready to be played and there was a post-it note on top of it.

_Never doubt me young one_

_I love you, Edward xxx_

My lovely, lovely, brilliant, fantastic, beautiful, future-foreseeing, wonderful, gorgeous (and many other positive adjectives) boyfriend. I turned my iPod on and the music started to boom; Bruises by Chairlift. This was the song, I had to pick up a paintbrush and quickly grabbed a canvas pronto, and started. Letting my mind lose and the connection of paint, brush, fingers, arms, neck, eyes, mind, thoughts was seamless.

……..

**EPOV**

We had been decorating all day, well in shifts. Esme, Rosalie and Alice had chosen to decorate it vintage-y and minimal sort of thing. Turns out they had already brought the furniture and just well everything. The boys and I have been trying (unsuccessfully) to lug up a bed, a wardrobe, selves, a mirror and just about everything else.

So when we finished I offered kindly to go and get Bella, I rushed up to the art studio where she was destined to be, the music was very loud and I knocked really hard on the door. She didn't answer so I crept the door open.

"NO!" I heard her scream and she threw herself at the door so it slammed shut again.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. I wont come in I promise" I said through the door, shouting over the music.

"Hold on, one second!" she shouted back, I faintly heard her scamper from the door, she turned off the music and my ears were at rest.

"Bella?" I called after a minute of silence.

"Okay, okay it's cool you can come in" she said. I cautiously opened the door and peeked in.

"Edward, I said it was okay" she said, running up to me and grabbing my hand.

"So where is it?" I questioned, confused when I didn't see a canvas anywhere and yet there were paints and paintbrushes strewn across the room, and not to mention on Bella.

"Where's what?" she answered 'innocently'

"Your new painting?" I wrapped my arms around her,

"I didn't do one today" she answered,

"Oh really?"

"Yep"

"Bella, you are covered in paint and expect me to believe that you didn't create another wonderful painting"

"Fine, but you aren't allowed to tell anyone, it's going to be a surprise" she said whilst wriggling from my hold she walked behind a big desk and pulled out a truly, truly glorious painting. I was standing in awe and silence for a while before she interrupted my wonderment.

"What do you think? Will they like it?" she asked nervously,

"Bella nobody could not like that" I replied honestly

"But now come on, because we have a surprise for you, even though you already know that it is going to happen" I continued before I whisked her up and down the stairs and to her door way. They were all waiting inside;

"Bella, let me cover your eyes yeah?" I positioned her in front of me, my hands resting on her shoulders.

"Yep, sure I trust you" she answered quietly; it was really cute, but I didn't get too distracted and covered her eyes softly with one of mine and I turned the door knob and pushed it open, I swiftly moved my over hand up so now both her eyes had a blinding hand each.

I smiled at my sniggering family as I walked Bella in. The room did look amazing, I hoped with all my heart that she would love it.

"Okay Bella, you ready?"

**BPOV**

"Okay Bella, you ready?" Edward asked me softly, not removing my eyes. I nodded in response after calming my breathing.

Edward slowly released my eyes but I had clamped them shut in preparation I didn't want to see yet, I don't think that I was ready. I heard the whole family in front of me sighing.

"Come on Bella" Edward urged, stroking my arms.

"Yeah, yeah I will hold on" I stood, shook my head and burst my eyes quickly open to see my new lovely family in front of me grinning like crazy people.

I threw my eyes around the room I instantly saw my new bed, it was an amazing old antique it was wood but painted white and it had crackled making it look older it had intertwining patterns and flowers at the head rest, oh and it was big, it was at least a queen. It had a plain white duvet on it and it was placed against the wall next to the glass wall where as it had been facing the glass against the wall and on the wall of the door. At the bottom of the bed there was a very short chest of drawers similar to the bed and on top of them was Charlie's trunk that he had given me.

I then noticed the walls, they were covered and littered completely in hundreds of frames, I walked up to them they were filled with pictures of everyone and me, Edward and myself, Rosalie Alice and me, some left over pictures that we decided shouldn't go in Esme's present, there were so many. On the wall with the door there were several shelves, they had some more frames and books and another iPod dock. I noticed that they had put photos from Charlie's trunk into the frames too.

Placed diagonally in the corner of the wall opposite my bed was a wardrobe, it was thin but still big; on the outside of one of the door there was a mirror on the door of the wardrobe. It was marvellous; it was extraordinary, it was many, many other adjectives describing what a brilliant room that they had created for me again.

I turned back to the wonderful family baring anxious smiles, and yes I was crying, I am a giant cry-baby and yes it is surprising that I don't faint from dehydration because I loose more liquids than I intake.

"You guys have to stop being so good to me" I said opening my arms wide, inviting a group hug, even though they are deadly that many limbs can not be intertwined without some sort of major damaged following the separation or movement of the group hug; proven theory – and no I didn't count my bias due to my clumsiness.

They complied quickly,

"Bella, I'm not even going to go into how stupid that comment was" Esme stated while smiling brightly.

"So you really like it?" Alice asked hopefully, clearly giddy and proud at her creation

"Of course I do!" I screeched and ran to her, Rosalie and Esme grabbing them in a tight hug.

"Bella, we helped too" Emmett sulked and signalled towards himself, Jasper and Edward.

"I know you did, come here" I waved my hands at them and patted my legs like signalling dogs over. They wrapped their large arms around me, completely smothering and surrounding me.

"So everybody, I really can not be bothered to make you dinner, order some pizza" Esme chanted while gliding out of the room.

"Thank you Esme!" I boomed after her,

"My pleasure" she shouted back. Emmett had a wicked childish grin on his face.

"Pizza, pizza, pizza" Emmett started chanting over and over.

"Um Emmett, you do know that crazy people aren't allowed to eat pizza" Edward mocked, wrapping his arms around me from the back, he rested his head on my shoulder.

"Dude, they cant tell that you are crazy down the phone. I'm good" Emmett finished he rushed out of the room, grinning from ear to ear, he ran down the stairs – you could hear each step boom and practically shake the house.

"Crap, what do you guys want?" He boomed up at us, Rosalie just chuckled to herself strolling out of the room.

"So, what do you want Edward?" I whispered turning my face and whispered onto his cheek.

"To be honest I'm not sure if it is appropriate for me to answer at the moment" Edward whispered back onto my neck.

"Oh gag me" Alice chirped; and she un-subtly winking at me while skipping out of the room.

"One with lots of meat for me yeah Jazz," Edward called, just catching Jasper's attention as he was following Alice from the room.

"Alright Eddie, what about you Bella?" Jasper asked, not only am I terrible at making decisions Edward was slowly slinking his hands under my shirt, wrapping his large hands around my stomach.

"Um I'll go just something without anything on" I replied, my mind quickly running away.

"You want a plain tomato and cheese pizza?" Jasper mocked, I whizzed around to look at him, pulling Edward with me.

"Yes, that isn't abnormal" I stated, glaring playfully,

"Well I would have figured that you would have chosen something that would take longer to prepare if you get what I mean" Jasper replied, eyebrows raised

"Oh Jazz, you are so unlucky that I do get what you mean" Edward warned behind me, Jasper just waved playfully and raced from the room; leaving Edward and myself alone.

**I have been laptop less for like two days – sorry, and sorry it is short, it will get better again. I promise, hopefully xxx**


	34. Chapter 34 Screams

**BPOV**

To say the very least the rest of the weekend was absolute bliss. I loved my new room it suited me so well, Edward basically never left my side except from when absolutely necessary. We spent Sunday outside doing 'family' things; it was a bizarre event for me – we actually played like games and stuff. It was so much fun; it made me feel like a child, a child with a very attractive boyfriend.

Edward had slept with me in my new room on both Saturday and Sunday night. He kept me so calm and safe. He would wrap his arms around me and it was like my scars would just fall away and disappear, not just my physical ones, the memories.

I woke up groggily in the morning, resting lightly with Edward's arm under my head. I decided it wouldn't be _too _weird to draw my lovely topless boyfriend, with the sun bouncing of off his flawless skin and his hair wild with sleep (and just sleep). I slowly and carefully rolled of off the bed and strode towards my iPod in the dock and the new sketch book that I had been drawing in recently. I grabbed my colours and started my iPod on shuffle, opened my book to a clean page, attempted to capture the perfect beauty that was Edward.

I had been drawing for about twenty minutes; my hand was only aching slightly. When Edward started to slowly wake up, I quickly rushed of off the bed but got my foot caught in the covers and I smacked hard against the floor; waking Edward up.

"Bella, are you okay?" I scrambled upwards and flung my sketchbook away hoping he wouldn't notice, I jumped up and spun to face him.

"Yeah, I'm good, sorry for waking you" I apologised crawling towards his now upright body, I was about to wriggle my arms around his neck when his eyes peeked over my shoulder.

"So, what's that then?" he questioned, slowly shifting away from me and towards the end of the bed.

"That's nothing, absolutely nothing" I said trying to urge him back to my side. He was inching out off the duvet.

"Come on Bella, you did wake me" he 'argued'

"Hey, unfair I didn't mean to!" I defended, following him off the bed.

"Bella, just let me see what you were drawing" he whined as I grabbed onto his legs as he slowly dragged me along the floor to my not-so-cleverly thrown sketch book.

"No, no" I whined back as he picked up the book. He started to flick through it and I decided to jump on his back and cover his eyes.

"Bella" he said sternly, removing my hands with one of his.

"Let me see" he instructed, I sulked back off his back and I crawled over my chest of drawers and my trunk and swivelled back around to watch him. He shook his gaze from my now seated bottom and looked at my newest addition to my sketch book.

"Please don't think I'm weird" I muttered as he gazed at it. I decided that I wouldn't look at his reaction; I would wait for his pure revolution to turn into words instead of watch as it crept onto his face.

"Is this me?" he asked gently, coming to sit next to me sketch book in hand.

"No, um it's me actually. Of course it's you" I said worry shaking my words, he let out a breath of laughter before continuing.

"Bella it is beautiful, seriously look at the detail" he answered, tilting my head up but my eyes darted towards the open book, I could see so many flaws, looking at my beautiful Edward now there were so many things that weren't right. I mean the cheek bones were at least 4 degrees lower than it should be.

"Bella, look at me" he instructed growing impatient, with a smile on his beautiful face

"That's better, my beautiful Bella. Stop scrutinizing it, it's wonderful" he ushered, moving towards my lips.

"Hmm, I don't think I got everything right" I whispered back onto his nearing lips. He pulled back and looked at me.

"Bella I just told you it is brilliant" he burst out, "Why don't you listen to me?" he moaned, I decided I would interrupt him; I pounced onto his lips and wriggled onto his lap. He seemed to forget whatever point he had, he pulled us back so he was lying on his back. His hands crawled underneath my vest top and my hands trailed down his perfectly toned chest.

"Bella we have school" he gasped as I released his mouth and started to place little kisses down his neck.

"I know that" I said raising my head back to his, and I rest my head on his forehead.

"That means that we can't get carried away" he ushered, his mind clearly battling to move his lips the millimetres to connect with mine; his lips were actually twitching.

"I think you have a _very_ good point" I teased rolling off him and the bed, I walked towards my new wardrobe; shedding my pj's to the floor and checking Edward's expression - in my new mirror- his eyes widened, I smiled at my accomplishment.

"Bella, no fair" he moaned as he rolled off of the bed and strolled towards me.

"Oh well I'm sorry we have school today" I mocked, turning around from inspecting my wardrobe. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me up, urging me to wrap my legs around him.

"Screw school" Edward cursed against my neck,

"Oh shush you, now I'm going to get dressed" I unravelled my legs and waited to be put down but Edward was pouting profusely. I just gave him a 'put me down or else' look and he obliged sulkily.

"Can I stay a little bit longer?" he said with his arms still around me,

"Hmm, I don't know; can you behave?" I warned with a big smile, he nodded and shuffled to my bed and he jumped on and lay on his back resting up on his elbows.

I decided on some thick black patterned tights, because recently I've been freezing, and a long thin dark red top with long sleeves and a large knitted warm cream cardigan. Also I had some boots, ankle high dark grey leather boots. Edward had skipped of to his room when I went to do morning things in the bathroom. I then slowly trudged downstairs to get some milk and breakfast. Esme was already downstairs

"Morning Bella, bacon sandwiches for breakfast, you good with that?" She beamed as I strolled towards the fridge.

"Oh yes please Esme" I chanted back as I filled my glass and made my way to the table.

"So, you ready for another week at school?" Esme asked politely.

"Yeah," I answered absentmindedly,

"Is something wrong with school?" she asked concerned with my answer, even though it was a positive answer.

"No, not at all; I am really enjoying it. But it's only school, it's the same week in week out. There isn't anything that distinguishes one day from the next. No drama, but that isn't particularly a bad thing, just no drama"

………

Like I said to Esme earlier, everyday was painfully the same at school; I was currently sitting next to Jessica in lesson, god not out of choice. I was just sitting with my iPod playing at an acceptable volume. I was praying for time to pass quicker so I could go and have lunch with my friends. The bell rang but I was a little delayed due to the headphones; I started to slowly pack up my things barely concentrating.

"Bella, can I talk to you?" Jessica asked, staring at me with a weird grin on her face. It was so tempting to just ask 'do you have to?' but I decided to be _urgh _pleasant.

"Yeah, course what did you want?" It came out a bit more blunt than I had wanted but she didn't seem to notice.

"Well, I know you are like the Cullen's dirty little secret"

"What?" I asked astounded at her rudeness.

"No body knows anything about you, well nobody except from me"

"What?!" I asked again,

"Don't play dumb Bella, you can't keep lying to them"

"Jessica I don't actually know what you are talking about" I dragged out the words, patronisingly but what was she talking about.

"Bella, I know that Charlie Swan wasn't you real father"

"Choose you're words very carefully Jessica" I warned but she seemed to dismiss me and continued anyway.

"You're _real_ Dad phoned the police station looking for you, why would you lie about something like that?" I just stood in silence, who did she think my real Dad was?

"You can't even like justify it Bella. But look I won't tell anyone as long as you stop acting like you are as good as the Cullens, you so don't deserve Edward. I mean seriously he is hot, and you are just not" she giggled to herself and the sound made my stomach twist in knots.

"Jessica, who phoned the police station?" I finally asked,

"You're _real _Dad, like I just said"

"What was his name?"

"Urgh, you should know he is your Dad"

"Stop fucking around, who was it?" I said angrily, growing scared and impatient,

"I don't know, like Bill or Phil or something" Phil, he was looking for me. He was going to come for me. I started rapidly towards the class room door.

"So do we like have a deal I wont tell anyone you're secret, even though it is like so wrong" I just continued to the door, about to open it when she continued;

"Fine, I'll tell everyone that you are just a gold-digging, lying slut!" she screeched, I lost it and ran towards her and punched her hard in the face, she fell to the floor screaming in pain and clutching her horrible face. There were several on-lookers now at the door.

"You saw that! She just hit me; I don't know how anybody could believe you were related to Charlie Swan. You are crazy!" She screeched, I hit her in the face again.

"You know nothing about me!" I screamed to her and the rest of the crowd at the door. I sprinted out of the room and struggled through the huddle of people once I was out of their range I started into a sprint again, I should run to Edward, but he wouldn't be able to help me, Phil was a monster I don't want Edward to get hurt. I couldn't be anywhere near them, not if he was coming.

**EPOV**

"Edward!" Alice screamed from the entrance of the cafeteria, her face was awash with tears, and no Bella. She had said that she would meet Bella at her class instead of me, for a reason beyond my knowledge. I sprinted towards her, my family close behind me.

"What Alice, come on what is it? Where is Bella?" I bombarded her with questions, Jasper was in front of me wiping the tears away.

"She ran"

"Alice what do you mean she ran?" Jasper asked, my mind was a fury of questions and emotions.

"She, she ran out of school, she was heading towards the main road" Alice said shakily, I reacted I didn't think I just did. I ran towards my car as fast as I could.

"Edward wait!" I heard Alice screech as I was about to get in my car; the rest of my family were close behind her.

"Why did she run Alice? What happened?" I asked running back to her.

"It was Jessica, she said that Phil was asking for her at the police station. Jessica has it wrong, she thinks that Phil was Bella's real Dad. She accused Bella of lying to all of us, she called her a slut. Bella lost it and hit her, I couldn't get to her there was a big crowd outside the classroom I couldn't reach Bella before she started to run. I'm sorry" she rambled out, for once I could understand everything that she was saying.

"What a bitch, I am going to sort that girl out" Rosalie threatened from Alice's side.

"Okay, Rosalie, Emmett can you find out what you can from Jessica, if Phil is coming we need to know" It made me nearly hurl to say those two names, especially Phil, he wasn't worthy of any recognition. They nodded solemnly and started on their way to find her. I sprinted back towards the car. Jasper and Alice followed me.

I raced from the car park so quickly it made me slightly dizzy, I sped down the road and slowed slightly when we got far enough away that she would have managed in the time gone. I spotted from the corner of my eye a small figure struggling against the head on winds, still running I raced ahead and swerved so the car stopped sideways in front of her. I opened the door without turning the ignition off, I raced from the car and sprinted towards her. She looked up at me completely shocked, I stopped a couple of metres away from her.

"What are you doing here?" she bellowed, letting me fully see her face, it was crumpled with fear, confusion and anger, tears tumbling down her face.

"I think I should be asking you that!" I bellowed back, walking towards her slowly but she only backed away.

"I thought you were done running Bella" I shouted to her, she dropped her head; I followed her head and found that her tights were now covered in holes and she had many grazes covering her small pale legs.

"He will come for me Edward!" she shouted back,

"So you figured you would just give yourself up? Being alone won't help you!" I shouted back, she raised her head and ran her hands through her hair.

"He can not come near you Edward!" She bellowed, hands still in her hair.

"He won't! I'm not letting you run away from me!"

"You won't be able to stop him!"

"Bella, he will not get you" I shouted still,

"You don't understand Edward, I can't stop him" she said losing the volume in her voice.

"We will not let him get to you; we won't let him get to any of us"

"I know, that is because I'm going to go so he won't even know about you"

"Please do not do this to me!" I begged, walking towards her.

"I can't have you hurt for something I have done" she took two little steps backwards.

"You are not responsible for him. He will not get you, I promise"

"You can't promise things like that Edward" she whimpered

"I can, he is not getting near you"

"He could hurt you, I have to go" she said taking some more shaky steps backwards

"Bella you can't leave, don't leave me" I pleaded still walking towards her, my own face crumpled restricting my watery eyes. She fell to her knees and started crying furiously into her hands. I ran up to her and wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm so scared Edward"


	35. Chapter 35 Suspense

**EPOV**

I had eventually got Bella to get in the car with me, she was so shaken up. She persisted that she didn't want to go back to school but I said that we had to. As soon as we were back on campus she was called to the principal's office. I then persisted that I should come too; I led her there and saw Jessica waiting outside with her little gang of minions surrounding her.

I gripped Bella's hand tightly and she half smiled at me, obviously struggling to put it on her face. My gaze was then taken to Jessica's face; she was positively purple. I was somewhat proud of Bella, being able to knock her silly. 'Whispers' were cast as soon as we were visible.

"There you are you stupid little slut" Lauren, Jessica's partner in hideousness, said threateningly, standing up and walking towards Bella.

"Do I even know you?" Bella surprised me, by being so upfront

"No, but you are lucky I don't" Lauren struggled to retort,

"Yeah I would second that" Bella spoke clearly again,

"Whatever, but you are so in for it. Jessica has told everyone about your _real _Dad" Lauren said spitefully. Bella tensed slightly but grew again quickly

"Look, I don't actually give a shit what you say about me or my family"

"What family?" Lauren argued, Bella looked up at me pleadingly. She clearly wanted to hit Lauren. I shook my head she would only get in more trouble.

"Ouch Jess that looks like it hurts, do you fancy telling your friend that before I hit her too?" Bella threatened, she knew she wasn't going to hit Lauren but the threat did make Lauren retreat.

"Stupid bitch" Lauren murmured, she was interrupted by the receptionist waddling in.

"Lauren Bella, he will see you know" she said, leading out her arm, directing them. Bella looked up to me, wanting guidance.

"Can I go in with Bella?" I asked politely, trying very hard to gain eye contact with the receptionist.

"No, this matter has nothing to do with you Mr. Cullen" she said bluntly, and rather rudely.

"Bella is involved, meaning it has everything to do with me" I said just as bluntly

"Sit down Mr. Cullen" she ordered.

"Just let me go in" I pleaded but with an authority that I didn't know I had.

"Mr. Cullen sit down or you'll have to visit him" she saw my face light up and quickly added; "At another time _on your own" _she stressed.

Bella let go of my hand and followed Jessica into the room, the receptionist had the nerve to give my Bella a dirty look as she went past. The utter fucking cheek of it, she had been so nice to her before, I had a right mind to storm in there; I should be right next to her, never leaving her, making her feel safe.

……….

She had only been in there ten minutes, which is much shorter than I could imagine. She came out looking fine, but I know that underneath she was so frightened; but to Jessica and the rest of her minions she showed that she didn't have a care in the world.

I stood up as soon as she came out; I stood still as she rushed towards me. She jumped up and wrapped her arms around my neck, I grabbed her waist pulling her up, she wrapped her legs around me.

"I've been suspended"

**BPOV**

I decided that yes I was frightened more than anything about the possible return of Phil, but instead of showing that Jessica had any effect on me; even though she clearly did enough for me to hit her, that I would walk in head held high. Not that I didn't want Edward with me, I walked in to the small room to find a funny seated man.

"Sit down" he commanded and I quickly found my seat, smiling a little – yes I was rather smug that I had hit her, and smug at how big and bruised her face had become.

"Miss Swan I believe that you hit Jessica?"

"Um yeah" What a ridiculous question, of course I did.

"What sort of attitude is that, you just seriously harmed a member of our student body?"

"I know that I did, I don't commend my behaviour. But I did it, I can't take it back" I stated flatly.

"Why did you hit her?" he asked bluntly,

"Because she is a psycho-freak!" Jessica blurted out, which I personally thought was rude. The principal nodded!

"Um I'm afraid that is not the case, on many occasions my 'saneness' has been proven to be perfectly fine. I hit you Jessica because you didn't have one single iota of knowledge due to what the fuck you were talking about. And you called me a 'gold-digging liar slut'" I said blatantly, waiting for the on call that would be my explosion.

"Miss Swan that is quite enough" the principal finally said. I raised my hands up in 'surrender'.

"See, do you see what I mean!" Jessica said with volume.

"Jessica enough from you too" He spoke again,

"Why are you calling her Jessica and me Miss Swan?" I asked curiously, he was dumb-founded, it was a simple question, but he didn't respond anyway.

"Alright then Isabella, you are being suspended for a week" he stated, I was surprised I thought I was going to get much longer, or even excluded, apparently Jessica was too.

"What the hell, she assaulted me! She should be excluded!" Jessica out-bursted again.

"To be frank Jessica, I've heard that Isabella is one of the most intelligent members of our school, she behaves and she has never had an out-burst here before so really it seems that I can only blame you for causing this fuss. I am not going to exclude her when she will get some of the highest grades we will produce." I was some what proud of myself. I had dumb-founded the principal and I would never get excluded because I was too intelligent for the school to lose.

"But, but, she hasn't even apologised" Jessica stumbled,

"I'm sorry that I am so good at throwing a punch" I apologised, smiling to myself.

"Isabella, get out and I don't want to see you here for another week" he ordered, I gladly skipped out off the room.

I saw my Edward standing up as soon as he saw me. I decided that I would make this bad news a little bit sweeter. I bounded up to him quickly and he pulled me up and I wrapped my legs around him and he gripped me tightly.

"I've been suspended" I purred into his ear, he pulled me back,

"Seriously?" he asked, I nodded solemnly

"I'm sorry" I continued,

"Don't be daft, but I'm going to have to get myself suspended too"

"No Edward, don't be silly, you could just come down with a bad case of 'boy flu' and it is only for a week" I said, his mouth dropped,

"Really?" he asked,

"Yep," I answered cheerfully, he replied with a couple of light kisses on my lips.

"But you don't need to stay home with me"

"But I want to Bella; I'll keep your mind busy. I can't have you suffering from cabin fever or anything"

"That sounds good" I replied, I rushed my lips back to his and he tightened his grip on me, pulling me closer.

"Mr. Cullen put her down this instant!" The principal boomed, I turned my head to see him looking very angry.

"Come on, down" he urged I turned back to Edward and he was pouting like a child. He slowly put me down and I intertwined my fingers with his.

"I thought I told you to get out of here Miss Swan"

"Well yes I do remember you saying something as polite as that sir" I mocked; he nodded and waved me off. Edward and I turned to started to walk out of school,

"Oh sir, I would just like to say in advance I'm coming down with a terrible flu" Edward chirped as we slinked out of the small room. We walked across the car park to the lovely Volvo.

"So darling, what on earth are you going to tell Esme and Carlisle?" Edward said softly guiding me to the car.

"Is it out of the question that I tell them the truth?" I asked, I don't think that I would be able to lie to them, not that I would want to.

"Of course you should tell them the truth" he led me into the car, he paused, rushed around the car and continued when he got to his door, "It's just how much of the truth you want to tell them?"

"Hmm, I think that I will tell them everything. I don't want to keep things from them"

………….

**EPOV **

We decided that we would wait for the rest of the family to finish school instead of going backwards and forwards. We went out of the car and sat on the small patch of green near the car.

"Edward I can't stop thinking about him" she whispered crawling closer to me, I was sitting cross legged and I pulled her onto my lap so she was able to push her back into my chest.

"I know, I know" I ushered as I moved her hair onto her back so I could rest my chin on her neck.

"I know its hard Bella, but try your hardest not to think about him" I said lightly, she moaned and threw her head back against me.

"And everything was going so perfectly, I was stupid to think that it would have been okay" she whined, I kissed her lightly along her shoulder.

"Bella, it's going to be okay, and am glad to hear that you are enjoying yourself" She lightly laughed after I finished.

"You are so strong Bella, you can get through this, and I know you can" I promised, "And you don't have to do this on your own, I'm here, we'll do this together" She turned her face and smiled weakly at me.

"How long do we have?" she asked quietly, I pulled out my phone, realising that I really needed to get one for Bella.

"Only ten minutes," I said wrapping my arms tighter around her, she was getting a bit cold, she wrapped her arms around mine and tightened her fingers in mine.

"Hmm, this may be inappropriate but do you think you could help me forget about you know him" She shuffled around in my lap and looked at me with her big beautiful eyes. How could anybody resist? I helped her forget for the next ten minutes before the school car park started to fill up.

Even though Alice had travelled with us and collected Bella, Alice still managed to hug the life out of Bella when she arrived. On the way home after we were all cramped in my lovely, brilliant Volvo Rosalie told us what she had learnt from Jessica. She had apparently squealed as soon as they walked up to her, which is fair play Rosalie _and _Emmett can be very intimidating.

"That idiot told us that she was over listening at the diner to some policemen chatting about the mysterious call from a guy looking for you. She then jumped to conclusions and figured that she would spread some hideous rumours, I nearly flipped out didn't I babe?" Rosalie blurted, Bella's face was pale, well paler than usual.

"Oh yes, Jessica was only seconds away from being a little pulp of hideousness on the floor. Luckily I was there to stop Rosalie, don't need any more trouble do we Miss Bella?" Emmett continued and mocked, I gave him a 'be careful' look and looked to see Bella turning slightly red.

"Emmett you better watch out, you've seen what she can do" Jasper mocked Emmett and gave Bella a sympathetic and playful tap on the shoulder; she was sitting shot gun and Jasper behind her, who was underneath Alice.

"Yeah, you just watch out Emmett, I could take you lemon squeeze-y" Bella said turning back to 'glare' at Emmett, but her voice was a little shaky and her playful smile didn't fill her soft eyes.

We got home in no time at all, it quietened back down to just mindless banter and gossip, Bella was clearly very distracted and a couple of sneaky looks in the rear view mirror I could tell that my whole family were just as worried. When I parked up the rest of them scrambled out while Bella just kept staring out of her side window.

"Bella, we're home" I said lightly, outreaching my hand to touch hers slowly

"Yeah I know" she said back, turning her head to me and trying to give a confident smile.

"Let's go tell you're parents that I hit a girl, got suspended, and that my devil of a step-father is looking for me" she rushed, her eyes started to water. I quickly raced out and around the car and opened her door to pick her up in my arms; she started to mumble completely incoherent things.

"Shush, Bella, shush, you're okay, you're okay" I repeated, she wrapped her arms tightly around my neck, and I pulled her back a little to look at her, her eyes were over-spilling slightly, making her skin under her eyes glisten in the lowering sunshine.

"I'm sorry" she whispered, pulling herself back to the cave of my neck,

"Would you stop apologising, please?" I pleaded, holding her slightly out again so I could look at her, she nodded lightly and her lips twitched as she tried not to say sorry for saying sorry too much.

"Come on then" I said softly, placing her back on the ground, I intertwined my fingers in hers strongly and she smiled up at me, it broke my heart to know that she couldn't feel the same happiness that her smile was faking.

We walked slowly inside and dumped our bags in the living room before meeting everyone in the kitchen.

"Hey Mum," I chirped as I walked in, Esme smiled widely at me before her smile vanished when she saw Bella.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Esme chanted, walking over to her side stroking her arm gently.

"I um have something to tell you and Carlisle something pretty important" she said quietly,

"Well, darling Carlisle is on his way home now; you just sit down grab some food, it'll be okay" she urged Bella, Esme gave her a big warming smile before outspreading her arm leading to the table.

Esme was right and Carlisle came home in about five minutes, the family walked from the kitchen leaving Bella, Esme, Carlisle and myself in the kitchen.

"Carlisle, Bella has something to tell us" Esme chanted as he walked in, he brought Esme with him to sit down opposite us on the table.

**BPOV**

"So Bella, what is it?" Carlisle asked cautiously, sitting down. Blurt it out or slide into it, blurt it out, slide into it, blurt, slide, blurt, slide. I said those words so many times in my head they stopped sounding like words just weird sounds. Go with your gut, _oh yeah because it has served me so well in the past, _hey I wound up here didn't I?

"I've been suspended from school" I said, watching their faces contort with shock, I looked to Edward who just shrugged, with an 'I'm sorry, I love you but you are the one that's suspended, did I mention I love you' look.

"I hit a girl in our class," I paused shortly and they gasped, Esme covered her mouth in shock.

"Please, don't judge me yet. I am sorry for hitting her I shouldn't have but she was talking about stuff she didn't understand, she really offended me with words that I would not like to replay, and she told me that Phil was looking for me" I quickly blurted out.

"Phil?" Esme choked, I nodded slowly, my eyes were watering again.

"Oh darling, come on, come here" Esme ran around the table and wrapped me in a tight hug.

"Well, I definitely do not commend violence but I think she was clearly due it." Carlisle spoke delicately

"Honey, tell us about Phil, what did she say about Phil?" Esme said, panic drowning her words, and then I reckon I fainted.


	36. Chapter 36 Sleep

**EPOV**

Everything started in slow motion, Bella's eyes slowly crawled up her eyelids and her head fell towards the floor, Esme fell out of the way and Carlisle started to stand. I rushed my hands forward to catch Bella before she hit the floor, I grabbed her shoulders and her head shook and fell limp backwards.

"Bella, Bella, Bella" I chanted softly to her empty body.

"Edward, go up to my study – she's only fainted she'll be fine. Get some smelling salts" Carlisle ordered, crouching by my side.

"I can't leave her, I won't leave her" I whispered,

"You are the fastest, she's safe" Carlisle commanded, pushing against my shoulder to get to her. I silently gave her to Carlisle and started to sprint up the stairs. Come on, move faster. I rushed through the cupboards unsure of where they were. A collection of bodies gathered at the door,

"Edward, what's wrong?" Alice asked cautiously from the door, edging in slightly.

"Bella, she's fainted" I said not distracting myself from the task at hand. I finally found them, gripped the small bottle tightly and made my way through my family and rushed back downstairs, my breathing so heavy.

"Dad, I'm back, is she okay? Here, make her okay" I blurted out panic rushing through my veins. Carlisle slowly waved the now open bottle under her nose, propping her head up. I rushed to her other side, holding her hand,

"Come on Bella" I whispered as I raised her hand to place a light kiss on the back of her hand. Her eyelids started to flutter, they sprang open, her breathing suddenly hitched and her eyes darted around the room.

"Edward" she gasped as her eyes landed in mine, I grasped her hand tighter in mine.

"Yeah Bella, you're good, you're safe" I whispered to her. Her eyes widened,

"No, he's here" Her voice was shaking uncontrollably,

"No, Bella, no he's not" I assured her, but she shook her head viciously.

"Whenever I close my eyes, he's there."

……..

I tried to comfort Bella as much as I could after that. I slowly helped her up and took her to her bedroom where I gave her, her sketchbook and made sure that she was happy. I silently texted Rosalie asking her to inform Esme and Carlisle of the situation that we know it, making sure I never left Bella's side.

When dinner came I asked her gently if she would like to join the others, she nodded weakly but I decided against it knowing that she didn't really have the energy too. I rushed downstairs to collect dinner for myself and Bella, she ate ridiculously slowly and I kept my pace slow not to put her out of place. She didn't even finish;

"Bella, it's important you eat" I coached, she turned to me with her big chocolate pain ridden eyes.

"I'm not hungry" she whispered, begging me. She was too tired to argue or eat. I reached out to gently stroke her back reassuringly.

"Do you want a bath or a shower?" I asked after a while of silence, that I knew I should be filling for her because I shouldn't be letting her mind wander off to him.

"I'm too tired" she whispered, hanging her heavy head upwards fighting the tiredness. She was trying her hardest not to close them, blinking furiously quickly and keeping them open for ages, but her heavy lids would slowly dip back down in front of her gaze.

"Well then, let's get you ready for bed" I ushered quietly, I was expecting protest but instead she nodded slowly and shuffled the tray that was still holding half of her dinner to the side of her on the bed. I picked it up from her and placed it near the door, ready to take it downstairs.

I turned back to her and she had raised her knees up and she was hugging them to her chest, I rushed back over to her crouching down on the floor in front of her so I could clearly see her face.

"Do you think he'll come in my sleep?" she asked quietly, I had to replay her words in my mind to figure out what she had said.

"Bella, I won't leave you; you'll have me and you're iPod. He wont come to get you" I ushered to her stroking the hair from her face, she nodded slowly again. She started to shrug out of her large cardigan and shivered when she was down a layer.

"You aren't ready for bed Edward" she murmured as I was slowly and gently sliding her tights over her swore legs from where she had fallen running from the school earlier.

"It's okay, I'll get ready in a bit" I assured her, her eyes fluttered quickly and she slowly lifted her heavy arms and waited for me to pull her top up. I quickly rushed a big baggy grey jumper over her and some long trackies of mine that I had left in here.

"There we go yeah?" I whispered, stroking her hair and pulling it into a loose pony-tail. Her cheeks were still rubbed raw and moist from her tears that had been trickling all afternoon. She was reluctant but I managed to get her under the covers and proped up agaisnt the head board. She seemed so small in this tiny room. She was battling with the fear and the weakness that had been brought on with stress and lack of sleep.

"I'll be right back, keep those beautiful eyes open until I get back" I asked softly, she nodded weakly and followed me with her eyes as I walked out of the door. She looked so lost. My family were waiting eagerly at the bottom of the stairs - concern ripping through all of their features.

"How is she?" Esme asked tentatively at the bottom of the stairs. I couldn't hold onto my tears and they slowly trickled down my face. She was in so much pain and frightened. My mother cowered away from the truth. Alice whimpered and leant into Jasper. I shrugged and turned away from them without answering, I already had. I shook my tears away and chucked away my clothes and put some more on. Running back down to my broken Bella I didn't want to see her like that again but I couldn't leave her alone.

She looked just as depressed as I left. She tried to smile weakly but it barely reached her lips let alone her eyes.

"You're back" she whispered, trying to lift her arm to wave me closer to her.

"Of course I am, I'm not going to leave" I said snuggling under the covers with her. I shuffled her so she was lying down caged by my tight grip but facing me still. It really pained me to see my beautiful Bella so different, so crushed.

"IPod?" I asked and she nodded weakly and held it up to me. I shifted my weight so I could insert her earphones, her arms were trapped agaisnt my chest - her cold hands chilling through my vest top.

"You want to pick?" she asked me very softly, decisions at this time of night or at any time in her condition were not going to happen. I decided on something smooth and soft trying to sooth her some more. She shuffled her head further into my chest. I placed one of my hands on the back of her head and started to stroke wide circles through her hair. Her breathing slowed, and I started to relax more.

I was slowly falling into a light sleep when she started to stir. Her eyebrows furrowed and through her closed eyelashes her eyes started to water. She wriggled out of my hold and pushed herself further away. Her headphones pulled out of her ears and the pain increased in her forehead.

"Bella?" I whispered, reaching out with my fingertips agaisnt her cheekbones. She flinched away from my touch.

"No" she moaned, her hands wrapped around her waist, her fingernails dug into her sides.

"Bella?" I said more urgently. She turned away again and started whimpering, and churning her stomach and her body.

"Come on Bella, wake up" I whispered, outreaching for her again. A heart splitting scream erupted from her throat but her eyes never opened, they were screwed shut in agnoy. I outreached for her and grabbed her in my arms.

"Bella! Wake up!" I urged, pleading, she struggled agaisnt my hold. Whimpering and moaning.

"No, please, not again" she whispered, pulling agaisnt my arms.

"Bella, wake up, you have to wake up" she frantically rolled away from me, I let her go. I sat up in horror as her back arched in pain and she screamed a deafening scream again. Carlisle burst through the door, Alice closely behind.

"Help me Carlisle, help her please" I begged,shrugging of off the bed. My eyes never leaving Bella twisted up with pain. I basically crawled to Alice and she flung her arms around my neck pulling me into a protective hug.

"Why wont she wake up?" I cried into Alice's small shoulder. She patted me on the back, her own tears warming my shoulder. Carlisle rushed over to Bella's bedside. She was still crumpled with pain.

"I don't know Edward" Carlisle said softly.

"Can't we just throw water on her? Doesn't that work?" Alice panted, releasing me and hurrying over to Carlisle.

"I don't know, maybe" he stuttered, she convolted again and cried with pain.

"Do it please!" I cried, running back over to her, I grabbed her hand and intertwined my fingers tightly into hers. Alice ran out of the room and quickly returned with a jug full of water, without a second thought Alice threw the water over Bella. She was thrown into conciousness and her eyes flooded with tears.

"I'm so sorry" she cried hoarsely, holding her head in her hands. She grabbed at her throat because it had become so dry.

"No, shh, you're safe, you're safe now"


	37. Chapter 37 Peace

**EPOV**

She never went back to sleep that night. After she had woken up and apologised profusely she just stared out of the window. She was shaking furiously but wouldnt let me touch her. She told me once she gained more control to go to sleep and she could stay awake on her own. I didn't want to but soon enough I couldn't stop the sleep from taking me under. My sleep was restless as my subconcious worried over Bella just as much as my conciousness was. My eyes were never fully closed, they were searching for her. I saw her sitting catiously at the end of the bed, curled up in a blanket staring blankly out of the window.

I was barely aware of time passing, she looked as if she was frozen in time. I recognised as the weight shifted on the bed and my eyes flew open. Bella was crouching by her trunk and pulled it onto the bed and stir through it. Her eyes started to water but her smile pulled up at the edges, so I fell into a deeper more relaxed sleep.

.....

"Afternoon Edward" Bella whispered into my ear as I rolled onto my back, waking up slowly.

"Afternoon?" I questioned lightly, reaching out for her with my eyes still closed.

"Ohh yeah, it's one o'clock" she said casually, stroking my face lightly.

"One?! Why didn't you wake me?" I said, purely astounded. She had been so lost earlier and yet she can stay up throughout the whole day. I started to panic. She just sighed,

"Edward, please I had to let you sleep - you stayed up with me the whole night! I am not going to wake you up just to keep me company, I was fine - I painted a little; I can show you? Would that make you feel better? I don't want you to feel guilty, please" I finally opened my eyes and wished I didn't. My beautiful Bella was half the girl she had been just a day before. Her eyes had turned a dull brown and her skin had turned a light green. Underneath her eyes they had turned the deepest purple. I stroked the soft skin under her eyes and she dragged my hand to her neck and left it there.

"I didn't know what to do Bella, I tried - I'm sorry I couldn't help you" I started stroking her neck softly and she shook herself away from me and sat up again.

"Do I look that bad?" she asked quietly, trying to catch her reflection in the glass wall.

"No, Bella don't be so ridiculous - you look beautiful,come here" I said honestly, she was still my Bella just broken and really really tired. She wouldn't move, she flicked her eyes to me and my outreached hands, but quickly flicked back to look at herself again.

"Come here, please" I begged, reaching a little further to graze her arm with my fingertips. She turned back to me and smiled weakly.

"I'm sorry for being suck a freak" she muttered, crawling back to me and wriggling under my arm, I gripped her tightly around the shoulders and kissed her firmly on the forehead.

"You have been through so much my beautiful Bella. Beautiful, beautiful Bella. I love you Bella. I love you. You have not deserved all of that shit, you are not a freak. Please dont think of yourself that way. I would have thought I'd said that enough so you understand yet?" I pleaded, she looked up at me solomnly and then she smiled weakly again.

"It's just so hard Edward" she whispered and hugged herself tightly to me.

"I know, I know" I ushered into her ear. I pulled her back so I could kiss her softly on her sollen lips. I could see where she had tried to hold back her tears and crushed her lips together and she had picked at her lips with her perfect teeth, nerves and fears running through her.

"I love you Edward" she whispered agaisnt my lips. She closed her eyes and shuffled tighter to me again.

"Have you not been to sleep at all?" I asked after a long peaceful moment.

"Well, not since I woke up earlier" she replied sheepishly

"Bella, I know it's hard but you have to sleep someday" I replied carefully.

"I'm not tired" she replied flatly, I knew I wasn't going to get any more out of her. I could tell she was knackered, anybody could. Her breathing was so slow it worried me at times, her eyelids looked like they weighed a ton.

"Is anybody else home?" I asked once we decided to get up, well more like leave the bed, we weren't likely to get dressed. I wrapped her up tightly in the large duvet to make sure she wouldnt get cold.

"Umm, I'm not sure. I don't think that your family feel very comfortable around me anymore" she whimpered, heading towards the door - avoiding any reflection now.

"Bella, don't be silly" I rushed over to her and picked her up and held her tightly, and it was harder to get a grip because of the thick duvet.

"I was screaming Edward, convulting with pain... In my sleep! I wouldn't feel comfortable with me. I don't know how you can look at me the same"

"I was just scared for you Bella, they all were - they probably haven't come up because they thought _we _were sleeping. But no, it was only me" I joked at the end trying to lighten the dark mood. It seemed to work because she smirked and stuck her tongue out at me, once her tongue was back in her mouth I placed another feathery kiss on her lips.

"Let's go find out shall we" I said as I wandered clumsily out of the door along the corridor.

"It's silent" Bella whispered when we reached the stairs, she shuffled out of my hold and grabbed my hand weakly, tying her fingers in mine.

"Then why are you being so quiet!" I boomed away from her and laughed manically when it echoed around the empty house.

"You are hilarious" she spoke normally this time but her eyes were slowly peeking around the house incase my family jumped out at her. At least, that's what I hoped she was looking out for.

"Breakfast?" I suggested as we reached the bottom of the stairs, not feeling very hungry myself but knowing that she hadn't eaten properly in over tweleve hours made me nervous.

"No thank you, I'm not that hungry. And it's past lunchtime so there is no way you can call it breakfast anymore" she countered, true I had forgotten about the time.

"Well, what would you like to do then?" I asked, trying to find something to occupy her mind.

"Um, I don't mind" she answered cowering into my chest, snuggling her warm self there.

"Do you want to paint?" I asked resting my chin on her head, she giggled as my chin wobbled agaisnt her.

"No" she said flatly and slightly defensive. I pulled back to look at her confused and she shrugged away my look and cuddled back into me.

"Why don't you play the piano? You haven't in so long" she whispered, tiptoeing to look at me in the eyes; pleading me not to ask about the painting issue. I thought the piano over and decided that it was true that I hadn't played in forever.

"Come on then" I said as I tugged on her arm, pulling her into my side as we walked into my room. Well it isn't really mine, but I like to think of it like that.

I took my seat on the piano stool and admired the keys as I gently lifted the lid. I noticed that Bella had positioned herself behind me rolled up in the duvet. I turned to look at her and she smiled properly this time and urged me on with and impatient hand wave. I laughed and turned back to my wonderful piano.

I let my fingertips pick the song I was going to play. I rushed my fingers lightly over the keys and let them stay there. I started to play Bella's song that I had written when she was here those first two weeks. She lit my soul alive, and inspiration poured over me. This song was for her and she noticed when I reached the third bar, I heard her intake a sharp breath and then she relaxed and in my side vision I saw her gently sway as the melody filled the room.

I played for three minutes before I noticed that Bella's eyes were closed tight shut, her breathing was light and not strained as it had been last night. She was sleeping. She strecthed her limbs and balled her hands like a cat before rolling back into herself and relaxing again. I stopped playing and watched her for a couple of minutes but I quickly noticed the staggered increase in her breaths, her eyelids started to fluttler. I quickly started playing again, her beautiful song started to vibrate through the room again and Bella calmed almost automatically. Bella's lullaby, I thought to myself and beamed a bright smile continued to play. I would play all day until my fingers bled if Bella was at peace in her sleep.

**BPOV**

When Edward started playing the song he had written for me so long ago now I started to relax. Letting the beautiful notes stringed together by the soft gentle movemnts of his strong fingers.

My dream was not torn by Phil's image like it was last night. I dread to think about what happened last night. I was very aware of my surroundings but I couldn't wake up. He was trapping me there. I could see how upset Edward was and how revolted he was at me. I tried to jump up and down to get out of my nightmare.

_He chased and chased and then he found Edward in the middle of our meadow. He changed his direction for him and I screamed and screamed to get his attention. He wouldn't change his line of sight; he didn't even notice me anymore. I ran at him when he was starting to get close. _

_"HERE! Come here, take me!" I screamed at him, he flicked now and ran towards me. Edward was still as stone and he vanished as soon as Phil came into my vision - like he was the dream instead of Phil._

I was torn, I wanted to escape the pain that Phil was inflicting on me but I didn't want to wake up to find that Edward wasn't actually there with me. I wanted to be awake in the reality that I had known but it all blurred together and I screamed in frustration and in pain as he ripped at me.

After I had woken up I was relieved, I saw Edward but he was scared. Carlisle was so awkward and Alice stood in shock and quickly hurried out of the room. I just stared at Edward's broken face, horrified at myself that I could cause so much pain to a family that shouldn't feel pain.

Edward's music filled my body and sent me into a blissful and peaceful sleep. I dreamt of Edward and myself in our meadow, and it was warm - the middle of summer. The sun was high in the sky and beamed down onto us. Every note Edward made was a burst of light in the meadow, some green, some blues and purples, little fireworks going off around the two of us. It was so peaceful, but then I realised that Edward was still playing. He was playing for me, his fingers would go numb and bruise if I slept as long as he had last night. I woke up slowly, only because I couldn't make myself go any faster.

Edward jumped from his stool to my side, "No, you were asleep!" he moaned as he stroked my face. I was struggling upwards to sit up to look at his gorgeous face properly.

"I've slept wonderfully thanks to you" I whispered, pulling him closer. I concentrated on his eyes for a moment - but seeing my reflection, I looked a little better, the purple was a little lighter and my mudd eyes had turned more bark coloured.

"But Bella, I've only been playing for about 15 minutes" he moaned, unravelling the covers and tucking himself into them and shuffling me so I was sitting on his lap.

"Edward, you were not where I was when I was asleep. I feel like I've just slept for about eight hours" I lied a little, it was really more like five hours but I didn't want him to feel bad.

"Eight hours?"

"Edward, don't make me say it" I whispered, shuffling my head into the cave of his neck.

"Eight hours with me?" He guessed, I nodded against his neck and he chuckled lightly.

"And he wasn't there?" He asked carefully, stroking the back of my neck through my hair.

"No Edward, I was safe. I was with you, I was safe and warm and totally awake, as I am now"

"Oh Bella, I'm going to have to record myself aren't I?" he asked pulling me back slightly to gaze at me.

"I was just getting used to noctornal"


	38. Chapter 38 Nowhere

**BPOV  
**

Instead of attacking my dreams as Phil had once done he just flickered across them. After the first day of my suspension, and the first night... He just ran across the normal perfect dreams of Edward and myself. I would be sitting with Edward in my meadow and in a deep dark corner of the forest Phil was crouching like a vicious animal waiting to attack as soon as my attention was turned again. These dreams hadn't made me scream, they just ran deep shivers down my spine making my skin crawl.

For the past week Edward had still been so protective and caring. He looked over me as I did anything. Making sure that I wasn't hyperventalating or something. Well, I had come pretty close on the first day. And he was scared that I would run when he wasn't looking; which is what I should have done. Taken the danger as far away from this adoring family as I could.

"Bella?" Edward whispered to me. We were up in his room, just lying in eachothers arms. I was allowed back to school tomorrow and Edward was more anxious about it than I was. I mumbled a yes and stretched my lips to kiss him featherly on his bare collar bone.

"You know we don't have to go to school if you didn't want to" he murmered, pulling me up to look him in his wonderful eyes. I saw his hesitation and worry deep within them.

"Edward, I would love it if we could spend weeks and weeks and weeks on end in your wonderful house but I don't think Esme or Carlisle or the school would appricate that, do you?"

"I supose not" he grumbled, looking away from me.

"Hey, what have I done?" I questioned, panicking slightly - well actually alot even though his hands were still wrapped around my back.

"It's nothing really" he mumbled, resisting the pull to look up at me.

"Edward" I moaned and reached out for his face with a delicate touch, his eyes lifted and stared into mine but I still couldn't find the answers.

"You called it your house, not our home. You live here Bella. It's _your _home too" he said quietly. I stroked my hand lightly agaisnt his cheek where my hand was already resting. He smiled a little bit. I decided to take him on a short tour. I wiggled out of the covers and pulled him up.

"Where are we going?" he questioned very confused.

"Well I thought that I'd give you a tour around my house? Sound good to you?" I smiled widely as his smile grew and he wound his fingers into mine. I skipped down the hall to my studio. I dramatically waved the door open and he stiffled a laugh.

"This room is one of my favourites" I explained, "the wonderful, lovely people I live with made it for me to make me feel welcome and part of the family. And it worked _very _well" I emphased as I dragged him back out of the room. Gliding down the two flights of stairs I turned back to see Edward with a very adorable confused expression.

I turned to the kitchen and pulled open the fridge door, "And this here, where I consume mass amounts of milk. And sometimes I try and teach this very handsome boy how to cook" I pulled him in closer and whispered "Don't tell anyone but I have a bit of a thing for him" he laughed and lifted my chin with his strong index finger and filled the small space between us with his lips.

"Show him to me, I'll take him down" he joked and kissed me again. We were only kissing lightly but every touch took my breath away. We parted for air and he breathed a light relieved laugh and nodded me to continue my tour. I skipped up the stairs letting him follow me this time. I took him to my bedroom

"This is another one of my favourite places," I turned to smile at him, "You know that boy I was talking about, he likes it here too"

"Does he now?" Edward mocked, dragging me towards the bed and under the covers.

"Yeah" I mumbled into his chest.

"Well, I can see why" He mumbled back to me, kissing my forehead lightly.

"Sleep now Bella, we have a big, big day tomorrow"

"Big, big?" I mocked sleepishly, he pressed his lips to my forehead again,

"Yes Bella, big big - now iPod you'll regret another sleepless night I promise you"

"Okay, I believe you Edward. Night, night"

"I love you Bella, sleep now"

........

"Bella?" Edward's beautiful voice lulled me from the strange nights I've been suffering from.

"Edward, did you wake up before me?"

"No, the alarm. I don't like you waking up on your own" he moaned into my neck leaving a little kiss underneath my jaw.

"Well, it's okay with me" I mumbled, pulling myself upwards and placing my hands lightly on his cheeks. I reached out the small gap between us to kiss him lightly again, only this morning he seemed determined to distract me. He held me agaisnt the passionate kiss running one hand down my back and curving under my bottom and pulled me upwards to wrap my legs around him. He let out an enticing sigh of air as he rolled onto his back pulling me with him so I was ontop of him.

"Edward, we can't. Not now" I breathed as he started to trail kisses down my neck. He sighed again and raised his elbows so he could lean on them, balancing myself on him still.

"We could miss another week of school, if you wanted?" He asked gently, brushing the light blush that had formed on my cheeks during the short heated moment.

"We can't Edward, I know that you don't need more education - but it wouldn't harm me" I said, suddenly thinking about all the things that could harm me. I pushed those thoughts aside quickly, hoping that Edward hadn't seen the panic that had suddenly drowned me - he had done very well to preoccupy my mind of late and I cherished the fact that I am still a hormone ridden teenager whos every whim relies on the present form of another.

"Are you sure you're ready Bella?" he asked carefully, pulling us up further so we were upright - letting the duvet fall around us, making me suddenly cold as icy thoughts shivered up my spine, luckily his hand was there to stop the cold racing higher than my neck because he was tracing his finger lightly around my neck.

"Pffft, of course I'm ready. You've helped a lot Edward but I think I am going to succomb to cabin fever" I mocked lightly, rolling of off him and the bed and making my way to my wardrobe.

"Bella, don't do that" he moaned, I turned back to him, confusion scattered across my face.

"Do wha-" he quickly interuppted me.

"Don't joke like that. Bella you haven't even been outside - you wont even look outside" his voice was louder than before.

"I have..." I mumbled turning back to my wardrobe, inspecting it mindlessly. I hadn't been outside, I didn't want to go outside. I didn't know what was outside.

"Don't push yourself for me Bella, and don't try to lie to me" I heard him getting out of bed softly and walking towards me. I childishly pushed myself further into the wardrobe.

"I'm not Edward, I'm ready" I mumbled again, trying to refocus myself on finding an outfit that said 'screw you, I don't care what any of you say' to wear to school today.

"Oh come on Bella, you know thats not true. You haven't even picked up a colouring pencil! Don't tell me that you have - I didn't mention it that first day but I know that you haven't painted or drawn anything"

"Thats different" I said more clearly. Getting defensive.

"No its not. Bella, look I-" This time I interupted him,

"No you look Edward, I'm not doing this now. I'm going to school - you can stay here all you want. I'll do this without you, I can do this, I have to do this." I said without turning to him. My tears threatening to spill over, but my voice was stronger.

"Bella" he moaned, reaching out to touch me gently on the arm but I flinched away from his touch.

"Fine Bella, fine - do what ever the you want!" he yelled and stormed from the room, slamming the door agaisnt wall - making several frames fall and shatter agaisnt the floor.

**EPOV  
**

"Fine Bella, fine - do what ever the you want!" I yelled at her, I couldn't take it. I saw her flinch away from my anger and her body convulted in fear as I slammed the door agaisnt the wall. I heard some frames fall and crash loudly agaisnt the floor. I knew I had woken the rest of the family up. I heard footsteps and doors creaking open as I ran up to my room, even over the frantic beating of my heart and the harsh uneven breaths that barely filled my lungs that flooded my ears. I threw the door shut and the hinges screamed. I fell back agaisnt the door and tried to steady my breathing. I heard movement downstairs, lots of movement. I heard more doors. I heard stumbling down the stairs and I waited to hear the fridge door open and a the silent squeak of a chair agaisnt the floor - but it didn't happen. I didn't hear the fridge, I didnt hear the chair.

I heard nothing.

Suddenly it seemed like thousands of feet were running up to my room, I couldn't move. Bangs of thunder shuddered agaisnt my back as they tried to open the door.

"EDWARD!" Alice screeched through the door.

"Open the door son" Carlisle tried to hold in his voice and keep it calm but panic slowly filtered through. I stood away from the door and let it fall open, I stared back at my whole family, their faces were all pained and confused.

"What did you do?" Alice screeched at me and ran towards to me and scratched my face in a angry slap.

"I didn't do anything, she doesn't listen!" I screamed back at her. At Esme cringed agaisnt Carlisle as Alice hit me again.

"Shes gone!" Alice shrieked, and crumbled back to Jasper.

"What... what do you mean she's gone?" I stumbled over all words, they flooded my mind.

"Shes left, she running away again" Carlisle mumbled, not even able to look at me.

"No, she'll come back right? Her stuff - this is her home now. She can't leave, can she?" I struggled out again, breathing was becoming difficult. Carlisle shook his head and Alice unleashed herself again.

"'Do what ever the you want'" Alice yelled, "What do you think she wants to do the most Edward?! The one thing that you kept her from doing - you might as well have pushed her out of the door into him! How could you!" She ran up to me, and hit me again, her nails caught me deep and I felt something warm trickle down my face.

"How could you Edward?" Alice whimpered, now wrapping her arms around my neck. I clenched my jaw tight because if I let it open my control would escape and I would explode.

My thoughts stopped, and I didn't feel my heart beat. Bella had it - and she was gone. I couldn't hold it in anymore and dropped my hold from Alice, fell to my knees and screamed, begging her to hear and come and save me, give my heart a reason to beat - long enough for me to apologise, long enough so I could memorise everything about her, long enough to tell her I love her. Just long enough and she could take it - I don't deserve it anymore.


	39. Chapter 39 Hiding

**BPOV**

I fell to the floor after he left. I stared at the space where he should have been. I wanted to scream, to shout how sorry I was for making him so angry. But all I saw when I replayed the scene in my head was Phil. Edward was right, Phil hadn't come to get me. Instead he got inside my head and ruined everything. He was so far away and was still ripping my world apart. In my new home. No this wasn't my home. It was never meant to be. I don't belong here.

Of course I don't.

What ever the I like. I would run, I would run away again. Take the pain away. Take the danger away from the family that would never be mine and I was foolish to ever think that I could become apart of it.

Of course I couldn't.

Stupid Bella! I screamed at myself inwardly. I heard Edwards frantic footsteps run up to his room and slam the door shut. He didn't care anymore, how stupid to fall in love. Was it love, or was it just pity? I wouldn't care anymore. I frantically ran around the room, I piled all of my things into my old duffle bag - being careful to take as little as they had given me: I didn't deserve it. I took out the photos of Charlie and put them back into the trunk and I tried to shove more of my things in there too. I could take that much. I was about to run out of the room when my foot crunched on some glass beneath me, I looked closer down to inspect it. Beneath the glass was a perfect picture of Edward and myself, it was from our first date. I was tight in his embrace and his smile radiated like the thousands of lights he had put up for me, I was looking up at him with a smile equally as big, my eyes were bright and happy. I struggled not to take it, but I ran out of the room anyway.

I saw the lovely family in the very corner of my side vision as I stumbled down the stairs in the rush with a giant trunk and a small duffle bag. None of them said anything, they all quickly followed me down the stairs but I ran quickly and they didn't know what to do. I turned and looked at them as I silently opened the front door. I couldn't focus on a single face, they all merged together but I could still see how beautiful they were. They were across the room from me and they wouldn't be able to catch me before I reached the end of the driveway.

"Bella" Alice whispered as I closed the door behind me. I sighed loudly and waited for a small second.

"Thank you" I whispered back, so low that I knew they couldn't here. I started to run away from their house and I heard them rush up the stairs and now I begged inwardly that I had the balls to steal a car, but I couldn't do that to them. I would get further away, but they do not deserve that. I had reached the end of the drive and was surprised I had only tripped twice and was still on my feet. I didn't dare slow though, not that Edward would want to come after me.

I heard a deafening scream from the house, that made me stop instantly. Edward. It continued, he wailed and wailed. I couldn't turn. Maybe it was a scream of joy? I could imagine the tears running down his face, his face crumpled with pain. I went numb. It was like my heart had stopped beating, the blood in my veins slowed to a stop, I doubt that it would ever start again. But I was glad, maybe the pain would stop. Maybe if Phil found me - he wouldn't be able to hurt me.

I don't know why I didn't hitch-hike once I reached the main roads. I should have, I would have gotten away much quicker. There was something about the irony that Edward got what he wanted, I wasn't at school today - I probably would never go back. I wonder whether they would go to school and pretend like everything was normal, back to how everything was before I was even there. Before I came and complicated their perfect lives. At times I used to hate and envy families like the Cullens - so perfeclty beautiful, so rich and I had nothing. I still have nothing, nothing has changed.

I had slowed to a walk now, I was tired and I craved some food. But over all emotions of needs and wants I needed Edward. I wanted Edward. His scream echoed in my mind. I did that. Did he want me back?

Think logically Bella, you can do that at least. _Clearly not very well. _Okay, food. I have no money, no means of getting any money. I can't do this again - I have no money left. I have nothing left. I decided to focus on the tired and I shrugged myself a little way into the lines of the trees, sleeping on the actual side of the road demanded too much attention - especially in such a small town like Forks attention is not what you want. Not that I ever wanted any attention, _what did you want them? _I questioned myself endlessly.

I wanted secruity, I wanted safety, I wanted away from Phil, away from my past. I wanted happiness, and once I had met him I wanted Edward.

I placed my trunk delicatley on the moist ground and rested my duffle bag agaisnt it. I then flumped my head down onto the converted pillow and wrestled with my mind hoping that sleep would win. I don't normally pray for sleep, it was unknown - but now everything was unknown, and unpredictable. I looked upwards through the canopy of trees and found myself wishing that I had brought the camera that they had given me, or the sketchbooks and the colours. One clear thought dashed through my mind while I was aimlessly wishing for material possessions. My iPod, old or new - I didn't have one. No music, no Edward, no dulling of the mind. My subconcious would rule my night, my peaceful darkness, it would rule my fears. I would become a slave to the hell my memories created, I wished then I could be stoned, fed to the lions without a sword. I don't want to my the court jester to my mind, hang me at noon. Save me from myself, save my dead heart, I begged myself but I knew it would come to no avail. My mind would do what it liked, Edward wasn't speaking to me when he screamed that at me. He was speaking to my subconcious, do what you like. My mind would like to treat me how I deserve. To be trodden on, to be there only for somebodies amusement. To suffer.

**EPOV**

Tear of my head and stake me, feed me to the lions, to the bears. Throw me to death. I deserve nothing less and certainly nothing more. After my throat grew so dry I couldn't scream anymore, my family didn'tknow what to do. They stared down at me with horror, shock, sadness, pain, sympathy. Sympathy of which I did not deserve. Bella, it pained me to even think her name - guilt ripped through the place where my heart should be.

"I need to get her back" I whimpered, pulling at my throat - demanding more authority, more action.

"Shes gone Edward, she'll be too far to find" Rosalie said soflty, gliding herself through the crowd and wrapping an arm across Alice's shrunken shoulders.

"I'll find her" I moaned, slowly getting up.

"You wont be able to Edward" Esme whispered, outreaching silently with her hand - gesturing for me to go to her and be comforted.

"I _need _to find her - why don't you understand? I must find her" I tried to yell, to get them to listen. I went to struggle through them but they just parted for me, I grabbed some jeans and my car keys and got dressed on the way hallway to the next set of stairs. I pulled myself to take a look into her room. I pushed lightly the door open and stood in horror - her room was a mess. I took a small step into the room and crunched a small fraction of glass beneath under my feet.

I leant down to look closer, one of the frames I had knocked down earlier in my anger. It was a beautiful picture - the one of our first date. A shameful fact that it had taken me so long to give her all the she deserved. She looked so beautiful, her skin was pure and glowing. Her lovely lips stretched in a large smile revealing her perfect teeth. Her eyes looked up at my with adoration and caring, they shined with the lights of the fairylights. Her dark hair flowed flawlessly behind her. Her slim legs flowed from the end of her stunning dress, the blue of the dress bounced off of her skin and made her a bit more perfect - if that was possible.

I had to get her back, what other choice did I have. I picked up the picture and shook any glass that was still attatched and folded the picture gently and put it in my jeans pocket. I raced down the stairs and into my car. The driveway faded quickly and I saw the collective huddle of my family watch me as I sped away from the house. It wasn't my home if Bella wasn't there.

I drove through Forks about ten different ways when I started to wonder whether she would of gotten in somebodies car. But shes been here too long, no body would pick her up and not say something. She probably didn't get a lift anywhere. Maybe she's resting? Or walking in the woods. I made a rash decision and did a U-turn so I could park up agaisnt the tree lines. I parked roughly, locked the car and started jogging along the line of the forest. Would she ran if I called? Would I be able to catch her? I needed to find her.

"Bella!" I yelled into the woods, the birds flew around frantically as I woke them and I tried not to get distracted and kept yelling her name over and over until I saw her or she replied.

"Please!"

**BPOV**

I heard the frantic fluttering of birds wings and I suddenly wondered where the trouble was. I sat up from my peaceful posture to upright and focusing my senses to hear or see if something was coming. I tried to follow from where a few slow birds were coming from, they were coming from the west. I looked down and squinted through the trees, I couldn't see anything. Maybe the birds were just having a race? _Oh yeah. that'd be it _my mind mocked.

I decided to rest again, nothing could hurt me now - I persuaded myself. I leant back agaisnt my make-shift pillow and closed my eyes but only to block out the beautiful landscape that was distracting me from listening to everything. I re-focused my hearing and heard little bugs scattering across the woody ground. Suddenly I heard a far away voice, it was faint so I couldn't work out what they were saying. I stayed very still for a short moment strainging to hear clearer.

"Bella!" It was Edward, his voice was soar but I could tell it was him. I sprang up from my position and grabbed my things and started to wind my way through the woods. I was careful not to run because I was destined to trip but I was careful not to lose my pace or else he would be able to see or catch me. But he was still coming in the same direction.

"Please Bella?!" He whined again, I resisted the deep urge to run back to him. This wasn't like before; this was for real. I was leaving, I had left. He wasn't meant to come back for me.

"Are you even here?" He moaned, but he continued. His persistence baffled me, the millions of forests around Forks and he was able to chose the one bit of forest I was in. How did he know that I hadn't hitch-hiked like I should have. Why did he continue to look through the same place where I could be anywhere.

"Look, I don't know if your here. For all I know you got a bus. Why am I even saying this?!" He yelled desperately.

"Please, some body - whoever is anywhere, controlling what we do, or overseeing this you have to understand" He whimpered again, subconciously I was slowing.

"Who ever you are, you need to know - if you can't see already. I love her!" He yelled,

"I _love _her! I say it a lot, I try to convince her of how undying my love is for her. But I would never say it in vain. I love her more than I love anything else in the world. When she is near me it makes my heart ache because its like my chest isn't big enough. I didn't know that such a love could exsist. But I know it now. I want her back, I want to keep her safe. Please, just bring her back to me" He begged, my eyes were spilling over and my breathing was starting to stagger.

"I can't breath without her, I can't think about anything but her. I've done wrong, so wrong - give me a chance to make it up to you. Let me protect her, let me breath. I feel like my heart isn't where it should be. Its not in me, and it should be with her but it doesn't feel like she has it either. Its like my heart is drifting around in some sort of space vaccum, not knowing how to get to me or to her. And it isn't beating, where ever it is, its paused in time. I wish time would stop, everything would just stop so I could trace her all the way around the world so I could find her. I need her back more than anything. This isn't just some teenage crush, actually I don't even care if it is - because it is real to me. She is real, we are real. My love for her is real, and its all I know now. Just give her back to me please"

I tripped on a large root falling flat on my face, I moaned lightly as I tried to drag myself upwards. I slowly got up and hit my head agaisnt a low branch.

"Shit" I murmered to myself and clasped my hand over my mouth, trying hard not to let my yelp of pain escape my mouth. I stumbled backwards over my trunk and fell again. Falling onto a large twig. _Crack__. _I looked around frantically and suddenly I could see him. His head had spun in my direction even though he couldn't see me yet but he was still walking this way. His pace quickened as I struggled upwards and grabbed my stuff. I started to hurl myself through the woods, but the new panic made me fall more and more. My arms were flinging themselves out at my sides and my trunk hit a tree hard and threw open the contents.

I scrambled around, picking up everything I could but I heard his footsteps getting too close, he was running and quickly. Soon he would be able to see me and then I would be done.

"Come on, come on" I mumbled to myself as I was collected my scattered memories.

"Bella!" He yelled, I turned in the direction of his voice - I couldn't tell anymore if he could see me. I picked up what was left, rammed it into my trunk and started to run again. My legs turned into led and my breathing was so heavy it felt like I was drowning. I daren't turn around again, I couldn't catch a glimpse of his face: I would stop in my tracks. I fell again to my knees and scratched my face against the bark of a 'helpful' tree that broke my fall.

"You missed one Bella" Edward whimpered as he slowed to a stop beside me. He bent over panting for breath as he chucked a folded picture to me. I didn't outreach for it - it merely fell open under my eyes. It was the picture that had been shattered on the floor. We looked like we fit together, I thought we had, but I had been foolish - even though her had folded it he had not folded it through the middle, so we weren't seperated by a crease.

"Bella, I'm so so sorry" he whimpered, sitting down with his knees up and his arms resting across them, leaning agaisnt the opposite tree. I positioned myself to sit cross legged facing him, leaning against the tree that had just scratched me. He looked towards the scratch on my face and I wiped away any blood and muck with the edge of my selve. After I was done, I pointed to his new scratches on his face and he sighed and looked away.

"Alice" he mumbled and looked back up to me, his eyes were tired and digging into my own.

"What were you going to do?" he questioned lightly, after a few minutes of silence. His breathing had returned to normal but his voice was still soar.

"I was just going to run" I replied sheepishly, I looked down shyly - like a child being told 'no you can't have the last cooke' taking it anyway and not expecting any punishment and trying to lie with cookie mush all over your face.

"But where?" He questioned still,

"Anywhere" I said flatly, he pushed his head backwards so he was looking up at the trees.

"I bet you really wanted your camera didn't you?" He asked, pulling his eyes back to me. I nodded subtley and let my eyes fall back to his.

"It is a lot easier to miss what you never had" I mumbled, studying my dirty hands. He laughed a short laugh, it was relieved.

"Would you please come back with me? Where you belong, please?" He asked in a soft voice, pleading with me.

"I dont know" I said, shaking my head slowly. He didn't move forward but he sighed loudly and rushed one of his hands through his gorgeous hair.

"I'll beg if you want me to?" He said seriously, holding the bridge of his nose inbetween his fingers.

"I don't want you to beg Edward" I mumbled

"You heard me didn't you? What I said about you earlier?" He asked softly, I don't think he could get any louder anymore. I nodded again, not trusting my voice.

"I believe in something now, I don't know what answered my pleading. But something did. So I believe that something somewhere knows that we should be together just as much as you or I do, you will come back - I can feel it. And I can wait it out just as long as you can" He said steadily, he looked so sincere. I felt it too, the logic could not cover this anymore.

"Do you feel it too Bella?" He asked, finally breaking away from his rest on the tree and shuffling towards me.

"Yu-huh" I mumbled, outreaching my hand for his. He obligied and scrambled towards me faster.

"So are you coming back now or are we going to freeze and starve first?" He asked, stroking my wild hair out of my face.

"Edward, I... I can't" I mumbled, struggling to find it in me to argue - but there was a reason I was running away again.

"No. Come on Bella!" He tried to raise his voice but it failed him,

"Okay, please, please just don't get angry with me again" I begged quickly, shying away from his face and his sorry eyes.

"Oh, oh Bella" He whispered, pulling me closer to him and wrapping his long arms around me, holding me close and rocking me slightly.

"I'm so, so, so, so sorry. I didn't mean to get angry and scare you - oh Bella" He ushered to me, stroking my hair methodically.

"I'm sorry I made you angry" I whimpered into his neck. He chuckled lightly making me shake and laugh as well.

"I love you Bella, I really don't think you grasp just how much I really do" He pulled me back and looked deeply into my eyes.

"Edward, I love you more; so I can grasp - but I can think that you're love for me is silly"

"Darling Bella, no" He said bluntly, but with humour in his cheeks and lips. He pressed his index finger lightly agaisnt my lips as I was about to protest and he featherly kissed my lips. He bent his forehead so he was resting agaisnt mine and our lips were inches apart.

"One times more than you can ever say" I mumbled,

"Pardon?" He asked softly,

"I love you one times more than you can ever say" I laughed as he pulled such an adorable sulky face.

"Just promise me one thing please?" He asked carefully, I nodded slowly, making him laugh as my nodding scrunched up his forehead with the movement.

"Never leave me, ever again okay?" He said seriously, my tears were threatening to overflow but I managed to control them. He pulled away from my head and looked my in the eyes, inspecting me.

"I promise" I said with a wide smile, and he mimicked my smile.

"Promise, promise?" He mocked lightly, I nodded again, to emphase.

"Hey, how come you don't have to promise?" I questioned with my eyebrows raised,

"Well firstly because I've never tried to leave before - and why would I ever, ever want to leave such a beautiful, perfect girl?" He spoke quietly but his words echoed around my ears.

"Hmph" I moaned,

"I promise Bella I will never, ever, ever even dream of leaving you" He whispered onto my lips.

**EPOV**

When I found her, my heart flew back into place. I didn't know whether I could make her come back, I didn't know what she would say to me. But to see her own more time, to be able to see her beauty just one more time, to hear her voice one more time - to even have her yell at me. I would have taken it all just to see her.

But I found her or she was sent to me or I was led to her, I don't care how it happened but I found her. Everything was in sync - like the world had stop spinning but Bella and myself being together put the world back in motion: I know that sounds very dramatic but its what it felt like. We walked back to my car slowly, she demanded that she carry the very heavy trunk but I still was allowed to carry her tiny duffle bag.

"I ended up missing school anyway" She mocked lightly as dropped her trunk in the back and slipped into the front seat next to me. I looked at her sincerely and she looked at me catiously.

"And what a better way to prove you are ready for going outside" I mocked back, reaching for her hand reasuring her that I wasn't going to get mad. She smiled lightly and looked back at me and she looked relieved. We drove back making small talk about the poor music that was on the radio and settled for putting my iPod on shuffle and then discussing that too. We got home quickly and wandered slowly into the house, her still carrying her massive trunk and me with her duffle bag.

My family were all gone and the house was empty so we took her things up to her room and we tided quickly. She flumped back down on the bed and I crawled back to her and held her closely to me.

"Can we make an agreement together?" She asked softly, snuggling into me, draping her legs over mine.

"Of course we can Bella" I ushered, stroking her beautiful soft hair,

"Can we like never argue again - it really hurts"

"We can try, but everybody does now and again. And I know it hurts - it was like my heart was missing Bella" I answered and she sniffled quietly.

"Same" she murmered, "Edward, I love you, love you like I don't know, like somebody who really, really, really, loves something loves something - does that make any sense?" she mumbled adorably.

"I love you too Bella"

"And we are both going to school tomorrow"

**I am so, so sorry if my writing is getting a little sloppy - I'm really struggling without word but I'm getting rather into it again so it just flows :) Sorry again, it'll get better soon x**


	40. Chapter 40 Better

**BPOV  
**

Edward's family came home gradually, they all made me swear that I would never run away again, not from them. I promised twice over that I wouldn't even think about running away again. I swear they would have made me a contract to sign if Edward would have let go of my writing hand. Emmett joked that they should put me on a lead, which was amusing for the _whole _family. Well, other than Edward who had become even more protective and gritted his teeth thinking that Emmett had implied that I was a dog. Luckily I had Edward's hand in a firm grip so he couldn't run at Emmett before he had a chance to explain.

When it was time for bed, after an exhausting day, I had a quick shower whilst Edward was getting ready for bed. I was out quickly and met him waiting in my bedroom.

"You are so stunning Bella" he murmered as I wandered to my wardrobe and got myself into some comfy warm pajamas.

"Flattery will only get you so far Edward" I mocked as I plaited my hair in the mirror, watching him on my bed in the reflection.

"I am telling the truth, I swear it" He crossed his fingers across his heart and I giggled lightly, walking over to him.

"Its sweet of you to say though Edward" I said lightly, crawling onto his lap, he was leaning agaisnt the headboard and he turned me so my back was pushed up agaisnt his broad chest.

"Bella" He moaned, "I'm not just saying it, and I'm not lying - I wish that you could see yourself the way others do" He said placing a soft kiss on my bare shoulder.

"Oh come on Edward, I'm no Rosalie or Alice" I retorted, turning my face slightly to see his beautiful features better. "You are much prettier than me" I moaned, delicately tracing his features with the tip of my index finger. When I reached his lips he tried to catch my finger in his lips, making me giggle again.

"Let me tell you about beauty Bella" He whispered into my neck and flipped me around so I was facing him, "I think that beauty is what you can't describe. When you see something truly, truly beautiful you have such a draw to it that you can't find the words to pin-point why or how something could be so beautiful. Beauty isn't a science Bella, its not something you can analyse. Its what springs on you when you least expect it, its when you have so many emotions and feelings that swirl around in your head trying to explain why what you're looking at is so beautiful and just not being able to. You Bella are beautiful" He rattled off this speech like he had been learning it since he was able to speak, like he had been searching for such a beauty but he couldn't find it.

"Oh and I'd rather be called handsome, sounds a lot more manly than pretty" He mocked and kissed me quickly on the lips. I pulled away to breath,

"Hmm, getting picky are we?" I mocked back, kissing him before he got to reply.

"I'll take whatever you want to give me Bella" He murmemed pulling back again before kissing me fiercely again. It didn't take long until we had to part for breath,

"Have I ever told you what I thought when I first saw you?" He asked gently, while settling us down into a position ready for sleep.

"No, I don't think so" I replied into his chest, letting my fingers sketch patterns across his chest and arms, where my fingers were too cold he shivered beneath me but urged me to continue.

"Do I want to know?" I asked carefully, I didn't want to know if he thought I was some homeless weirdo, no that wouldn't be fun. He chuckled beneath me, shaking the whole bed.

"Bella, I didn't think you were homeless - you really shocked me with that one" He chuckled again, stroking my cheek softly

"I thought you were the most dazzling girl I'd ever seen. I remember it so clearly, like it was a week ago"

"You sound like we are an old married couple Edward, I have only been here for two months give or take"

"And what a magical two months give or take they have been, now are you going to let me finished" He 'moaned'.

"Okay" I whined like a child, and snuggled closer to him wrapping my arms across his chest.

"Well, like I said - you looked incredible. It was like everything around Forks was painted in a dull grey and then you just popped into view and everything changed. I don't think I can describe how instantly attracted to you I was. There was like this tug on me to go to you,"

"And you did, and scared the living daylights out of me" I interrupted again but he just laughed again,

"I did, sorry about that by the way" He apologised, but this time I laughed

"Its okay, your voice was the first time I felt safe. I felt like everything was going to be okay and I ignored the logic that told me that it wasn't going to last because I didn't care as long as it lasted a little bit" I remembered, pulling my face up and looking into his eyes.

"You made me come alive again Bella" he murmered, raising one hand to my neck, stroking softly.

"You let me live Edward" I whispered. We were lost to our teenage lust again, not that anybody was complaining - sleep could wait.

**EPOV**

I would never tire of waking up next to Bella. She was sitting upright in bed and had her sketch book and colours infront of her. It was good to see her with them again, she hadn't notice me wake up so I edged slowly closer to her to get a peek at what she was drawing.

"Not yet Edward, I'm not done" She ordered without even turning to me.

"How do you do that?" I asked in disbelieve, sitting up next to her but she turned the book away from me.

"Its a skill" She mocked, still not lifting her head from the book.

"Well, good morning all the same" I mumbled, looking around for my top so I could run upstairs to get dressed.

"Nu-uh, come here Eddie" She moaned,

"Eddie?" I turned to look at her horrified at what she just called me.

"Sorry, just Emmett calls you it alot" She hid beneath her book, peeking over the top to see me - she was absolutely adorable but what self-respecting seventeen year old wants to be called Eddie?

"Does that mean I get to call you Bellie?" She dropped the book fractionally, careful to avoid my peering eyes.

"Umm, I um, not really" She mumbled,

"Then no Eddie" I debated, she sighed but waggled her finger at me anyway. I obligied and ran around the bed to kiss her passionatly on the lips, she flipped her book over and dropped it, moving her hands up to tangle in my hair - that drove me wild. My senses were static and I picked her up and she wrapped her tiny legs around me. I ran hot kisses down her neck,

"Edward" She moaned and I brought my attention back up to her eyes, she kissed me lightly on the lips with sympathetic eyes.

"I hate school" I mumbled, placing her carefully down and stomping out of the room childishly. I heard her giggle adorably and I heard her fall back with a soft plump onto her bed. I chucked on a dark blue t-shirt and a light grey hoodie some jeans and rushed back down to meet Bella, I decided to check her bedroom first because she has become more fussy about what she is wearing, I think she looks stunning in whatever she wears.

"Come on in" she said as I was about to knock on the door,

"Don't freak I heard you coming down the stairs - I don't have magical powers" she said as I was strolling in to find her sitting in her underwear on her bed staring at her wardrobe.

"How do I know that you're not just trying to pull a double bluff?" I mocked, crawling onto the bed next to her, kissing her bare shoulder lightly.

"How come you're not dressed Bellie, oh I mean Bella" I mocked again, she gave a short sarcastic laugh before dramatically getting up and throwing an arm towards her wardrobe.

"I can't find anything to wear" she moaned like a baby,

"Oh well, I like what you've got on now" I laughed and got up to wrap my arms around her, she released a frustrated laugh and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"You don't normally worry about what you wear - you know it doesn't matter to me Bella" I whispered into her ear.

"I know, I know - its just I want an outfit that says 'I really, really couldn't care less what you think or say about me. I know me for me, you know nothing'" She pulled back and turned to her wardrobe, instructing my hands to wrap around her waist.

"Oh Bella, don't even think about those silly girls" I said, resting my chin on the dip before her neck.

"Its hard when they are just so stupid" She moaned and craned her neck, giving me permission and room to leave a trail of kisses up and down her neck.

"Throw anything on, I bet your hungry aren't you?" I said finally detaching my lips from her entoxicating neck. She mumbled a yes and starting flicking through her wardrobe for me.

"Ahh, I can't do it" She moaned,

"Do you want me to do it? Or better, I could grab Alice?" I asked, grabbing her arms and twirling her around so she was facing me and only inches from me.

"I think Alice is a bit drastic for this moment in time. Could you chose?" She asked, fiddling with a stray hair from her plait, clearly playing her charming card.,

"I know even less about clothes than you do Bella" I answered honestly and shrugged my shoulders,

"But please" She pouted and I really couldn't resist. I bent down and gave her a quick peck on the lips as a yes and a sigh, but raised my eyebrows to warn 'that won't work every time'. I pushed her gently to the side and back to the bed. I stared at her small wardrobe and wondered what could be so hard. I pulled out her favourite jeans and threw them carefully at Bella, I turned back to look at her and she was shuffling into them. Any other day I would have put her in blue but seeing as I was already wearing blue I decided that we didn't want to match. I pulled out a top that looked simple and nonchalance; it was a grubby grey colour and long sleeved and was cropped so it would show her mid-rift, I then decided she would need a bit of colour and chucked her one of her favourites; her white laced top to wear over the top.

She looked at me in shock when she was dressed, and if I say so myself looking rather 'I really, really couldn't care less what you think or say about me. I know me for me, you know nothing' sort of thing, and good looking of course. She beamed up at me with a large smile and skipped up to me, I grabbed her firmly in my hands and she kissed me with a quick fiery passion.

We went downstairs hand in hand and got ourselves a simple breakfast of toast and milk for Bella. Esme swanned down the stairs not too long after we were seated,

"Now that's a sight I've missed" She chirped walking over to us, I gave her a warning and confused look like 'please, please do not come over and muse our hair'. Luckily she didn't, she kissed me on the forehead and Bella on the cheek. She walked over to the counter and started fiddling with various things before she looked up to us to see us still paralysed in confusion

"You both look so happy, beaming like some- no!" She dramatically dropped whatever she was washing in the sink and stared at us in horror.

"Please tell me you didn't" She whispered,

"Didn't what?" I asked carefully, about to get up but she put up a cautioning hand. I heard Bella gasp beside me and her face went pale, more pale then usual. She tugged on my shirt and signalled me to lean in.

"She thinks we've had sex" She whispered quietly into my ear, with a strange tone I couldn't match on 'sex'. I gasped also and looked at my darling mother with a wide encouraging smile. She was standing now but braced for something drastic.

"Mum, we haven't had sex - I promise" I said calming, my hands up in surrender.

"I promise too Esme" Bella chirped from behind me making me smirk.

"Mum, we are just happy for being happy" Esme finally seemed to relax slowly and then brushed it off like nothing ever happened, I returned to Bella who was trying desperatly to hold in her sniggers of laughter which was making it very hard for me to aswell.

The rest of the family soon filed downstairs in their pairs, Jasper and Rosalie had almost been staying over everynight now and I wasn't surprised that Mum and Dad had let them. I mean Bella does stay here all the time, but its a different situation but Em and Alice were getting all huffy about it. We were just waiting for Emmett to finish his monsterous amount of breakfast before we headed of to school.

**BPOV**

The way to school was calm and peaceful, well it relaxed me at least - everybody was singing along to the tragic radio songs except from Edward and myself. Edward seemed to be in actual pain and I was just laughing along, wishing I had my camera with me. When we got to school however I stared blankly out of the window as the school population gawked at the return of the shiny Volvo. They knew we were back.

Edward rushed out to open the door for me and quickly sensed my anxiousness. He intertwined his fingers with mine and smiled brightly and whispered into my ear, "Everything will be okay" and I tried to believe him. I really did. But when everybody is staring at you, pointing and gossiping it reminded me of my first day - even though this time the gossip was fueled by something I could not control.

I saw Jessica scowl at me from across the playground and I struggled to hold in my laughter as her and her little group of minions starting to laugh pathetically at me. Edward saw them and I gently touched his chest and gave him the 'there are not even worth it' look. He understood and started laughing hysterically making it very hard to keep mine in control, and then I remembered that I didn't have to and exploded in laughter as their pathetic faces dropped. Jessica still had a faded purple lump on her face and I only felt a little sorry.

First period English with Alice and Jasper was funny, we kept on making sarcastic comments about the teacher that he couldn't hear. I know it sounds very immature but it made me giggle all the same. The rest of the periods flew by until lunch, Jessica had apprantly demanded that I be moved for safety reasons - the teacher didn't seem to care so I moved myself to the back and plugged my iPod in and nearly dosed off.

Edward came to collect me with a very protective look on his face and he glared at Jessica as she passed.

"You're girlfriend is a dirty skank" Jessica called once she was far enough away. He looked to me, I just shrugged it off and skipped towards him.

"I think the outfits working" I said to him as we were walking up to our table, he shot a quick look to Emmett and I didn't understand until Emmett burst out laughing and between breaths he spitted out,

"In more ways than one!" Emmett bellowed and the cafeterica went silent and stared at us with confused faces, that mimicked my own before I realised and blushed beyond compare. Edward gave him a less than friendly punch on the arm and took his seat next to me whilst I slurped on my milk through the small straw.

"So is anyone giving you trouble Bella?" Rosalie asked eagerly, I shook my head as I munched on a piece of melon from my salad.

"Not really" I managed once I'd finished, Edward shook his head beside me and the table gave him a quizical look.

"Jessica called you something hideous Bella" He said, struggling to contain his anger. Rosalie was about to stand up and was dramatically rolling up her sleves.

"Oh come on, she isn't even worth it trust me" I said, turning back to look at the little gaggle of hideousness in the far end of the cafeteria.

"I think its impressive that they can glare for that long without their muscles seizing up" Jasper commented, we burst out laughing,

"Maybe they have, thats why they can't change their faces" Alice offered,

"Well, at least they have an excuse for being so ugly now" Rosalie spat out, and began to laugh again.

"And her bruise is still there, fair play for sure Bells" Emmett boomed, not one for subtely really.

"Emmett, I hope that being a spy wasn't one of your preferred carreers you had in mind" I retorted, "You are so loud!" the table began to cackle as Emmett's childish face sank into a 'sob'.

"Whats your preferred carreers then Bella? Boxer?" Jasper mocked,

"Oh ha ha" I laughed sarcastically, the table finally settled down and Alice looked like she was about to explode with laughter.

"Not quite" I replied, Edward looked at me then with a questioning look, I shrugged signalling I didn't have a clue what he wanted me to answer.

"What do you want to do then?" He asked gently, and curiously. I fiddled with my fingers furiously. This is a subject I certainly hadn't thought about - what sort of prospects does a homeless girl have? None.

"Um I guess something to do with art or something I guess" I mumbled, Alice squealed and I looked at her curiously,

"How bohemian, the artist and the musician" She explained, my eyes flickered to Edward and he was smiling smugly. I decided not to panic on the thought that supossedly we were going to make those decisions when we were adults - were we still going to be together. I wouldn't mind but Edward deserved much better than a scatty artist.

"But I've never even taken one art class, its just an idea like maybe I'd like to be an astronout - that doesn't fit into bohemian does it?" I panicked, Edward laughed and stroked the newly formed blush.

"Bells, you'd be a crap astronout" Emmett chuckled to himself, Alice looked a little concerned but it faded when I started laughing and imagining how terrible I would be. Floating around in space, with all of the world beneath me. I would be without Edward for so long, but if he was with me I'd stay and observe the world forever. I could paint all of the wonders of the world, and I wouldn't hvae to worry about people judging me because they wouldn't be able to see. Phil wouldn't be able to come and get me. I would be safe, except from aliens but nothing could destroy what me and Edward had. Our space ship would be made from the stuff that keeps the core of the earth in the core. Thats it, myself and Edward are becoming astronouts.

"Bella?" Edward called anxiously, and I was snapped out of my daydream.

"Yu-huh" I mumbled, the table laughed at my absentness and Edward leaned into me and whispered;

"I'd be an astronout for you"


	41. Chapter 41 Festivity

**EPOV**

You know how time passes and sometimes it doesn't feel like it does, like every day and every week and every month is just one continous day that never stops. Time for Bella and myself had been running like that.

We aren't perfect but I'm sure that we are the closet that anybody is going to get. We argue like a cat and a dog, she thinks that I'm too good to her, I've come to grips that I will never be able to convice her that I haven't given her half of what she deserves. I think that she is too self concious and that she is too selfless. We argue about the smallest of things but pass the arguements off as discussions. But the love we share has no comparison. I've not seen it in Emmett and Rosalie, Alice and Jasper neither my mother and my father. The way I care for her, every single movement I make is rotated around Bella. I spend nearly every second of every day with Bella. She is my angel, she saved my life from rotting away and she is now all that my life is. I think that Carlisle and Esme are worried about how serious we are getting.

I know more about Bella than I do myself but there is still so much more I can learn. I know her body better than she does, I know every angle, every tiny scar, all her ticklish spots, all of the places she is too self concious to show anybody else. I could describe the depth of her eyes for hours on end. I could tell you her life story back to front, tell you what her favourite thing about the night was; the blankness of the sky, she thinks its a open canvas on which peoples lives can be drawn. She thinks that our lives would be painted in green because our love is the thing to envy, and green is her favourite colour. I persisted that our live would be blue, but she insisted that you wouldn't be able to see the blue on the dark night sky canvas. I said that she doesn't like being center of attention and she said that it wasn't the point, our love was the green, her line was blue and faint following the green line where ever it took her.

"Hey there sleepy" Bella whispered into my ear, my eyes popped open to see her chocolate orbs staring back at mine.

"I thought you were painting this morning?" I asked sleepily, wrapping one hand around her back and pulling her closer to me.

"I finished" She stated, and snuggled up to me, "Plus, everybody else is up and we are going shopping today - Alice said so" She was right, Alice had so. We had put it off for too long and Christmas was now only days away.

"You finished already?" I murmered, pulling her even closer wrapping my arms all the way around her waist.

"Yu-huh, and I did some touch-ups on the surprise"

"Touch-ups? I thought it was perfect already" I said playfully,

"Ohh Edward," She half mumbled before being interupted by my lips on hers.

"Hmm, we are shopping, you know how mad she gets" She panted out as I trickled kisses down to her waist. I centered my attention back up to her lips and she tangled her hands in my hair and cemented me agaisnt her. I felt her shake her head agaisnt the kiss as I trailed one hand down her side and waited at the hem of her top.

"She will come up here" Bella warned sensibly. I moaned and then agreed, kissing her one more time before rolling of the bed. I turned back to Bella before flinging open my wardrobe and she looked very flustered indeed and I chuckled to myself.

"Hey, no fair" She moaned as she quickly checked her reflection, "You've made me look all sex crazy" She mumbled walked up towards me.

"I think you look cute" I whispered as she wrapped her arms around my neck. She started placing feathery kisses down my neck and back up to my lips.

"I suppose there isn't anything bad about sex crazy" She whispered back to me onto my open mouth, her voice made my spine tingle. We hadn't had sex yet, that was a really big step. Bella was too fragile, I didn't want to hurt her. But she was really pushing my buttons, and she knew it too. She pulled herself up onto me and wrapped her tiny legs around me but a bit lower than usual, which nearly made me yelp. She kissed me passionately and ran her hands up and down my back and clutched at me when I moved my one hand to support her and the other went up the back of her top and the contact made her shiver. Her hands trailed lower, and I knew I was being played, I could sense it but it was agaisnt my will to stop it so I let her. Her fingers played at the edges of my cotton trackies and she smiled agaisnt the kiss as I stumbled backwards a little and my breathing hitched.

"Who looks sex crazed now" She mumbled as she released my mouth and slowly dropped herself out of my arms and wandered out of the door. I fell agaisnt my wardrobe and used it to keep me mostly on my feet and she poked her head through the door again, taking me by surprise,

"Oh don't worry, I hear it looks cute" She mocked before skipping down the stairs. I heard her cackle loudly and then I heard Alice giggle uncontrollably - today was going to be fabulous. I mumbed incoherently to myself slipping on some ratty jeans.

"Hellooo, little brother!" Emmett bellowed from the doorway, Jasper cracking up at his side. I jumped about a foot in the air before crashing backwards into my wardrobe.

"Very funny" I muttered as I re-composed myself,

"What was all that girly cackling about downstairs then?" Jasper asked casually, swandering into my room.

"Yeah, it nearly burst my eardrums I was so close" Emmett complained

"How am I suppossed to know?" I asked innocently, hiding very cleverly the truth I felt.

"Dude, could you get a little bit more guilty?" Jasper chuckled,

"Not to mention that Bella skipped down from your room, bumped into Rose and Ally and started giggling like a gigglemaniac!" Emmett retorted, okay maybe not so cleverly.

"We were just fooling around, I honestly don't know what they were cackling about" I said, with a ickle bit of a defensive tone. I found a plain off white long sleeved tee and chucked it on and grabbed the manly cardigan that Bella likes and put it on.

"You got played didn't you?" Emmett asked sympathetically,

"No, no, no I didn't" I defended, running my hands through my hair to make it look a little more styled than just straggly - I will never understand Bella's infactuation with my hair.

"Its okay lil' bro, happens to the best of us" Jasper said, giving me a manly pat on the shoulder; mocking sympathy.

"Look, I let her play me" I admitted finally, and then they started to cackle,

"Come on, I did - I swear" It only added to the fire that was their burning laughter. I stormed our of my room and left them in there cackling wildly to themselves.

I jogged down the stairs and into Bella's room to see her taking down her wonderful hair and running her hands through it.

"Knock, knock" I said lightly making her jump slightly - I was impressed that I was still able to do that.

"Edward, don't get mad" She mumbled turning to me, and I suddenly panicked about what she could be referring to. But then I saw her comforting blush and I realised that I had already done that.

"I'm not mad Bella" She smiled so widely I thought it was going to stretch of her face and I loved the tiny creases around her mouth when she smiled. I would never tell her that or else she would freak out about getting prematurely old and never smile again.

"Your wearing my cardigan" She spotted and played with the hem, she loved the texture between her fingers and between her lips, she liked how sometimes it was soft but the liked the tiny ridges between the fabric.

"Well, this cardigan is actually mine - I think it's too big for you" I spoke softly, pulling her closely to me and holding her beautiful cheek where the familiar blush still lay, my other hand was resting on her neck. She craned to kiss me and it was slow and careful but still took my breath away fast; the yearning to be with her more burned through my body and my heart but I put it aside.

"You are looking rather lovely yourself" I said honestly, holding her arm up so she could twirl and show of her outfit. She was wearing thick patterened grey tights and was wearing a long red t-shirt and a off-white cardigan. It was simple but showed her perfect figure - well perfectly.

"Alice picked it" She mumbled,

"You could of picked it" I insisted and she smiled,

"Ready then?" I asked, while she laced her fingers into mine.

"Um kind of, but it'll be okay right?" She asked sheepishly, Bella had been very lucky to not be subjected to more shopping trips with Alice so this was only her third of fourth. Poor innocent Bella. She had much to learn. I merely laughed mischeviously as I led her out of her room and down the stairs where Alice had called the family to attention.

"Right you useless bunch that I have the pleasure of calling my family - shopping!" Alice exlaimed and the majority of the group moaned like being tortured slowly whereas Rosalie and Esme looked nearly as elated as Alice. I gave Bella a sympathetic smile and she furrowed her forehead and raised her eyebrows as if to say 'what choice do I have' I shrugged and scrunched my lips to say 'what choice to do _any _of us have', Bella sniggered and hid in my side waiting for Alice to explode... But she didn't.

"Just you wait Bella" Alice warned menacingly.

......

**BPOV**

We took a car that I had never seen before, it was huge and a obvious family car - an eight seater. I thought it was a mini-bus at first. We all clambered in and I made sure I got a seat next to Edward. We were in the car a lot longer than I could imagine, I wasn't paying attention to the surroundings whizzing by - the honestly made me slightly dizzy, the whole Cullen family drove like crazy people! Edward and I were sharing his iPod in the back on our own, Alice had decided to sit on Jasper's lap even though there was a perfectly comfortable seat next to us.

It didn't matter too much to me, Edward and I were perfectly happy being anti-social being wrapped up in eachother's company like all the time. Phil had completely disappeared from my mind, everything about that had died down. Carlisle had phoned the police station to ask them to please warn us if he try to contact them again. It still gave me shivers to think about so I spent a lot of my time trying not to.

Edward would never let be alone for too long, a habit of his that I adored, not that I didn't adore much about him. Everything about Edward was perfect. He was perfectly perfect in every single way. Except that he was so stubborn. We get on so, so well it seems like we would never run out of things to talk about even if we lived forever, which I would do with him. I could learn every single thing about him, but I would settle for having my lifetime with him. _Um, what? _

Edward brought my attention back to reality and away from the minor panic attack my mind had just sent me into my turning off the music and shifting his weight.

"We are here Bella" He said softly, lifting my head from his shoulder carefully.

"Yay" I said sarcastically and everyone chuckled at my fake enthusiasm while Alice glared at me again with a 'oh you are in for it' look. _Yay. _

I stumbled out of the car last and Emmett was sniggering with Jasper behind everyone else. I had become their entertainment, Emmett said he has never met anyone more capable of falling over nothing as myself. Which is a good thing I guess? But we were bonding so it was funny all the same. We looked like a big pack all walking up to the giant mall in pairs and everybody even during the busy time seemed to have the time to gawk at the gorgeous family I had the pleasure of being with.

Once we got inside Alice turned to us with a mission style face and said the four words I probably never wanted to hear, "Okay, Bella your with us"

......

"I'm never ever, ever shopping ever again with you crazy people" I mumbled sleepily after a whole eight hours shopping! Edward had me craddled to his chest and on his lap because the rest of the back seats and the huge boot where taken up with millions and millions of bags.

"Never, ever, ever?" Alice mocked cheerfully from the seat in front of me. I smiled weakly at Edward and he was barely holding in his laughter. I was honestly glad that I was so amusing.

"Never ever, ever, ever" I repeated and the whole car shook with laughter, I merely moaned and snuggled my head further into Edward's shoulder.

"Is that a challenge?" Rosalie quirked and I twitched with fear and slight irritation - I was too tired for mind games.

"Careful Rose, she gets angry when shes sleepy" Edward kindly warned Rosalie, I tried to turn my head to emphase his point but it just flopped back down.

"N'aww guys, look at her - what on earth did you do to Bella today?" Edward questioned in a very low voice, I was dosing out slowly but I wanted to listen to a bit of this conversation.

"The usual" Alice replied innocently,

"Yeah, shopping until she dropped, and she dropped hard!" Rosalie cackled and Edward moved his hands to cover my ears and hissed at Rosalie to hush.

"We were trying to find her something for Christmas, and of course we were buying for all of the family instead of just us so we dragged her through a million shops trying to find her five things to buy! It was more difficult for Rose and myself I swear" I heard Alice whisper now, the car shuddered with silent laughter. So thats what they had been doing, not shopping for something for there cousins that happen to be the exact same size as me. Sneaky.

"Oh come on Alice, shes so new to shopping with you! Eight hours, we had it okay because well because come on we are lads" Edward explained and started to stroke my back sympathetically.

"Oh hush, hush - she was fine" Rosalie defended them and their ruthless shopping tatics.

"Hmm, well at least we got everything today" Carlisle deliberated from the front, calming everybody down. After that I slipped away into a peaceful sleep and Edward filled sleep.

I was mildly aware of the weight shifting beneath me but too tired to do anything about it, I just fell back agaisnt the empty slightly cold chair while a ripple of rustling of many, many bags around me.

"Sleepy Bella, you want to wake up just a little bit?" Edward whispered to me and shifted his arms under my weight.

"No, its okay. I think I can walk" I mumbled sleepily, and used Edward's arm to steady myself. He was my crutch all the way inside the house, and then my jawed drop as I grasped just how much we had brought today. There were literally mountains of bags in the living room - I don't know how Alice can keep track of whos was whos. It baffled me and made me possibly more tired, I shyed away into Edward's side. He lead me all the way up to my bedroom and let me fall lazily onto the bed.

"Oh Bella, you too sleepy to undress?" I barely had enough energy to reply but mumbled a please and he obligied. He rolled my tights slowly of off my legs and he sent small shivers over my body and then shrugged me out of my cardigan and slowly lifted my top and dropped them all in a pile by the bed, he turned to get me some pajamas but the sudden cold urged me to get under the covers sooner than he could get me dressed so I rolled under them in just my underwear, when he turned around he chuckled lightly and undressed, shuffled in the covers with me.

"I know it was a long day Bella, I'm sorry" Edward murmered when he was close enough to wrap his arms around me.

"Well anything for Christmas" I grumbled

"I didn't know that you liked Christmas" He complained, and stroked my cheek softly.

"Its a good one, a good holiday - one of my favourites" I stumbled over my words and he laughed lightly at me; wriggling me around so he could pull me agaisnt his bare chest.

"Lets make it a good one then shall we?" He mumbled, now feeling the sleep that had been dragging me under.


	42. Chapter 42 Christmas

**BPOV  
**

"So how come you like Christmas then?" Edward asked casually whilst snuggling into my bed, closer to me. It was Christmas tomorrow and the days had just zoomed by and we had hardly seen eachother because Alice and Esme had gone a little Christmas crazy if you ask me. There were plenty of arguements over the last two days about who had the scizzors and 'who took all of the wrapping paper' - Alice said that and I believe that she indeed took all of the wrapping paper because she is crazy and brought us all about a million presents.

Obviously though, the house looked stunning; those beloved fairylights were spread around the outside linings of the house which made the house stand out even more. The Christmas tree baffled me the most, it was just over half as tall as the stairs and I didn't want to ask how on earth they got it in. It was beautiful, all in silver and red, 'contempory' Alice called it. There were big ball-balls hanging from the ceiling and not a peice of tinsle in sight, she said it was the ultimate sin of Christmas decorations.

"Well, it used to be my Mum's favourite holiday and it's the main memory of her I have being really, really happy. Sometimes I used to come here for Christmas too, visit Charlie and obviously I loved that. And everybody is just so cheerful, I mean my Mum died around Christmas time but like I don't know it was well not okay, but I thought atleast she was a bit happy you know" I ranted slowly, and struggled to keep my breathing in control before I went into hyperventalation. Esme talks to me, and she says its a good thing to remember the good things, and I do mostly - sometimes there is just no avoiding the bad things... Like death.

"N'aww Bella, come on" Edward ushered wrapping his hand around my neck and pulling me into his bare chest. He soothed me until my breathing had steadied and I raised my head to look into his eyes,

"You okay?" He asked carefully, stroking my cheek with his delicate thumb.

"Yu-huh, good memories" I said with a big smile, and interupted his gaze with a small kiss to his cheek but deliberatly tickling the corner of his lips with mine. It sent him wild and he pulled me on top of him and kissed me fiercely, he left shivers and tingles all over my body as his lips trailed over my curves. I wiggled down to meet his face to draw his attention back to my lips. Teenage lust is a wonderful thing, I wanted to have sex with Edward, I was ready to have sex with Edward but he didn't want to, well I hadn't talked to him about it - how would you bring that up?

_"Hey, wanna have sex?" I ask casually, "Umm, not really?" Edward replies, "Is now the time?" He questions gesturing around to his family onlooking carefully. "Well, why not?" I would ask, he would reply "Because you are the definition of _issues"

And thats about how fun talking about having sex with Edward would be. He drives me wild with his little precious touches, eletric tingles flow through my body and I don't think I can contain it. He pulls away and both are breathing is erratic, he flops onto his back and makes space for me to listen to his heart. I listened carefully, not that I had to - it was beating so loud I thought it was about to pop out of his perfect chest. I wish that I am the only one that could ever make his heart flutter like that, like a humming bird.

"Is something on your mind Bella?" He asked as I shuffled back to rest my head on the pillow so we were facing eachother. The strong moonlight shining through the glass wall was beaming of off Edward's face iluminating his perfect face.

"Stay there" I whispered as I creeped off of the bed and silently tiptoed to my camera and brought it back to the bed. I crouched down at my side of the bed so my shadow wouldn't be cast in the photo - he whined when he realised what I was doing.

"Please?" I begged and he sighed dramatically before resting his features. I mouthed 'love you' and his gorgeous smile burst across his face. I snapped that, without a flash and just the autofocus.

"Put your hand out, like flop it agaisnt the bed, like you are trying to get me back in bed" I instructed and he sleepily did as I said. A couple of frantic minutes later I shuffled back into bed with the camera to show him what'd I'd done. I had become a lot more comfortable with showing things that I create, especially Edward. Even if he was always nice I could tell when he was lying - not that he ever was.

"You are so talented Bella" He ushered to me, sitting up in bed now as I flicked through them.

"It helps when you have such a beautiful boyfriend" I complimented, resting my head on his shoulder. He held the camera at arms length and turned it back on us.

"No, no" I pleaded,

"Just one Bella, please - tell me that this wouldn't be a great photo. Honestly" He warned at the end, I dramatically huffed and he started to laugh which made me laugh because I couldn't stay moody when he was so happy. He clicked quickly as soon as I started to laugh, typical. I looked up to him begging him to give it back and there was another sudden flash. He laughed to himself and carefully placed it on the bedside table.

"Do I not even get to see?" I moaned and he didn't answer and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. He shuffled us back down so we were lying again and were facing eachother, the moonlight still bouncing of off him brightened up his magical green eyes and made me beg internaly for my camera again.

"You never told me what was on your mind" He said softly,

"Ah, I never admitted that there was something on my mind" I retorted quitely, it was getting too late to speak much louder.

"Come on Bella" He encouraged and I huffed and flopped onto my back, this would be easier if I weren't looking into his never ending pools of nature erupting from his gorgeous eyes.

"Bella?" He asked again, curious this time. Just breathe Bella,

"I want to have sex with you"

**EPOV**

"I want to have sex with you" Bella all but whispered, I practically choked. Why didn't she tell me to sit down or something before she dumped that. I started coughing and had to sit upright in bed until I slowly stopped choking. She looked over to me, worry covering her face.

"I'm sorry" She said softly and fell back agaisnt the pillows, "I shouldn't have said anything" She mumbled, rolling onto her face to cover the newly forming blush.

"No, no Bella. I asked didn't I? You just shocked me" I said, tugging gently on her arm to turn her over and she did, very slowly.

"But you don't want to, and I know that you don't. So I should of just kept my big trap shut" She mumbled, and then continued into completely incoherent mumblings.

"Hey, hey" I said pulling her attention back to me, "Its not that I don't want to Bella" I said honestly. I mean who wouldn't want to do something as brilliant as to make love to the most beautiful perfect girl in the world.

"I didn't think you were ready for something like that Bella, I swear - I mean I _want _to. Trust me" I said before she had a chance to go off on a mumbling rant again.

"But I am ready Edward" She said softly, turning on her back again.

"I am just nervous for you Bella, I know that you've been abused that way - I didn't want to push you" I said carefully, controlling the rage that cursed through me when I remembered how she told us of how that brute would attack her.

"Yeah, no kidding so do I Edward. I was kind of there" She said shuffling away from me and swinging her legs of the bed - facing blankly out of the glass wall.

"No, Bella, I know, I didn't mean it like that, please" I mumbled out many words at the same time, not sure what to say. I hopped out of bed and rushed around to face her, I blocked her view from the outside and placed my hands gently on her soft cheeks that were already wet with silent tears.

"Oh Bella" I whimpered, kissing her gently on the head and she smiled a weak smile.

"I didn't mean it like that" I defended, trying to reassure her. She nodded and smiled again,

"I know" She whispered, and placed a delicate hand on my neck.

"It would be different, I want a new memory Edward, a perfect memory - with you" She continued, looking into my eyes with such sincerity it made me want to scream with joy or cry, but I would do niether because I'm a man! I breathed a laugh and she smiled warily,

"I love you Bella" I whispered, pushing her slowly back into bed. And in my mind I knew exactly what I would do to make this perfect for her. I would do anything for her, I would erase all memory of anything not worthy of her beautiful mind to remember. We fell asleep shortly after that, with Bella wrapped securely in my arms and her arms around me I could stay like that forever.

........

"Happy Christmas" Bella whispered rather seductively in my ear and I sprung awake.

"Hey, I set an alarm; how come it didn't go off?" I moaned as I saw her sitting up right in the bed on her knees facing me, her face was even more beautiful with happiness. She looked well, she looked like a child on Christmas. Her eyes were bright with enthusiasm and optimism.

"I woke up before it and turned it off, and decided that I would wake you up instead of the alarm, was that okay?" She said, crawling towards me, I opened my arms and she gently flopped agaisnt my chest letting me envelope her in my arms

"Its perfectly fine my Bella, you know we don't have long until Alice will call us to attention" Knowing my sister she was probably waiting for us already. I patted Bella of off me and opened the bedroom door, where yes I was meeting with two Christmas patterened jumpers for myself and Bella. I turned back to Bella with an amused face and she started to giggle profusely. I launched hers over to her and she wiggled it on, I slid mine on and I heard Bella gasp and giggle some more. I looked down at my chest to find that Alice had gone one step

further this year and gave us matching ones. They were both knitted, as every year only this time we had big white hearts knitted in the middle of the jumpers. I sighed and looked over to Bella. Hers was hanging of off her and she shrugged her shoulders, mine was a perfect fit for me and I think she enjoyed that. She pointed to her wardrobe and then to her cotton three quarter trackies she had on.

"Nah, first half of the day is pajamas, let's go" I said and held my hand out for her and she ran over to her camera, collected it and then laced her fingers into mine.

"You're first Cullen Christmas, Merry Christmas" I whispered as we reached the stairs, she looked down them and saw my family beaming up at us brightly.

"Merry Christmas!" They boomed as we skipped down the stairs. Alice was erratic as always, she was boucning up and down and the family sighed as they realised that we _all _had the same jumpers. Alice ran over to us and grabbed Bella in a huge hug and Bella's beautiful smile grew.

"Well everyones here now Alice, can we eat?" Emmett asked impatiently, Alice dropped Bella from the hug and turned to glare at Emmett. Bella went pale,

"Did I keep everyone waiting?" She asked quietly, Emmett starting laughing at her innocence and Bella blushed,

"No, of course you didn't Bella - I did. I always do, tradition" I said to her, calming her down instantly and her beautiful smile was smacked across her face again. Bella had her camera as we were all dragged into the kitchen and sat down next to me and Rosalie was next to her. Bella placed her camera grandly on the table as if to say 'lucky I charged it last night' and Emmett and Jasper struck poses and she grabbed a few shots and their faces dropped,

"Dude, how did you turn it on that fast?" Jasper asked completely baffled,

"Thats what she said!" Emmett chuckled, we stared at him like and Rosalie pretended to start crying and we all gave her lots of sympathy, after the laughter died down Emmett continued, "Seriously though?"

"It was never not on" Bella replied with a sneaky menacing smirk on her face. Esme strolled over to the table with a very large plate of food, even for us it was big. It was filled with pancakes and a million different toppings to put on. Emmett giggled with joy and clapped his hands greedily.

"Hold it Emmett, just a second" Esme warned as she set it in front of us and took her seat next to Carlisle and beamed at the family, "Bella would you put your camera on timer and take a nice picture of us please?" Esme asked politely, Bella jumped up without replying and positioned her camera -

"You know this would probably looked better if everybody would stand up" Bella commented, looking through the lense. We obligied and stood up where we were, she laughed a gorgeous desperate laugh and sighed, "Arrange yourself nutters" She told us again and we did it properly this time. "Perfect" She mumbled before she set her camera down and ran towards us and took her space infront of me.

"Okay, one, two three say" Bella started, and

"Milk!" Everyone bellowed before the flash, Bella ran back up to check the camera and then gave Emmett a curious look.

"Emmett, what do you call that?" Bella asked mockingly, we all skipped to huddle around her so we could see; we all gasped when we figured it out but Bella still looked confused

"Its Emmett's thinking face" Rosalie cackled before practically rolling over with laughter, Jasper was on the way out too. Carlisle was sniggering profusely, trying veyr hard to keep it in. Bella wiggled out of the fort we created around her and knabbed a quick picture of the hysteria that was our family. Then something dawned on me

"Hey Emmett, what were you thinking about?" I asked, turning to him - he had been one of the only ones not to be immensly amused by the picture.

"Well, I'm not sure I'm going to tell, it was actually a very good idea" He sulked childishly,

"Oh come on Em we were only joking" Alice defended,

"I was thinking that instead of 'milk' we should say 'egg nog' you know for the day?" He offered, everybody started laughing manically. I noticed Bella had her camera in a very ready position.

"Okay, okay another photo then - get back together" Bella instructed kindly, we did as she said and ordered ourselves in the same way. She ran back to us, and repeated the timing again,

"One, two three say"

"Egg nog!"

.........

**BPOV**

After breakfast and many hilarious pictures later we strolled into the living room where it was all so relaxed, there wasn't anything to worry about. I didn't think when Renee died that I'd be able to enjoy Christmas without her, she was the soul of me; even when the drugs had taken her over. She was still my Renee, she was the one who lied to me about Father Christmas for so many years, who somehow brought me everything I wanted when sometimes we only had dinner two times a week. I actually believed in Father Christmas for so long, agaisnt all logic because I thought that there was no way that my Mum could afford it. She was my Christmas but being here with the Cullens was new, not better but different. I don't want to replace the memories of my past years but I want to build on them with good memories instead of wallowing. The Cullens were letting me do that, for that I would be forever grateful.

Alice was 'Santa's little helper' and she even had a Santa hat, she was passing out the presents and making sure that everybody had the right one. And of course I took some pictures of her. I was so nervous sitting in the midst of all of them. I had never brought them anything, and now I was doing so with _their _money. Edward had assured me that thats what everyone had done, but the unease didn't fade, especially now with their hopeful faces.

Alice was so excited she started to squeal even before anyone opened anything.

"Alice give our eardrums a chance" Jasper commented, releasing his ears. He was sitting closet to her and I think mine would have burst. Alice nodded solomenly but her smile popped right back after about three seconds.

"Come on then" she urged, and we commenced. My first present was from Emmett and Jasper, I opened the very large box and I had a giant dark blue hoodie. Jasper and Emmett giggled from infront of me,

"Go on, turn it over" Rosalie coached, I picked it up and flipped it over. In big white letters it had 'BELLS' written on it and in smaller font above it had 'MASTERFUL'. They started to cackle wildly and I joined in. Everybody was looking at us in utter shock and confusion but they wouldn't understand even if we explained and Jasper was the first to control his laughter.

"You wouldn't even get it guys" He choked out between bursts of laughter. I finally got control of myself and wiped some tears from my face. I looked up to Edward and he was beaming at me.

"Thank you guys" I beamed, standing up to hug them but I was interupted by Alice, waggling her finger at me.

"Nope, no hugs or thank yous - you'll trip over and mess things up" She laughed and I took my seat again, the family begun their laughter again.

Everyone else got gorgeous items of clothing and games and books and jewelery I also got a heap and a half of all of the above. I was sure to keep my presents to them until last. I stood up before Alice got a chance to hand them out.

"Let me explain about your presents," I spoke clearly, but they all looked up to me with confused expressions. I continued anyway;

"You're presents aren't like the rest you've got or given. Um ever since I've come here you've all been so good to me and I've experienced feelings and things that I thought I wouldn't be able to feel again. But being with you, you've given me a chance to live my life properly. Giving me the experiences that I've always wanted. Well except from the shopping, so I've decided to give you all experiences instead of material things, but I can take them back if you want" I rattled out, everybody breathed a quick laugh when I mentioned shopping. Esme looked close to tears and got up to hug me anyway ignoring Alice's no hugging until the end rule. Alice huffed and got up to stand beside me.

"Its close enough to the end" She whined as she wrenched me out of her mothers hold into a tight hold of her own. Soon enough the whole family were invading me with a group hug and I decided to saviour the feeling instead of complaining about lack of oxygen.

"Guys shes going purple" Carlisle warned and they all seperated and went to sit down. I was the last after handing out their presents. I sat down nervously next to Edward, he had one too and was baffled as to what it would be. I had been very sneaky. Esme and Carlisle had a joint one and was the first to open theirs.

"Oh Bella," Esme whimpered, staring down at the tickets in her hand.

"What is it?" Alice asked eagerly, Carlisle choked down some tears before replying.

"Its two gift cards for the Metropolitan Opera in New York" He answered calmly now, beaming at me. I looked to Esme with begging eyes and she smiled widely and mouthed a 'thank you' to me. I looked up at Edward and pleaded with my eyes 'is that okay?' and he gave me a soft kiss on the forehead saying 'you did _real _good'.

Alice was now kiddy with anticipation, I urged her to open hers, and Rosalie at the same time.

They both took a cautious look at eachother before looking down again at their tickets, "Toronto Fashion Week!!!!" they both sqeauled and bounded over to me and squashed me flat in a hug. They released me and started jumping up and down tickets in hand.

"Bella, bella, bella thank you, thank you, thank you" Alice beamed at me and struggled to sit back down calmly.

"Okay then, Jasper Emmett - want to open yours?" I offered, they both smiled widely at me before ripping away their wrapping paper. They both were striken with silence and I prayed awe as they stared intently at their cards. They exchanged an indentical look as Rosalie and Alice had done, held up their tickets to one another and then proceeded to jump up and down as the girls had done. I made sure to get a quick pictures of that but they didn't seem to care.

"Come on then boys, what did you get?" Carlisle asked impatiently, everybody was eager and Edward gave me a quizical look.

"Avatar Primere tickets!" Jasper exclaimed,

"Dude, the first screening of Avatar in cinemas!" Emmett boomed,

"Wow" Edward muttered behind me and I was suddenly nervous that I hadn't gotten him what he wanted. Emmett and Jasper turned to me and I raised my hands in surrender and stood up before they could crush me and Edward.

"Shes a keeper for sure!" They boomed at Edward and ran at me and picked me up in what I can only describe as being in the iron grip of a giant mutant teddy bear - or two. Once they released me the room went silent as they all looked in Edward's direction.

"Go on then Eddie boy, what did wonder woman get you?" Emmett pryed, my nerves balled up and I snatched the present away from him.

"Hey, hey, how come I don't get a present" Edward moaned,

"I'm scared you wont like it" I mumbled as he came closer, blocking out the rest of his family so it was only me and him in the room as he put his hands on my arms.

"Bella, I'm positive I will like it but even if I don't you can take it back like you said" He negotiated,

"But, you won't like it - I can get you another ticket for Avatar if you want?" I moaned.

"Bella, no. I want what you've given me."He argued, I stood stubbornly for a minute as his eyes poored with pleading and reassurance.

"Okay, well how about I give you you're present first. Can you imagine how scared I am that you don't like _your _present" I nodded eagerly and he dragged me off taking me by surprise. I heard the family following quickly and I stared in wonder as we walked into his room, with his glorious piano. He sat down carefully on the seat after he placed me beside of it so he could see me clearly, even though I didn't think that my legs would last. The family were waiting eagerly at the side of the room.

"This um is for you Bella" Edward stuttered nervously, and stared down at the keys infront of him. The notes started to fill the room as he started to play softly and then my legs almost gave way when his mouth dropped and he started to sing;

"I'll be your man  
And I'll understand  
And I'll do my best  
To take good care of you

You'll be my queen  
I'll be your king  
And I'll be your lover too  
Yeah yeah

Yes I will

Derry down green  
Color of my dream  
A dream that's daily coming true.  
And ohhh when the day is through  
I will come to you and tell you of  
Your many charms

And girl you look at me  
With eyes that see  
And we'll melt into each others eyes

You'll be my queen  
And I'll be your king  
And I'll be your lover too"

Clapping erupted from the crowd behind me and I was crying, my vision was blurred. He ran up from his seat with the biggest smile on his face and was awaiting my response as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You wrote that for me?" I choked out, and he sighed a delicate yes.

"Oh Edward" I whimpered, pulling myself up and snuggling my head into his shoulder.

"It was beautiful" I whispered into his ear and he tightened his grip around my waist holding me there forever and I repeated the song over in my head, it was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. His voice was like an angels and his fingers scattered across the piano like it was something he was born to do.

"Okay, I think I'll give you your present now" I said whilst dropping from his hold and we were walking back to his family. They shuffled quickly out of our way and sat back down in the same places. All of the girls were frantically wiping their tears away before I gave Edward back his present.

He opened it very carefully, and his face was confused for a second and then his beautiful eyes shimmered over and his smile grew.

"The guy said he's never heard a raw talent like yours before, he said you can drop in anytime to start recording" I said softly, my tears threatening to over spill. Esme clapped her hands together once she grasped what it was.

"You sent my music to a producer?" Edward choked out, looking at me with adoring eyes.

"Well more than one, they all said yes but I liked that one better - less corporal" I muttered and he pulled me in for a hug.

"I love you so much Bella, so, so much" He ushered into my ear and slowly let me go before turning to his family,

"Bella has basically started my music career, it's a card to call a producing studio. I'm allowed to make an appointment and just go right?" I nodded quickly after he was done explaining and he pulled me in for another hug.

"Oh wait, I have a second part to your present Bella" He said as he looked under the tree.

"Really?" I asked shocked, "but your song it was so beautiful, I don't need anything else Edward" I continued as he got up and picked up a small box covered in wrapping paper.

"Just open it" He instructed, I obliged quickly and opened it. Jewerly, I thought as I saw the small dark green box and the lighter bow - I looked up and smiled brightly at Edward before opening it. He would always use my favourite colour. He urged me to look inside and I lifted the lid and practically lost all feeling in my body except from my heart and eyes. I lifted them to Edward and his face was so nervous and awaiting, I looked back down at the gorgeous locket in the box. It was big but not too big that I couldn't wear it all the time. It was silver, and had the hammered effect. It had engravings of tiny flowers swirling around it.

"Jesus Edward" Alice gasped from behind me when I held it up to admire it some more,

"That is stunning darling" Esme muttered too, I didn't take my eyes from it until Edward spoke;

"Look inside" He all but whispered, I looked at him adoringly and he beamed his gorgeous smile - urging me to continue. I carefully unlocked it and peeked inside. I couldn't control the tears anymore as they ran and ran down my cheeks,

"Bella, Bella" He cooed, pulling me into a tight hug. I wiped my tears away so I could look at it again. On one side there was a stunning picture of Renee, the sun refracted from behind her and made her look like an angel - I had carried this picture around with me for so long in my purse and I had recently put it in the trunk. I whimpered as I remembered when I had taken it, on the beach on my eleventh birthday - we went for a walk when the sun was setting she was so beautiful. On the opposite side was a picture of Charlie, it was cropped but I remembered the orginal of this photo he was looking down at me but you could see his eyes completely, they were bright and happy and his smile was huge, his hair was in a mess and he looked like a proper Dad. I wish he would of had the chance to be a father for me. I reached out carefully with my index finger to touch the two pictures.

"Edward, I um I ah I" I choked out, stumbling furiously over my words and Edward breathed a relieved laugh. "I love you" I said without slur and I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and he wrapped his around my waist and held me there. I pulled myself together before I released my neck so he could put me down carefully. I handed my beautiful locket around so everybody could see what my wonderous Edward had done for me.

"Do you always have to make us look so bad?" Emmett moaned to Edward passing the locket back to me so I could drap it over my neck.

"Seriously, that even came as a surprise to me" Alice commented and I suddenly remembered my main present to the family. I skipped upstairs very quickly leaving the family behind me in complete silence. I had wrapped it but I'd left it my studio so they wouldn't be able to get at it.

**EPOV**

As Bella skipped delicately up the stairs I knew what had triggered her off, 'surprise'. I decided to play along with my family and pretend I didn't know what my brilliant girlfriend had created. I was elated that she liked both her presents, her locket took me about a century to find but as soon as I saw it I knew it was for her. I was looking for one and that just burst out at me, Those two pictures I put in it were her favourites but I made sure to make copies instead of using the orginals.

Unfortunately, I couldn't say such time and effort went into her song. It had come to me when I was sitting at my piano one day, daydreaming about Bella of course. The whole song just flew from my fingers into my brain, the words fit perfectly as my hands glided over the keys. But it came from the heart - that much I knew. I knew that she would much prefer a present like that in comparision to me spending billions and billions on her, not that I wouldn't. I would within a heart beat if that is what she wanted.

Her presents to us were absolutely perfect, she thought from the heart and in the short time that she had been her she understood better than anyone what they would want but would never think of for themselves. I know that it has been Alice's dream to become a fashion designer so her tickets to the fashion week was absolute genuis. Esme and Carlisle share a passsion for arts that have all but passed, it comes from their grandparents they say. The opera was something that they never got to do and they deserved time and entertainment to themselves more than anyone. And my gift, I swear my heart nearly stopped. Bella had sent my music off to producers all over the country and she said that all of them had said that they would want to listen to me. She knew me so well that she chose a perfectly sized company that was close enough to home. My music had been my first passion above anything else until Bella arrived but I was never confident enough in myself to do anything about it.

Avatar, well that was just awesome. My family were still silent when Bella came skipping back down the stairs, huge canvas in both hands, she could barely see over it. She smiled brightly at me when she saw the rest of the silent family.

"Okay guys, you can do what you like with this" She mumbled before handing it to Esme and Carlisle, "Its for all of you, but I figured you guys could open it" They all nodded and Carlisle stood up holding it awkwardly while he gestured for Esme to unwrap it, so it was in view of the whole family at once. Esme slowly peeled the wrapping paper and Alice was growing very impatient, bouncing up and down with excitment. The first sight that we saw was the deepest blue of the sky and the tones that ran through the sky but there were much lighter blue strokes that weren't the sky - only flicks and they were letters! Esme ripped the wrapping paper out of the way and my family gasped in unison.

"Oh lord" Carlisle gasped, struggling to keep his hold on the canvas. Esme stumbled back from where she was kneeling. Alice was silent, Emmett was in awe.

"Almighty!" Rosalie added, as out of breathe as everyone else in the room.

Bella was checking everyones faces to check for their reactions. It was _the _most stunning picture she had painted. It was a family portrait. Esme and Carlisle were painted slightly levitated from us and looking down at us caringly, the rest of us were all laughing and having fun below, our faces were animated and paused in time. She had used the most detailed of brush strokes but thick paint so it left texture for every single brush stroke she had made. And the best thing about the painting was that she had included herself in the painting, she wasn't center she was with me - where she belonged: forever.

"So is it okay?" Bella asked very quietly still shattering the silence that had swamped the room. Everyone turned to Bella with accusing faces saying; 'as if this could be _anything _less than okay'. She laughed nervously and turned to me with pleading eyes.

"What do you think guys?" I offered to the crowd, hoping that I wouldn't get the harmless glare that Bella had recieved.

"Are you kidding Edward? Have you gone blind? Its stunning" Alice chirped, finally breaking her silence walking towards it so she could feel the textures.

"Magical" Jasper offered, we looked at him rather baffled at his choice of words, "Come on, it shut Emmett up - there has to be something magical about it" He laughed, we joined in and he went to wrap his arms around Alice's waist from the back resting his chin agaisnt her shoulder.

"Come on Emmett, spit it out" Rosalie coached, nudging Emmett in the ribs, we all looked cautiously at him and waited for his reply.

"Am I really that good looking?" He finally came out with, we all burst out laughing and Emmett was nearly wetting himself.

"What does it actually say, I haven't read it yet" Carlisle asked, Bella chirped up before the rest of them even got to look at it again,

"If your friends are the family that you chose, then every family and friend in the world should surely envy this family. They chose themselves, they chose eachother, they chose me. They are the symbol of happiness,of fun, of strength, of understanding, of care and of love" She said without stutter of fault, she spoke it as if she had learnt the words to speak to the world. She spoke with sincerity and honesty. We all turned to look at her in awe,

"Crap" She muttered, "I didn't make you Christmas cards"


	43. Chapter 43 Thanks

**BPOV**

They couldn't decide where to hang my canvas right away so we left it infront of the T.V instead as we went to make Christmas lunch. I was told that everybody was in on making it, I pulled a worried face at Edward and he just laughed it off saying that he was actually with-holding his secret skill at cookery. We had been cooking or some of them more helpfully standing around while we were cooking for about 3 hours and we were nearly done. I was elbow-deep in cooking so Edward, Emmett and Jasper offered to look after my camera, yes it made me very nervous too. I saw the flash go off multiple times during the time, and I decided to stop looking up because I hated to think that they were taking them off me.

Rosalie and Alice had offered to set the table about an hour ago which left only myself, Esme and Carlisle really cooking. Edward was there giving encouraging support but mainly just watching me, making me smile as I never felt his eyes leave my face but jealous that he could concentrate on me while I had to cook. But I wanted to do as much as I could for the adoring family that had given me so much.

It took four trips to get all of the food to the large dining room table, it was truly a tremndeous amount of food. Emmett was getting impatient and wanted to eat, and quickly but Carlisle signaled that he wanted to give a toast. I got my camera at the ready as he stood up he looked impossibly tall and comanding but loving.

"I'd like to make a toast" He spoke clearly, looking around the table. Edward grabbed my hand underneath the table and intertwined his fingers in mine and I looked up at him and he smiled widely before nodding back to Carlisle.

"First of all, Merry Christmas to every one. I hope that we have all enjoyed ourselves - _whatever _we were doing today. For example some of us cooked and slaved away in the kitchen while _others _scampered off." He paused while we laughed and quickly continued, "I know how much effort that everybody puts into our wonderful Christmases but this Christmas I think I would like to mention one person in particular" He paused to look at me and I blushed furiously, the table roared in encouragement and quickly stopped to let Carlisle continue,

"Bella, I think I can speak for the whole family when I say that you have completed this family," more howls of encouragement and entertainment soared around the table, Edward was stroking soothing circles on the back of my hand, and beaming like well, like it was Christmas. "You have touched all of our hearts, some more than others," Emmett moaned with laughter, his face was bright pink it was like he couldn't laugh anymore, I wish, "You have lightened up our dear Edward's life, and there is a new light within too. And of course, you have become part of the routine around here, hopefully we haven't scared you off. So Merry Christmas Bella and thank you for making our family whole and our presents!" He finished dramatically, and then frantic clapping followed.

"Speech, speech, speech" They started chanting over and over at me. I blushed even harder - if that was possible - and I finally stood up before they burst their eardrums. They cheered with excitment and sucess as I held my glass up to the middle of the table.

"Um, okay - way to put me on the spot" I joked, while trying to fix together something good enough to say, "Oh I've got it - hold on" I skipped over to my iPod in the dock conected to the speakers in the room that was previously playing soft music. I changed it to Laura Izibore - Shine. "If I could borrow the words of brilliant Laura when she says;

Wake up one morning you realize  
Your life is one big compromise Stuck in the job you swore was only temporary

Feel like the world is passing you by  
Never done all the things you would need to try  
Stuck in one place, got a pain in your face from all your stressin' out

You ask yourself there's got to be more than what I'm living for  
You ask yourself there's got to be something else, something more, more, more

Well let the sun shine on your face  
And don't let your life go to waste  
Now is the time, got to make up your mind  
Let it shine on you, let it shine on you" I spoke/sang as she did, luckily the family joined in as they all recognised the song. I turned and turned down the song so it was just playing in the background as the family infront of me clapped eratically and so I could continue.

"Thank you, um that sort of showed how my life was before I came here. Like being stuck and stuff but then when I came here well, Forks isn't the sun, obviously, but you guys are. So um thank you again and Merry Christmas, I'll be here all week" I continued making my way back to my seat.

"Well, hopefully more than a week" Carlisle said as I took my seat next to Edward, who was smiling widely at me and kissed me on the cheek. Carlisle signalled for us to start

"We should make this a tradition" Esme suggested while we were greedily eating, all of our heads twitched up to look at her.

"Make what a tradition Mum?" Alice asked cheerfully,

"Karaoke on Christmas" She finished, looking at me making me blush again,

"Oh, we don't have to" I mumbled and looked up to Edward who was still grinning at me.

"That. Would. Be. Epic!" Emmett said loudly, emphasing just how 'epic' it would be.

"We'll vote then," Carlisle offered, everyone nodded around the table; "Karaoke, raise your hands" Everybody quickly whipped their hands up and looked at me expectingly, I slowly raised mine and more yelps and cheers of excitement erupted from the table. Dinner was over surprisingly quickly and after crackers and the _hilarious_ jokes from inside and we were made to put on the silly paper crowns (which I got many, many, photos of) I offered to wash-up with Esme while the others set up the games and movies.

"It is beautiful" Esme was complimenting my locket and admiring it while we were washing and drying.

"I know, I'm so lucky" I said politely in return,

"You know, I think that we are the lucky ones - espeically Edward, he thinks the utter world of you" I had forgotten just how freakishly observant mothers could be and then realised that Edward and I never really tried to hide the way we feel so the amount of things that Esme would have noticed would be collosal.

"Sometimes I don't think I deserve him" I mumbled absently,

"No, no darling, you are both deserving of each other; you are perfect for eachother" She said softly handing me a big glass bowl.

"Thank you so much, for everything Mum" I tensed at my foolishness, the bowl in my hands cracked under the pressure, smashed and fell to the floor with a loud crash. My mother was hanging around my neck and I had the cheek to forget her - on Christmas! I felt like screaming at myself. Esme quickly tried to comfort me but I shyed away, heading towards the back door. Edward reached the kitchen door with his family behind him, he looked at me frantically and then at _his _mother.

"I just need to go for a walk, I need some air" I stumbled over my words, and backed further towards the door.

"No Bella, your not running, stay here please" Edward begged,

"I'm not running, I just need to breathe" I murmered again, my voice was weakening and my vision was blurring so I turned and jogged out of the back door.

**EPOV**

The loud crash from the kitchen made us all jump. I sprinted up without urgency to check on Bella. When I reached the door and saw the shock on Bella's face and the scratches on her hands, I freaked. She was backing towards the door and just knew that she was going to run.

"I just need to go for a walk, I need some air" She defended herself poorly, her voice was stammering and she can't hide stuff like that from me anymore.

"No Bella, your not running, stay here please" I begged, walking towards her with my hands up raised, showing her that I wasn't any danger to her.

"I'm not running, I just need to breathe" She mumbled and before I got a chance to retort she was jogging out of the back door, I threw my hands up in frustration and slammed them agaisnt the counter. I looked to Esme for an explanation;

"She called me 'Mum'" She said softly, bending over to collect the shattered bowl on the floor.

"No, Mum don't worry I'll get it" Alice offered, shuffling out from behind me.

"Its not you Mum; its just hard for her" I defeneded for Bella and reassured my darling mother that she was not in the wrong.

"Its okay, I understand" Esme murmered and stared out the glass wall, searching for Bella - which is what I should be doing. I turned to my family and shrugged before sprinting out of the back door searching for her.

"Bella?" I called hopefully, and was surprised when she called back weakly.

"Edward, I'm here" She whimpered from just behind the trees edges. I sprinted towards her and hugged her tightly around the waist. She was holding her locket with a iron grip and tears were slowly trickling down her face.

"Got enough air?" I asked carefully, holding her at arms length, gently stroking soft patterns on her sides with my hands, attempting to sooth her further.

"I really don't want to forget them, I'm scared that I will" she whispered, not opening her locket but rubbing it between her fingers, with her other hand resting featherly agaisnt my chest.

"You wont, you've got such a big brain you can't I promise" I said honestly,

"Are you saying I've got a big head" She whimpered a laugh and I breathed one too, she waved her hand gesturing she didn't want a reply yet.

"What was that in there then?" She asked pointing, but not looking, to the big house where I could still see my family huddled in the kitchen.

"Everyone makes mistakes Bella" I ushered, stroking her face softly - she folded her hand over mine on her cheek holding it there.

"I'm not meant to - not about _my _Mum" She mumbled, stroking small movements onto my hand that was holding her cheek.

"Your not listening Bella, _everybody _makes mistakes - you were just thinking about your Mum a lot today, its only one mistake - the only one that I have ever witnessed you make. Trust me, please" I begged, leaning closer to her. 'Your right' she answered with a light kiss on my lips.

"I'm sorry. I promised that I wouldn't run again" She whispered as we were walking back to the house hand in hand.

"You just went for a walk, remember?" I reminded her with a big reassuring smile, and tightened my grip on her hand and she smiled with more conviction this time.

"Have I ruined Christmas?" She asked tentatively before we reached the house.

"No Bella, you didn't ruin Christmas" I answered like it was the most riduculous question in the world, "You all but made everybody's Christmas, especially mine" I continued as I held the door open for her, she shrugged in underneath my arm and smiled brightly at me now but she turned to the family that was cautiously waiting for our return.

"I'm sorry Esme" Bella said surprisngly clearly, "I kind of freaked and I'm sorry" She apologised with sincere eyes.

"Its okay Bella, we were just worried" Esme replied kindly, everyone behind her nodded to emphase.

"Speaking of worried, let's see your hands" Carlisle said squeezing his way through the gaggle of people, Bella looked down at her hands and then tilted her head,

"Huh, I hadn't noticed" She replied with such nonchalance that it made us all laugh, "I think I'm okay Carlisle, thank you"

"Well come on then people, let's get the fun started!" Emmett boomed before forming a one-man dance train into the living room and waving Bella's camera at arms length in the air to say 'its turned off now, well actually I'm not sure but its not pointing at me' and the there was a big flash coming from the living room.

"Crap" Emmett muttered to himself, sending us into fits of laughter and poor Bella was almost on the floor.

"Fun indeed"


	44. Chapter 44 Tradition

**EPOV**

The rest of Christmas had been perfect, not that it wasn't before. We had played games all throughout the night which had led to a major lay-in, well for most of us anyway, Bella stirred at around six o'clock - which was kind of late for her and just sat peacefully drawing I think, I was too tired to really pay attention. But today was New Years Day and I had many things to prepare for tonight.

I had to ask Emmett and Jasper to help me, and I had Rosalie and Alice preoccupy Bella until I was done so she wouldn't question my absence. I had put up with Emmett and Jasper making stupid jokes all day while making the several trips there and back, I had put up with the many winks and gestures from the girls when I sneaked back into the house. The girls were watching some girly films that Bella had never seen before. When I poked my head around she looked to be in some sort of pain, I felt that way about girly films too. I just shook the image out of my head because I would have ran up to her and taken her away forever.

We were having our traditional bonfire tonight out in the back garden tonight so Bella thought that we were preparing for that when it really only took twenty minutes. When we did actually finish we swanned into the living room and I sat down next to Bella and lifted my arm up so she could wiggle underneath it and rest against my chest.

"No, I'm not watching 'Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen', that is just not happening!" Emmett whined as Alice was waving the next DVD choice at the us when we were settling. Bella laughed and we all looked at her,

"He doesn't want to watch it because he's afraid you'll realise that he in fact is Lindsay Lohan, and _is _the Teenage Drama Queen" She mocked, and we all burst out laughing. Emmett looked 'sad' and waved his fists playfully at Bella. She raised her hands in surrender and hid her head into my chest.

"I love you" I whispered into her ear,

"I've got something to show you" Bella whispered back, sending flutters of electricity up my spine. She stood up gently and tugged on my arm and pointed up the stairs, like a child, like a beautiful, adorable child. Luckily the others were in a 'major' DVD debate so they didn't notice when we skipped up the stairs.

"Save that for later" Jasper bellowed up the stairs once we were gone and the whole crowd of them started to cackle uncontrollably. I shook my head and Bella turned to me with a quizzical look.

"Come on, what do you have to show me then?" I asked impatiently being dragged into her room.

"Oh the impatience" Bella mocked as she sat me down on her bed. When she walked away from me I finally got to appreciate her outfit choice today. She was wearing her Guns 'n' Roses tee with only her bra underneath and a washed out red cardigan and her favourite jeans. She looked more like herself today than I'd seen her in a long time. I only noticed that she was watching me watching her when I thought about what she'd done with her gorgeous hair. I quickly looked away like a kid unwrapping his birthday presents the day before - some thing that Alice had actually made me do when we were younger. She said 'no its fine Mum and Dad said you can', turns out they didn't. Her hair was down and longer than ever, it seemed to flow all the way down her back, her mahogany locks melted into her red cardigan.

She trotted towards me and held my head up with her cupped hand.

"You can look Edward" She ushered before kissing me fiercely, she dropped her hand from my chin and traced it down my neck. My hands found her hips and pulled her closer to me. She crawled onto the bed and on me and I pulled us down so I was on my back on the soft duvet. I heard her put something beside us but I ignored it because her now free hand was running down my chest. She moaned delicately into my mouth when I ran my cold hand under the back of her top and she pressed herself against me, there was a clang against my chest when her locket fell against me and she pulled away and laughed beautifully. I stared into her eyes and she was uncontrollably happy and I smiled back at her. I then remembered what she had put beside us and looked at it. It was a thin sheet of something. She caught my eyes and wiggled of off me and the bed and stood where she had been and smoothly picked it up and put it behind her back.

"Okay you ready?" She asked softly, smiling widely at me. I nodded eagerly.

"Close your eyes" She instructed, I obliged quickly - my impatience growing again and I held out my hands.

"Open them" She said while placing a laminated sheet of paper in front of me. It was a pencil drawn picture of me and Bella. It was stunning, and so perfectly created. I recognised it as one of the photo's Alice had taken on Bella's birthday. We were looking at each other and in the photo we were standing just in front of the kitchen doorway but in the picture we were the only thing on the sheet, except from underneath us in a beautiful font it said, "I love you"

"It was the first time we told each other that we loved each other" She whispered as I traced over the words.

"I had it laminated so it would last long and so like it wouldn't cringle. Um I could paint it if you want - I thought it was okay like that, should I have put more colour in it? I thought it looked okay with just the hints of colour: I can do it again" She rambled on and on, I tugged on her arm making her fall against me and she cackled as I chuckled, I lay back on the bed and wrapped my arms around her.

"Its perfect Bella, its beautiful, just like you" I whispered, kissing her on her forehead.

"You sure?" She asked carefully,

"Of course I am Bella, and I'm glad you laminated it - I want it to last forever" I said but then tried to suddenly back track in my mind.

"Forever?" She questioned,

"Well, like as long as like you know whenever" I ranted, stumbling over my words losing connection with my brain.

"Edward, shh" She said softly with a laugh and then cut of the connection to my brain completely by kissing me slowly. The lust and passion was there but it was slower, like we didn't need to rush because we did have forever or at least a life time, _pardon?! _I um ah, I um I don't know. Shit, wait - it wouldn't be shit, it would be amazing. _You are _seventeen! _You can not think about the future like that, _well why the hell not? I love her, that's all I need to know. _You're crazy, _no your crazy! I yelled inwardly at myself and then Bella pulled away and looked at me quizzically in the eyes, bringing me out of my mind.

"Something wrong Edward?" She asked, resting her forehead on mine.

"No nothings wrong, everything's brilliant" I whispered, reaching to peck her lips quickly with mine,

"You just went a little spacey on me there" She commented with a large smile,

"Bella, I think you'll find that in fact you are on me" I replied, my smile growing to match hers. We stayed there like that, staring into each others eyes for a couple of minutes before I was rudely brought back to the outside world by some commotion downstairs.

"They must be starting the bonfire soon - we better go" I said sadly as she clambered of off me again and pulled me up with her fingers laced in mine.

"Ahh there they are!" Rosalie chirped as we came into view, "What did take you so long?" She mocked with a mad cackle which led the others too. Esme and Carlisle just shook their heads - probably trying _not _to understand. We had brought our garden benches out of the shed and placed them in a semi-circle around the allocated bon-fire. I led Bella to my favourite bench, we had had it since I was very little and I remembered not being able to touch the ground sitting out here on New Years. It was finally getting dark outside so it was time for Emmett to call;

"Let's light this bad boy!" As he did _every _year, making us cringe to unending limits. Emmett carefully started to light the bonfire and at first it was very, very slow but when it reached the outer edges of the bonfire it flew a light. Bella's breathing hitched as it started flickering different colours of green and blue and purple, it was Esme's favourite. It was the drift wood that we collect from the her beach.

"Its beautiful" Bella whispered to me, I had put my arm around her and she was leaning her head onto my arm.

"I thought you'd like it" I whispered back, the family were all talking to themselves until Carlisle stood up and commanded our attention,

"Right, resolutions time" He said when he was passing around last years resolutions that we had written down. Bella looked up to me with a confused expression and I mouthed to her 'hold on' because Carlisle was about to explain.

"Bella, this is another one of our traditions - every year we write down what we want to come from the next year and our resolutions and if we have completed them by the next New Year we get to put them in the fire. If not you have to carry them on with another new one" He explained carefully, Bella nodded along and then smiled at me brightly and then looked down at the piece of paper I had in my hand, I turned it away from her to make sure she couldn't see, it was slightly embarrassing.

"Okay who wants to go first?" Carlisle asked, everybody shied away except from Esme who stood up with her paper in hand.

"I will then," She chirped and we all turned slightly to look at her, when she had our attention she continued, "I am proud to say that this year I have succeeded,"

"As usual" I whispered into Bella's ear and she turned to me with a strict 'listen' face and then smiled again before turning back to listen to Esme.

"Not that I don't love my family, but last year it was my resolution to take some time for myself and Carlisle, and I have - when we took that vacation at Easter remember? And I have been working more on my interior decorating, I've been doing bits and bobs for my lovely lady friends" We all applauded her when she finished and as she threw the scrappy piece of paper into the fire.

"Emmett, your next" Esme said, and Emmett whined and stood up slowly,

"I'm not sure if I succeeded or not" He mumbled and a small wave of laughter passed over the group but he continued anyway, "My resolution last year was to make Rosalie the happiest girl in the world. And I mean she seems pretty happy but I don't know how happy everyone else is so I don't know" He mumbled again, all of the girls let out a simultaneous 'aww' and Rosalie jumped up and hugged him tightly.

"Throw it in" Rosalie instructed after she let him go,

"Seriously Rose?" Emmett asked pessimistically, and Rosalie nodded and sat back down in her seat.

"Take that last year!" Emmett exclaimed throwing in his piece of paper and then that reminded us that he still had the year prior's resolution,

"No I haven't cut down the amount of video games I play" He grumbled waving the even tattier piece of paper and handing it back to Carlisle. Carlisle shook his head in playful disappointment, but Emmett didn't mind because as soon as he turned around he saw Rose with the biggest grin on her face and his grew into its big childish smile and they sat down, with Rosalie in his lap and _'cuter' _than ever.

"Right, um who to pick" Emmett mused, before inspecting the circle.

"Aha, Jasper!" he exclaimed and Jasper stood up proudly,

"I believe I succeeded, last year I made the resolution that I would concentrate more in school so I can go to the same college as Alice, and now I'm getting straight A's so I'm eligible to go with my little brain box" He exclaimed and Alice was beaming up at him with pride shimmering over her eyes. We all clapped as he threw his piece of paper into the fire.

"I nominate Alice" He said and Alice's face dropped and she sighed to stand up, and glared at him.

"I failed one of mine; to stop shopping so much." She shrugged and then flipped to her other piece of paper as we were laughing. And she smiled menacingly, before she spoke again she stared at me with big eyes, big creepy eyes.

"My second resolution-y thing was that I help my _dearest _brother Edward, find something to make him happier, so Edward, are you happy?" She turned to look at me again and her eyes were menacing.

"Yes, I am very happy" I said looking down to my beautiful Bella who was looking up at me with her bright eyes illuminated by the fire. Alice was about to throw her slip in the fire but I quickly interrupted her;

"But, I'm not sure you helped me _really. _When in all honestly you could have driven her away on your very first shopping trip" I reminded her, and she started to sulk until she found an argument,

"Edward, just let me put it in, I mean your perfectly happy now so how am I going to be able to make you happier?" She pleaded rationally, I took another look down at Bella and realised that I probably couldn't get any happier than having her in my arms forever, with her loving me forever. And with Alice's effort and attention it would end up really annoying me so I nodded and let her throw it to the flames.

**BPOV**

This night was very interesting to me, having all the traditions of such a tight family unravelled and displayed right in front of you. I was eager to hear Edward's resolution, but it was just as interesting to listen to the others aims, how they were all so tightly connected. Alice had nominated Rosalie who then nominated Carlisle; they had saved Edward for last.

"I nominate Edward" Carlisle said, Edward clenched his jaw and shuffled upwards; I sat upright, drowning in the cover of my new hoodie from Emmett and Jasper, and watched him with eager eyes. He pulled the thin piece of paper out of his pocket and sighing heavily at it.

"I just have a little bit of explaining prior if you don't mind" He said to the family and turned back to me.

"You know how some times say 'you've changed my life' and how you always pretend to believe me but you struggle to keep from rolling your eyes and mutter 'for the worst' under your breath" I smiled once he'd paused for a breath, "Yeah I did notice" He said with a smile on his face too before he continued, "But I really mean it Bella – I mean before you I was this giant walking cliché, like the whole 'bad boy, no body understands me' sort of thing, and all I wanted to do was change or for everything else to change, because I didn't really feel anything towards anything. And yes, it was hideous" There were slight rumblings of laughter from behind me but he rolled his eyes and continued, "So," He said, turning on his heels back to the rest of the family, but still turning to me slightly.

"My resolution last year was to have passion in something that I could really believe in" Edward said proudly, "And I have done that, possibly ten times over" He said with a giant smile turning back to me. Everybody clapped again before he came to sit down again.

"Will you believe me from now on?" He whispered into my ear as everybody started talking again, I looked up to him and nodded,

"What happens now?" I asked quietly, and Edward flicked his head up to Carlisle and I followed his eyes to see Carlisle handing out little pieces of paper and a pen to everyone – they were _very _organised.

"Okay everyone, new resolutions" He said once he'd sat back down in his place. Everybody stared at the paper in front of them. Only Esme and Carlisle had started. I didn't know what to write. I looked up to Edward for guidance and he was already writing! I tried to peek but he shifted away from me with a gorgeous cheeky grin creeping onto his lips as I sulked and started to think.

Of course, whenever I think it leads me back to Edward. And I couldn't just put Edward as my resolution. I wanted to make up everything that he had given me and give it back, ten times over. I wanted him to feel all the love and admiration that he deserves. I wanted this wonderful family never to regret taking me in.

_In the next year and forever afterwards, I want to make this family forever proud of me and I want to make them happy. I am going to make my life worth living, forget the bad memories and stop holding onto them. __I am going to make sure that Edward Cullen is I'm going to provide happiness._

_I am going to love Edward Cullen until the day I die, and __hope that I__ spend everyday with him to the fullest. No regrets. _

Everybody had long but finished and was looking at me eagerly as I pondered over and over what to say and then I finished and looked up and they started to laugh as I put the note into Carlisle's hand. I just shrugged and Edward kissed me on the forehead delicately.

"It's nearly twelve, we'll get the champaign" Carlisle said casually and my mouth dropped, and Edward started to chuckle at me.

"Champaign, on New Years?" I asked in disbelieve, Edward struggled to get a hold of himself before he replied,

"It's another tradition, we've done it for years – it's only a glass each, it doesn't go that far" Edward replied, staring deeply into my eyes. I think he was looking for something more, for something beneath but I couldn't tell what. Esme and Carlisle came back outside elegantly, Esme carrying the large bottle while Carlisle carried the tray full of glasses. He came around and handed us a glass individually before going full circle and settling the tray down beside their bench. Esme was coming around after him following with the champaign, she smiled at me widely while she was pouring mine carefully.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" She asked with such happiness in her voice it sounded like if she spoke for too long she would simply erupt in laughter.

"Yep, very much so – thank you" I replied happily also, who wouldn't be with Edward's arm wrapped around your shoulder while your head is leaning on his shoulder and your legs intertwined in his while his mother poured you champaign in front of the most amazing fire surrounded by the most wonderful family. I was pulled out of my mind-rant when Edward tugged on my hand willing me to stand up. I looked around and everybody else was standing up too looking towards Carlisle. He stood with one arm around Esme and he was watching his watch on his other hand.

"Ten," Carlisle started then we all joined in quickly, counting down steadily. "Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three" Edward's grip on my waist tightened and I looked up to him; careful not to stop counting and he smiled down at me brightly. "Two, one! Happy New Year!" Everyone bellowed and before I had a chance to breath Edward wrapped his other arm around me and picked me up so I was to his eye level. I raised my eyebrows asking 'Here? Now?' he smiled and then looked over my shoulder, I followed his eyes to see everybody else engaged in rather cute but gross New Year kissing session. I turned back to look at him and mimicked vomiting and he laughed lightly, his breath warming my cold face. I mirrored his stare into my eyes, and instead of kissing fiercely like the couples around us we stayed like that but I lent my forehead against his.

"What a happy new year it is"

* * *

**Just wanted to say a few things; thank you to everyone who is reviewing, it's really nice to hear from you and it's all nice constructive criticism so thank you. I am working very hard on my mistakes, many there is I know. I am not perfect, and I am only human – I should proof read better but I get a little impulsive and once I finish I want to start writing the next and I just upload it – sorry. But also, no that it is an excuse but I have been without Word and instead I've been using WordPad, and for me it makes a lot of difference, sorry and I am working on it. Hope you guys are enjoying it still x**


	45. Chapter 45 Perfection

**EPOV**

My family had _finally _finished there gross sessions and turned to look at us and all started to mutter things like, "they are adorable" etc. I would have said they whispered but unfortunately they were not that kind and said it loud enough that both Bella and I could hear. Bella went bright red and detached herself from me. We talked for a bit more with the rest of them but they started to shuffle in doors and go there separate ways.

"What do we do now?" Bella asked quietly, looking up at me with her beautiful big eyes – not a hint of tiredness in them, she was bright and alive like we had just woken up.

"We are going somewhere" I said indicating that it was just the two of us and she smiled brightly and I stood up, dragging her with me and wrapped my arm over he shoulders and she laced her fingers in the hand that was resting there.

"Where to?" She asked as I dragged her past the house and into the woods.

"Secret Bella" I told her but it wasn't long into the forest when the fairy lights trailed along the floor and she gasped and nearly started to jump up and down. I had put the fairy lights on the floor so I could keep track of where we were going at this time of night.

"Really Edward?" She pleaded skipping backwards so she was still facing me but getting there quicker.

"I don't know" I answered, shrugging my shoulders and outreaching for her hands, she obliged and laced her fingers through mine again. Her smile was bouncing of off her face as we grew closer and closer. The journey there seemed to take no time at all because Bella seemed much more enthusiastic to get there tonight.

"So why does it say 'masterful' on the back of your hoodie?" I asked casually, it had made me very curious as to when I would have missed out on the joke, I hardly ever leave Bella alone with Jasper and Emmett – not that I wouldn't just normally if I have to leave her alone at all it would be because of Rosalie and Alice.

"It was that night we met, you know when you went inside to get my stuff and you asked Emmett and Jasper stay out side with me" She told me, nearly laughing from the memory.

"And basically, Jasper introduced himself again as the 'masterful Jasper' and then Emmett went um I think it was like 'more like master-not'" I was chuckling lowly to myself because she tried to do a ridiculous Emmett impression. "So Jasper and me started laughing at him and then I said that Emmett should have said 'masterful-of-shit', its not that funny any more but I was practically crying in laughter after that, so that is one little in-joke that you my wonderful Edward are not in on" She chuckled to herself and nearly started to skip again.

"Does your family know that you used to smoke?" She asked completely out of the blue,

"I don't think so, but I didn't think they needed to know, I didn't do it for long." I was about to ask 'what about you?' but then decided against it, her family were oblivious or dead.

"I'm glad that we don't anymore, dirty habit my Mum always used to say" She mumbled, nearly to herself but she looked up at me brightly,

"Good, look we are nearly here – do you want to close your eyes?" I asked her, slowing to a stop,

"Edward, if I close my eyes I wont be able to see" She mocked as she skipped back to me and turned so I could cover her eyes with my hand, with the other I led her forward carefully.

"I can feel it, we are here aren't we?" She asked her impatience growing as I stood her on the edge of our meadow.

"How on earth can you feel it?" I questioned disbelievingly, still covering her eyes.

"The air changed its straight and cooler – in the trees it is warmer" She stated matter-of-factly.

"How do you know that it's not just windy?"

"Because there is very little wind Edward, and it is blowing in the same direction and probably at a lower speed if anything than when we started our journey" She said casually again, of course – I knew that…

"And there is grass under my shoes, it's a different texture, and the light has changed – it's making your hands go red. And if that wasn't enough – your breathing changed and your smiling so much I can basically see it" She told me,

"I should never doubt you" I whispered into her ear, and I saw her skin shudder beneath me.

"I know that's what I've been saying" She said quickly in return but suddenly spun around under my hand and her eyes were gripped tightly shut.

"Edward, what are we doing here?" She asked with her eyes still shut only now she had moved her hand up to cover them.

"I just thought um it would mean more to you this way, out here. But we can go back, if you want" I rambled and Bella pouted,

"Edward, are we out here to oh my god, sorry okay yeah" She said spinning herself around again and grabbing my hand to replace hers with mine.

"I'm ready" She told me and I took her one step forward,

"Are you sure?" I asked carefully,

"Yes Edward" She said sternly, getting impatient again and I dropped my hand dramatically from her eyes and awaited her reaction.

**BPOV  
**

"Bella?" Edward asked tentatively as my mouth hung open still lost for words. I was looking around at the beautiful meadow even more beautiful in the night, light by a million fairy lights and small lights dotted around the whole meadow. There was a large black blanket in front of a tent. It was amazing, and Edward had done this all for me, for us.

"Bella?" He asked again, when I didn't answer, the panic rising slowly through his words, again when I didn't acknowledge him he ran around to my front, blocking the view from the meadow and instead replacing it with a more beautiful image, Edward's face. I smiled brightly at him in reassurance and he smiled back at me. He looked angelic the way the lights refracted around him making him glow. In his eyes there was deep emotion running through them, the green depths were never ending and I desperately wanted to understand every emotion that I could see, I wanted to know everything about him, I wanted to be with him completely.

"Is it okay?" He asked, placing his hands carefully on my cheeks and at that moment words just weren't enough. I tiptoed slowly and stared into his eyes as they flooded with realisation, I smiled as the thoughts dawned on him and he smiled too. I kissed him daintily on the lips and he moved his hands from my cheeks to one behind my neck and one trailed down my side to reach my waist. He was walking back carefully and we were engulfed by the beautiful light. I looked up and was stunned again by the sky, it was the deepest of blues and the stars dotted the sky like tiny footsteps across the sky. They shone so brightly and stood out dramatically against the dark, dark blue.

"It's beautiful Edward" I whispered, lowering my eyes back to his. His eyes were staring at mine with a loving intensity that I wished would never leave them.

"Nearly as beautiful as you" He whispered back, and I rolled my eyes and he burst out a breath of laughter and the sound filled my ears and mind and I wanted to be with him forever, and ever, and ever.

"I love you Edward" I said after a silent minute,

"I love you too" He said sincerely, his eyes told me just how much, too much. But I didn't care anymore.

"Stop thinking that" He told me and I stared back into his eyes completely baffled,

"Bella, I know you just as well as you know me – I saw the arguments in your eyes" He said again,

"But I, just humph" I moaned and he laughed again,

"I love you Bella Swan, end of – deal with it please?" He mocked, placing a delicate kiss on my lips, sending anticipation running through my veins. I kissed him back with no urgency but more meaning and he grasped at my waist pulling me upwards, I wrapped my legs around his waist and pushed myself closer to him. My hands ran down up and down his back and ended up tangled in his wondrous hair. He moaned lightly as I tried to get even closer to him, even more of him. Somehow we gently flopped onto the blanket and I was hovering over him. He broke away and looked at me strongly, 'you sure?' he asked me with worried eyes that flashed down our bodies. 'Shut up' I answered by kissing him again. His hands raced underneath my hoodie and he slowly lifted it off me and I wiggled out of it when he reached as far as he could. I shook my hair out of the hoodie and he gasped from below me. Once I reached his mouth with my lips again he rolled us over so he was on top of me and he shrugged out of his own shirt. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and pulled him closer to me again. Our other clothes were slowly shred and when he paused again, his green eyes boring into mine I knew from then, no regrets. We were meant to be, our bodies moved in sync our minds were connected on a level I didn't think anyone could ever understand. Nobody needed to understand, Edward and I were forever and we were ready for forever.

........

**EPOV**

I started to stir awake slowly and I twitched my head slightly and then remembered that I was sleeping on Bella's bare stomach, it had gotten very surprisingly too hot in the tent to put our clothes back on, and we only slept with half of the sleeping bag that I had brought with us.

"Under the stars Edward" Bella murmured from above me. I gently kissed her flat stomach before raising my head again to rest it on the pillows, I raised my arm and signalled for her to go under my arm and rest her head against my chest. Last night had been as perfect. We made love under the stars and it was everything I could of imagined and more. We moved in complete synchronisation and I was looking down at her and the lights around us had made her skin illuminate and shine like the moon. She was glorious, in every way shape and form.

"Do we have to leave soon?" She asked and I rolled over making her flop on the tent floor and laugh sleepily. I took a quick look at my phone and it was only six in the morning.

"Have you realised something Bella?" I asked turning back to her, resting on my elbows, she had her limbs spread out in a stretch and her back was arched and her hands balled.

"Probably not" She mumbled crawling over to me and throwing her legs across mine and resting her head on my shoulder.

"It's dark outside" I whispered, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

"Dark?" She questioned, confused and adorable.

"Yep, dark" I replied chirpily and waited for her to understand.

"Dark, hmm oh!" She quickly shuffled out of my hold and taking the sleeping bag with her wrapped around her.

"Hey!" I whisper-shouted after her, as she crawled from the tent

"Sorry," She mumbled while watching me as I crawled out after her grabbing the sleeping bag and wrapping it around the both of us. We sat down with Bella in between my legs and her back resting against my chest. We waited in comfortable silence until the sun started to rise.

"I think that we could call this perfect" Bella mumbled in front of me.

"Call what perfect Bella?" I asked, resting my chin on her bare shoulder.

"Us, our relationship, our love – I think it's as close to perfect as anybody is going to get, seeing as perfection doesn't actually exist. But I think we could get away with it, what do you think?" She ranted as she turned her head slightly towards me, the sun was climbing in the sky slowly and the darkness of the night had faded.

"I think I agree with you Bella," I whispered into her cheek that was now facing me, she smiled widely at me and swivelled herself fully around and rested her arms over my neck.

"Perfect" She whispered back at me before pushing us backwards back onto the blanket, and she started to kiss me passionately again, she broke off quickly for air and stared deeply into my eyes,

"Absolutely perfect"


	46. Epilogue: The Start

**BPOV  
**

"Hey Mum" I whispered, quietly clutching at my locket and looking at her headstone, it held no good memories for me. It was bland and just like the others and nothing like my mother.

"It's been too long I know but I moved away from here. I moved to Forks two years ago now, wow two years – goes pretty quickly doesn't it?" I laughed and sighed at all the happiness that had grown inside of me, even though Forks was my home now I relished in the bright sunlight, even in the winter the Arizona sun shone proudly, bouncing around me and warming my skin.

"I've missed you, especially before. You should be here, so should Charlie. I can't believe you didn't tell me, well I can now. But I was so angry at you Mum – for being weaker than him. But I understand now, I guess. It wasn't your fault, you thought you needed him, but we didn't Mum. I just needed you" I spoke calmly now; I had spoke about this many times now. Edward said that it would be healthy for me; he was the doctor in training. His passion was music but when he found out what other things he could do with his magical hands he had to change, he still plays the piano.

"I must tell you about Edward" I mumbled when I was getting too carried away with thoughts of him in my mind. I twiddled the beautiful ring resting on my hands, "My fiancée, he asked me to marry me Mum! I'm getting married in the summer, how incredible is that! If you were here you'd rant off about how I'm too young and this is just a crush, but it's not. It's beautiful, so is he. He is the most stunning thing in the whole world, he is my whole world. He made my life worth living again Mum. After you died, after I ran away it just felt wrong, like I was waiting for something but I didn't have a clue what it was but now I do; it was Edward.

"And his family Mum, well nearly my family but they are amazing. They took me in, I was a complete stranger! They've looked after me, through some really, really bad times. I was a mess, but they've all helped me through it. They are so loving, so kind, and so generous and somehow, I fit in with them. Even though we are at college now we still see them a lot, you would never guess where I'm going to college. Dartmouth! It's incredible, I never even thought about college, I mean ever. And now I'm studying art and the history of art, and I might be thinking about training to be an art teacher. It was Edward's idea. Its crazy Mum, my life has just exploded in a good way, a fantastic way. Like a firework, my life was a tiny little sparkler and Edward jammed it in with the rest of the fireworks and now they are meshed together and flying into the sky, spraying beautiful colours, flying around the dark night sky, all the other choices and sparks fall to the ground as I chose the right ones, the ones with Edward. Hell, I don't know if they are the right decisions, they could be the completely wrong decisions and I'll end up being catatonic, but at least Edward would be there with me.

"I bet I sound like a fool, but I just can't put it into words sufficient enough to explain. Words are not sufficient, I don't know what would be enough to explain how I feel. I mean come on, the family gave me plane tickets just to come and speak to you, it was my Christmas present. A Christmas present! It's bizarre how much my life has changed. All because of choices and things that other people have done. If that criminal hadn't shot Charlie I wouldn't have gone to the party, I wouldn't have met Edward they way I had. If you had never left Charlie, it would have been so different. But even the smaller things, like if my plane got delayed, or I had been punched and fell just a little bit harder. If Edward had never smoked, or if the party hadn't actually bored him out of his mind, if his sister wasn't so persistent, if Rosalie did have such a strong hatred of the idea of bringing me home that I stayed alone. Maybe if I had a working lighter, maybe if he didn't. All of these things could have changed so easily and I wonder if Edward and I would have been together at all. But then I realise, yes – of course we would. There is no way that we couldn't have been together, I believe in something bigger now Mum, not just cold logic and numbers that run across my mind, I believe in colour and love and fate, destiny.

"Phil tried to find me, he didn't. But he tried. I nearly, well I did completely break down again. It was like I couldn't avoid everything, it would all catch up with me and I would never be able to escape. I ran away, Edward found me. Under impossible chances Mum! I ran into a forest, a big forest on the side of a road and Edward picked the same one, and everything that happened in their could of happened differently but he would have found me, and I would have gone back." Remembering Phil brought icy anger running through my veins I was no longer scared, he couldn't hurt me now.

"Phil is dead. He messed with the wrong people I guess, or maybe it was fate again. He was killed in a car "accident" and yes you can basically hear the air quotes around accident. I don't know. I pray that he is not with you, I don't care, whatever you've done you do not deserve to be with him again. No body does. I hope you're safe and happy now, free like you always wanted to be. Edward has set me free. Sorry, everything I say ends up back to Edward.

"He completes me, I like to thing that I do the same for him. He tries to convince me that he loves me equally as I love him but I never tire of telling him of just how impossible that is. And he always argues that if that amount of love is impossible than how could I be capable of it and he couldn't, I counter with that he is not in love with himself, and if he were he would know. Whatever he come-backs with, I win by arguing that I am in-fact batman." I heard Edward laugh behind me and I turned to look at him and he was beautiful as ever. His hair glowed deep copper in the sunlight and he was wearing a white shirt, un-tucked and some light blue jeans, his eyes always twinkled now. I smiled brightly at him and waved him over, he raised his eyebrows carefully, and I nodded waving my hand again. He shrugged over to me and laced his fingers in mine and smiled down at my engagement ring as he stroked my hand and I smiled back to him. He gently rubbed his thumb against a few stray tears across my cheek and nodded slowly, suggesting for me to continue.

"Mum, this is Edward, Edward this is my Mum, Renee" I laughed a short laugh because the amount I talk about Renee he might as well have known her as long as I have. Edward gave a light kiss to my hand and shuffled me so I was sitting on his lap now.

"You created the most spectacular person this planet will ever know, for that I will always be grateful to you Renee" Edward spoke to my mother through my eyes, his eyes were shimmering over but he was smiling and his eyes kept digging into mine.

"You saved me Bella" He said slowly and meaningfully, his eyes reached my soul as mine reached his. We loved each other and would never stop. We were going to get married and label it for the world to see, and we would live out our lives in each others warm embrace, this was the start of our lives, and we would see the end together. Love isn't perfect, love is hard. But we were both strong now, we made each other stronger, he put me back together with love that would never fade.

"But you Edward, saved my heart"


End file.
